Author Topic: Skatepark Locals  (Read 3628 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Latarian Milton

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 272
  • Rep: 34
  • SLAP OG SLAP OG : Been around since SLAP was a mag.
Skatepark Locals
« on: January 27, 2011, 11:57:17 PM »
Let's hear about the local weirdos at your skatepark...

redhatchet

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 520
  • Rep: 44
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #1 on: January 28, 2011, 12:15:13 AM »
Fuck. Where to start. At the closest outdoor park I normally go to, there is this character I'm sure everyone has seen. White dude, who seems to be confused and thinks he's rapper. I mean, the park would stop and marvel at this dumbass "freestyle battle" other idiots. Always showed up with no skateboard and would bug other kids until they let him ride down the bank on theirs. But the last time I saw him we were all sort of sitting on our boards to the side of the park talking and chatting it up. For some reason he comes and sits down right next to my buddy who is sitting beside me. We are talking and all of a sudden he bolts up holding his mouth with his hand. He makes it to the grass and releases the puke he was holding back. Everyone laughed at what ever the fuck just happened. He laughed and shrugged and mumbled something about drinking/smoking too much. (mind you it's only abotu 4pm on a weekday).

To top it all off his phone flew out of his pocket when he jumped up, and he didn't notice. So i pretty much set it down in the parking lot about 15 ft. away. Looking back, I dont know if he ever found it or even noticed it missing.
Maybe I'm just so cool I wanna die.

Hercules Rockefeller

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 8374
  • Rep: -13
  • i`m a double-bacon-genius-burger.
  • Bronze Topic Start Bronze Topic Start : Start a topic with over 1,000 replies.
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #2 on: January 28, 2011, 12:45:32 AM »
you sure pranked jereme good.

redhatchet

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 520
  • Rep: 44
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2011, 12:49:04 AM »
I sure did. He knows better than to come around these parts again.

I figured someone would say something about the last part of the story, but that's what happened so I left it in there. Not trying to sound hard or anything.  ;)
Maybe I'm just so cool I wanna die.

Mein Fuhrer! I can walk!

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 2076
  • Rep: -152
  • 138
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #4 on: January 28, 2011, 12:58:40 AM »
This is my park. Apart from myself, the only locals there are a group of 13-year olds who hang/skate there with some 13-year old girls to impress. They're alright, they're respectful and stuff. Just 13 years old..
Sometimes I can convince 1 or 2 friends who either barely skate anymore or live farther away to come skate with me there. It's 5min board riding from my house, so it's easy access for me.

The most annoying "locals" are probably just the lurkers who don't skate. They sometimes come in groups of 10 to drink/break glass bottles of wodka and they inhale lighter gas. Really fun crowd.
I went there yesterday, and I really had to look hard for a piece of asphalt that didn't have glass on it. The park was covered with glass bottles.

redhatchet

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 520
  • Rep: 44
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #5 on: January 28, 2011, 01:02:19 AM »
^So bummed towns can get away with calling places like that a "skatepark"^
Maybe I'm just so cool I wanna die.

TheFreshSC

  • Guest
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #6 on: January 28, 2011, 01:10:30 AM »
Colorado parks are more fun cause there are juggalos. California lurkers are boring and predictable. I enjoy the company of juggalos for they are easy to troll.

buttpirate

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 598
  • Rep: 32
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #7 on: January 28, 2011, 01:32:04 AM »
the park I frequented years ago had an older guy named Danny the Dirt.  He looked like bam, had an eyebrow piercing, wore wifebeaters, and was always attempting varial flips into 50-50s.  His ultimate trick was a fly out early grab backflip, after which he would then turn around to see who was watching. 

Fiona was a fifteen year old park ho, that enjoyed the attention of 13 year old skate rats, but longed for something deeper and more refined.   

Over the course of a particularly hot summer (and many backflips), Danny and Fiona fell in love.  He got her hooked on meth and pills, and then impregnated her.  the last time I saw them she had a forehead like this:





sometimes in the hushed afterglow of an evening sesh, I wonder if there is a Danny Jr. somewhere gearing up to take over the skate world.

mandibleclaw

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 2683
  • Rep: 559
  • "RIP to myself one day." -jereme rogers
    • mandible claw avatar image
  • Silver Topic Start Silver Topic Start : Start a topic with over 5,000 replies.
    Gold Topic Start Gold Topic Start : Start a topic with over 10,000 replies.
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #8 on: January 28, 2011, 01:53:17 AM »
i once saw a dude trying to fuck his helmet through the hole on top.  styrofoam padding....
Quote
We are a noble sport more noble than any other

iliketoskateboardandstuff

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 148
  • Rep: -10
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #9 on: January 28, 2011, 03:10:20 AM »
The closest park here's locals are great. One is this fat kid that comes wielding a longboard, not riding it, just carrying it. He arrives and proceeds to bother anybody skating with stories about how tough his cousins are and how he's from the city, so he's really really tough. Then you have the asian biker/fruitbooter, he's okay in moderation. The whitest black kid ever also goes there, he bikes the pyramid and only the pyramid and thats about it. Lame as fuck.

Donkey Lips

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 8471
  • Rep: 1019
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #10 on: January 28, 2011, 04:59:27 AM »
Yeah, sorry about that bro. I'll leave the longboard home next time.

ALT

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1557
  • Rep: 124
  • SLAP OG SLAP OG : Been around since SLAP was a mag.
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #11 on: January 28, 2011, 05:49:27 AM »
This is my park. Apart from myself, the only locals there are a group of 13-year olds who hang/skate there with some 13-year old girls to impress. They're alright, they're respectful and stuff. Just 13 years old..
Sometimes I can convince 1 or 2 friends who either barely skate anymore or live farther away to come skate with me there. It's 5min board riding from my house, so it's easy access for me.

The most annoying "locals" are probably just the lurkers who don't skate. They sometimes come in groups of 10 to drink/break glass bottles of wodka and they inhale lighter gas. Really fun crowd.
I went there yesterday, and I really had to look hard for a piece of asphalt that didn't have glass on it. The park was covered with glass bottles.

This is pretty much exactly the same as here. Shitty pre-fab park and all.

Except they built a small shelter next to the park that the groups of shitheads are always in. Literally no matter what time of the day you go down there you are guaranteed to find someone in it.

And as for the little kids that skate. There is this one group of three that are always together. One only ever wheres purple supra high tops, one only has a longboard and just rides it in circles around the park and wears flip-flops all year round. And the last is an obese kid that skates a Blind mini board and just stands still at the side trying varial flips

Mein Fuhrer! I can walk!

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 2076
  • Rep: -152
  • 138
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #12 on: January 28, 2011, 06:36:44 AM »
I once sent that photo to thrasher, hoping it'd make a certified piece of suck. But no dice

ChildOfTheBurbs

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 601
  • Rep: -65513
  • Bronze Topic Start Bronze Topic Start : Start a topic with over 1,000 replies.
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #13 on: January 28, 2011, 06:42:12 AM »
Park locals = showoffs = kooks

They skate there everyday, get good, and when new people come they start busting out all the tricks they've learned within 15 minutes, all while smiling.


Star Whores Episode I: The Fellatio Menace

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 3479
  • Rep: 223
  • SLAP OG SLAP OG : Been around since SLAP was a mag.
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #14 on: January 28, 2011, 06:48:02 AM »
this one kid that always wears a leather vest and a home made deathwish tattoo who always tries to kickflip down this one slant and freaks out every time he doesn't land it.

he sort of looks like Jay from Jay and silent bob but a lot shorter
if post- retirement duke nukem bagged that azz i have a chance too

Beeda Weeda

  • Guest
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #15 on: January 28, 2011, 08:32:32 AM »
drunk doug, just got out of jail. dude scared the shit outa me.

Grubby Mits

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1439
  • Rep: -76
  • kim you need to leave him
  • Bronze Topic Start Bronze Topic Start : Start a topic with over 1,000 replies.
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #16 on: January 28, 2011, 09:22:34 AM »
Where do we start...

This guy called Rob frequents the local park, and i swear to god he must have some sort of mental disabilities. I can't even begin to describe what he looks like, so i've attached a video below my friend filmed on the sly. Such stories from him include:

.Being sponsored by JJB sports (a discount sports store, sells umbro etc)

.That he just watched people skating for 8 years before starting, which makes him better. He is 'Old Skool' because flips are gay

.He is going to open up a skateshop with a butchers inside it. Yes you read that right.

.He 'drew policeman blood' with a phone charger

.When he is pro he is going to make an advert where he '360 bonelesses a firepit' and shouts 'HEY KIDS, THATS HOW I ROLL'

.He tried to fight me over my own doughnut that i dropped on the floor, claiming he was going to eat that

.I once called him up as a prank claiming to be a girl and told him to come meet me, he said he was in scotland (i live by london), but to give him half an hour

.He told us he lost his virginity on the american exchange with the school. This story was very long and detailed. There is no american exchange.

.He has a protege who is about 10 years old and dresses just like him and also does one footed (other foot on the floor) primo crazy flips to jump on the board. I feel for the kid.


YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.
granted he can pop shuvit


On to trollboy. He is literally the scum of the nation, he has no input to society whatsoever.

.He got kicked out at 16 and the council gave him a flat. He has never had a job. He 'sorts draws', in other words he picks up ganj for little kid from dealers so they will bring him in.

.Because he spends all of his life at the skatepark drinking cider he can actually ride a skateboard, bmx, blades and scooter to an ok standard, but with the worst style you have ever seen

.I once called him gremlin and instead of getting angry he said, 'YOU DICKHEAD! Get it right its trollboy', yes he looks just like a troll

.He only had one girlfriend and that was because the girl wanted him to knockout this other local who punched the girl in the face for pushing him after he threw a wheel at her. Trollboy did nothing.


Hmm theres dirty danny who

.wears the same clothes for a month

.got bummed behind a supermarket

.smells of shit


I'll think of more later

« Last Edit: January 28, 2011, 09:45:40 AM by Grubby Mits »

Donkey Lips

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 8471
  • Rep: 1019
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #17 on: January 28, 2011, 09:28:52 AM »
trollboy sounds awesome.

strangefires

  • Guest
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #18 on: January 28, 2011, 09:34:04 AM »
ugh if my city built a prefab park i'd be inclined to just burn it down

dolphinstyle.

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1464
  • Rep: 113
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #19 on: January 28, 2011, 09:38:36 AM »
This is my park. Apart from myself, the only locals there are a group of 13-year olds who hang/skate there with some 13-year old girls to impress. They're alright, they're respectful and stuff. Just 13 years old..
Sometimes I can convince 1 or 2 friends who either barely skate anymore or live farther away to come skate with me there. It's 5min board riding from my house, so it's easy access for me.

The most annoying "locals" are probably just the lurkers who don't skate. They sometimes come in groups of 10 to drink/break glass bottles of wodka and they inhale lighter gas. Really fun crowd.
I went there yesterday, and I really had to look hard for a piece of asphalt that didn't have glass on it. The park was covered with glass bottles.


Aren't you from Antwerpen? Phil Zwijsen said in a recent interview that this city is full of awesome concrete parks...
Look, I'm an individual within us, partaking in this business

dankradschwag

  • Guest
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #20 on: January 28, 2011, 09:40:41 AM »
there was this older mexican dude that called himself wicked and he did a bunch of the pressure flips where you run next to it and he did these freestyle casper flip out things and even popped his board into his hands and pretended it was a guitar and he always did the westside hand gesture thing to symbolize his name

Mein Fuhrer! I can walk!

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 2076
  • Rep: -152
  • 138
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #21 on: January 28, 2011, 09:42:46 AM »
Antwerp has 2 really good parks. One has bowls and pools and is real sick. But I live 40km from antwerp. 45min bus ride and half hour car. I can't drive, so that leaves me with option 1. I study in Antwerp, so when the weather's good and I have the time/people to join me I go there as much as I can.

spool of cord

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1797
  • Rep: 47
  • Welcome to another chapter of audio sodemy
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #22 on: January 28, 2011, 09:46:55 AM »
here's an old pic of my hometown park from either summer of 99 or 2000



big dude walking in the middle is Jimbo. Jimbo's been tormenting the youth of town since the mid 90s, and other than a stint in jail (I wanna say 2002-2007) he's always ruled in his ways of king of the park. no one fucks with this guy. countless amounts of fights and bloodshed have been caused by his angry presence. he's been with the same girl for 14 years, and they now have a kid. The last time I saw him was last fall, and he brought his kid down to the park in a stroller, took the blanket off the baby, and underneath the blanket were probably 20 bottles of different prescription drugs he brought to peddle to kids.



edit: the park really looked like shit back then. here's a photo from 2003 showing how much its improved!

sanch dont be mad because your wife used to clean my mansion

and................... your still a mark!!!!!

chillout

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1528
  • Rep: 9
  • beer
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #23 on: January 28, 2011, 11:53:34 AM »
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQXKAIONVAc

my park consists of a special ed kid and chaz ortiz. and about 50 kids in middle school that never shut up.

Joust Ostrich

  • Trade Count: (+2)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 6037
  • Rep: 662
  • Speculatnaciousness?
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #24 on: January 30, 2011, 11:33:52 AM »
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQXKAIONVAc

my park consists of a special ed kid and chaz ortiz. and about 50 kids in middle school that never shut up.

The scene at your park appears to kick ass.  Mind if I ask where it is?
I'm posting from my blackberry wtf?!?!?

Giovanni Falcone

  • Guest
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #25 on: January 30, 2011, 11:50:28 AM »
The funny thing in Washington and how it's been for like 20 years, the skatepark local is probably some dude who sucks at skating. He just fucking mobs, dresses like he's in some 80's glam rock band, and listens to gangsta rap.

Skater Austin

  • Guest
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #26 on: January 30, 2011, 11:59:08 AM »
The Local park is cool.  Nobody comes just to sit around and not skate.  No skate park whores at my park. But some 13 year old kid always bugs me and other people for weed and cigarettes even know i have never brought either to the park. He alwys brags about going to "Raves". Yesterday some dude got a BJ under  a  tree by the park.  Go somewhere else for that shit.  The older guys are cool.  I hate it when people come to the park to fight, go  somewhere else if you want to fight, not here. I hope my park never turns into a daycare like some have.

chillout

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1528
  • Rep: 9
  • beer
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #27 on: January 30, 2011, 04:19:42 PM »
Expand Quote
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQXKAIONVAc

my park consists of a special ed kid and chaz ortiz. and about 50 kids in middle school that never shut up.
[close]

The scene at your park appears to kick ass.?  Mind if I ask where it is?

haha. its in west dundee, il. and im not gonna lie, it is infinite fun and laughs

Gnarwhal

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1521
  • Rep: -20
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #28 on: January 30, 2011, 04:35:15 PM »
The park by me would be pretty sick if it wasnt for the fruitbooters. They come if groups of 5+, have the wildest attire (baggy jean shorts, striped socks, football jerseys a few sizes too big, ect), and they fucking vibe out all the skaters like they own the place.   There's also this guy who ive never seen skate whose there almost everyday.  One day he got called out on never skating and tried to drop in on the fourteen foot section of the bowl and jacked up both his knees.  We all had to help get him out, but no way to get him to the hospital so he phoned up his grandma and she took him to the hospital. The best part was he came back to the park the next day in a fucking wheel chair!

DEDBBIS

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1256
  • Rep: -76
Re: Skatepark Locals
« Reply #29 on: January 30, 2011, 10:02:45 PM »
YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.
YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.
This guy has worked at Baby's R Us for five years but in his off time enjoys forcing kids to fight each other, chasing kids around with a taser, and beating up thirteen year olds on their birthday. He moved on to another park a few years ago but I hear he's still true to his old ways.

Another park I go to is filled with BMX kids who can't show up without some piece of Monster clothing. They like to bring iPod speakers and bless everyone with their favorite trance playlists. I think the energy drinks stunted brain development.

There ain't no shit on T.V. tonight