Author Topic: pissing is awesome  (Read 6081 times)

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pissing is awesome
« on: January 30, 2008, 10:28:37 PM »
after drinking heavily earlier and pissing all over a public bathroom, i really started to reminisc(sp) on my days of being drunk and peeing on funny things. such as in grocery store freezers, mall stores on merchandise, other people, my own room, fuck, i figured you guys might have some awesome stories

baxter

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #1 on: January 30, 2008, 10:33:32 PM »
gnarly

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2008, 10:42:26 PM »
No drunk pissing story for me but when I was in high school I did watch my 8 yr old brother get up in the middle of the night completely out of it, walk to his dresser, pull the drawer out, piss all over his shirts and then shut it and go back to bed. 

Little fucker was so out of it he thought he was in the bathroom.  Mom wasn't too happy the next morning.

Doctor Handsome

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #3 on: January 30, 2008, 10:46:36 PM »
I upper decker toilets with pee and other various nic-nacs from the bathroom (soap, toothbrushes, q tips, razors, etc.) whenever I don't have to shit. I also used to get drunk and pee on toilet paper, but then I saw a blog with someone doing it (Neckface I think?) and it wasn't funny to me anymore.

Evil Kraken from the Arctic Sea

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #4 on: January 30, 2008, 11:06:12 PM »
We did a school trip to versailles (next to paris/france) and we were living in these caranvans on a campsite. Unnessecary to say we weīre shitfaced every single night...anyways, my roommate (caravanmate) was really drunk one night and I was already asleep. I suddenly woke up because I heard some noise. It sounded like a pipe was broken and like water was drippling. I was still halfasleep/drunk and stretched my arms out of  the bed when I felt a warm water sensation tickling on my hand and arm...I turned on the light and there was my homie standing in the middle of the room, basically pissing on my shoes and trousers on the floor. I yelled at him but he didt even realize it. He just kept pissing. I pushed him and he was like "nooo,nooo, itīs nothing, itīs alright man" and I said "fuck you, fuck itīs alright, you fucking pissed all over the place" and he just again said in this sleepy/drunk/calm voice "noo, no no, itīs alright, nothing happened" like he tried to hypnotize  me or shit I dunno. Anyhows, he fell onto the bed annd wouldnīt move no matter what we did. He was just totally in coma, half dead asleep.
So this other roommate and me had to clean that shit up. Next morning Leo (the peeweeguy) was like "what the fuck happened last night, Iīm still drunk" and I told him he had peed on my clothes. And then the thing happened that really got me mad, he said I was making it up and he hadnīt done anything and I was just trying to make him look bad. He couldnīt remember shit. And I had to listen to this motherfucker saying I was a bad friend after whiping his piss from the floor. Then he told the other guys from my class that I was talking shit on him even though I hadnīt even planned on telling anyone, because really, heīs my homie and itīs not something you can be very proud of. Anyways, he kept telling people I was talking shit on him so I finally did what any friend would have done and beat the shit out of him. Funny thing is next day he was drunk again and he could suddenly remember everything...
Anyways, thatīs the only peestory iīve got, I bet you guys can come up with better stuff...

Oh, I love it when pissing feels so awesome that it gives me shivers...itīs great...
I'll go frontside on some tranny for you.

baxter

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #5 on: January 30, 2008, 11:15:09 PM »
We did a school trip to versailles (next to paris/france) and we were living in these caranvans on a campsite. Unnessecary to say we weīre shitfaced every single night...anyways, my roommate (caravanmate) was really drunk one night and I was already asleep. I suddenly woke up because I heard some noise. It sounded like a pipe was broken and like water was drippling. I was still halfasleep/drunk and stretched my arms out of  the bed when I felt a warm water sensation tickling on my hand and arm...I turned on the light and there was my homie standing in the middle of the room, basically pissing on my shoes and trousers on the floor. I yelled at him but he didt even realize it. He just kept pissing. I pushed him and he was like "nooo,nooo, itīs nothing, itīs alright man" and I said "fuck you, fuck itīs alright, you fucking pissed all over the place" and he just again said in this sleepy/drunk/calm voice "noo, no no, itīs alright, nothing happened" like he tried to hypnotize  me or shit I dunno. Anyhows, he fell onto the bed annd wouldnīt move no matter what we did. He was just totally in coma, half dead asleep.
So this other roommate and me had to clean that shit up. Next morning Leo (the peeweeguy) was like "what the fuck happened last night, Iīm still drunk" and I told him he had peed on my clothes. And then the thing happened that really got me mad, he said I was making it up and he hadnīt done anything and I was just trying to make him look bad. He couldnīt remember shit. And I had to listen to this motherfucker saying I was a bad friend after whiping his piss from the floor. Then he told the other guys from my class that I was talking shit on him even though I hadnīt even planned on telling anyone, because really, heīs my homie and itīs not something you can be very proud of. Anyways, he kept telling people I was talking shit on him so I finally did what any friend would have done and beat the shit out of him. Funny thing is next day he was drunk again and he could suddenly remember everything...
Anyways, thatīs the only peestory iīve got, I bet you guys can come up with better stuff...

Oh, I love it when pissing feels so awesome that it gives me shivers...itīs great...
This happens to me way to much.

All I can think of is in third grade I was wearing cord shorts and I had to go pee really bad and once I got in the stall I thought I was pretty much going to make it, I peed myself and my mom had to come and give me new clothes. Shit

Evil Kraken from the Arctic Sea

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #6 on: January 30, 2008, 11:18:42 PM »
UUUHHHH what really sucks is when youīre wearing lightbrown pants and youīre pissing really motivated, and the piss is sprinkling back from the urinal right onto your  pants (only happens when your pissing pressure is very high). You can see the wet spots sooo well on lightbrown clothing...
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baxter

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #7 on: January 30, 2008, 11:22:10 PM »
Yeah I was wearing just that. Light brown cord shorts. Ill never forget, I saw my dick then I peed a little it got all on my shirt then back on my shorts and down into my white socks turning them yellow.

Evil Kraken from the Arctic Sea

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #8 on: January 30, 2008, 11:23:05 PM »
HAHAHA wow, awesome!
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sectachrome

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #9 on: January 30, 2008, 11:29:18 PM »
The worst is when youre dreaming, and in the dream youre pissing.  Except youre actually pissing in real life too because youre so into the dream and wake up all of a sudden and are like "hey wait a minute....FUCK"

Has that ever happened to anyone else?  Ive done it a couple times.

baxter

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #10 on: January 30, 2008, 11:32:56 PM »
I think I made it worst trying to cover it up.
Ive done this on more then one occasion which is highly stupid of me.
When I got the pee on me and the coast was clear I went to the sink and put water all over my shorts to make it look like water. I still don't know what I was thinking.


Yeah fuck but if you think about it thats the best way to pee. minus the part that your in your own bed and the humiliation. The release is magical.

Doctor Handsome

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #11 on: January 30, 2008, 11:34:03 PM »
The worst is when youre dreaming, and in the dream youre pissing.  Except youre actually pissing in real life too because youre so into the dream and wake up all of a sudden and are like "hey wait a minute....FUCK"

Has that ever happened to anyone else?  Ive done it a couple times.

Haha I did that almost every night when I was like 7 or 8. Whoops.
« Last Edit: January 31, 2008, 01:17:53 AM by Doctor Handsome »

sectachrome

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #12 on: January 30, 2008, 11:39:25 PM »
Yeah...7 or 8....me too.....

Evil Kraken from the Arctic Sea

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #13 on: January 31, 2008, 12:20:50 AM »
The worst is when youre dreaming, and in the dream youre pissing.  Except youre actually pissing in real life too because youre so into the dream and wake up all of a sudden and are like "hey wait a minute....FUCK"

Has that ever happened to anyone else?  Ive done it a couple times.
wow
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jesus0nvi4gra

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #14 on: January 31, 2008, 12:59:09 AM »
Yeah...7 or 8....me too.....

Oh dude, I know it.

loophole

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #15 on: January 31, 2008, 01:27:57 AM »
We did a school trip to versailles (next to paris/france) and we were living in these caranvans on a campsite. Unnessecary to say we weīre shitfaced every single night...anyways, my roommate (caravanmate) was really drunk one night and I was already asleep. I suddenly woke up because I heard some noise. It sounded like a pipe was broken and like water was drippling. I was still halfasleep/drunk and stretched my arms out of  the bed when I felt a warm water sensation tickling on my hand and arm...I turned on the light and there was my homie standing in the middle of the room, basically pissing on my shoes and trousers on the floor. I yelled at him but he didt even realize it. He just kept pissing. I pushed him and he was like "nooo,nooo, itīs nothing, itīs alright man" and I said "fuck you, fuck itīs alright, you fucking pissed all over the place" and he just again said in this sleepy/drunk/calm voice "noo, no no, itīs alright, nothing happened" like he tried to hypnotize  me or shit I dunno. Anyhows, he fell onto the bed annd wouldnīt move no matter what we did. He was just totally in coma, half dead asleep.
So this other roommate and me had to clean that shit up. Next morning Leo (the peeweeguy) was like "what the fuck happened last night, Iīm still drunk" and I told him he had peed on my clothes. And then the thing happened that really got me mad, he said I was making it up and he hadnīt done anything and I was just trying to make him look bad. He couldnīt remember shit. And I had to listen to this motherfucker saying I was a bad friend after whiping his piss from the floor. Then he told the other guys from my class that I was talking shit on him even though I hadnīt even planned on telling anyone, because really, heīs my homie and itīs not something you can be very proud of. Anyways, he kept telling people I was talking shit on him so I finally did what any friend would have done and beat the shit out of him. Funny thing is next day he was drunk again and he could suddenly remember everything...
Anyways, thatīs the only peestory iīve got, I bet you guys can come up with better stuff...

Oh, I love it when pissing feels so awesome that it gives me shivers...itīs great...
This happens to me way to much.
i taught myself how to get those shivers on cue. so when i'm bored and feel like a good shiver, i make sure it goes down. i love it. it's like a tiny orgasm.

Evil Kraken from the Arctic Sea

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #16 on: January 31, 2008, 02:01:50 AM »
I'll go frontside on some tranny for you.

poocrusher

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #17 on: January 31, 2008, 02:19:55 AM »
Fuck.....


I think "whatever" will have to take second fiddle to "useless wooden banter" for a little bit. 

Whatever seems to be a little bitch for me right now.

BriDen

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #18 on: January 31, 2008, 03:44:24 AM »
The worst is when youre dreaming, and in the dream youre pissing.  Except youre actually pissing in real life too because youre so into the dream and wake up all of a sudden and are like "hey wait a minute....FUCK"

Has that ever happened to anyone else?  Ive done it a couple times.

Haha I did that almost every night when I was like 7 or 8. Whoops.
Yeah it's happened to me too. Not on an every night basis, but when it did happen, it was so embarassing. Like, I'd be in that half unconscious state and be fully enjoying how warm I was until I realized that I just pissed myself in my own bedroom, 5 feet from the bathroom.
And those piss shivers are sooo good

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #19 on: January 31, 2008, 08:35:40 AM »
I never get to enjoy it. On the way home from bars i always stop off at the bus station to piss, but there are always gnarly crackheads lurking there, so i gotta rush it. it's fucking balls.

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #20 on: January 31, 2008, 08:41:53 AM »
I pissed in the lobby of a burger king once, just knelt down and did it under a table in plain view of everyone, I was punk and drunk in those day though, so don't judge me. A friend fully pissed in the back of a cab too. We were bastards.

skatemore,man

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #21 on: January 31, 2008, 08:52:20 AM »
I never get to enjoy it. On the way home from bars i always stop off at the bus station to piss, but there are always gnarly crackheads lurking there, so i gotta rush it. it's fucking balls.

eh, the crackheads don't really fuck with me when i'm pissing, if they talk i just start talking about how great it feels to pee.

When i was in Salisbury NC in November i'd had sex with this chick in the bathroom of this kid matt's house that i'd never met except for the night that i fucked the girl in his bathroom. This dude was a mid level scum bag, pretty sure that he was into heroin, always looking strung out with sunken cheeks and shit. The night at his house he started getting a little close to me, trying to lift up my shirt sleeves to look at my ink, telling me to shave my arms so the colors will stand out more, i started getting pissed and told him to fuck off, went in the kitchen and drank some moonshine with peaches in it. The next week at open mic i got blasted per usual. I was in the bathroom pissing and singing an allman brothers song because that's what i do when i'm drunk. So i hear someone come into the bathroom and just keep on singing. Then i could feel the person who came in trying to look at my shit while standing behind me. I looked in the reflection of my glasses and saw that it was the questionably homosexual kid matt. I then turned around and said "this what you're looking for?" and pissed on his jeans. That's the only time i've ever pissed on someone, i hope that i don't have to do it again.

Mackattack

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #22 on: January 31, 2008, 08:53:10 AM »
I think as a man it is my duty to piss in the outdoors as much as possible.

Also one time i was drunk and i went to sleep. I had what i thought was a dream where i was pissing on a pile of clothes and towells in my room, and sure enough when i woke up my clothes, carpet, and towells and cell phone were all soaked in piss.

And about a week ago i was drunk at the movies. I had to break the seal so bad but i didnt want to miss much of the movie so i walked right outside the doors and started pissing in the trash car by the door. Some guy came back from the actual bathroom and caught me in the act, piss flying out of my dick. He was shocked and he didnt confront me about it.


ahlee

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #23 on: January 31, 2008, 08:54:46 AM »
shitting is way cooler

skatemore,man

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #24 on: January 31, 2008, 08:56:24 AM »
shitting is way cooler

unless you're tripping, cause then it's impossible

cat

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #25 on: January 31, 2008, 09:46:33 AM »
shitting is way cooler

i use love the feeling of pushing a huge soft shit out of my tiny ass hole, it felt really good

the canadian suit

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #26 on: January 31, 2008, 10:03:13 AM »
last summer, my homies had a fire pit session going in, we all got wasted and my friend decided to try to put out the fire with his piss

he over shot, pissed all over his girlfriend and her friend, tried to help them, ended up knocking the portable fire pit over and catching his lawn on fire.
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skatemore,man

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #27 on: January 31, 2008, 10:06:08 AM »
last summer, my homies had a fire pit session going in, we all got wasted and my friend decided to try to put out the fire with his piss

he over shot, pissed all over his girlfriend and her friend, tried to help them, ended up knocking the portable fire pit over and catching his lawn on fire.

that's great. i was able to picture it happening.

Ronald Wilson Reagan

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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #28 on: January 31, 2008, 10:10:09 AM »
No drunk pissing story for me but when I was in high school I did watch my 8 yr old brother get up in the middle of the night completely out of it, walk to his dresser, pull the drawer out, piss all over his shirts and then shut it and go back to bed. 

Little fucker was so out of it he thought he was in the bathroom.  Mom wasn't too happy the next morning.
My cousin did the same thing, except it wasn't at his house, it was at some girl's place that he was staying at. She woke him up mid-stream, he stopped, flushed the handle to the next higher drawer and tried to get back in bed with her. She wasn't having it.

And the pissing dream sucks. It always fucks me up. I think I am at a urinal, that my aim is true, but everytime I try it just gets me all wet. I've learned cues though now, so it doesn't happen anymore. Not since tuesday atleast.

Amd shitting is great. Nothing beats a nice big log that makes you want to pass out after you drop it. Best cure to insomnia ever.
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Re: pissing is awesome
« Reply #29 on: January 31, 2008, 10:37:10 AM »
when i was 12 i was on a ski trip with my family and pissed in the sauna at the lodge. stunk so bad the whole time we were there. i had no idea pea stunk that bad.