bangin' whores

[HATE!]

Speaking of elves...if they never age do they just come out of some elf vagina as an adult?  Do elf vaginas have snake-jaw like properties?  Just unhinge a few bones and out slides Liv Tyler?  Do we have any elven experts on the SLAP forums?  This shit keeps me up at night.

Holy shit, you just booked my whole day with important thoughts!

[brycickle]

i dont care how they get out of a vagina, but i sure as hell would like to know how to get into liv tylers magical portal of lust.

Start by being in an aerosmith video.

[Zurg]

I gave a persuasive speech about legalizing prostitution last Wednesday.

I believe it would be beneficial in many ways.

+Reducing the amount of disease spread by way of regulated testing

+Reducing physical abuse towards prostitutes

+Reducing human trafficking

etc etc.

Breaking the moral code of the people in charge is the only real 'problem' that would come out of legalization.

i think toronto just legalized prostitution to a degree or are on the verge of doing so. i think youre allowed to legally run a brothel now

[Monty Burns]

Why is it illegal anyways ?  If I want to sell my body to female super models who will pay tons of money to have sex with me . Who is the goverment to say no ?

I can kinda see why drugs are illegal , but I should be able to chop off my limbs , killmyself or sell myself for sex or to be beaten up if I wanted to ?

[HATE!]

Why is it illegal anyways ?  If I want to sell my body to female super models who will pay tons of money to have sex with me . Who is the goverment to say no ?

I can kinda see why drugs are illegal , but I should be able to chop off my limbs , killmyself or sell myself for sex or to be beaten up if I wanted to ?

Monty, you're not American.  In America, we like to take what we like, make it illegal, do it anyway, feel guilty about doing it privately so we publicly chastise it so we feel better about it.  You wouldn't understand.   

[Hercules Rockefeller]

you?re gods chosen country, so its okay i guess.

we love/hate you anyway.

[HATE!]

you?re gods chosen country, so its okay i guess.

we love/hate you anyway.

I know, without us you would have never been exposed to Wal-Mart.  You're welcome!

I am glad that you recognized our lord and saviour King Baby Jeebus as being an American though.  He's from Indiana and loves hamburgers, I think.

[daddy]

you?re gods chosen country, so its okay i guess.

we love/hate you anyway.

I know, without us you would have never been exposed to Wal-Mart.  You're welcome!

I am glad that you recognized our lord and saviour King Baby Jeebus as being an American though.  He's from Indiana and loves hamburgers, I think.

Oh yeah, this is jesus right?

[HATE!]

you?re gods chosen country, so its okay i guess.

we love/hate you anyway.

I know, without us you would have never been exposed to Wal-Mart.  You're welcome!

I am glad that you recognized our lord and saviour King Baby Jeebus as being an American though.  He's from Indiana and loves hamburgers, I think.

Oh yeah, this is jesus right?

The secret is out.  All will be known when his image is revealed on a burnt off brand poptart.

[Donkey Lips]

Never had a hooker experience.

Side question - didn't rawb tell a story about how prostitution is legal in some forms in Canada (and also how he tried to bang a prostitute in his parents basement)? Zurg might be right. I'm pretty sure they allow handjobs at massage parlors or something.

[meathead genius]

Bros, buying a bitch anything makes her a whore. I say, skip the time wasted buying dinner and buy a whore or rufes. You'll thank me later bros.

[Zurg]

i skimmed this and it kinda confused me more. im sure it explains it if you actually focus on the article though

http://www.thestar.com/news/ontario/article/1151925--prostitution-law-ontario-s-top-court-allows-brothels-but-soliciting-ruled-illegal

[David]

Never had a hooker experience.

Side question - didn't rawb tell a story about how prostitution is legal in some forms in Canada (and also how he tried to bang a prostitute in his parents basement)? Zurg might be right. I'm pretty sure they allow handjobs at massage parlors or something.

"Went down to the rub and tug." - Rawb

[oyolar]

Speaking of elves...if they never age do they just come out of some elf vagina as an adult?  Do elf vaginas have snake-jaw like properties?  Just unhinge a few bones and out slides Liv Tyler?  Do we have any elven experts on the SLAP forums?  This shit keeps me up at night.

Holy shit, you just booked my whole day with important thoughts!

Here you go: http://lotr.wikia.com/wiki/Elf_children

If you don't want to read, they age until they're mature (100 years old), then they stop.

[The Twilight Zone]

I imagine a whore's vagina would smell like a fresh bag of Doritos

[ice nine]

One of rawb's best was when he wrote about jerking his dick to 50 cent a minute live webcams.it was from the waist up because they were all trannys.

[grimcity]

It should be legal and regulated for sure, but as far as taking part... all I can think of is disease and talking money over sex.

Sex is just better when you work for it or luck out on it (imho).

[chockfullofthat]

Speaking of elves...if they never age do they just come out of some elf vagina as an adult?  Do elf vaginas have snake-jaw like properties?  Just unhinge a few bones and out slides Liv Tyler?  Do we have any elven experts on the SLAP forums?  This shit keeps me up at night.

Holy shit, you just booked my whole day with important thoughts!

Here you go: http://lotr.wikia.com/wiki/Elf_children

If you don't want to read, they age until they're mature (100 years old), then they stop.

I knew SLAP had to have a go to guy on elf lore.  It's you.  I was going to reward with a naked elf but I saw something pretty disturbing when I typed that into google images.  So now, NO ONE IS GETTING A REWARD!

[commie]

I just took a whole course on it. Exchange of sex for money is legal in Canada, but it is not legal to communicate for the purposes of prostitution or run a brothel. The Bedford case declared the brothel law unconstitutional, but it suspended the declaration of invalidity for one year to let the Parliament pass legislation on it.

[Mouth]

I used to live across the hallway from a flat full of thai hookers in Singapore. I'd be coming home late, barely able to stand, and they would invite me in to 'party' or better yet, try to invade my flat. Random Indian dudes there used to proposition my girlfriend and I for threesomes in the stairwells too.

Sometimes, we used to sit outside this infamous shopping centre called Orchard Towers AKA 'The Four Floors of Whores' drinking beers and shouting 'Dad, is that you?' at any 50ish white guys leaving with girls/ladyboys etc. Got some classic reactions.

Those were the days.

[lampshade]

No experience here. 

I always wondered, what is the difference between prostitution and making a porn.  What if you pick up a whore, bring her home, set up a video camera, make her say a few lines and get down to it.  No different than the majority of bang bros. or brazzers clips.  Do you need a license or something?  I can see the difference with 80's porn where they had costumes, sets, elaborate story lines, etc., but not today.

[oyolar]

No experience here. 

I always wondered, what is the difference between prostitution and making a porn.  What if you pick up a whore, bring her home, set up a video camera, make her say a few lines and get down to it.  No different than the majority of bang bros. or brazzers clips.  Do you need a license or something?  I can see the difference with 80's porn where they had costumes, sets, elaborate story lines, etc., but not today.

In pornography, the money is paid from a studio/company to both participants. Not person to person.

[layzieyez]

Male and female talent are both whores.

[Ronald Wilson Reagan]

I used to live across the hallway from a flat full of thai hookers in Singapore.

So this is how you met your investment banker wife!

[Hercules Rockefeller]

my flatmate had a beer with mick blue (you know him. trust me.) at a skatevideo premiere here in austria. apparently he likes skateboarding a lot, even though he doesnt do it. thats my take on that.

[Numeral]

my boss asked me that on a business trip, like where can I find the best girls in town.
at first I was like fuck off, then I was like oh yeah I'm gonna take a shit on that corporate amex and you gonna pay nikka!!

got the guy totally wasted left him at a bar with the amex charged to hell and a card with his hotel address, all around win.
he couldn't get it on and I got a free dinner for every chick there plus drinks.

[doomstation55]

No experience here. 

I always wondered, what is the difference between prostitution and making a porn.  What if you pick up a whore, bring her home, set up a video camera, make her say a few lines and get down to it.  No different than the majority of bang bros. or brazzers clips.  Do you need a license or something?  I can see the difference with 80's porn where they had costumes, sets, elaborate story lines, etc., but not today.

This is the best idea since starting a skate sunglasses company