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General Discussion => WHATEVER => Topic started by: DaSk8D00D on March 30, 2012, 10:34:19 PM
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Just gonna get this shit started before i goto bed.
for me i'd been hittin on this one girl back in my junior year in high school. she was pretty much my dream bitch. anyway she was feelin me as well but she had a long-term boyfriend who also happened to play basketball for Bradley,so the younger version of me thinkin like "i barely have a chance". anyway one day we were talkin and she basically had asked me out. cant remember exactly what she said, but it was somewhat indirect and i thought it was just a joke so i (again, the YOUNGER version of me) said some shit like "naw b you needa step ya game up first" just on some playful shit cuz we'd always joke around with eachother n whatnot. low and behold this bitch was DEAD ASS SERIOUS and got mad as fuck, went n told all her other friends RIGHT AFTERWARDS and i had to deal with a bunch of black girls callin me "bogish, mean, blah blah blah" for about a week. long story short we was still cool afterwards but the romance was totally gone, and i had lost mostly all chances to wife up a bad bitch. I had to take the L that day, and my frustrated teenage heart ached for about a month.
anyways, tell yo own lil stories n whatnot, i know a few of yall got some gems....
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hello.
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"wanna make out?"
"look at this girl, she would be perfect for a threesome"
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This shit happened last weekend. I'm really stoked and bummed at the same time, cause she was probably a keeper.
I was talking to this girl for 5 minutes or so when a club closed, and without me remembering what the hell happened before she said "I'm not taking you home tonight, but we can get together tomorrow"
My answer was "Nah, I'm dead broke tomorrow"..
What a dumbass ???
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howdy darlin, how about i bend you over a barrel and show you the whole 50 states
oh wait that works every fucking time.
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I was talking to this girl for 5 minutes or so when a club closed, and without me remembering what the hell happened before she said "I'm not taking you home tonight, but we can get together tomorrow"
My answer was "Nah, I'm dead broke tomorrow"..
What a dumbass ???
Too late to be drinking coffee (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmMna1EwZ1E#)
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I used to have this really bad habit of getting drunk and asking girls to watch sci fi with me. Never has that ever worked.
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"your face, i like that shit"
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Not saying anything at all.
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can i eat your snatch after nyjah unloads inside you lol
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I used to have this really bad habit of getting drunk and asking girls to watch sci fi with me. Never has that ever worked.
i was just joking around at a party and asked a girl "wanna go back to my apartment, get high and watch star trek?" she said "engage." never in my life have i had a harder boner. found out later that she flicks the bean to spock.
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I used to have this really bad habit of getting drunk and asking girls to watch sci fi with me. Never has that ever worked.
i was just joking around at a party and asked a girl "wanna go back to my apartment, get high and watch star trek?" she said "engage." never in my life have i had a harder boner. found out later that she flicks the bean to spock.
That rules, yeah I totally blow it with that line all the time. At the point of me saying it, I'm embarrassingly drunk and it just comes off really bad.
Whatever, my cross to bare.
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hello.
that sums it up right there ....
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can i eat your snatch after nyjah unloads inside you lol
I feel bogish for actually laughing at this
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I told a girl she looked like Tina Fey.... she wasn't happy after that.
I also got real drunk and told a girl she had low self esteem in front of a bunch of people... yeah.
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Never call a chick 'dude'.
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this rag smell like chlorofoam, girl?
STOP RUNNING!!!!!
your dad doesn't own any guns, does he?
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I told a girl she looked like Tina Fey.... she wasn't happy after that.
I also got real drunk and told a girl she had low self esteem in front of a bunch of people... yeah.
First one--fuck that girl. Tina Fey is hot as shit.
+1 for the second one.
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Never call a chick 'dude'.
I call my gf "dude" all the time. She calls me "bro".
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I was hanging out with this girl when I was 15 or so, just walking around and smoking. Everything was going well and she says she has to pee, okay whatever. So she goes to a liquor store around the corner and for some reason I don't go but about ten minutes passes so I go to see if she's alright and she's making out with her ex on a ledge outside the store. I was embarrassed and bummed and kinda just left.
obviously something i said didn't work...
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Before I quit
Me, "Do you smoke?"
Her, "No."
END OF CONVERSATION.
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I was driving with two girls and we were stopped at a red light. I kinda look over and say "we should have a threesome." Exactly what I said. Threesome didn't happen but one of those girls is my gf of almost 2 years now.
(at parties) I used to just say "you wanna go somewhere else?"
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^I think you misread the thread title.
Usually when I tell women I sell furniture. That does it for me. This degree really isn't doing much for me.
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The thread title is "didn't quite work", which sometimes it didn't.
That's the only pick-up line I've ever used
I don't talk much, so I expect to get turned down more when the quiet guy comes out of nowhere and says "wanna fuck"
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I guess the point is that you don't brag about being smooth and the cool kid in school in a thread about blowing it with women. It is completely skirting the point of the thread and comes off as arrogant.
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*edited*
understandable
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How much do you weigh? Are you on your period?
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talk about your ex, girls love that.
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I'm real hit or miss with "wanna make out?"
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Where's the tits?
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My mouth gets in the way of my dick more often than not. Once a girl asked me to talk dirty to her which i dont ever, ever like to do. And I uttered "I want to fuck every hole in your body"...didn't get past the first one. Another time in Vegas I was fornicating with the nice women who trains the Dolphins at the Mirage and I was blackout drunk randomly talking during sex. I sometimes feel it eases up the tension, and I still don't know what I was talking about leading up to it and ended it with ......"but im fucking you instead." she rolled over and I asked what way to start walking.
On the bright side, I had just finshed having sex with a girl for the first time and after, she found a full potato chip in my bed and asked why it was there, and I replied "you just got Frito-Laid". She told me about a month later, after that dumbass comment, she knew I was a good guy and she wanted me around more. I had sex with her best friend about a month after.
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I know me & you have had our differences but i must admit the Frito-Laid line is definitely worth stealing
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do you like dragons or down with anal usually does the trick
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At a party last night, there was a girl painted completely blue, turned out she was supposed to be an indian goddess or some shit. Asked her if she had a blue waffle as well. When asked what that would be, i googled it on my phone en showed it to her. she wasn't too excited about it. Here's a picture of my friend trying to steal her drink:
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/s720x720/544833_10150757781205973_545490972_11714456_186955528_n.jpg)
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I know me & you have had our differences but i must admit the Frito-Laid line is definitely worth stealing
We have no differnces, I'm sure you're a good dude, just a shitty poster.
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I know me & you have had our differences but i must admit the Frito-Laid line is definitely worth stealing
you guys are fuckin' cute
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I used to have this really bad habit of getting drunk and asking girls to watch sci fi with me. Never has that ever worked.
i was just joking around at a party and asked a girl "wanna go back to my apartment, get high and watch star trek?" she said "engage." never in my life have i had a harder boner. found out later that she flicks the bean to spock.
i decided recently that i will make sure i ask every girl i hang out with to "get high and watch porn". if they say no then its on to the next one. the ones who say yes are pretty fucking good in the sack and ive actually never watched porn with any of them still. its a good test though.
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- Girl, your eyebrows are making me seriously hungry for McDonald's right now. Those are some amazing arches.
- I bet you'd be really good at playing hot potato because you sure know how to drop it like it's hot.
- Watch girl come out of the bathroom. Girl stands beside you at bar. Say, "I know what you did in there".
- You're in it to win it. You've already got here in your arms and it's a slow dance. Whisper, "I want to go jihad on your vagina".
- Tell her your old girlfriends used to call you Jesus because there was never a second coming. No...wait...
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"you just got Frito-Laid".
you're my hero.
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Not me, but when i was like 15 some guy asked my good girl friend (who i went on the pork) this
'Do you ever want to get married?'
'Er, I dont know...'
'Well I know how I can tell' *Leans in for a kiss*
She got up, walked off and lost her virginity to his best friend under a tree.
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Swallow bitch, there's people starving in Africa.
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"I can smell your teeth from across the room"
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I know me & you have had our differences but i must admit the Frito-Laid line is definitely worth stealing
you guys are fuckin' cute
you can tell he really brought his A-game with that perfectly executed neg.
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Before I quit
Me, "Do you smoke?"
Her, "No."
END OF CONVERSATION.
haha. fuck.
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sooo umm, like what music do you like and stuff?
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Since im married it sounds like this.
Can you help me with this?
In a bit.
Can you do this now?
In a while.
can you get your lazy ass off the couch?
can you stop nagging.
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When i first getting started on my tattoo collection, drinking pretty heavy and generally not giving shits
"10 bucks says i look better naked than you do."
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"yo baby, got any money?"
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"What do I do for fun? I dunno I like to go on skateboarding websites and stuff."
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To my disappointment "What's your interests, uh? Who you be with?" didn't work.
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Did you ask her what things make her smile? Or what numbers to dial? Cause it's sort of a package deal with those questions.
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chatting with her on facebook and said: what are you wearing right now? ;). She was like WHAT?
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"yo girl i'm just tryin to get some stinky on my hang low."
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A friend of mine convinced someone to stick his dick under a faucet when this girl was out of the room. When she came back she asked what he was doing he said, "im just trying to get my dick wet". She ran out of the house.