hooker stories

[grimcity]

Haha, no, not that kind of POV (please mercy god no)... I mean we had the perfect real-life cinematic seats in the house.

[rawbertson.]

04, i was eighteen, chillin on a rooftop overlookin the downtown with a 12 of dollar-brews, blazed up. i threw rocks at this fellon and he climbed up the ladder, as he shoutin "throw fists not stones!" i grabbed a few more of those joints just in case, ran down the staircase, fiends basin, pissy stairwells, wasnt tryin to start nothin. mind is driftin, end up split up from the crew. celly dead, -10 in october. no way of meetin cuz-o's. hit the td, got a bill, hit up the rub and tug. minute later, sprayed a giant load on this ho, nutted in her hair like its "there's somethin about mary".

[Nic]

First time going to the SPOT it was 8 at night, if you've ever been there you know it's not the best neighborhood. I go into a gas station to ask for directions and this ugly lady asks me if I want a BJ for 50 bucks. She had no teeth and I actually wondered what it would feel like. Then I realized my dick would probably fall off if I put it in her mouth.

[Prison Wallet]

hit the td, got a bill, hit up the rub and tug.

I think that's a good story Rawb but what's this part mean?

[j0rdan]

TD is a canadian bank

[Cthulhu!]

Uh, sometimes I see them from my car window. I don't even have any stories. I've never had any interactions with one. This makes me want to drive over to a sketchy part of town to see what they do.

[Dark Knight]

hahaha yes

[Ronald Wilson Reagan]

Vince looks fucking insane in that picture. Think some tacky people will dress up as Chris Brown and beaten up Rhianna for halloween?

[The Drew]

on quiet nights in town the ladies of the night always seem to ask me if i want a "massage" but i always politely decline and tell them to have a nice night

[rawbertson.]

when i was in montreal this fuckin old bitch came up to me and said "do you have 2 bucks for the bus" and i said "nope i only got bills and debit i aint no small time player this is big willie shit, fall the fuck back ho" and she said "can i have a 5? do ya want a blowjob?" and i laughed and said "not from you!" bounced on that trife

[Allen.]

none of that ever happened... did it?

[Narcissus]

none of that ever happened... did it?

you were there...remember?

[Narcissus]

[rawbertson.]

none of that ever happened... did it?

in case you didnt know i dont actually talk like that in real life. im pretty sure no one does. but yes that really did happen but i didnt talk like that.

[gordon bombay]

Never actually did anything with one, but it was still an experience. It was one of my first nights ever in montreal and I was completely shit faced and slurring my words by 9pm. Not sure what time it was at this point, but it was late enough I'm assuming. So we're walking around on st.catherines and I get a phone call and I let my friends walk ahead so that I could talk to who ever. I get done with my convo and realize that my friends are no where to be seen, and since I was pacing back an forth on the phone I have no idea what direction I came from or was walking to. i sit on a bench trying to call my friends but most of their phones are off, and some woman sits next to me. She spoke some sort of French Canadian broken English, and looked decent enough to a drunk American in montreal for the first time who has been gawking at hot french canadian girls all day. eventually we agreed to go to a bar (or at least that’s what I thought was going on). So we're in a cab and im fondling her ass and playing with her thong in the back seat. At this point shes steadily talking to the cab driver and I have no idea what's going on, other than the fact that im fondling this womans ass and she is absolutely not caring at all. We pull up to some apt building and she says something to the cab driver in French and then something to me and gets out. Mustve been along the lines of "wait here" or something because im just sitting there at this point watching the meter go up. About 5 minutes go by and the driver is like "you going aaap?!" and saying other things to me in French so i just nod and say "yeah of course" and things like that. So im still waiting in this cab, starting to stress because the meter is going up, wondering where this girl is, and I get a call from a buddy in the states. I immediately tell him whats going on and his first reaction is "dude are you getting a prostitute?" At this point I see the girl walking down the stairs with some dude and I jump out of the cab and run in the opposite direction, yelling to me friend over the phone "dude shes definitely a hooker! definitely a hooker!"

hah, kind of un eventful I guess but a story none the less

[rawbertson.]

pussy, i would have hit it

[FROST YOUR TIPS]

2 summers ago when I was in Vancouver I saw a cop pick up a hooker

[RightCoastBiased]

2 summers ago when I was in Vancouver I saw a cop pick up a hooker

Did he ever put her back down!?!? I've got to know, the suspense is killing me!

[Bipsmound]

Years ago I saw a cop car parked under a bridge with the passenger door open and legs sticking out.  From what I could tell it was some sort of quasi homeless woman throwing down a bj.  Pretty sketchy.

[Smurph]

I don't think I've any stories of me personally (apart from dodging them), but I've a few lame one's from friends.

A few years ago when we were in Barcelona, this gnarly alcoholic/drug addict guy, who years prior had skated temporarily, decided to come with us for the nightlife. During the holiday we wouldn't really see him as he'd just go off on coke binges but one night we met him out and he told us he lost all his money and his phone. He told us some hooker dragged him down some alley and he wasted five condoms on her( fuck knows how!) He's a brutally honest guy so he told us straight out that she robbed his phone and all his coke by getting her 'friends' to come down the alley and finish him off.

Edit - Actually, I remember a few years ago we were skating some spot in the evening in the city and a hooker was just shouting at us going crazy, 'would you all just fuck off I'm trying to work here!' She was just standing on the side of the road and we were just laughing. Then she called her pimp on us so we just stopped laughing.

[Ronald Wilson Reagan]

A friend of mine got wasted and coked up and got a hooker off of craigslist, when she got there, he changed his mind and wouldn't let her in, she called the pimp, who bear maced him, when simultaneously the cops who the neighbor's called because the hooker was screaming at 4 a.m. arrived. The pimp and ho ran off, and the dude got arrested while he was still incompacitated by the hooker.

You know, if they ever do another skate related movie, I hope the author researches it here and all the non-skate scenes involve hookers or fat chicks and lots of drugs.

[El Chupacabra]

I used to skate a ledge on Sunset Blvd in Hollywood and on weekend nights, hookers would congregate on the same corner.
They were generally pretty friendly but it was still kind of a sad sight. No way I'd ever put it in a ho though, I'm content to be herpes free.

Every now and then a SUV would drive past and this skinny black dude would lean out of the window and yell things like "BITCHWHYAINTYOUWORKINBESTBEGETTINMAHMONEY!!" in a high pitched Chris Rock-esque voice until he went around the block.

[Claude Tanner]

I don't think I've any stories of me personally (apart from dodging them), but I've a few lame one's from friends.

A few years ago when we were in Barcelona, this gnarly alcoholic/drug addict guy, who years prior had skated temporarily, decided to come with us for the nightlife. During the holiday we wouldn't really see him as he'd just go off on coke binges but one night we met him out and he told us he lost all his money and his phone. He told us some hooker dragged him down some alley and he wasted five condoms on her( fuck knows how!) He's a brutally honest guy so he told us straight out that she robbed his phone and all his coke by getting her 'friends' to come down the alley and finish him off.

Edit - Actually, I remember a few years ago we were skating some spot in the evening in the city and a hooker was just shouting at us going crazy, 'would you all just fuck off I'm trying to work here!' She was just standing on the side of the road and we were just laughing. Then she called her pimp on us so we just stopped laughing.

Was it this guy?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MghNErW9iW8
	Small | Large

[Matze]

^^i remember that dude ...

[Watson]

I think I told this story on here once, but a friend of mine was walking home from the bar in late fall and it was pretty cold outside. He asked a hooker how much for a blowjob and she said 40 bucks or something, and he offered her 15. She informed him that's not how these things work, so he went on his way.

Just before he made it home (actually he was staying at another one of our friends' apartments), he decided to turn around and give it another shot. So when he made it back to her he told her "Look here's the deal: You can stand out here in the cold and make no money, or you can come with me where it's warm and make 15 bucks." The obvious logic of the statement won her over and she agreed. Then he took her home and tried to take her into the apartment but our friend who's place it was was like "What the fuck are you doing?!" So he took her to the laundry room and got his dick sucked.

By the way Claude, I wrote a black metal song the other day and sang it with the lyrics of your poem. It was sublime.

[vegan*shawn]

I lived in the Tenderloin area of SF two different times. The first place I lived the apartment manager was this crazy old queen who hated hookers, there was this door that was below sidewalk level, he would sneak out it with a water hose and spray the hookers with water. The second place I lived we had roof access, so my friend and I would go up there and throw rocks at the hookers and drug dealers, they would run and hide in the alley and yell "we know where you live, we are going to kill you" ha ha so funny.