Author Topic: Joke thread  (Read 2617 times)

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kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #30 on: July 23, 2018, 08:13:37 PM »
what is the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player?  a hockey player showers after 3 periods.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #31 on: July 23, 2018, 08:26:49 PM »
SodaJerk's first high school football game was a lot like the first time he had sex.  He was bloody and sore at the end, but at least his dad came.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #32 on: July 23, 2018, 09:40:49 PM »
how do you tell if a hippie chick is on the rag?  she's only got one sock.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #33 on: July 24, 2018, 02:36:49 PM »
how do you cancel an appointment at a sperm bank?  tell them you cant cum.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #34 on: July 24, 2018, 02:40:25 PM »
what do you call a masturbating cow?   beef stroke-n-off

Johnny

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #35 on: July 24, 2018, 04:48:18 PM »
What’s the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?

A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #36 on: July 24, 2018, 04:52:49 PM »
what do you call kids born in whorehouses?  brothel sprouts.

pugmaster

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #37 on: July 24, 2018, 04:57:00 PM »
What do a chainsaw and a woman's pussy have in common? TEETH. SHARP TEETH.
I like my women the same way I like my personified cups of coffee...black...strong...and proud.

Johnny

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #38 on: July 24, 2018, 05:04:32 PM »
What’s the difference between a pick-pocket and a peeping tom?

One snatches your watch. The other watches your snatch.

CRAILFISH TO REVERT

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #39 on: July 24, 2018, 05:17:07 PM »
it's so hot, I actually saw a tweaker putting copper back inside an air conditioner.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #40 on: July 25, 2018, 05:02:52 PM »
two condoms are walking down the street at night and they see a gay bar. one condom turns to the other and says, "hey, you wanna go get shitfaced?"

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #41 on: July 25, 2018, 05:05:02 PM »
why do gays know so much about clothes? they spent the first decade or two of their lives in the closet.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #42 on: July 25, 2018, 05:09:15 PM »
what happened to the asian who walked into a wall with a boner?  he hit his nose.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #43 on: July 25, 2018, 05:10:50 PM »
one day in the locker room, Bob sees a fat man with a cork in his ass. curious, he asks the fat man how it got there. "well," says the fat man, "i was walking along the beach when i tripped over a lamp. there was a puff of smoke and this great magnificent guy in a turban came rolling out, it said, i am a genie. for releasing me i can grant you one wish? And i said, 'No shit!'"

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #44 on: July 25, 2018, 07:10:51 PM »
what do you call a bisexual person that is not in a relationship?  all bi myself.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #45 on: July 25, 2018, 07:15:00 PM »
why does the bride always wear white?  because it is good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #46 on: July 25, 2018, 08:11:02 PM »
how do you make your girlfriend scream during sex?  call her and tell her about it.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #47 on: July 31, 2018, 08:40:55 PM »
what's the difference between anal sex and a microwave?
with anal sex you can brown your meat without actually cooking it.

j....soy.....

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #48 on: July 31, 2018, 11:17:23 PM »
What did the leper say to the hooker?

Keep the tip.....

behavioralguide

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #49 on: August 01, 2018, 01:44:03 AM »
So I was out drinking at my local the other night and this jewish girl comes up and asks for my number,

I told her "We use names around here."
« Last Edit: August 01, 2018, 02:05:35 AM by behavioralguide »

johnes

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #50 on: August 03, 2018, 07:45:46 AM »
Why did the chicken cross the road carrying a bible?
-
He was going to churches

Skate_lurker_Rob

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #51 on: August 03, 2018, 11:03:41 AM »
Not really jokes but some good zipzaps for when you want to put someone in their place
You are the poster child for abortion......
You're are as useful as Anne Frank's drumkit...
What do you use for contraceptives, Your personality?
Somewhere out there, is a tree that produces oxygen just so you can breathe, go and apologize to it.
I hope you outlive your children, so biting and harsh that it can be used in conversation
I'd call you a cunt, but you lack both the depth and the warmth.

feel free to add your best I stole some but gladly would love to hear some more.
Sic Gorgiamus Allos Subjectatos Nunc



PPPPFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTT I fart on your pillow bare ass

Skate_lurker_Rob

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #52 on: August 03, 2018, 11:13:54 AM »
You're a failed abortion whose birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory
Sic Gorgiamus Allos Subjectatos Nunc



PPPPFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTT I fart on your pillow bare ass

dirtyweemidden

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #53 on: August 03, 2018, 02:05:05 PM »
tragic.

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #54 on: August 05, 2018, 05:16:16 PM »
 what's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women wild? a $100 bill!

Skate_lurker_Rob

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #55 on: August 05, 2018, 06:26:56 PM »
Your family's semen is tainted with moonshine, inbreeding, and shame.....
Sic Gorgiamus Allos Subjectatos Nunc



PPPPFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTT I fart on your pillow bare ass

fulltechnicalskizzy

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #56 on: August 05, 2018, 06:57:16 PM »
You're a failed abortion whose birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory
aw man

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #57 on: August 05, 2018, 08:21:50 PM »
what did one gay sperm say to the other gay sperm?  how are we supposed to find an egg in all of this shit?

kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #58 on: August 10, 2018, 01:19:15 AM »
why is a woman's pussy like a public restroom?  they both feel good, but you wonder who has been there before you


kentrock

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Re: Joke thread
« Reply #59 on: August 10, 2018, 01:20:32 AM »
what do you call the useless flesh that surrounds a vagina?  the woman