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Skateboarding => USELESS WOODEN TOY BANTER => Topic started by: Larry on May 25, 2018, 04:59:23 AM
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not talking about your own belongings.
I just accidentally shattered this huge windowpanel on some office building after my board slipped from me. Weird part was that there was some employees in the building who saw it but after a minute of on-off panicing we just bounced without any consequences
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cpo1KFhXosA
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That was you? We called the cops and were waiting for them to turn up!
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my skateboards
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We used to skate on a sculpture by Henry Moore. Apparently it was worth millions and we were happily grinding and sliding all over it. Good times.
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ripped some marble stairs out from "abandoned" city building and made them into ledges, turns out the city was about to do a reconstruction and suits are now bummed that we thrashed the place
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busted out a window skating a ledge at this yoga studio, ran away but they had cameras, $250 worth of damage
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We used to skate on a sculpture by Henry Moore. Apparently it was worth millions and we were happily grinding and sliding all over it. Good times.
mouth, I'm pretty sure Moore would've been overjoyed at you skating his work.
when I was 15 I was skating in the combat zone in Boston alone late night and my board shot out and hit a hooker in the ankle. according to the pimp who choked me out I damaged expensive goods since he saw her as a commodity. the sex worker was cool AF and talked him out of smashing my map and/or taking what little money I had on me. she thought I was a runaway and actually explained how to be a boy sex worker and stay safe and I would see her all the time when I was out skating. but I always felt bad about hurting her ankle.
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We used to skate on a sculpture by Henry Moore. Apparently it was worth millions and we were happily grinding and sliding all over it. Good times.
mouth, I'm pretty sure Moore would've been overjoyed at you skating his work.
when I was 15 I was skating in the combat zone in Boston alone late night and my board shot out and hit a hooker in the ankle. according to the pimp who choked me out I damaged expensive goods since he saw her as a commodity. the sex worker was cool AF and talked him out of smashing my map and/or taking what little money I had on me. she thought I was a runaway and actually explained how to be a boy sex worker and stay safe and I would see her all the time when I was out skating. but I always felt bad about hurting her ankle.
shoulda smashed and paid extra for the inconvenience
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Can I consider my own wrist property? Because destroying that necessitated two surgeries which ended up being pretty fucking expensive.
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4 donor ACLs. People died. You can’t put a price on that
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We used to skate on a sculpture by Henry Moore. Apparently it was worth millions and we were happily grinding and sliding all over it. Good times.
If skating a sculpture counts, than everybody who has ever skated in Chicago's answer should probably be the Picasso. Picasso sculptures are pretty valuable, especially 50 foot tall iconic ones.
One time while we were skating it I asked a friend if Picasso would be stoked or bummed on us skating his sculpture. His response was "Who fucking cares? He's dead"
Cops always love telling tales about how you are destroying something expensive. "The city spent $800,000 fixing these benches last year because of you punks!"
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^ yeah I was gonna say, literally everything is magically worth six figures when it comes to skateboarding on it
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i like knowing that my tax money is going to the city for fixing ledges that skaters fucked up so we can skate them in better condition
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nothing too crazy. mostly just wallriding where I shouldn't. nothing a can of paint can't fix. this recent one was at a multi million dollar house. I'd been eyeing it up for a while. Other people had skated it; but it got repainted. I did not want to be that "first mark" guy. So i waited. But kept driving by to check on it. Then I saw another clip on it and went by and saw some fresh marks. My homie that I normally film with didn't want anything to do with it. Scaredy cat. Everyone has to draw their own line I guess. So I went there with another buddy to film it. I drove past a couple weeks later to see if it had been repainted. Not only was it painted; they put a palm tree in the grass gap there; so the spot is done.
(https://i.imgur.com/hxexJ7nl.jpg)
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Universitat ledges, 2007. Random tuesday night around february undercover cop gave me a 2.100eur ticket for damaging the thing. Total bummer
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There’s a sick Russian war memorial that’s like a bank and I skate that when no ones around. There’s a lot of Russians in my neighborhood and have these memorials at this park and get pissy if you skate them .
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church down the street from me has a huge 2 flat 2 plenty of space to land just you are going to skid when hitting grass..... anyways there was a faux marble ledge that did slide for ts and ns however I was recently learning backside lipslides crushed the faux marble bench ledge shit and bounced shorty there after. haven't been back since.
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nothing too crazy. mostly just wallriding where I shouldn't. nothing a can of paint can't fix. this recent one was at a multi million dollar house. I'd been eyeing it up for a while. Other people had skated it; but it got repainted. I did not want to be that "first mark" guy. So i waited. But kept driving by to check on it. Then I saw another clip on it and went by and saw some fresh marks. My homie that I normally film with didn't want anything to do with it. Scaredy cat. Everyone has to draw their own line I guess. So I went there with another buddy to film it. I drove past a couple weeks later to see if it had been repainted. Not only was it painted; they put a palm tree in the grass gap there; so the spot is done.
(https://i.imgur.com/hxexJ7nl.jpg)
Could have always repainted it for them ;) might have bought the spot some time.
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are we talking only while riding the board, or does the whole skate trip count? I grew up in south florida. Property destruction and fun were synonymous. And being 16-18 driving around at night with in a car full of homies who felt the same was usually a recipe for damage.
few good ones:
We stole trusses for a roof being built on a nearby house. Cops came by later on, but they didn't have enough evidence and couldn't prove where we got the trusses from. It was just a giant wood triangle. Sucked to skate and we trashed it.
On the way home after late night session we would stop by this huge mall called sawgrass mills. someone would hang out of the car holding a shopping cart and we would just drive like 40 mph and then let go of the shopping cart. Massive destruction. One time we destroyed some kind of storage shed full of inventory. Blasted it with a cart and it exploded.
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Broke a window once by mistake. Also used to skate this multi-million dollar historical landmark thing and one of my homies broke a big chunk from it. It was like this super polished marble shit. Nobody was around in either of those instances so we just left calmly.
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was skating some big bronze statue the other day when this caricature of an artist ran up, he was all in black with black frame glasses and a little beard stubble and he was freaking out, yelling at me for jumping on the art. I apologized and said I understood his concern for me potentially damaging the thing (been trying to take the path of least resistance lately in confrontations) and this fool tells me no, he doesn't actually care about the damage, he doesn't even like this piece, but what is upsetting him is my lack of respect for the art, apparently I am not giving the art the proper respect it deserves. It sounds conceited to say I destroyed this dude in a quick back-and-forth over the validity of performance as social critique and the dynamics governing audience behaviour when it comes to public art in general, but really he had no chance, since he was relying on status rather than logic, and my arguments are the product of decades long consideration, born out of frustration and necessity.
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was skating some big bronze statue the other day when this caricature of an artist ran up, he was all in black with black frame glasses and a little beard stubble and he was freaking out, yelling at me for jumping on the art. I apologized and said I understood his concern for me potentially damaging the thing (been trying to take the path of least resistance lately in confrontations) and this fool tells me no, he doesn't actually care about the damage, he doesn't even like this piece, but what is upsetting him is my lack of respect for the art, apparently I am not giving the art the proper respect it deserves. It sounds conceited to say I destroyed this dude in a quick back-and-forth over the validity of performance as social critique and the dynamics governing audience behaviour when it comes to public art in general, but really he had no chance, since he was relying on status rather than logic, and my arguments are the product of decades long consideration, born out of frustration and necessity.
(https://s33.postimg.cc/wu96xzftb/Nice_to_meet_you_I_m_an_artist.png)
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my sanity
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Marble topped ledges break fairly easily.
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skating in warehouses that were freshly built but not yet rented was kinda big for a while where i lived. usually there wasnt too much destruction, just some sheets of plywood being scuffed and broken drywall from stacking the sheets and putting angle iron on the edges to make ledges. one time people got a little rowdy and found out they leave the keys in the skyjacks and golf cart. i think the golf cart was turned into a 3 wheeler by the end. a golf cart might actually be less than a marble slab though. as someone mentioned, according to most citizens any skate damage to property is gonna cost at least 6 figures to repair
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If skating past an expensive car dealer and flicking my cigarette into a drop top Lamborghini counts
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was skating some big bronze statue the other day when this caricature of an artist ran up, he was all in black with black frame glasses and a little beard stubble and he was freaking out, yelling at me for jumping on the art. I apologized and said I understood his concern for me potentially damaging the thing (been trying to take the path of least resistance lately in confrontations) and this fool tells me no, he doesn't actually care about the damage, he doesn't even like this piece, but what is upsetting him is my lack of respect for the art, apparently I am not giving the art the proper respect it deserves. It sounds conceited to say I destroyed this dude in a quick back-and-forth over the validity of performance as social critique and the dynamics governing audience behaviour when it comes to public art in general, but really he had no chance, since he was relying on status rather than logic, and my arguments are the product of decades long consideration, born out of frustration and necessity.
I need someone as articulate as you near me when this type of thing goes down. I go for the path of least resistance first but then digress to "Fuck you" if they persist to babble.
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If skating past an expensive car dealer and flicking my cigarette into a drop top Lamborghini counts
Your a bitch. Straight up.
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The custom pool in my back yard
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If skating past an expensive car dealer and flicking my cigarette into a drop top Lamborghini counts
class war!
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Window at a restaurant with a bank against the wall when i was like 15 and a pool light when I was maybe 19. We turned i on skating the pool at night and it got too hot without any water and popped. That pool ended up getting redone and filled back up anyway
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Went for a skate to the bottle shop in between rain showers, oh yeah I had been drinkin an smoking a little already also... While crossing the street, slipped out from the wet ground n my board shot into the street the same moment a woman drove by. My ride was actually hanging outta the side of hers when she pulled over.
Yanked it out then she demanded my license (didn't have one at the time plus I was on my skateboard, I laughed at her), showed her my CA ID, and she went ballistic because she didn't believe that a grown man didn't have a drivers license. She then asked for my insurance and went more nuts because guess what??? I had none at the time(laughed at her again). After handing my ID over she said she was callin the cops an hold tight...
Was legally drunk on the last month of a 7 year probation, an about a block from my house, what would u do??? Threw the board down and went back to where I came from, that's what I did. Still look for that white Scion to an from work every now n again.
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Found an abandoned building with a swimming pool that had blue rubber coating stuck on the floor which made it unskateable. We removed the entire coating of and made a mess.
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My dignity.
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Chipped up an old Korean war memorial.
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just saw this on don brown's insta - $30k!! not sure why more companies don't do this, but i'm glad that they don't!
https://www.instagram.com/p/BkQJX8HgmVH/?hl=en&taken-by=don_brown (https://www.instagram.com/p/BkQJX8HgmVH/?hl=en&taken-by=don_brown)
in the comments he says "this was period when companies realized that skaters were skating their buildings and were smart enough to scan they skate mags!"
what was it about this "period" that caused companies to do this, and why did they stop? did it end up being too expensive to go after all these skate brands, and the payouts just weren't worth the trouble?
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my girlfriend destroyed this floor to ceiling mirror in her bathroom tryna learn how to ollie... don't ask
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We used to skate on a sculpture by Henry Moore. Apparently it was worth millions and we were happily grinding and sliding all over it. Good times.
One time while we were skating it I asked a friend if Picasso would be stoked or bummed on us skating his sculpture. His response was "Who fucking cares? He's dead"
Cops always love telling tales about how you are destroying something expensive. "The city spent $800,000 fixing these benches last year because of you punks!"
Speaking of valuable of Chicago public art, has anyone ever done wallrides on that Chagall mosaic? You can see the Real team skating the handrail in that new Uprise 20 years video. I'd imagine that whole area would be a bust but there they are in the vid skating right by it.
(https://i.imgur.com/Qm2O8Mpl.png)
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We used to skate on a sculpture by Henry Moore. Apparently it was worth millions and we were happily grinding and sliding all over it. Good times.
One time while we were skating it I asked a friend if Picasso would be stoked or bummed on us skating his sculpture. His response was "Who fucking cares? He's dead"
Cops always love telling tales about how you are destroying something expensive. "The city spent $800,000 fixing these benches last year because of you punks!"
Speaking of valuable of Chicago public art, has anyone ever done wallrides on that Chagall mosaic? You can see the Real team skating the handrail in that new Uprise 20 years video. I'd imagine that whole area would be a bust but there they are in the vid skating right by it.
(https://i.imgur.com/Qm2O8Mpl.png)
Shit was a major bust when I was there. Pretty sure the Chagall mosaic is behind a bar that makes wall riding it impractical
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This is rebellious
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was skating this one wallride spot and part of the floor cracked off so i kept it
(https://i.imgur.com/KLxyNdZ.jpg)
(https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/260463370598219777/450760573513367553/image.jpg)
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my collar bone with no health insurance
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If skating past an expensive car dealer and flicking my cigarette into a drop top Lamborghini counts
class war!
regular Tyler Durden over here
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Nose bashed the mona lisa.
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Chipped up an old Korean war memorial.
Its a personal choice, I know, but I dont skate memorials of any kind.
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Expand Quote
We used to skate on a sculpture by Henry Moore. Apparently it was worth millions and we were happily grinding and sliding all over it. Good times.
One time while we were skating it I asked a friend if Picasso would be stoked or bummed on us skating his sculpture. His response was "Who fucking cares? He's dead"
Cops always love telling tales about how you are destroying something expensive. "The city spent $800,000 fixing these benches last year because of you punks!"
I feel like most people aren’t making truck contact (primo bails maybe?) with the Picasso so it’s not getting too beat up but yeah, if that ever went up for auction it would probably be north of $150 million dollars.
I’ve only ever done a wall ride or whatever so not guilty.
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one time my friends wouldn't stop skating the 5 stair at doherty high so i punched out a window and away we fled.
in retrospect, that was some pure unadulterated bullshit.
another time i couldn't do my trick over the guardrail into the bank at kenmore so i ran up onto a car to drop in on the roof, down the rear window nad of the trunk like that scene in big brother shit at mardis gras.
well, my foot went into the windshield and i bailed the rest of the trick.
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my left nut
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was skating this one wallride spot and part of the floor cracked off so i kept it
(https://i.imgur.com/KLxyNdZ.jpg)
(https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/260463370598219777/450760573513367553/image.jpg)
fuck yes, i did the same thing with a piece of marble from an old skate spot that i used to skate at when i was just beginning. they rebuilt it and changed some stuff so the spot is still skateable but there are less things to do. it's kinda cool to keep that kind of shit, like kalis with the love park tile
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I was skating at Biebel's park when my board flew out and chipped one of his teeth.