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Author Topic: Things You've Said to Women that Didn't Quite Work  (Read 2643 times)
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DaSk8D00D
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« on: March 30, 2012, 09:34:19 PM »

Just gonna get this shit started before i goto bed.


for me i'd been hittin on this one girl back in my junior year in high school. she was pretty much my dream bitch. anyway she was feelin me as well but she had a long-term boyfriend who also happened to play basketball for Bradley,so the younger version of me thinkin like "i barely have a chance". anyway one day we were talkin and she basically had asked me out. cant remember exactly what she said, but it was somewhat indirect and i thought it was just a joke so i (again, the YOUNGER version of me) said some shit like "naw b you needa step ya game up first" just on some playful shit cuz we'd always joke around with eachother n whatnot. low and behold this bitch was DEAD ASS SERIOUS and got mad as fuck, went n told all her other friends RIGHT AFTERWARDS and i had to deal with a bunch of black girls callin me "bogish, mean, blah blah blah" for about a week. long story short we was still cool afterwards but the romance was totally gone, and i had lost mostly all chances to wife up a bad bitch. I had to take the L that day, and my frustrated teenage heart ached for about a month.


anyways, tell yo own lil stories n whatnot, i know a few of yall got some gems....
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Hercules Rockefeller
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« Reply #1 on: March 31, 2012, 04:07:07 AM »

hello.
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Matze
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« Reply #2 on: March 31, 2012, 04:22:26 AM »

"wanna make out?"
"look at this girl, she would be perfect for a threesome"
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essal
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« Reply #3 on: March 31, 2012, 04:27:31 AM »

This shit happened last weekend. I'm really stoked and bummed at the same time, cause she was probably a keeper.

I was talking to this girl for 5 minutes or so when a club closed, and without me remembering what the hell happened before she said "I'm not taking you home tonight, but we can get together tomorrow"
My answer was "Nah, I'm dead broke tomorrow"..

What a dumbass Huh
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Beer Keg Peg Leg
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« Reply #4 on: March 31, 2012, 05:16:05 AM »

howdy darlin, how about i bend you over a barrel and show you the whole 50 states






















oh wait that works every fucking time.
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Pearl
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« Reply #5 on: March 31, 2012, 06:24:09 AM »


I was talking to this girl for 5 minutes or so when a club closed, and without me remembering what the hell happened before she said "I'm not taking you home tonight, but we can get together tomorrow"
My answer was "Nah, I'm dead broke tomorrow"..

What a dumbass Huh


 
Too late to be drinking coffee Small | Large

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paulhartman4prez
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« Reply #6 on: March 31, 2012, 07:05:54 AM »

I used to have this really bad habit of getting drunk and asking girls to watch sci fi with me. Never has that ever worked.
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Patey
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« Reply #7 on: March 31, 2012, 07:47:08 AM »

"your face, i like that shit"
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Omamori
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« Reply #8 on: March 31, 2012, 07:51:07 AM »

Not saying anything at all.
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CHASE WEBB
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« Reply #9 on: March 31, 2012, 07:51:20 AM »

can i eat your snatch after nyjah unloads inside you lol
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CUDDLEMONSTER
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« Reply #10 on: March 31, 2012, 08:32:35 AM »

I used to have this really bad habit of getting drunk and asking girls to watch sci fi with me. Never has that ever worked.

i was just joking around at a party and asked a girl "wanna go back to my apartment, get high and watch star trek?" she said "engage." never in my life have i had a harder boner. found out later that she flicks the bean to spock.
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paulhartman4prez
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« Reply #11 on: March 31, 2012, 09:22:57 AM »

I used to have this really bad habit of getting drunk and asking girls to watch sci fi with me. Never has that ever worked.

i was just joking around at a party and asked a girl "wanna go back to my apartment, get high and watch star trek?" she said "engage." never in my life have i had a harder boner. found out later that she flicks the bean to spock.

That rules, yeah I totally blow it with that line all the time. At the point of me saying it, I'm embarrassingly drunk and it just comes off really bad.
Whatever, my cross to bare.
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Monty Burns
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« Reply #12 on: March 31, 2012, 09:36:53 AM »

hello.

that sums it up right there ....
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DaSk8D00D
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« Reply #13 on: March 31, 2012, 09:43:45 AM »

can i eat your snatch after nyjah unloads inside you lol

I feel bogish for actually laughing at this
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raunchyrick
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« Reply #14 on: March 31, 2012, 10:20:07 AM »

I told a girl she looked like Tina Fey.... she wasn't happy after that.

I also got real drunk and told a girl she had low self esteem in front of a bunch of people... yeah.

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Facehead
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« Reply #15 on: March 31, 2012, 10:37:43 AM »

Never call a chick 'dude'.
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BuddyPal
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« Reply #16 on: March 31, 2012, 10:43:23 AM »

this rag smell like chlorofoam, girl?

STOP RUNNING!!!!!

your dad doesn't own any guns, does he?
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oyolar
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« Reply #17 on: March 31, 2012, 11:29:45 AM »

I told a girl she looked like Tina Fey.... she wasn't happy after that.

I also got real drunk and told a girl she had low self esteem in front of a bunch of people... yeah.



First one--fuck that girl. Tina Fey is hot as shit.

+1 for the second one.
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commie
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« Reply #18 on: March 31, 2012, 11:58:13 AM »

Never call a chick 'dude'.

I call my gf "dude" all the time. She calls me "bro".
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Mr.Hamfist
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« Reply #19 on: March 31, 2012, 12:36:02 PM »

I was hanging out with this girl when I was 15 or so, just walking around and smoking. Everything was going well and she says she has to pee, okay whatever. So she goes to a liquor store around the corner and for some reason I don't go but about ten minutes passes so I go to see if she's alright and she's making out with her ex on a ledge outside the store. I was embarrassed and bummed and kinda just left.

obviously something i said didn't work...
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David
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« Reply #20 on: March 31, 2012, 12:40:28 PM »

Before I quit

Me, "Do you smoke?"

Her, "No."

END OF CONVERSATION.
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aWizard
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« Reply #21 on: March 31, 2012, 12:47:38 PM »

I was driving with two girls and we were stopped at a red light. I kinda look over and say "we should have a threesome." Exactly what I said. Threesome didn't happen but one of those girls is my gf of almost 2 years now.

(at parties) I used to just say "you wanna go somewhere else?"

« Last Edit: March 31, 2012, 01:16:08 PM by aWizard » Logged
I like my trucks between "loose" and "you're a faggot".
happenstance
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« Reply #22 on: March 31, 2012, 12:52:34 PM »

^I think you misread the thread title.

Usually when I tell women I sell furniture. That does it for me. This degree really isn't doing much for me.
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aWizard
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« Reply #23 on: March 31, 2012, 12:53:40 PM »

The thread title is "didn't quite work", which sometimes it didn't.
That's the only pick-up line I've ever used
I don't talk much, so I expect to get turned down more when the quiet guy comes out of nowhere and says "wanna fuck"
« Last Edit: March 31, 2012, 12:57:46 PM by aWizard » Logged
I like my trucks between "loose" and "you're a faggot".
happenstance
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« Reply #24 on: March 31, 2012, 12:57:48 PM »

I guess the point is that you don't brag about being smooth and the cool kid in school in a thread about blowing it with women. It is completely skirting the point of the thread and comes off as arrogant.
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aWizard
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« Reply #25 on: March 31, 2012, 01:02:17 PM »

*edited*

understandable

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I like my trucks between "loose" and "you're a faggot".
Pike St
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« Reply #26 on: March 31, 2012, 01:08:27 PM »

How much do you weigh? Are you on your period?
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raunchyrick
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« Reply #27 on: March 31, 2012, 01:30:09 PM »

talk about your ex, girls love that.
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pancake man
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« Reply #28 on: March 31, 2012, 01:44:28 PM »

I'm real hit or miss with "wanna make out?"
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layzieyez
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« Reply #29 on: March 31, 2012, 02:44:25 PM »

Where's the tits?
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I take everything I said back. The board hit me in the nuts for the first time ever today, because i was wearing these shits.
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