one time i had to stay with my pastor and his wife cuz my mom was off island. i nearly always sleep naked, and i did at their place. one night, i couldn't sleep, so i thought it'd be cool to sneak all ninja like past their room, and past the living room, into the kitchen to get a glass of water. i got past everything and made it to the kitchen and started looking for a glass when suddenly the tv turned on in the living room. it was just some white noise, and i was freaking out because it was like midnight and i was ass naked in my pastor's kitchen. well, it ended up he was sleeping on the couch and i somehow woke him. i thought maybe i could crawl into a cupboard or something, but i just froze there, in a ball, covering whatever i could. he came in and turned on the light and was like "what is going on? i don't even want to hear it, go to sleep." so me and my 13 year old naked butt booked it back to my bedroom and closed the door.
then the next day WHEN HE DROVE ME TO SCHOOL he asked me if i knew about masturbation... wtf. i tried to convince him i was sleepwalking or something but it wasn't flying.
i still can't imagine to this day what exactly it is he thought i was doing... naked in his kitchen...