Author Topic: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?  (Read 1476 times)

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marty.

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Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« on: September 04, 2007, 11:00:54 PM »
to start off the story, when i was a freshmen i fucked up my right ankle pretty badly, and now it slightly tilts outward when i walk. its not a big deal, but occasionaly it causes me to stumble and stuff

so im walking into school last year and kind of stumble into a wall cause of my fucked ankle. i guess a teacher saw this and thought i was drunk cause i got yanked out of third period by the assistant principal. after they patted me down, searched me, searching my locker, and finding nothing, he took me to the nurses office to so she could check me out.

after asking me about the cigarette burn on my arm, and me saying i burnt my arm on the oven, she did all the standard sobriety tests on me (walk in a straight line, stand on one foot, etc) and made me take a breathalizer test. then she held both her hands out in front of her and told me to squeeze her wrists. i felt weird, but i just wanted to get out of there, so i put one hand around each of her wrists and started squeezing, although apparently not hard enough, because she quickly told me to do it harder. finally, after one of the most awkward minutes ive ever experienced, she had deemed my squeezing skills adequate and allowed me to release her hands.

now, my question is, what the fuck was up with that? ive never seen or heard of this test being done to test sobriety before, and it was kinda...bizarre. id even say that my squeezing ability are better drunk than sober.  ive discussed it with a few of my friends and no one really seems to have an answer, but you people seem to be quite knowledgeable with this sort of stuff
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Insomniac

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2007, 05:41:14 AM »
Breathalizer test should be enough. I've never heard of such stupidity as the wrist squeeze test. I guess you look kinda creepy then, why the hell they didn't believe you in the first place?
Weird, really.

ahlee

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2007, 05:58:21 AM »
I would have just pretended I was drunk and grabbed her tits. .

marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2007, 08:02:14 AM »
im guessing the breathalizer wasnt even cause i could have taken pills or something that wouldnt show up on that. i dunno...the whole thing was very confusing and creepy, i went back to class feeling like id been taken advantage of. fuckers ripped off all my book covers too when they were searching my locker and then i got shit from my teachers about my books not being covered. lets just turn this into a fuck high school thread
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grimcity

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #4 on: September 05, 2007, 09:57:34 AM »
Pills won't help you pass a breathalyzer... neither will gum or anything else (besides naturally processing the booze out of your system). Alcohol spreads through all of your tissues, lungs included, so even if you had just finished a package of tic tacs and gargled with mouthwash, it wouldn't matter.

The wrist squeeze is just retarded... hell, I have reoccurring carpal tunnel syndrome in my left hand, and on my worst days I can't pinch a cigarette... that school nurse needs to join Slap so she can get kook'd.

marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #5 on: September 05, 2007, 10:01:49 AM »
nah, i meant they might have thought i took pills, and thats why i was fucked up. but even if i did, you'd think the straight line test and those other tests would suffice...i dont know, i guess i shouldnt be surprised, schools dont usually let logic get in the way of their policies
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marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #6 on: September 05, 2007, 10:13:04 AM »
and while we're on the subject of school, heres a letter i stole last year when i was an aid in the office. its sent from an english teacher to our then assistant principal about a kid i went to school with.

http://s229.photobucket.com/albums/ee113/WeTigers19118/?action=view&current=letter.jpg

i took out last names cause i took some other stuff worth way more than a piece of paper and i dont want it getting back to me, but i dont really know how much of a difference taking out last names would really make...still dont feel comfortable with it though. this may qualify as something thats only funny if you know the person, but i think its pretty good, especially the hermione granger part

also, note all the grammatical errors and such in the letter, written by an english teacher. plus females cant do the teabagging
« Last Edit: September 05, 2007, 10:20:26 AM by WeTigers »
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Joshewuhh

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #7 on: September 05, 2007, 10:27:08 AM »
Thats pretty messed up.
A big fuck you to High School.
I hated High School.

what the

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #8 on: September 05, 2007, 02:16:31 PM »
ya me too,i hate school,i told the teacher to fuck him self in grade 7,pulled the fire alarm,lit a match in grade 3,and then to top it off got kicked out for not going,i hated school

MexicanSpaniard

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #9 on: September 05, 2007, 02:23:03 PM »
I would have just pretended I was drunk and grabbed her tits. .

That's where this thread should have gone in the original post.
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marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #10 on: September 05, 2007, 02:28:22 PM »
if only i was that quick of a thinker, i coulda grabbed some nurse boob. but really, no one has ever heard of this being done before? thats really bizarre
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MexicanSpaniard

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #11 on: September 05, 2007, 02:31:04 PM »
if only i was that quick of a thinker, i coulda grabbed some nurse boob. but really, no one has ever heard of this being done before? thats really bizarre

No it sounds like perving out to me. My 'friend' has been pulled over three times and that's not SOP.
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marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #12 on: September 05, 2007, 02:35:56 PM »
what the fuck!? i got taken advantage of. thats really weird, i thought for sure someone here would have an explanation for that. are like...wrist fetishes a common thing?
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MexicanSpaniard

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #13 on: September 05, 2007, 02:51:55 PM »
what the fuck!? i got taken advantage of. thats really weird, i thought for sure someone here would have an explanation for that. are like...wrist fetishes a common thing?

A fetish is a fetish. My 'friend' also has gotten several PI's and they don't do it then either. Well, unless it's some new technique, it happened to 'him' ages ago, you Sir may have simply been violated.
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heckler

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #14 on: September 05, 2007, 03:03:03 PM »
and while we're on the subject of school, heres a letter i stole last year when i was an aid in the office. its sent from an english teacher to our then assistant principal about a kid i went to school with.

http://s229.photobucket.com/albums/ee113/WeTigers19118/?action=view&current=letter.jpg

i took out last names cause i took some other stuff worth way more than a piece of paper and i dont want it getting back to me, but i dont really know how much of a difference taking out last names would really make...still dont feel comfortable with it though. this may qualify as something thats only funny if you know the person, but i think its pretty good, especially the hermione granger part

also, note all the grammatical errors and such in the letter, written by an english teacher. plus females cant do the teabagging
ahahaha thats fucked up, but fuck high school. I've got two years left, and I hate it.

bumptobar

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #15 on: September 05, 2007, 03:45:55 PM »
Eh, minus the extremely annoying black chicks, jocks, and overly proud/concieted clean cut kids, its not that bad.  Ah who am i kidding, minus the hot chicks and my friends it sucks.

marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #16 on: September 05, 2007, 03:53:55 PM »
what the fuck!? i got taken advantage of. thats really weird, i thought for sure someone here would have an explanation for that. are like...wrist fetishes a common thing?

A fetish is a fetish. My 'friend' also has gotten several PI's and they don't do it then either. Well, unless it's some new technique, it happened to 'him' ages ago, you Sir may have simply been violated.

are you guys just fucking with me like when you almost got that guy to drink his own cum? fuck, this is really weirding me out
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Joshewuhh

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #17 on: September 05, 2007, 05:01:19 PM »
DONUT NAZI!

HAhahahahahahaha

Elaborate now!

marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #18 on: September 05, 2007, 05:06:31 PM »
we have like, a donut cart at our school that goes around to our teachers once a month to make up for them making shitty wages. he tried to take some donuts off the cart and got called out by the teacher
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bentmode

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #19 on: September 05, 2007, 06:28:13 PM »
Pills won't help you pass a breathalyzer... neither will gum or anything else (besides naturally processing the booze out of your system). Alcohol spreads through all of your tissues, lungs included, so even if you had just finished a package of tic tacs and gargled with mouthwash, it wouldn't matter.


not that ive ever taken the breathalyzer but when the drunchies kick in i usually fancy a burrito and then drown it in tapatio. the tapatio usually gets the alcohol smell toned down.
Han solo blew up the Death Star in Episode 4.  Heard it from a friend.  Reliable source.

grimcity

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #20 on: September 05, 2007, 09:21:05 PM »
and while we're on the subject of school, heres a letter i stole last year when i was an aid in the office. its sent from an english teacher to our then assistant principal about a kid i went to school with.

http://s229.photobucket.com/albums/ee113/WeTigers19118/?action=view&current=letter.jpg

i took out last names cause i took some other stuff worth way more than a piece of paper and i dont want it getting back to me, but i dont really know how much of a difference taking out last names would really make...still dont feel comfortable with it though. this may qualify as something thats only funny if you know the person, but i think its pretty good, especially the hermione granger part

also, note all the grammatical errors and such in the letter, written by an english teacher. plus females cant do the teabagging
What's the "doughnut incident?"

marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #21 on: September 05, 2007, 09:21:50 PM »
we have like, a donut cart at our school that goes around to our teachers once a month to make up for them making shitty wages. he tried to take some donuts off the cart and got called out by the teacher
8)

marty.

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Re: Wrist squeeze to test sobriety?
« Reply #22 on: September 05, 2007, 09:23:39 PM »
that kid was fuuucked. my job as the office aid was 90% me filing kid's records. i remember looking in his and there would be pocket knifes in there and pictures he drew of cops hanging from trees
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