Charlie Sheen wins life

he got fired from 2 And A Half Men

http://www.variety.com/article/VR1118033480

http://www.tmz.com/2011/03/07/charlie-sheen-two-and-a-half-men-tv-fired-letter-warner-bros-television/

and here's a pretty awesome interview he just did

"What do I fear? Failure. Unhirable failure..." via http://www.empireonline.com/
Charlie Sheen's Classic Pint Of Milk

Don't know if you've noticed, but Charlie Sheen's been in the news lately, seemingly undergoing the most public meltdown since Emil from Robocop had that run-in with a vat of toxic waste. The Two And A Half Men star (former star?) has been giving excruciatingly candid interviews as well, in which he leaves virtually no stone unturned.

Yet this is not exactly new behavior for Sheen. In the early part of 1995, Empire's then-Editor, Philip Thomas, interviewed Sheen for our How Much Is A Pint Of Milk? feature. The resulting interview is so candid, so funny, so shocking and so alarmingly prescient (in so many ways), that when we re-read it, we knew we had to share it with the world. The film he was promoting, by the way, was Terminal Velocity. Seems apt.

You're known as a bit of a ladies' man. What's the most number of people you've had sex with at any one time?
If I give the honest answer, are they gonna think I'm just a fucking perverted louse, or some kind of hero?

It probably depends who's reading it.
Well, one night, I don't know how, I found myself in my bedroom with five girls at once. It was a pile-up, a total pile-up, man. And it wasn't so much about going Caligula, it was very organised. Very ordered. And not to sound like I'm bragging, but all six people in that room came out of it pretty satisfied. Hey, I'm Spanish-Irish. I mean, shit, that's a volatile combination...

Where's the strangest place you've ever had sex?
In one of the tunnels at a stadium in Indianapolis, Indiana, where we were shooting Eight Men Out. I had sex with one of the girls working on the film.

When you kiss a co-star, do you use tongues?
Yeah. Nastassja [Kinski, co-star of Terminal Velocity] didn't want to at first, and I wasn't gonna push it. You usually talk about it with the director so it feels like you're discussing business. She said, "I just don't do that," but I can remember watching movies where I swear to God she did...

What do your real-life partners think about you snogging women onscreen?
Some get turned on by it, and with some you just hear about it for days - "I know you were enjoying it!" (Sarcastically) "No, baby, I was thinking about you..."

If Oliver Stone, Kiefer Sutherland and Nastassja Kinski were up against a wall and you had to shoot one to keep the others alive, who would it be and why?
I would off Kiefer. Because that way Oliver and Nastassja will get a chance to work with each other. Yeah, I'll just put Kiefer right out of his misery. Remove him from his hell. And mine.

When did you last worry about money?
About a week ago. I'm a big collector of baseball memorabilia, and there was an auction that came up and I really wanted an item - the first ever Shoeless Joe Jackson bat. I talked to my business manager, "Will we have enough money, without digging into the kitty?" She said no.

How much was it?
It opened at $50,000 and I'm guessing it closed at $150,000. But that's wanting money and it not being available. Does that count as a worry?

Not really.
Things were a little tight right after Hot Shots! because as I was making my money, it was going into a house I was building. The budget went up close to a million dollars because of this builder breaking regulations. He split the country. I was worried then. I dunno, man. I feel that the more you worry about money the less you have. Money to me is energy. You can purchase freedom.

Do lunchtime queues at banks piss you off?
Yeah, but the extent of my banking is one of those machines. If I can't get by on $1000 a day, cash, I should be shot, right?

Probably, yes. If a woman is nice to you, do you wonder if she's after your looks, or your face, your money, yourself, or what?
If it's an extraordinarily beautiful woman, you really can put aside those concerns. Whatever she wants, she still has to go through me to get it, right?

If you had to lose an arm or your movie career, which would you choose?
Fuck. (Long pause.) Career. Because I'm a baseball player, and the thought of not being able to swing a bat, or even to feel both breasts at the same time...

Do you do your own shopping?
I do. I spend a good amount of time in the grocery store. I sample stuff. Occasionally get a nitrous hit off a whipped cream can...

How much is a pint of milk?
It's gotta be about $2.50, three bucks, I dunno. Am I close? How many pounds is a pint of milk?

About 35, 40 pence. Sixty cents or so.
Yeah. You know, I get to the checkout line and I see people who can barely afford their food, and I wanna stand there for an hour and pay for everybody's food.

So why don't you?
I did it in a liquor store once. They all just flushed through. Only cost about 200 bucks, nothing crazy...

Have you ever been tempted to punch a director?
Absolutely. Stephen Herek's a good dude, and afterwards I felt bad, but there was a day on Musketeers when he wanted me to ride a horse bareback and with explosions, it was stunt work basically, and I didn't feel I had to do it. He kept needling me. I thought about dropping him, but that's not gonna help anybody.

When was the last time you did hit someone?
I hit a guy in Phoenix. He was with three friends, taunting me about my family and shit. Really asinine shit. I turned away and backfisted him. He went down in a heap. Then lawsuits. It never got to court and never made the press...

Did you have to pay damages?
About $75,000.

Was it worth it?
It felt pretty good, to tell you the truth.

What do you fear?
Failure. Unhirable, shutdown failure. Sharks. Death.

Is God a man with a big white beard?
Not really. I believe more in the force, a universal power or something that has some hand in our destinies. Religion is for people who are trying to stay out of hell and spirituality is for people who've been through it.

Do you still do drugs?
Not really. When I was doing them it was really fucking things up. I drink off and on, but I'm not as committed to it because I have a bad oesophagus. I've been very good at keeping away from the blow and the pills and all that shit.

If you woke up one morning to find you were Bruce Willis, what's the first thing you'd do?
I'd roll over and have a go at Demi.

What's the most you've ever paid for a pair of shoes?
I think about $2,000.

Two thousand dollars?
Eighteen hundred. But I've had more use out of those shoes than any others. Versace.

Is Tarantino the new Scorsese?
Until he gives me a Taxi Driver or a Raging Bull, I don't think so. But he's someone I wanna work with, I know that. I'm done with the action adventures and the comedies. It's time to get serious again.

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