Author Topic: FUCK !  (Read 31453 times)

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rawbertson.

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #180 on: October 12, 2010, 09:26:57 AM »
to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
Did you offer your BBW some red lobster? She might have toughed it out for some cheddar biscuits.

i cant justify dropping that kind of dough on a ho after last time, i need to drop actual dough like a baker then maybe she'll open that hole
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oldeath

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #181 on: October 12, 2010, 12:35:12 PM »
to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
Did you offer your BBW some red lobster? She might have toughed it out for some cheddar biscuits.

i cant justify dropping that kind of dough on a ho after last time, i need to drop actual dough like a baker then maybe she'll open that hole
HAHAHAHA

Monty Burns

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #182 on: October 12, 2010, 12:41:27 PM »
to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
Did you offer your BBW some red lobster? She might have toughed it out for some cheddar biscuits.

i cant justify dropping that kind of dough on a ho after last time, i need to drop actual dough like a baker then maybe she'll open that hole

fucking hell man , you need to set up a paypall acount or something so I can buy you a beer

Narcissus

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #183 on: October 12, 2010, 01:32:03 PM »
Rawb's like the nerd in Can't Hardly Wait. At first, people clown on him endlessly, then after rapping shirtless at the house-party-of-the-year about a skateboard website and various ho-related issues, he blossoms into a double flippin' Based God figure. Bitches flocking is the next logical step.
i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after.
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Donkey Lips

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #184 on: October 13, 2010, 04:49:45 AM »
I'm hoping somehow we can get Rawb on a reality show. Either next year's Jersey Shore, or maybe his own Rawb North America Tour. The world needs to hear your stories.

oldeath

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #185 on: October 13, 2010, 11:16:12 AM »
I'm hoping somehow we can get Rawb on a reality show. Either next year's Jersey Shore, or maybe his own Rawb North America Tour. The world needs to hear your stories.
he should have his own show where he is looking for a chill obese girl that he can tittyfuck

rawbertson.

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #186 on: October 13, 2010, 12:28:02 PM »
i have a cam i just dont have a filmer i should take a trip up to different pals houses and they can film me chilling

when i fingerblasted that chick from a few weeks ago she saw my cam and the 3ccd thing is always reflective and she was like "is that on?" and i was like no the battery isnt even in it... she was like "oh guys with cameras always creep me out" like fuck as if id leave the shit out in the open like that if i were tryin to voyeur
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DEDBBIS

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #187 on: October 13, 2010, 05:50:23 PM »
i have a cam i just dont have a filmer i should take a trip up to different pals houses and they can film me chilling

when i fingerblasted that chick from a few weeks ago she saw my cam and the 3ccd thing is always reflective and she was like "is that on?" and i was like no the battery isnt even in it... she was like "oh guys with cameras always creep me out" like fuck as if id leave the shit out in the open like that if i were tryin to voyeur
You should start your own candid camera-style show where you hide a camera in your room and point out the blinking red light once you're massaging that cervix.

There ain't no shit on T.V. tonight

the whompler

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #188 on: October 18, 2010, 01:49:39 AM »

rawbertson.

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #189 on: October 18, 2010, 12:07:44 PM »
so what is the logical next step now for me to get the best tittyfuck and also spending the least amount of money?
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rawbertson.

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #190 on: November 02, 2010, 09:57:00 AM »
i went on plenty of fish again, i got some emails from some decent girls, i wish i wasnt at owrk so i could post, there is this one that is actually really fucking hot on that ok cupid and she actually messaged me but i probably blew it in my re-message

so anyway on plent of fish this fucking disgusting ass girl writes me a message (and trust me girls never write me messages) and i write her back and she says "add me to msn [email protected]" or something like that, lol. anyway she lives in this small ass town like 30 min away and like maybe 2 lines into the conversation she says "we should hang out sometime" then maybe 2 more lines int othe convo she says "i have this idea lets watch paranormal activity 2 then hang out after" then "what are you doing tonight"

she is just dyin to fuck, i am playing settlers tonight so fuck that, i might just go hit it, i dont know im just so jonsed but she looks like dog shit. in high school we had this ex convict who was apparently reformed come in and talk to our law class and he said "a hole is a hole and a pair of lips is a pair of lips".  there is this normal lookin chick who said she wants to hang out with me next week.

 is that greasy if im banging this baneling then switching up next week to the normal one? the gross chick probs doesnt care if i bang her once then bounce cause she is getting to bang rawb (a self proclaimed celebrity) and to her i am probably next level
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Ronald Wilson Reagan

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #191 on: November 02, 2010, 10:31:40 AM »
Haha, getting taste reccomendations from the ex convict who came to school to threaten you.

Choad Muskrat

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #192 on: November 02, 2010, 11:29:14 AM »
Haha, getting taste reccomendations from the ex convict who came to school to threaten you.

There was a janitor in my highschool that had '69' tatooed on the inside of his lower lip and he would go up to chicks in the halls and do that 2 finger pussy licking gesture while pulling down his lower lip to show the tat.

I have no idea how he didn't get fired.




Donkey Lips

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #193 on: November 02, 2010, 11:50:26 AM »
the gross chick probs doesnt care if i bang her once then bounce cause she is getting to bang rawb (a self proclaimed celebrity) and to her i am probably next level
That's god damn right. Post a pic and we'll rate her later. We won't steer you wrong.

Inbred Jed

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #194 on: November 02, 2010, 01:28:31 PM »
What is Settlers? Some kins of wagon train LARP shit?

saucy ragu

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #195 on: November 02, 2010, 09:25:46 PM »
What is Settlers? Some kins of wagon train LARP shit?

I hope so, that was the line that had me gasping.

At my old job at a bowling alley, we had a new mechanic for the summer; a husky dude from New Jersey who claimed many amazing sexual conquests and acted like his dick was the Covenant. He once told me that all you need to look for is a "warm, moist hole." I asked him if he'd fuck a dude then and he stomped off.
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ice nine

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #196 on: November 02, 2010, 09:46:09 PM »



I;m sure i;m not the only dc/monster/subaru type guy here

Donkey Lips

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #197 on: November 12, 2010, 04:56:33 AM »
i went on plenty of fish again, i got some emails from some decent girls, i wish i wasnt at owrk so i could post, there is this one that is actually really fucking hot on that ok cupid and she actually messaged me but i probably blew it in my re-message

so anyway on plent of fish this fucking disgusting ass girl writes me a message (and trust me girls never write me messages) and i write her back and she says "add me to msn [email protected]" or something like that, lol. anyway she lives in this small ass town like 30 min away and like maybe 2 lines into the conversation she says "we should hang out sometime" then maybe 2 more lines int othe convo she says "i have this idea lets watch paranormal activity 2 then hang out after" then "what are you doing tonight"

she is just dyin to fuck, i am playing settlers tonight so fuck that, i might just go hit it, i dont know im just so jonsed but she looks like dog shit. in high school we had this ex convict who was apparently reformed come in and talk to our law class and he said "a hole is a hole and a pair of lips is a pair of lips".?  there is this normal lookin chick who said she wants to hang out with me next week.

 is that greasy if im banging this baneling then switching up next week to the normal one? the gross chick probs doesnt care if i bang her once then bounce cause she is getting to bang rawb (a self proclaimed celebrity) and to her i am probably next level
It's Friday. It's a balmy 47 degrees in my area. That means it's time to hear more rawb online dating adventures. So tell me sport, how's the fishing trip been this week?

Beer Keg Peg Leg

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #198 on: November 12, 2010, 05:03:46 AM »
yeah rawby, you baneling busted any ass recently?

S. Samyro

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #199 on: November 20, 2010, 09:57:01 PM »
Someone find me some pictures of Rawb. I want to do something with them.

(not jack off to them)

(maybe)

(no homo)

Watson

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #200 on: December 01, 2010, 01:05:33 PM »
I wasn't regularly coming to Slap for awhile, but thanks to a slow day at work just had the chance to read this thread front to back. One of the funniest threads I can remember in my Slap history.

Rawb, this shit is bumped like the many many cervixes you have bumped into oblivion with your finger blasting prowess.

Please don't leave us just hangin'. The fat chick with small tits?! The gross Harry Potter chick?! The normal looking chick?!

We need to know.
what if your dad suicides in a pair of salazars with a note for you in the fucking tongue pocket.
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Mackattack

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #201 on: December 01, 2010, 07:23:27 PM »

RipGrip

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #202 on: December 01, 2010, 08:35:49 PM »
epic. we at least need a 'day in the life'

Watson

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #203 on: December 02, 2010, 12:39:12 AM »
RipGrip you need to make a Rawb sculpture. Fuckin microphone and a blunt in one hand, knuckle deep fingerblastin with the other, glasses all hittin the ground after landing a v-heel and shit.

You know how many of those you could sell on Slap?
what if your dad suicides in a pair of salazars with a note for you in the fucking tongue pocket.
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praying is for fags and weird lookin people

magicstickyhand

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #204 on: December 02, 2010, 03:38:52 AM »
RipGrip you need to make a Rawb sculpture. Fuckin microphone and a blunt in one hand, knuckle deep fingerblastin with the other, glasses all hittin the ground after landing a v-heel and shit.

You know how many of those you could sell on Slap?
millions
.......
any new story's rawb ??
i think i was,anyways

rawbertson.

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #205 on: December 02, 2010, 09:09:23 AM »
fuck lately has just been fucked.

i went to the dog park and met this girl off plenty of fish. she had this awesome golden retriever just like mine but a little smaller. i said "i miss school, i love how you can just take a day off if you arent feeling it" and she is like "well i dont take days off because of that" and just general bitchyness eventually led to her being very opinionated and pissed me off cause it was cold out.

then she says "you dont smoke weed do you?" and i was like "no, of course not" and shes like "ok good, cause that is a deal breaker. im in college to become a cop". convo went really awkward from there and we parted ways she seemed to want to meet again. i went on msn and she was on sayin whats up hey doll all this kitten shit, then i just said "you know what its not that i care about the weed thing i just fuckin hate cops" and block+delete.


there is this MDMA friend i have, last weekend he did MDMA, mushrooms, and acid all at once and staye dup for 3 days straight. he was acting really fucked up about a year ago like the dude who took too much acid on slc punk but now he seems fine which is weird because he seems to be doing more drugs than ever.


he lives with these korean pro gamers they are amzing at sc2 but pro for wow specifically (just platinum league in sc2 ) and they were also tripping and this Harvey's employee chick came over and was listening to me play guitar. then we sung the night they drove old dixie down toghether. she is fat but has big titties, but she is short so she doesnt seem as fat.  anyway so we part ways i came back to MDMA's last fiday she was there and i told her her hair looked nice she got it dyed or whatever and she was SUPER diggin me, but i didnt get a chance to get alone with her. she seemed so impressed that i have a car. i think its a done deal but i have this weird thing on my dick at the base its like a zit or something FUCK
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Inbred Jed

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #206 on: December 02, 2010, 09:25:03 AM »
thank you

Insatiable

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #207 on: December 02, 2010, 09:54:37 AM »
then she says "you dont smoke weed do you?" and i was like "no, of course not" and shes like "ok good, cause that is a deal breaker. im in college to become a cop". convo went really awkward from there and we parted ways she seemed to want to meet again. i went on msn and she was on sayin whats up hey doll all this kitten shit, then i just said "you know what its not that i care about the weed thing i just fuckin hate cops" and block+delete.
That is nothing short of a boss maneuver.  Breaking future cops' hearts has got to feel so good.  Fuck the police.

strangefires

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #208 on: December 02, 2010, 12:20:40 PM »
thank you rawbertson

pmatute

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Re: FUCK !
« Reply #209 on: December 02, 2010, 01:33:46 PM »
Made my day.