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Author Topic: real confessions  (Read 424908 times)
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DaSk8D00D
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« Reply #3330 on: February 20, 2012, 01:13:11 PM »

I get nervous around groups of people. Even in class if i have to say something aloud its hard for me.    Skateboarding is the only thing that keeps me sane       Ive never had a real girlfriend (im 17)      I constantly think ill regret anything im doing

you read some david deangelo shit. man transformation & shit like that. forreal i been readin/watchin that shit myself & it really helps you look at shit differently & start to build your self-confidence. you can find the audiobooks & videos on thepiratebay. i aint even talkin about the dating stuff im talkin bout that inner game.
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GarglesCmen
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« Reply #3331 on: February 20, 2012, 01:47:06 PM »

I get nervous around groups of people. Even in class if i have to say something aloud its hard for me.    Skateboarding is the only thing that keeps me sane       Ive never had a real girlfriend (im 17)      I constantly think ill regret anything im doing

I know these all too well, it is just something you grow out of. For me, everything just clicked one day, I just stopped caring to a certain extent. I don't know what I did though to overcome there thought processes though.
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« Reply #3332 on: February 21, 2012, 12:20:53 PM »

How do i say it without being to blatantly obvious? how do i frame this in a way where i dont come off as creepy or dissillusioned, but confident and hopeful.  why do i feel the way i do? it?s a familiar feeling but everything around me seems so new. full of opportunity, ready for me to take it, and i can fucking have it if i want it. how do i know i want it? how do i know that this feeling deep within me wont pass after a few days? sure everyone has a good weekend from time to time, giving them a helpful boost into the week, only to succumb to the monotony they are all too used to by thursday.  well it?s only tuesday and i know that this feeling wont change. even if everything around me changes, the feeling i have inside can not. for once in my life i feel stumped, challenged, intrigued, happy, optimistic, and purposeful.  I?m energetic, active, and when i awake in the morning, I?m actually awake.  Even last weekend, hungover as hell from the seemingly countless nights of drinking before, I found myself jumping out of bed every morning feeling a new.  maybe it was the sunlight, or maybe i was just letting the light in for once.  I know there is no inevitable slump in the days to come, not this time.  Im invigorated like never before, a change in the trajectory of my life forever. and she?s only 19
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Turtle Boy
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« Reply #3333 on: February 23, 2012, 12:19:14 AM »

The first time I bought real skate shoes I had to decide between DVS Berra 1 in navy and DVS Getz 1 in white/maroon because those were the cheapest on sale for my size at the time.
I had big issues to decide wether I should buy the Berra's or the Getz. I thought the Getz were better looking than the berras, but the berras had airbags, and I've never had shoes with airbags at the time.

I finally purchased the Berras, and I still regret it to this day.
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« Reply #3334 on: February 23, 2012, 07:21:51 AM »

The first time I bought real skate shoes I had to decide between DVS Berra 1 in navy and DVS Getz 1 in white/maroon because those were the cheapest on sale for my size at the time.
I had big issues to decide wether I should buy the Berra's or the Getz. I thought the Getz were better looking than the berras, but the berras had airbags, and I've never had shoes with airbags at the time.

I finally purchased the Berras, and I still regret it to this day.
You're fucked up.

I get nervous around groups of people. Even in class if i have to say something aloud its hard for me.    Skateboarding is the only thing that keeps me sane
Reading your post made me realize that I get nervous around groups of people too except I get nervous around large groups of black people and large groups of old white people.
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DaSk8D00D
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« Reply #3335 on: February 24, 2012, 10:29:50 PM »

lately i be feelin like im on slap too much. i mean, its a cool way to kill time but a nigga be killin TOO much time nahmean? i guess that aint even the real problem its more because i smoke hella weed at night n get bored or im easily distracted. didnt smoke any weed today so i guess ima try to go sober for a while. i BEEN tryna do this shit but you know, shit happens. i wanna go at least a month or somethin, just to see how much more productive i can be. real talk im tryna do somethin with this rap shit and i gotta lil fanbase supportin me n whatnot but i be lazy as fuck all the time. ive been skipping school (college classes that require financial aid) to work on my music & i dont even be doin that much anyway, and sometimes i just sleep in & play gta 4 or some shit for the rest of the day. i think its just the weed man. i be on that good ya know? purple widow, chocolate velvet, strawberry cough...all that shit, just about every day and i think ive just formed certain habits and tendencies that're currently holding me back from my true potential. real talk i be tryna get on that young renaissance man shit, but my minds always cloudy and i be too apathetic. nigga my mom bout to shit a brick when she find out i been skippin class and she already be hastlin me about my grades n shit. she already know i dont plan on following up after this semester but nigga i feel like i quit college weeks ago. i dunno breh im just venting. i gotta work 10 hours tomorrow & gotta wake up at 6, thats shits kinda whack but im used to it now. i also wanna work on my conversation skills. like, dont get me wrong ima pretty social dude, but i wanna be a master of conversation. like, just being able to talk to people i dont know easy as fuck. plus thatll help me with tha ladies as well. im tired of these side-bitches and i wanna settle down with a down ass chick, but at the same time i feel like i gotta get on top of my game before i even go for that shit ya know? i gotta couple prospects in mind and i feel like if i can initiate that shit the right way i can handle it from there. i also wanna get on my seduction shit as well. again, dont get me wrong a nigga got moderate success but i want MORE. i wanna be able to just pull a bitch nahmean?  anyways, like i said im just venting and typing whatever first comes to mind. shit id like to learn how to type really fast with perfect punctuation n shit but naw i self-taught myself through AIM back in junior high so unless im typing an essay that shit just aint happening. fuck it man ima wrap this shit up. hope the good people out there have something to say and may all my haters get a little joy from seeing the softer side of DaSk8d00d. peace out to the real niggas and fuck all you stans on SLAP steady tryna test me. yall kinda entertaining to me but at the same time your frequent fuckery gets annoying and i be too thirsty to finish these cyber-arguments. aight im done tho.
« Last Edit: February 24, 2012, 11:16:45 PM by DaSk8D00D » Logged
clamy
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« Reply #3336 on: February 24, 2012, 10:41:48 PM »

^i hear ya about being on slap too much. i've been injured for a long time so i don't feel that bad about it, but it's still depressing. i quit drinking so i could heal faster but it just makes the time go even slower.
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« Reply #3337 on: February 25, 2012, 12:22:30 AM »

SK8DOOD, there was some stuff I was gonna say about smoking weed and GPA's and other things, but instead I'll post this link... just because.

http://www.google.com/#hl=en&safe=off&sclient=psy-ab&q=you%20live%20in%20your%20mind&pbx=1&oq=&aq=&aqi=&aql=&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_qf.,cf.osb&fp=5216fb621a058d8f&biw=1006&bih=480&pf=p&pdl=500






'Perfect equilibrium in human nature is seldom found; in fact, it is Nature's greatest rarity.'


« Last Edit: February 25, 2012, 12:33:25 AM by David » Logged
DaSk8D00D
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« Reply #3338 on: February 25, 2012, 12:45:44 AM »

SK8DOOD, there was some stuff I was gonna say about smoking weed and GPA's and other things, but instead I'll post this link... just because.

http://www.google.com/#hl=en&safe=off&sclient=psy-ab&q=you%20live%20in%20your%20mind&pbx=1&oq=&aq=&aqi=&aql=&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_qf.,cf.osb&fp=5216fb621a058d8f&biw=1006&bih=480&pf=p&pdl=500





'Perfect equilibrium in human nature is seldom found; in fact, it is Nature's greatest rarity.'





yeah i can relate to that. theres alot of things i "simulate" in my life. im actually watching this self-help seminar right now talking about the same thing. as far as the weed shit i fucking love the kush. i really do. that shit is natures medicine, but everything's good in moderation ya know? ive been more on the excessive side and over a long period of time the accumulative effects have gotten hold of me. i realized earlier today that it might even sub-consciously give me an excuse to be lazy, or to do certain things. like i said ive tried to stop before but the shits all around. pretty much all my friends smoke & even close members of my family smoke, so even when i try to stop i somehow get dragged into the shit. i mean, i know that nobodys MAKING me smoke and that its really up to me and my own self-discipline but shit man its gets very tempting when im with tha homies at the park and they pull out a blunt, or when a fine ass girl hits me up just to smoke me out for free or some shit. its like i try to avoid it but its always there
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« Reply #3339 on: February 25, 2012, 02:22:32 AM »

how fucking cool is getting drunk, i mean holy shit, gotta be pretty fucking up there
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vince the stud
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« Reply #3340 on: February 25, 2012, 04:43:38 AM »

i never pee standing at home




how's that for a fucking confessions ?
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« Reply #3341 on: February 26, 2012, 11:55:41 PM »

I may just have one of the worst real confessions. Please try hard not to hate me.

A small, but undeniable part of me, thinks Mr. Cheese is humorous. I giggle sometimes.

Having said that, I still wish he'd stop, because I think he's encouraging lame and lazy posting from others, lowering the bar as it were, and the small giggles I get aren't worth it.

 
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« Reply #3342 on: February 27, 2012, 06:12:01 AM »

i never pee standing at home




how's that for a fucking confessions ?



I stopped peeing standing up after the first time my mum force to clean the bathroom.

"Son, from now on you'll do this weekly..."
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ShadowKhaN
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« Reply #3343 on: February 27, 2012, 03:35:25 PM »



[/quote]That was interesting.

Ive been having a really hard time, getting these Dissociative feelings, feelings of having no identity and mood swings all the time. I feel unable to connect to my emotions (except for anxiety) and thus cant connect with other people. I hope its just my traumatic childhood pushing through and I can still work on it and be happy one day. I just need hope.
[/quote]


Ive had that feeling twice and it lasted about a week for me. The feeling is called depersonalization. It is most likely the after effect of your panic attacks. We have a thing called emotional coloring to everything we sad. (the reason why things look familiar and can make you feel happy/sad/whatever) When you panic your brain nullifies itself to keep you stable and your emotional coloring is nulled in the process, leaving you feeling disassociated.

Its a tough process and can feel terrifying but understand that it is only temporary. One good thing to think is is that the feeling can be extremely beneficial. The ability to temporary perceive everything a little bit outside of your normal ways of thinking can be an amazing tool 
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ShadowKhaN
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« Reply #3344 on: February 27, 2012, 04:47:25 PM »

All about that balance bro
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finknoos
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« Reply #3345 on: February 28, 2012, 03:55:49 AM »

I think im about to get myself a girlfriend.. I've been hanging out with this chick for several months now, and shit is getting real. Its both wonderful and fucking scary. Why you say? Because I fear that I wont be able to smoke as much weed and skate as much as I want to. Fuck. Maybe I should grow up? Or maybe not? Damnit

growing up is an illusion, it can be done but its pointless. its best to handle your responsibilities effectivley but keep the mindset of a child where anything can be fun and everyday is an adventure.
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finknoos
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« Reply #3346 on: February 28, 2012, 05:13:04 AM »

I think im about to get myself a girlfriend.. I've been hanging out with this chick for several months now, and shit is getting real. Its both wonderful and fucking scary. Why you say? Because I fear that I wont be able to smoke as much weed and skate as much as I want to. Fuck. Maybe I should grow up? Or maybe not? Damnit

growing up is an illusion, it can be done but its pointless. its best to handle your responsibilities effectivley but keep the mindset of a child where anything can be fun and everyday is an adventure.

Yeah, I guess you're right!
I got friends the same age as me(24) whos got their own house, kids and all that grown up shit. And of course a bad ass mortgage loan. Sure they got a family, and thats nice.. But those dudes arent having fun at all, if you know what I mean. They have all quit doing shit they used to, and are only doing grown up shit.
Im baked, and dont know where the fuck Im going with this, but I guess what Im trying to say is that you have to keep doing shit that make you happy(in my case, skateboarding, weed and brews) even if you have responsibilities. And Im guessing that the reason for me being kinda scared of having a girlfriend and shit is because Im afraid of losing those things

Then make sure to find a girlfriend whos down for the cause.

much easier said than done but from what ive seen, life is so much easier when your girlfriend understands what you do any why you do it.

get a girl who likes you as a whole, not one who likes aspects of you and wants to tweak and change you to how she wants.
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« Reply #3347 on: February 28, 2012, 06:21:09 AM »

i'm sneaking around with a mother of 2, who's engaged.
at least she's hot...
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« Reply #3348 on: February 28, 2012, 07:21:01 AM »

i'm sneaking around with a mother of 2, who's engaged.
at least she's hot...

hi 5!!
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« Reply #3349 on: February 28, 2012, 10:46:33 AM »

i also wanna work on my conversation skills. like, dont get me wrong ima pretty social dude, but i wanna be a master of conversation.

I suggest you start with that: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cooperative_principle
also, you should focus on the maxim of quantity
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« Reply #3350 on: February 28, 2012, 11:49:06 AM »

I know exactly where I am in life, I have no idea where I will be, and that?s not only ok with me, it?s comforting.  We can?t last forever, no part of us can. whether it?s our physical bodies, our moods, our psyches, nothing is constant.  Change is inevitable, and it?s how we deal with it that gives us our perceived happiness.  I?m extremely close with two types people that couldn't be further from each other.  The young and hopeful, and the old and suicidal.  And they both have beautiful things to offer the world, they are inspiring, they are honest with themselves, they are pure, and they are true. though initially they may be put on this world for a similar purpose, as the young becomes old, and the hopeful suicidal, perspectives change.  The old and suicidal are eventually shown that there is nothing to live for, yet they still live.  But why are these lonely, desperate people seen walking around everyday?  going outside for a walk in the park and for a good part of the day, these people are laughing!  the old and suicidal have a want to help others, and more or less consciously, they do.  The old and suicidal will move heaven and earth to help the ones they love, if there are even any left among them.  the young and hopeful learn from the old and suicidal whether they know it or not.  boundless energy, bright eyes, large smiles, this is the makeup of the young and hopeful. open to new opportunities, being led by their souls wherever they go, the young and hopeful are what lights up the world. But when direction is needed, they turn to the old and suicidal for guidance;  Guidance in the form of a talk, in the form of observation, in the form of being humbled.  The young and hopeful need something to think about constantly, and this can often be overwhelming. but just as a sponge absorbs water, sometimes the minds of the young and hopeful can?t help but get dirty.  This dirt, this sediment, is what begins the transformation of the young and hopeful into the old and suicidal.  I find myself somewhere in between, often jumping back and forth, eventually residing in the harrowing grey area that lays between.  Therefore I have no current labels for what or who I am. am I the old and hopeful? the young and suicidal? I know people on both ends of the spectrum. Where do i fit in? Am I supposed to know? Maybe I can be young and hopeful until old age.  Knowing the path of the old and suicidal can let me know when to take a left turn. Growing old but never up, still unaware of where i?ll be, just the way I?d want it.
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« Reply #3351 on: February 28, 2012, 12:53:59 PM »



That was interesting.

Ive been having a really hard time, getting these Dissociative feelings, feelings of having no identity and mood swings all the time. I feel unable to connect to my emotions (except for anxiety) and thus cant connect with other people. I hope its just my traumatic childhood pushing through and I can still work on it and be happy one day. I just need hope.
[/quote]


Ive had that feeling twice and it lasted about a week for me. The feeling is called depersonalization. It is most likely the after effect of your panic attacks. We have a thing called emotional coloring to everything we sad. (the reason why things look familiar and can make you feel happy/sad/whatever) When you panic your brain nullifies itself to keep you stable and your emotional coloring is nulled in the process, leaving you feeling disassociated.

Its a tough process and can feel terrifying but understand that it is only temporary. One good thing to think is is that the feeling can be extremely beneficial. The ability to temporary perceive everything a little bit outside of your normal ways of thinking can be an amazing tool 
[/quote]Yeah, that lasted for a little over a week, some of the worst times ever!

Im pretty good now, although I still have a lot to work with.
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« Reply #3352 on: February 28, 2012, 02:29:32 PM »

usually the anxiety has a trigger to it. Mine is weed :/ smoked everyday for 2 years no problem and the bam smoked and i feel like im having a heart attack. Now i cant even smoke unless I drink first and anything that has to do with the human heart makes me spazz out. So stupid I still can not get over it
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« Reply #3353 on: February 28, 2012, 03:03:49 PM »

usually the anxiety has a trigger to it. Mine is weed :/ smoked everyday for 2 years no problem and the bam smoked and i feel like im having a heart attack. Now i cant even smoke unless I drink first and anything that has to do with the human heart makes me spazz out. So stupid I still can not get over it
Yeah, I know what you mean and weed has caused me to have horrible panic attacks and dissociation episodes. Now I can pretty much control it and only feel a little funky for the first 15 minutes if Ive smoked a lot. I dont smoke too often or that much at a time though and Im not sure if I should be smoking at all (pussy! Smiley)

Thanks for the info
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DaSk8D00D
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« Reply #3354 on: February 28, 2012, 04:42:50 PM »

i also wanna work on my conversation skills. like, dont get me wrong ima pretty social dude, but i wanna be a master of conversation.

I suggest you start with that: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cooperative_principle
also, you should focus on the maxim of quantity


 "Do not make your contribution more informative than is required." LOL i know, i know... thanks man im reading this shit right now looks good. im gonna try to remember these maxims cuz ive had similar thoughts on how good conversation "works" so these really put it in a more understandable perspective.
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vince the stud
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« Reply #3355 on: February 28, 2012, 07:33:04 PM »

I think im about to get myself a girlfriend.. I've been hanging out with this chick for several months now, and shit is getting real. Its both wonderful and fucking scary. Why you say? Because I fear that I wont be able to smoke as much weed and skate as much as I want to. Fuck. Maybe I should grow up? Or maybe not? Damnit


growing up is an illusion, it can be done but its pointless. its best to handle your responsibilities effectivley but keep the mindset of a child where anything can be fun and everyday is an adventure.


Yeah, I guess you're right!
I got friends the same age as me(24) whos got their own house, kids and all that grown up shit. And of course a bad ass mortgage loan. Sure they got a family, and thats nice.. But those dudes arent having fun at all, if you know what I mean. They have all quit doing shit they used to, and are only doing grown up shit.
Im baked, and dont know where the fuck Im going with this, but I guess what Im trying to say is that you have to keep doing shit that make you happy(in my case, skateboarding, weed and brews) even if you have responsibilities. And Im guessing that the reason for me being kinda scared of having a girlfriend and shit is because Im afraid of losing those things


Then make sure to find a girlfriend whos down for the cause.

much easier said than done but from what ive seen, life is so much easier when your girlfriend understands what you do any why you do it.

get a girl who likes you as a whole, not one who likes aspects of you and wants to tweak and change you to how she wants.


Yeah.. Shes stoked about the skateboarding part, not to sure if shes down for the weed part. :p whatever. as long as I can skate its alright I guess
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« Reply #3356 on: February 28, 2012, 08:14:12 PM »

When girls jerk me off with both hands its an ego boost.
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« Reply #3357 on: February 28, 2012, 08:29:32 PM »

all you fucking assholes who claim you have social anxiety and all this bullshit you need to stop being such fucking pussies and be men!
i'm sure someones going to come back at me because of my last post but god damnit... to other people, your social anxiety just comes off as pretentious and petty. trust me i know from experience a lot more people have not liked me because i was all closed off. but when i just act all goofy and don't really give a shit what people think about me, they love me. maybe to them my company is more entertainment than anything but i'd rather be a jester than a god damned fool.
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« Reply #3358 on: February 28, 2012, 08:30:27 PM »

so quit being fucking dumb and insecure. fucking teenage hormones. fuck, that shits for the birds.
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« Reply #3359 on: February 29, 2012, 12:19:53 PM »

Insecure people probably see others 'loving it' when some dude is being a 'jester'.then they think to themselves, wow these people like this fucking goof, I want nothing to do with them.then they feel bummed and lonely later.
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