Author Topic: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding  (Read 25164 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

dolphinstyle.

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1465
  • Rep: 114
If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« on: November 29, 2012, 07:46:38 AM »
At this very moment, a social media shitstorm is happening. A German magazine for middle aged, sexually frustrated women, "Brigitte", posted an article which immediately caused hundreds of comments. The editors erased it and said that the users were too offensive. Now the show goes on on Facebook. Here is my translation of the said article:

"Grown men who skateboard: Get off, man!

Skateboarding is cool for little boys ? but not for grown men in the eyes of brigitte.de author Bianka Echtermeyer.

There are things which cause aggressive behavior in me. This has to happen unconsciously, because the reasons are not immediately clear to me. When I moved from the fancy Hamburg/Eppendorf to the hip Hamburg/St. Pauli, they were suddenly there: grown men who skateboard. They were together with other grown men and little boys, which were obviously not their sons. I love the Kiez (famous nightlife area in Hamburg) and its crazyness. Even the tourists don?t bother me much. However, when I see men way older than 25 who glue a skateboard between themselves and the ground, they cause me to see red. Very often, they are guys who wear a weird bangs haircut, never smile and smell like last night?s party. I would love to pull them by their graying hair and yell at them: ?Stop it! You?re way too old for that.?

Skateboards belong to little boys. End of story. Not to people who pay taxes and frequent an orthopedist. Men older than 30, who want to let off steam, can drive fast cars, play soccer or climb trees. I wouldn?t mind that. But please, stop skateboarding. I, too, don?t cross the street wearing a pink tutu. There are some things you grow away from: that?s not bourgeois ? that?s a fact. And let?s be honest: being an adult isn?t that bad at all. I promise."

here the original in German:
"Erwachsene M?nner, die Skateboard fahren: Steig ab, Mann!
Skateboard fahren ist cool f?r kleine Jungs. Nicht f?r erwachsene M?nner findet, BRIGITTE.de-Redakteurin Bianka Echtermeyer.

Es gibt Dinge, die l?sen bei mir gro?e Aggressionen aus. Das muss unterbewusst vorgehen, denn die Gr?nde sind mir zun?chst nicht immer klar. Als ich in Hamburg umgezogen bin - vom schicken Eppendorf ins hippe St. Pauli - waren sie pl?tzlich da: erwachsene M?nner, die Skateboard fahren. Zusammen mit anderen erwachsenen M?nnern und kleinen Jungen, die aber offensichtlich nicht ihre S?hne waren. Ich liebe den Kiez und seine Verr?cktheit. Sogar die Touristen st?ren mich nicht. Aber bei M?nnern jenseits der 25, die ein Board zwischen sich und das Pflaster kleben, sehe ich nur noch Rot. Das sind oft Typen, die eine schr?ge Pony-Frisur tragen, nie l?cheln und nach der Party von letzter Nacht riechen. Am liebsten w?rde ich die am ergrauten Schopf packen und anschreien: "H?r auf damit! Daf?r bist du zu alt."

Skateboards geh?ren zu kleinen Jungs. Basta. Nicht zu Menschen, die selbst Steuern zahlen und beim Orthop?den in Behandlung sind. Falls sich M?nner ?ber 30 austoben wollen, k?nnen sie gern schnelle Autos fahren, Fu?ball spielen oder auf B?ume klettern. Das st?rt mich nicht. Aber lasst bitte die Skateboards in Ruhe. Ich laufe ja auch nicht im rosa Tutu ?ber die Stra?e. Aus manchen Dingen w?chst man einfach raus: Das ist nicht spie?ig, das ist so. Und ehrlich: Erwachsen sein ist gar nicht schlimm. Versprochen. "

And here's the Facebook page:
http://www.facebook.com/Brigitte



« Last Edit: November 29, 2012, 01:24:30 PM by dolphinstyle. »
Look, I'm an individual within us, partaking in this business

fulfillthedream

  • Trade Count: (+2)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 4666
  • Rep: 312
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #1 on: November 29, 2012, 07:48:46 AM »
Dat bitch dumb
Skateboarding is like jacking-off, it's that good- Jeremy Klein

[

coop D.O.G.G.

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1144
  • Rep: -100
  • I'm thirsty
  • SLAP OG SLAP OG : Been around since SLAP was a mag.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #2 on: November 29, 2012, 07:53:12 AM »
The pink tutu comparison made no sense. That's not something a man should grow out of with age; that's just something boys should probably not wear at all. Obviously, this guy has issues. His aggression seems a bit over the top. Let's just leave him alone.
and here comes coop dogg.....................

FrenchFuck

  • Guest
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #3 on: November 29, 2012, 07:53:49 AM »
This is so stupid it doesn't even warrant a response.

kellen

  • Guest
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #4 on: November 29, 2012, 07:54:54 AM »
What the fuck is this shit

dolphinstyle.

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1465
  • Rep: 114
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #5 on: November 29, 2012, 07:55:12 AM »
The pink tutu comparison made no sense. That's not something a man should grow out of with age; that's just something boys should probably not wear at all. Obviously, this guy has issues. His aggression seems a bit over the top. Let's just leave him alone.
It's a woman. And yeah, too many things in there which make no fucking sense.
Look, I'm an individual within us, partaking in this business

BRIX SKWIKZ

  • Guest
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #6 on: November 29, 2012, 07:56:51 AM »
YEAH SK8BOARDING IS GAY

KennedyPowers

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 183
  • Rep: -5
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #7 on: November 29, 2012, 08:06:15 AM »
This is so stupid it doesn't even warrant a response.
/thread

Obama doesn't want you to watch free porn, too much masturbation is slowing the economic recovery

Camp Grunge

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 326
  • Rep: -7
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #8 on: November 29, 2012, 08:14:25 AM »
guaranteed the woman who wrote this is ugly

The Nose Face

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1358
  • Rep: 8
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #9 on: November 29, 2012, 08:15:50 AM »
63 Years Young


Box of Frogs

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 712
  • Rep: 7
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #10 on: November 29, 2012, 08:26:46 AM »
So she hates longboarders too?


Erica's boyfriend is stealing our erica and our dylan! fuck that guy!

sammyseeds

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 183
  • Rep: 3
  • eat, spit, be happy.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #11 on: November 29, 2012, 08:30:32 AM »
quitting skateboarding to go play soccer with the real men who flop around when someone gets aggressive

Choad Muskrat

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 4535
  • Rep: 522
  • SLAP OG SLAP OG : Been around since SLAP was a mag.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #12 on: November 29, 2012, 08:31:11 AM »
Oh shit, i better stop then :(

paraquat

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 4159
  • Rep: 200
  • SLAP OG SLAP OG : Been around since SLAP was a mag.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #13 on: November 29, 2012, 08:41:21 AM »
newsflash: Paraquat quits Skateboarding because German women with too much money and nothing to write about said it isn't appropriate.

Manolo

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 3317
  • Rep: 467
    •  avatar image
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #14 on: November 29, 2012, 08:41:34 AM »
All these years i knew something was wrong,but my eyes are opened now,i just need a lamborghini.

cant stop

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1904
  • Rep: -76
  • It's all about tricks.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #15 on: November 29, 2012, 08:46:35 AM »
I would like to see a picture of the author of that article so I know that my prejudices are correct.
You know what sucks? I always rip my pants when Im having a good time! - The Gonz

Merked

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1373
  • Rep: -157
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #16 on: November 29, 2012, 08:48:22 AM »
I would like to see a picture of the author of that article so I know that my prejudices are correct.

Dude, your sig had me fucking dieing.  lol, soo fucking good.
I suck at SLAP.

FranklinSt4Ever

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 252
  • Rep: 4
  • SLAP OG SLAP OG : Been around since SLAP was a mag.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #17 on: November 29, 2012, 08:55:08 AM »
So skateboarding is a good way to avoid dating/having sex with women?

Seems like I made the right choice in skateboarding.

Box of Frogs

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 712
  • Rep: 7
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #18 on: November 29, 2012, 09:00:41 AM »
So skateboarding is a good way to avoid dating/having sex with women?

Seems like I made the right choice in skateboarding.

You didnt know that already? The sex part I mean. Obviously


Erica's boyfriend is stealing our erica and our dylan! fuck that guy!

somethingmustbreaknow

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 5296
  • Rep: 490
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #19 on: November 29, 2012, 09:02:49 AM »


for those asking, that's basically how she looks.

thepman

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 2043
  • Rep: -94
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #20 on: November 29, 2012, 09:03:24 AM »
i'm just gonna quit skateboarding and go climb a tree
skating is all about choosing your outfit very deliberately, going out in public. looking super sick. and then riding your board a little bit

natenola forever

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 2665
  • Rep: 118
  • SLAP OG SLAP OG : Been around since SLAP was a mag.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #21 on: November 29, 2012, 09:10:38 AM »
The pink tutu comparison made no sense. That's not something a man should grow out of with age; that's just something boys should probably not wear at all. Obviously, this guy has issues. His aggression seems a bit over the top. Let's just leave him alone.
Here in New Orleans theres plenty of middle aged woman or older crossing the street wearing pink tutus and other ridiculous get ups.

Jack Klompis

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 295
  • Rep: 53
  • you want the pen??
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #22 on: November 29, 2012, 09:14:05 AM »
dudes who climb trees are gettin trim?? didn't help me when i was a young buck, must be something that women don't appreciate til they're older, like spending time in the kitchen or self respect, about to update my facebook interests, hope i get laid soon!!! fingers crossed
look who's eating dinner at 6 o'clock

Seamus_McShamebag

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1368
  • Rep: 855
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #23 on: November 29, 2012, 09:16:06 AM »
What? Are you trying to tell me that there are close minded conformists in Germany that are angered by diversity?  No fucking way.  This almost suggests that there might be a cultural tendency to be manipulated into believing that something someone does purely for their own enjoyment and well being is wrong and will inevitably lead to the degradation of society.  Never. 


nutsack nipples

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 118
  • Rep: 8
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #24 on: November 29, 2012, 09:16:35 AM »
i'm in it for the little boys

GAY

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 15974
  • Rep: 3325
  • Those that SLAP, can't.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #25 on: November 29, 2012, 09:18:52 AM »

Backside LameFlip

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 106
  • Rep: -16
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #26 on: November 29, 2012, 09:20:20 AM »
Haters hate only the things they can't have and the people they can't be.

foureyedjim

  • Guest
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #27 on: November 29, 2012, 09:21:13 AM »
It's true, every skateboarder should just skate fast and hard till they're 25 then pull a bob burnquist and skate off into the grand canyon minus the parachute.

ChronicBluntSlider

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • SLAP Pal
  • ******
  • Posts: 1750
  • Rep: 76
  • Bronze Topic Start Bronze Topic Start : Start a topic with over 1,000 replies.
    Silver Topic Start Silver Topic Start : Start a topic with over 5,000 replies.
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #28 on: November 29, 2012, 09:25:42 AM »
What's stupid is that she says its Ok to play soccer. That's a kid's game too, only it is old/popular enough to be more culturally accepted form of exercise for adults. Are bicycles acceptable? 

KP

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 361
  • Rep: 16
Re: If you're older than 25: stop skateboarding
« Reply #29 on: November 29, 2012, 09:40:27 AM »
All these years i knew something was wrong,but my eyes are opened now,i just need a lamborghini.
haha

for real, that girl is as ugly as some angry4life german lady is expected to be.