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Skateboarding => USELESS WOODEN TOY BANTER => Topic started by: Bobby Peru on June 10, 2013, 09:43:44 AM
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Jake Johnson is ready to answer your questions. Sign up, log in, and ask him anything. We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
(http://www.slapmagazine.com/media/k2/items/cache/f84800a57d3e3a5f2516c71fdc657da9_L.jpg)
Will you give us a tour of your van?
What's your best dumpster find?
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Wassup with Brengar? Will we see a resurgence of his much-anticipated return to the filmer ranks or has the party life swallowed him hole?
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Were you involved in picking the song for your Mind Field part?
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What are yout thoughts on Dill and AVE leaving Workshop?
If you could choose a shoe sponsor to ride for, who would it be?
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How many girls have you banged in total? (rough estimate)
Ass or boobs?
If you could punch one pro skater/personality in the face, with no repercussions who would you hit?
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Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and played a girl bunny?
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Any stories from when you guys skated Puerto Rico? I know there has to be some... and would you do it again?
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Do you currently have any footage involving landed handstands or plan on filming any handstands?
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^^Firing line.
Should girls skateboard?
Out of all the local scenes you've visited, which ones were the best? Which ones sucked?
Are you filming a part with Strobeck for his "upcoming" video?
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What was the situation with Gravis?
Are you currently filming for anything?
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What board co. would you want to ride for if you and AWS parted ways?
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Do you see gilbert crockett as alien workshop's new pappalardo?
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The other week my car overheated and the hydraulics in my hood were not working, I used your boards to prop it up and my car suddenly started working. I know of a few other people that have used your board for non skate related things and it has helped them in mysterious ways. Have you heard about your boards special powers? The graphik.....
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does nike, adidas, cons, new balance belong in skateboarding???
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Who is your favorite Scumco team rider aside from Downey
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You mentioned in your Quartersnacks interview that you were filming a VX-part on your own, is that anything we will see anytime soon?
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what do you and the AWS guys do for fun when not skating?
does anyone make fun of gilbert crockett for wearing the same blue button down in all his footage?
how many people did you make out with on KOTR?
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How much residual trim did you find casted off of Dylan reider?
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Also, did child of the ghetto ever hit you up to play that game of skate?
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As a skater from central PA, how did growing up in State College shape the way that you approach skateboarding and obstacles.
What did you do during the winter months?
What are your favorite spots in State College?
As a huge fan of your trick selection and coverage, I would like to know what do you feel you bring to skateboarding that is different.
It seems that you are very interested in keeping the nature of street skating intact, especially through your work with the Map Masquerade tour. This promoted a sense of discovered and connecting, so how do you feel about the role of skate plazas and the progression of skate parks that serve as a simulation of the streets? Is anything lost or gained?
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Regular or switch wallrides?
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How annoying was that bush above that brick double set you did the wallride over in Mindfield?
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Is it true that you never bring your Board or any other Skate Stuff on Skate trips because you're too lazy? One of your Teammates told me you always bum gear from fellow Teamriders and on the last day you give that setup to some random kid and fly home.
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What do you think of corporate skate shops?
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I don't want to ask a question I just want to give mega props to the female-pulling machine that was Jake Johnson on KOTR
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I know you do a lot of traveling of your own to small towns on the east coast, what has been your favorite small town you visited for skating?
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Do you like mexico ? what place did you like more ?
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what's the secret for wallrides?
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last Pops sighting?
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Can you explain the incident that quartersnacks reported about you going missing?
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Did you get yourself checked after all the make outs on the KOTR? Would you do KOTR again (and the making out)?
Ass or tits?
What's your setup? Do you really ride Destructo's?
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What books have you read lately? How many pro skaters are into literature as much as you?
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Why don't you post on slap more often?
Any plans for another Map Masquerade type trip in the near future?
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Top 3 cup sole shoes you've enjoyed over the years?
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What was your secret for making out with so many women during KOTR? What would you say to them beforehand?
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What is the best wallride variation that you have seen?
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Yo jake, dis ya boy Nick Daggal and I GOTS to know... Which way do you swing politically, and DON'T be shy.
Also, any straight up kooks you've met in the industry?
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how do you feel about street league type events? do you think they're ruining skateboarding? what if the skateboarding is in the olympics?
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Hi Jake,
What board size do you riding?
And whats your shoe sponsor now?
And last question: whats your sponsors now?
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How did you end up skating to "My Girls"?
What are your thoughts about the infowars.com collaboration that Alien did?
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Do you want to come over for tea and crumpets?
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Want to buy some raincoats?
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Have you ever skated the UK if so/not do you plan to skate here soon?
If you could kick anyone on Alien in the balls who would it be?
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last Pops sighting?
This.
Also, wondering if you plan on skating Toronto or any other Canadian cities in the coming months?
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i can't think of anything to ask so i'm creeping on your facebook right now. does your brother in the workshop shirt and striped hoody skate?
all 3 family members in this photo are wearing stripes and you aren't, do you sometimes feel like you don't belong?
this comment was from 2012 but what is Whipple and how do you get free shirts from there?
are you going to delete your facebook now?
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what are your thoughts on the ancient alien theory ?
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In lieu of Nyjah's recent comment about girls in skateboarding, what do you think? Should girls be able to shred?
Do you really not mean to care about material things, like a social status? Like the song in your mindfield part suggests?
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Where was your favorite spot to skate on long island?
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Puleo or Oyola?
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why do you kiss like you're eating a real juicy peach?
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why did you only have a lifestyle shot and not a skate photo in the new thrasher?
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Video parts are you currently working on?
What influences your trick selection?
Favorite Tour? (Why? Please share stories).
How long did the process of rehabilitating your knee take; any pointers? Are there some tricks you were unable to re-learn to this day?
Local company(s) you are most siked on?
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Pros and cons of long term van living?
Top five video parts, past or present.
Do you think there is a growing reaction to the modern state of skating, where skaters are taking things back to an individual level?
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where is zoltan?
did i see you miss the 28 by sf state one night?
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Under what circumstances you would accept an energy drink sponsorship contract?
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why do you kiss like you're eating a real juicy peach?
HAHA a friend of mine watched KOTR and found that very disturbing.Whatever tho eat chicks faces, Jake.
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At the end of the day, does it really matter?
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how high can you ollie?
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Favorite books (fiction or non-fiction)? I can't remember, but did you go to college? If not, what led you to you applying cultural criticism and analysis to skateboarding and skating subculture (whether intentionally or unintentionally)?
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what's the scariest trick you've ever done?
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who are you?
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will you become my best friend?
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What do you think about the quality of interviews that are currently in skatemags compared to the interviews of the past?
Also what your thoughts on the way that skateboard brands and skaters market themselves as skateboarding grows.
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do you have herpes after kotr?
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What's your favorite Energy Drink?
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If you were not a Pro skater . What kind of job would you be interested in and want to do for a living
What kind of food are you into ? type of restaurants , fast food and nationality
Would you be willing to go eat at a fine dining restaurant for a 11 course meal for 3 hours ? or too out of character
have a good one dude !
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Would you sign a 5 year contract with Nike and Plan B, for $100,000 per year? (total, not each)
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Do you believe John Steinbecks 1940's novella "the moon is down" was a philosophical success despite lacking both dynamic characters and a dynamic plot? If not explain. Free max b?
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Who were your favorite skaters growing up?
Do you take credit for starting the "huge ass wallride trend"? Because you totally should.
I have a theory that tall skaters love Brain Anderson the same way that short black guys love Allen Iverson, confirm or deny?
The Quiksilver team was raw as fuck in the late 00's. Do you wish there would have been a full video?
Was that girl you kissed in Texas the prettiest McDonald's employee in company history?
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What was more fun, map masquerade tour or king of the road?
Plans on doing either of them again?
Who/what are some of your current influences in and out of skating?
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What are some of your favorite books/authors?
What is the typical Jake Johnson day consists of?
Do you do yoga?
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what is your view on twinks
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On a scale of 1 to 10 how much does Dill love himself?
One being not much, and ten being more that any human in history.
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How tall are you?
You seem like a pretty educated person amongst all the other brainless skateboarders I usually encounter. Do you ever think about going through school?
I love you.
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weirder sponsor-
heath on hookups
or
ricky oyola on lost (surfwear)
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have you ever bombed the canton ave hill in pitt??? on anything without breaks that looks terrifying...
do you have more gay(lesbian,bi,transgender) or black friends?
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is it difficult juggling two physically demanding full time jobs?
(http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7391/9012078129_43bdd0b197.jpg)
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last meal?
best non skate movie of all time?
would you date a chick that was really into muscle cars?
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What do you know about earthships?
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did you ever own a pair of d3's or chet thomas globes
if so, can we have a photo
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two trains leave a city at the same time. One travels east and the other west. The train traveling west is going 50km faster than the eastbound train, in 2 hours they are 300kms apart. How fast are they going?
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My friends and I saw you riding a BMX bike at the library in SF. We were cordial but made no mention of your identity (while debating if it was actually you when you were wallriding everything). My curiosity is in both your interest in BMX and your experiences interacting with skaters while BMXing.
What got you into riding BMX? Do you find it influencing your skating?
What goes through your mind when skaters vibe you out on a BMX bike? Anyone ever vibe you out, then adjust their behavior when they realize you are the double J? Do you ever test the waters and approach a group of skaters to see their reaction to a BMXer? I would probably turn it into a social experiment for fun if I were you.
Anywho, that was probably too long to address.
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Who is your favorite former Alien rider?
How was it riding for Gravis?
Did you have a pro shoe in the works before they pulled the plug?
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do you even booze?
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You are oft regarded as skateboarding's babyjesus,
of gold, frankincense and myrrh, what would you prefer?
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whats your favorite question
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What are some necessities for van life? Positives and Negatives?
What is your favorite memory of skateboarding thus far?
What is your opinion of Nyjah Huston? Skating or otherwise
Any upcoming local videos you're looking forward to? By what means do you go about discovering skate videos from peoples local scenes that you may not have been to?
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You know my buddy Jarrett Hodick. He is went to State College. What do you think of him?
What is your favorite skate part of all time?
When are you and Nestor Judkins coming back to the Lehigh Valley?
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I'm hearing rumors left and right of people aside from Dill and AVE leaving Alien, is there any truth to that, and if so, what is going on with Alien?
Shouldn't Lee Yankou be pro?
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Is there any chance of all the GX1000 dudes leaving their respective sponsors and creating a super team?
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Most proud moment skating?
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how many johns could a jake john john if a jake john could jake johns?
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Can we please have this done by the end of 2013?
Would you kiss Berra KOTR style to stop world hunger for a week?
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Do you believe Max B(iggaveli) (aka the Silver surfer aka Wavie Crockett aka Boss Don) should be released from jail?
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Whats up with Austin kanfoush and billy mcfeely?
Any chance you'll draw either of those guys (or somebody else) into the fold now that dill and ave are gone?
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Have you ever skated the UK if so/not do you plan to skate here soon?
He has, I saw him skating Mile End with the Gravis team, he looked like he hated all of them except Sammy Winter.
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Have you ever skated the UK if so/not do you plan to skate here soon?
He has, I saw him skating Mile End with the Gravis team, he looked like he hated all of them except Sammy Winter.
Haha! All the teams end up down south when they visit, need some more trips and demos up here in Manchester
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what do you think about austyn gillette ?
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Wassup with Brengar? Will we see a resurgence of his much-anticipated return to the filmer ranks or has the party life swallowed him hole?
kook
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Do you believe Max B(iggaveli) (aka the Silver surfer aka Wavie Crockett aka Boss Don) should be released from jail?
Free Bossman Don Biggaveli
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Did you end up banging any of the make out chicks from KOTR?
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Ever seen a hipster eat a dollar slice?
Can you explain your connection with Greg Chapman?
Tell us a good Billy Rohan story...
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Do you like scrapple?
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how many questions on this thread are KOTR make-out related?
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what is your favorite city to skate in America? p.s. come to back to Denver
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Are you aware your debut graphic is the greatest graphic in existence?
Are you aware it also has a strong cult following in Richmond, VA?
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honest opinion on Dyrdek?
What do you think of street league?
If Dill was a political leader from the past/present who would he most be like?
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If you could be any rockstar, who would you be?
Tit's or ass man?
Favourite skate trip?
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What's it like street skating with Omar Salazar? Does that guy stop to sesh a spot or just blaze trails hauling ass all the time?
Who is one of the greatest skaters you have skated with? (I'm not talking just deep or tech bag of tricks here) In your opinion, who has just been amazing to watch shred in real life
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As a travelling skateboarder, your always on the move. Are you in a relationship-if so how do you make it work? If not, do you have a girl in every city? Do you see yourself settling down soon?
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also where are you living right now? SF?
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how did you get a prat in the chapman video ?
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do you ever get bummed that your name sounds an awful lot like 'jack johnson'?
if so, will you go out with me?
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How do you balance your skating and acting in that Zooey Deschanel show?
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Yo can you do me a favor?.......an teach me how to dougie?
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if you were to have a midget orgy in your van, how many midgets would you invite?
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Mild or spicy?
Would you ride for Fleshlight?
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I meet this ginger rollerblader, that claimed to have grown up blading Penn State with you. True?
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Read any decent books lately?
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Who is your favorite skateboarder?
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I seem to remember hearing that you really fucked up your leg. How did you get back to full shred capacity after an injury like that?
I been having problems with the fright ever since I fucked up my knee.
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Read any decent books lately?
this and more specifically have you ever read any Rachard Bach books, i dont know you but you seem far out enough to like them.
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As someone who reps PA, have you considered incorporating a Keystone (Rob Mertz style) into any of your graphics?
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Where was your favorite spot to skate on long island?
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Yo Jake, how about a few tricks to go with this Q&A. I know you love to do interviews and philosophize, but are you a pro skateboarder, or Richie Jackson.
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did you bang any of those chicks u macked it with on KOTR?
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Did any of the guys on Alien get bummed you got so much attention from your Mindfield part and did these same individuals get suddenly stoked when you were taken out by your injury?
How important is it for you to go skateboarding on a regular basis? Are you still at skate rat level of passion or do you need to be feeling it to motivate on the roller board?
Do you ever wish you were Westgate-sized or are you comfortable being your size?
Do you have a skateboard-centric undergarment sponsor? If no, would you look into riding for one and modeling them in lifestyle shots posted exclusively to my personal slap messageboard inbox?
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Potatoes or carrots ?
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Have you ever felt bad about masturbating to something after you've done it? What was it?
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What do you make of the Anthony Pappalardo obsession on the Slap boards?
Do you think Anthony is a washed up kook or do you think he made some valid points in his 48 blocks interview?
What do you think it is about the man that makes him such a magnetic figure amongst skate rats?
Please elaborate.
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does skate or die apply to you?
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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, than why is there a song about him?
also
What happened to Darrell Stanton?
shout out to doug fay
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do you nkow you are the best skater
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how good are u at twerking? (answer via demonstration)
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When picking up a hitchhiker would you prefer they bring cash, grass, or ass?
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have you ever watched a street league event?
Do you ever check theberrics.com?
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When was the last time you skated with Brendan Leddy? Any good stories?
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whats the best advice youve gotten for skating?
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why is that some of the best skaters come out in their first video parts showing off their huge bag of tricks and then in later parts start limiting themselves to the ones they get the most notoriety for?
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all of these questions are sooooo bad
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all of these questions are sooooo bad
from the dude who brought you 21 face melting posts today
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i dont get it ^
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Why aren't you doing lateflip variations? All the best dudes in skateboarding are doing them?
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i saw there were a few syracuse clips in your brick harbor video a while back. How'd you end up up there?
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how do we start to expand outside of skating the same obstacles that have been for years (rails, stairs, ledges etc) without becoming un-relate able? Do you think such labels as "circus tricks" restrain the progression of skating to a certain extent?
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When will we see more new footage of you?
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How do u have so much fucking pop ? so amazing
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do you believe in aliens?
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would you let the based god fuck your bitch?
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Can you get your fucking BMX out of my bike room already? Or would you rather I sell it on Ebay to one your loyal SLAP forum dick riders?
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can i have your bmx?
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Ill sell it to you for $300 plus shipping. Not kidding.
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When you were in Syracuse NY how'd it feel to be the first person to kickflip that street gap that was in the Brick Harbor ad? Also how did you like The Everson Museum of Art aka The EVE as a skate spot?
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cupsole or vulcanized?
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Can you get your fucking BMX out of my bike room already? Or would you rather I sell it on Ebay to one your loyal SLAP forum dick riders?
you hate this dude in real life, right?
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Who's got the biggest dick on alien?
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Would you skate to Thee 6 Mafia's Long and Hard?
Three Six Mafia- Long And Hard (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hq_7MUN2go0#)
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Can you get your fucking BMX out of my bike room already? Or would you rather I sell it on Ebay to one your loyal SLAP forum dick riders?
you hate this dude in real life, right?
Not at all. He's a solid (albeit spacey) dude. And his bike has been sitting in my god damned bike room taking up space for a few months. Im only posting it here because he would get a chuckle out of it. Also so everyone on here knows how kewl I am. Wanna be my friend? i'll let you sniff the bike seat for $3!
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Jesse Jane or Kate Upton?
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Who would you want to see in a future episode of Nieratko's Skinema?
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Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Can you get your fucking BMX out of my bike room already? Or would you rather I sell it on Ebay to one your loyal SLAP forum dick riders?
you hate this dude in real life, right?
Not at all. He's a solid (albeit spacey) dude. And his bike has been sitting in my god damned bike room taking up space for a few months. Im only posting it here because he would get a chuckle out of it. Also so everyone on here knows how kewl I am. Wanna be my friend? i'll let you sniff the bike seat for $3!
No, I was asking Jake if he hates you. You are posting it because you're a name dropping faggot.
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sorry, i was posting with a #phatcock in my mouth so forgive me if i mistook your question for something of actual substance. My main goal here is to drop as many names as possible so that the SLAP gods will let me into their inner circle of slow-stroking dude-worship. You are right though, i humble-bragged about knowing a super-kewl pro-bro in hopes that im FINALLY respected here on the SLAP boards. you got me. you win.
A/S/L?
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but for real though, $300 plus shipping and your favorite freegan's BMX is yours. ante up.
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Hey Jake, is it true you're a BMX riding faggot?
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sorry, i was posting with a #phatcock in my mouth so forgive me if i mistook your question for something of actual substance. My main goal here is to drop as many names as possible so that the SLAP gods will let me into their inner circle of slow-stroking dude-worship. You are right though, i humble-bragged about knowing a super-kewl pro-bro in hopes that im FINALLY respected here on the SLAP boards. you got me. you win.
A/S/L?
whats funny is that what you just typed is 100% true.
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Can I get a fucking board or some shit?
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BEING A PRO SKATER IS FUCKING JOKE!!!!!!
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Slap or Big Brother?
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Why aren't all your video parts be like this one?
Quartersnacks: Jake Johnson AKA Ferrari Post-Mind Field Mixtape (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkzsezGKXdg&feature=player_embedded#ws)
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During sex would you rather hear 'must kill president' or 'circuit malfunction'
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Were you still riding for Sometimes Skateboards when the owner of the company was caught on the internet trying to have sex with underage kids?
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i enjoy your skating... that being said, word on the street is that you eat your boogers. care to comment?
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hugs or kisses?
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Can you get your fucking BMX out of my bike room already? Or would you rather I sell it on Ebay to one your loyal SLAP forum dick riders?
are we supposed to be impressed or something?
hate to hurt your ego but youre a faggot
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Do you see skateboarding as a viable long term "profession", or do would you rather just "use the industry" to get some travelling out of it, as well achieve whatever your own skateboarding goals are?
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Why?
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In your recent interview in Thrasher you said
"My vision of skateboarding is something that unites people from various cultures. I don't think the big business aspect will last. it never does. If skateboarders can find a way to break ties with the capitalist model, I think we can unify and influence the world on a deeper level. That's my dream."
Most pros never talk about big picture things - ideas, politics, etc . . . It's rad that you aren't assuming that skaters are stupid.
How should skaters relate to pro skaters? Does the whole celebrity worship thing get creepy?
What are the things in skateboarding that prevents us from uniting with people in other cultures?
Is it insane that people are seriously discussing if females should be allowed to skate?
How can we challenge the sexism in skateboarding culture?
Why do so many skaters say "faggot" so much? Why are homophobic slurs still acceptable in skateboarding culture?
Does social justice have a place in skateboard culture?
Or is the rebellion of skaters limited to tough guy posturing and trying to be offensive while fetishizing products?
What problems are there with capitalism? How does capitalism fuck with what we love about skateboarding?
What examples of skaters (or other people) breaking with capitalist models have you seen that we should look towards?
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Favourite Alien Workshop rider of all time?
Do you think Dill should skate more and talk less?
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How do you plan on fixing this economy?
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If you come to Memphis, TN I will come out of weed-retirement for you. We could watch the Mississippi River flow with our glazed-over, low eyes and exclaim many a fist bump.
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If you come to Memphis, TN I will come out of weed-retirement for you. We could watch the Mississippi River flow with our glazed-over, low eyes and exclaim many a fist bump.
You live in Memphis, too??
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i wonder if anyone has ever called him john jakeson
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has anyone ever called you john jakeson?
Do you ever feel nostalgic for time periods you weren't around for? I grew up skating in the Tony Hawk's Pro Skater boom of 2000, and I have only ever known skateboarding as something that was fairly popular. Even prior to that in my hometown of Santa Cruz, CA, skateboarding was always popular, and as such I've never seen or experienced one of skateboarding's "deaths." Part of me wants to see it happen, but the other part feels like too many skateboarders that i love seeing random bits of footage of would completely fall off. Given the number of skateparks, the number of corporatios, etc etc, skateboarding doesn't seem like it could die right now if it wanted to, but I guess my question is if the fate of skateboarding as popular activity was in your hands, would you kill it?
that was long winded for a question thats probably already been asked.
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An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese fellow were hired at a construction site. The foreman pointed out a huge pile of sand and told the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping." To the Scotsman he said, "You're in charge of shoveling." And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies."
He then said, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile."
The foreman went away for a of couple hours, and, when he returned, the pile of sand was untouched. He asked the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?" The Italian replied, "I no hava no broom. You said to the Chinese fella that he a wasa in a charge of supplies, but he hasa disappeared and I no coulda finda him nowhere." Then the foreman turned to the Scotsman and said, "And you, I thought I told you to shovel this pile."
The Scotsman replied, "Aye, ye did lad, boot ah couldnay get meself a shoovel! Ye left th' Chinese gadgie in chairge of supplies, boot ah couldnay fin' him either." The foreman was really angry by now and stormed off toward the pile of sand to look for the Chinese guy.
Just then, the Chinese guy jumped out from behind the pile of sand and yelled...
Surpriseee
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If you had to pick one skateboarder to play with in a game of nightcrawlers, who would it be?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=night%20crawlers (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=night%20crawlers) -->definition
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Despite all the negative aspects of the over saturation of skateboard media on the internet there's still gems being produced if you weed through all the bull crap. The GX1000 series and those Map Masquerade tour videos are examples of this. What's your take on this whole thing?
More importantly, are you currently working on any video projects that will be available on DVD? It seems like you have enough steam behind you with the following you've earned with your skateboarding and now with your refreshing outlook on the industry etc. You're big enough to be a force in the industry but also one of the largest advocates for "underground" skating. Any chance you can channel that into an independent video project using your connections to different scenes etc? If so, Get Al Davis in there...
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why do you ride for alien?
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buzzcut, long hair, or corn rows?
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Has Dyrdek ever made you suck his dick?
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You get herpes from any of those girls from KOTR?
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If you could form a new team with 5 skaters, past or present, who would they be?
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Who's the most naturally gifted skater you've seen in person?
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do you want to buy some adderall?
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Are you actually a freegan? Have you ever gone dumpster diving? Have you ever gotten incredibly sick from dumpster diving? (I have)
Also- SF vs. NYC, what's your pick?
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have you ever shit in the shower?
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Besides knocking out challenges at Miraloma during KOTR, did you and the Workshop boys get into any shenanigans while in Reno? Gambling, titty bars, whore house?
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Describe your love affair with wallrides? How did you first meet? How do you plan to keep the relationship alive and well into the future?
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How many incognito accounts have you had on Slap? Frequency of posting?
-
What's your go-to trick to convince girls to swallow?
-
are you bummed that yaje is out the game?
how much weed do you smoke these days?
what are you working on right now?
-
Would you consider yourself upriver or downriver?
-
What is your setup at the moment
-
rumor has it that you were blazed when you did that sw bs wallride for your ender in mindfield is that true?
-
any tips for getting back on your board after an injury?
-
If you wanted to open a store that sold only the top of the muffins, would you bake the whole muffin and cut off the bottoms or just try to bake the top of the muffin?
Top of the muffin to you Jake!
-
Please discuss the ayahuasca experience.
-
If you wanted to open a store that sold only the top of the muffins, would you bake the whole muffin and cut off the bottoms or just try to bake the top of the muffin?
Top of the muffin to you Jake!
I worked in a restaurant that had special muffin baking pans, which were shallow, so all you got was the tops. I would imagine that's the most cost efficient method to operate such a venture.
-
omg Igor u know jack johnson?? wow can i personally come buy the bike off of you? You probably live in nyc right? omgz what ya gunna buy with that jack johnson bike money? wow you are so cool and it's like you dont even care like you're just here to get paid like who cares about skateboarding this much right? see you at da club
-
why did world war 2 happen and who is in control around here?
-
omg Igor u know jack johnson?? wow can i personally come buy the bike off of you? You probably live in nyc right? omgz what ya gunna buy with that jack johnson bike money? wow you are so cool and it's like you dont even care like you're just here to get paid like who cares about skateboarding this much right? see you at da club
i 'm not the guy with the bike that was teets.
-
favorite 90's vid? other than Plan b or blind
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If you wanted to open a store that sold only the top of the muffins, would you bake the whole muffin and cut off the bottoms or just try to bake the top of the muffin?
Top of the muffin to you Jake!
Did you know there is a cereal called Muffin Tops? It is a blueberry muffin flavored cereal, only costs a dollar and it fucking rules ass.
-
Lets say you're skating some street spot and Bobby Puleo shows up. He then tells you that only he can skate that spot. Do you listen to him or give him a "there there" pat on the back and continue on?
-
^ Jake shouldn't have to do anything. He's actually from New York
-
did you and wenning ever park your vans next to each other and have sleepovers?
-
best/worst trends in skateboarding right now?
what are your thoughts on instagram and its affects on skateboarding?
i heard certain people call you "Fake Johnson", can you explain/elaborate?
what are you currently listening to? favorite bands/artist past or present?
go to skate video/part that gets you stoked before a sesh
-
^ Jake shouldn't have to do anything. He's actually from New York
They're both out of state transplants, but Puleo should be sent back to New Jersey.
-
is ryan garshell gay for you? he gave you the banger in all the map masquerade clips. looks like hes gay for you.
-
I saw you were wearing a Palace shirt in a recent GX1000, anything going on with that??
-
why was ben stiller in your film clip for taylor?
-
I saw you were wearing a Palace shirt in a recent GX1000, anything going on with that??
Polar you mean?
-
why didnt the shop turn you pro after minefield?
-
We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
32 days and counting.
-
Hey, what is the latest you've ever stayed up?
Follow up question: how tired were you the next day?
-
Do you miss Alex "Trainwreck" Gall?
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We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
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When does your life splicing come out
-
are you a fat cunt
-
Can I have some money?
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We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
-
Why didn't you change your name to something better?
-
what did u think of when, in OIAM, mikey should up josh with the 5-0 on the hubba
-
do you think being gay is a choice?
-
what is it like skating with gilbert on alien tours? what's the craziest thing you've seen grant taylor do, on or off board?
how was it skating with jimmy lannon and al davis and yonnie and all them last year on that cross country tour, i'm pretty jelly
also are you planning another trip like the MapMasquerade with that crew, that was a dream team assembled right there
-
does your mom give you a valentines day card?
-
if you could of been on any team from the past, what team, year and why?
-
What's it like being on the show New Girl with Zooey Deschanel? Is she a good kisser?
-
What pro has the hottest/raddest girl? Answer together or separate and tell us why. If you don't have a good answer click through the "Pro Skaters WW" thread.
-
can you teach us how to wallride
-
How does slack lining improve your skating? Is that the secret to wall rides?
-
can we be bros? likeeee fahreal bros lets get emotionll man how u been?
-
How does NYC skating change the way you approach more conventional style skatespots?
-
Break down your kissing technique as displayed in KOTR.
-
what is one trick you absolutely cannot do?
-
what do you think of J-Lays wiener?
-
how high can you wallie?
-
can u dunk a basketball?
who is the weirdest dude on AWS?
-
Matt Damon or Ben Affleck?
-
Would you rather have to name your first born son Nintendo or have no tastebuds?
-
Do you feel some type of way?
-
who stole the soul?
-
What's the most memorable experience you've had during a psychedelic experience? Any important lessons learned perhaps?
-
Do you know what your Myers-Briggs Type is?
-
do you believe in god?
(general views on religion )
-
do you believe in god?
(general views on religion )
I just wanted to say that I love your user name and I would never throw you away. Never.
-
How did the recent incarceration go?
-
Did you get "locked up" to further postpone your answering these questions?
Can you just answer them from jail via your one phone call?
-
Still waiting....
Jeopardy Theme Song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWuQVpBeqLs#ws)
-
(http://distilleryimage4.s3.amazonaws.com/89b0e662ff0c11e2b10722000a1f98d4_7.jpg)
What you did?
-
My son, how did you get arrested?
-
are you currently still living out of a van? (or was that whole thing in that tws a lie?)
-
Stuffed crust or pan style?
-
(http://distilleryimage4.s3.amazonaws.com/89b0e662ff0c11e2b10722000a1f98d4_7.jpg)
What you did?
did you pick up the soap?
-
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(http://distilleryimage4.s3.amazonaws.com/89b0e662ff0c11e2b10722000a1f98d4_7.jpg)
What you did?
What would you do for a pack of cigs?
-
When you gonna get up in Erica Yary's lil griller?
-
a / s / l ?
-
what's it like in space?
-
Whats up with Austin Kanfoush these days?
-
Is it true your leaving aws for a company called scum co
-
Dear Mr. Johnston,
Are you related to Mark Johnston?
Thanxx
-
why arent i sponsored yet?
-
do girls really care about dick size?
-
What's the most memorable experience you've had during a psychedelic experience? Any important lessons learned perhaps?
cmon, those kind of experiences relate to you individually, man. anyone who's tripped hard, knows that.
-
Which scene of Good Will Hunting were you jackin' it to?
"It's Not Your Fault" always gets me there.
-
i like the one about robin williams wife farting in her sleep
-
If you could kill one famous person and get away with it, would it be Ben Affleck so he could never play Batman?
-
you know when people deliberately let their phone ring a few times before answering to seem like they've got other shit going on? are you doing the same thing with these questions?
-
Favorite thing to skate at HCS
Who's the cutest member of the Outlaw Collective?
-
what's your favorite board size bigboi
-
Whats does it feel like to know you have good genetic material?
-
Do you yearn?
-
do girls really care about dick size?
-
do abbreviations count in scrabble?
-
So are we doing this thing or not ?
-
will this ever happen?
-
Yo.
-
Sup.
-
do you draw more inspiration from pros or peers?
sickest homies that dont get much shine?
-
Thoughts on NEW BALANCE.
Also, What were you doing ten years ago today.
-
do people make fun of your johnson?
-
Is it true that those make-outs on KOTR were your first ever?
-
do you still read your bible after you land tricks?
-
if you could take any animal from a zoo what would you take?
-
Have you pursued friendly relations with other Jake Johnsons? If so, are you on a personal basis with any of them? I'm sure you're aware of a few. I know one in New Mexico. And then there's the professional surfer. And then the guy from Zooey Deschanel's new show on Fox.
Do you feel that being bestowed with the name "Jake" had any influence on the direction of your life? How do you think your life would be today if you were born as Chaz Bronson? Or Toby Greenstorm?
-
would you rather be given a hoverboard, or a lifetime supply of your favorite food?
ALso, DO you think penis size equates to one's fighting/talent in life? (I ask a lot of people this, because it really does sem like the dudes with the big ones are good at everything and small dick dudes just talk shit, and cant harness the power they will never be gifted with?
-
would you rather be given a hoverboard, or a lifetime supply of your favorite food?
ALso, DO you think penis size equates to one's fighting/talent in life? (I ask a lot of people this, because it really does sem like the dudes with the big ones are good at everything and small dick dudes just talk shit, and cant harness the power they will never be gifted with?
not true, i have a big dick, but i suck at everything.
-
Guess we are never gunna see this, huh?
-
Guess we are never gunna see this, huh?
What do you expect from other skateboarding pot smokers... give it till spring 2014 it'll happen.
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Guess we are never gunna see this, huh?
What do you expect from other skateboarding pot smokers... give it till spring 2014 it'll happen.
I hear ya. These used to at least have a 8 week turn around.
-
Who's the most naturally gifted skater you've seen in person?
there is a tally somewhere in transworld or somthin where they ask pros and am's who the most "gifted" is out there.
nearly all of them said luan, chris cole, shane oneill, prod.
i think jake's right there with the top notch/ seriously technically gifted dudes who are evolving the shit outa this sport trick and style wise
-
When I first heard of you it was a sequence of you doing a ss flip back tail on a handrail in skateboarder, at that time I remember there were a bunch of dudes with J.J. names like John Jakeson, Jimmy Johnson, Jake Johnson, John Johnson, and Jake Jakerson. Why do you think you pulled above the rest and are the only one I can think of anymore, and are the only one to get me FUCKING STOKED?
btw your mindfield part and tws aws section were fuckin' bonkers, congrats! When will we see new footage?
-
How many shoe companies have offered you a deal since Gravis ?
-
How many shoe companies have offered you a deal since Gravis ?
-
why did you recently get arrested?
Did Dime ruin your life?
would you compete in street league if the offer came up?
-
FUCK YOU JAKE JOHNSON I HATE YOU
-
why sean, why?
-
How long do you plan on being a professional skateboarder for?
Will u eventually find a "real job"?
-
Expand Quote
How many shoe companies have offered you a deal since Gravis ?
-
How was skating for Chapman.
-
You seem to back the local skate scene pretty hard (respect), what would it take you to get on one of those big corporation companies like nike or Adidas
-
I saw in your brick harbor video that you skated a lot of Upstate, Ny spots. Syracuse more particularly. Im from syracuse and I'm wondering your impressions of the skate scene we have, and why do you think Upstate NY is often slept on? Would you consider coming back again?
-
fuck this dude off and get someone reliable in here
-
What did you think happened after Seinfeld's finale and how did it affect your life?
-
Seen you wearing a Polar shirt in a vid. What's your opinion on the rise of independent skateboard companies? Would you be stoked to ride for polar?
-
you are double jointed right? has it given you any trouble with your ankles? because im double jointed and i keep getting ankle sprains. any solution you recommend?
-
Stop playing, is this really gonna happen?
-
as someone who grew up in Boalsburg (because you actually know what town that is) do you have love for any of the "shitty" happy valley spots; "barcelona", either of the ditches, prospect ledge's, or Nicolas towers?
Or any of the many other spots that I only have really weird names for bceause of my S.C.A.H. generation came up with... also havent see johnny b in a while. Have you.I hope him and his family are great!!!
-
do you listen to Ween?
-
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6620545024/h975A33A0/)
-
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6620545024/h975A33A0/)
:'(
-
who are you?
-
Why did you do that wallride? Are you a dangerman?
-
but was it a wallride? a waveride? or a banktravel?
-
Do you ever get confused for Jake Donnelly and vice versa?
-
Yo bitch fag, get me over to new york in your suitcase im banned from U.S till im over 18 for cracking a security guard 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
-
hello jake its your mother, come home for tea now otherwise its gunna get cold!
love from mrs johnson
-
what is your shoe sponsor? is it lakai?
-
how often do you masturbate? does it improve your skating/daily life?
-
When is a wall not a wall?
-
How do you feel about being a fan favorite on slap?
did/do you have any good nicknames (last name being Johnson and all)
What shoes are you wearing?
-
Favorite city?
And favorite plaza-like spot.
-
duffels jock or brockmans tooth?
-
Are you still going to get your helicopter license?
-
Is this happening?
-
Gonz video days or Natas wheels of fire
-
I will send one of you mods a postcard if you close this thread. Could be a story, a doodle, a joke, maybe just a simple greeting. But you'll have a reason to check your mailbox.
-
I demand my fucking Jake Johnson questions
-
I demand my fucking Jake Johnson questions
-
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I demand my fucking Jake Johnson questions
-
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I demand my fucking Jake Johnson questions
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I demand my fucking Jake Johnson questions
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I demand my fucking Jake Johnson questions
-
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I demand my fucking Jake Johnson questions
-
En Vogue - Never Gonna Get It (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgDORvds824#)
-
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I demand my fucking Jake Johnson questions
-
When are you gonna come and skate Oahu. You should move over here
-
its released along with the next forum feeder.
-
its released along with the next forum feeder.
and a direct download to the plan b video
-
Have you ever taken any interest in the anarchist history of Pittsburgh?
-
What is like being asked so many dumb questions? Out of the 100 questions asked, why do you answer like five of them?
-
I ain't that mad tho I just don't like being lied to
(http://static.gigwise.com/gallery/8121826_stan620.jpg)
-
have you made out with a woman since KOTR?
-
You seem like a guy who knows their shit. So my question is where do you stand politically? Do you think that skateboarding influenced your political position and how if yes?
-
What was your real motivation for teasing us silly, acting like you were going to answer a bunch of our questions? Or is it the "people" that "work" at SLAP's fault?
-
I think Jake is dead. RIP
-
So what's up with the Pals questions?
-
have you ever stuck batteries up your bum?
-
favorite rapper?
-
If you could make a sex tape with any man,woman or animal. Who or what would it be?
-
(http://i940.photobucket.com/albums/ad246/pulledit27/photo2-5.jpg)
WHY ARE YOU BLACK NOW?
-
We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
-
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We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
-
jake, are you into any sociology, or social science in general?
-
Y
-
:P?
-
We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
(http://www.slapmagazine.com/media/k2/items/cache/f84800a57d3e3a5f2516c71fdc657da9_L.jpg)
-
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mch477jUsg1qh5sfuo1_500.jpg)
(http://quartersnacks.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/jake_jonhson_tompkins_sq_park_emilio_cuilan_2011.jpg)
(http://www.rippedlaces.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/BarefootJake.jpg)
(http://quartersnacks.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/jake-johnson-wallride.jpg)
(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqq9xrKzLb1qzi6rko1_500.jpg)
(http://liveskateboardmedia.com/sites/liveskateboardmedia.com/files/field/image/JakeJohnson_Strobeck.jpg)
-
doesnt anyone on the forum know him or have his numbr? just ask him to do the damn thing i dun think slap is gonna come thru this time
-
doesnt anyone on the forum know him or have his numbr? just ask him to do the damn thing i dun think slap is gonna come thru this time
Is Slap even something anymore? aside from the forum?
-
if you had to be racist who would you hate?
if you had to be gay who would you fuck?
whats your stance on yolo?
do you ever have shitty high school dropout dick riders for tm's?
-
It's over
-
Waynes brothers or Martin?
YOu ever butter a pop tart?
What you think about Sean WHite
WHat your favorite Gucci MAne song?
When yout tink the PLan B video comin out>
What do you think of our countries current economic state opposed to say when George W. Bush was in office?
Ass or tittiez?
-
It's over
(http://rapradar.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/drake-far-from-over.jpg)
-
hardest trick in mindfield?
-
On a scale of 1-12.5 how smooth do you think Mike Carroll's balls are?
If they're as smooth as his skating then...
you know...
it'd be really smooth...
jake johnson if you've secretly died then just tell us. We need to know this
-
Expand Quote
doesnt anyone on the forum know him or have his numbr? just ask him to do the damn thing i dun think slap is gonna come thru this time
Is Slap even something anymore? aside from the forum?
i talked to him on the phone after I found one of the map masquerade packages
-
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doesnt anyone on the forum know him or have his numbr? just ask him to do the damn thing i dun think slap is gonna come thru this time
Is Slap even something anymore? aside from the forum?
i talked to him on the phone after I found one of the map masquerade packages
-
Do you like to ski?
-
hey remember that one time when you guys said you were going to have a jake johnson pals questions?
-
do you like your mom or your dad more?
ever smoke crack?
how many girls have you bagged?
favorite planet and why?
least favorite body part?
-
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We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
-
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We promise a quick turnaround time on this one.
-
Jake, do you think they will ever actually do this?
-
Jake, would you ever consider changing your name to John Jakeson to be more marketable? I feel like Jake Johnson sounds too foreign and I am very xenophobic.
-
Jake, who would you rather rail lines of blow with, Nyjah or Jason Jessee back in the day?
-
Can we get some clarification if this shit is happening or not? If not, take the post down. I don't even think Erica's was up this long. Stop feeding me lies!
-
Seriously.
-
I havent been on slap in months and im not even slightly surprised this thread is still up
-
I havent been on slap in months and im not even slightly surprised this thread is still up
If they're not doing it someone should delete the topic so we can forget about it already. Harsh...
-
(http://www.jenkemmag.com/home/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/Jenkem_Static4_Premiere_15.jpg)
Plenty of time to go to the STATIC premiere....
-
Jake will write a book dedicated to answering Slap questions. I would buy it.
-
supposedly it's coming out on the one year anniversary of them announcing it was coming soon.
-
supposedly it's coming out on the one year anniversary of them announcing it was coming soon.
wasn't that two years ago now?
-
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supposedly it's coming out on the one year anniversary of them announcing it was coming soon.
wasn't that two years ago now?
I could be wrong but the first page of this thread was June 2013
-
ay yo jake, if you need like gas money for your van or a cell phone bill paid so you can do this interview ill like buy you groceries with my EBT or something.
-
^ I'll throw in too.
What are your favorite nacho toppings?
-
How do you feel about me?
-
If you had a girl with nice butt, how much of the times would you do her from behind?
I would about 90%.
-
ohh, so you got time for thrasher radio but no love for your boys over here on slap....
-
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
-
I'm voting we should just merge this with the where are they now thread and stop the cock teasing, what do you think Jake?
-
Hey jake, i have question,,, do you like stuff?
-
What are we going to get this thread for its first birthday? Maybe a fire truck or a playskool piano?
-
Someone should make a "Slap pals answer 'Jake Johnson Pals Questions'" thread, where you have to go through the questions and just answer random questions personally.
-
Hi Jake.
What the fuck is your middle name?
Thanks.
-
Someone should make a "Slap pals answer 'Jake Johnson Pals Questions'" thread, where you have to go through the questions and just answer random questions personally.
You do it, I would, but I'm not stealing your idea.
-
Anyway, new Jake photo in the last A Brief Glance, issue 25.
http://www.abriefglance.com/abg-news/welcome-to-a-brief-glance-skateboardmag-issue_25.html (http://www.abriefglance.com/abg-news/welcome-to-a-brief-glance-skateboardmag-issue_25.html)
(http://i62.tinypic.com/2572iag.jpg)
-
From yesterday.
(http://photos-f.ak.instagram.com/hphotos-ak-xap1/10499109_512792272155053_858712063_n.jpg)
-
That picture makes me very happy.
-
Where's that picture from? Is that in Malmo?
-
We should gon on lockout until this shit happens.
-
Where's that picture from? Is that in Malmo?
Yeah, over at TBS.
-
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Where's that picture from? Is that in Malmo?
I can see Jake and Pontus b2b wallrides going mach 10
-
JJ or Big Johnson?
-
JJ or Big Johnson?
Bj
-
does obamacare cover dental????
-
after a poop. do you sit or stand to wipe?
-
(http://puu.sh/b0ivk/baf8e5f2c1.png)
8) 8) 8)
-
DEAR JAKE
What is your secret to wall rides?
-
Yo! Come skate hawaii!
-
How does it feel to not answer any of these SUPER serious inquiries about yourself?
-
hey what's goodie
which type of blunt rap is it that you prefer?
-
i just wanted to post in here sorry
-
are u lit right now? what loud u been smoking?
-
Do you still enjoy skateboarding?
Will you continue a Pro-carrer after paying your dept? Continue skateboarding at all or are you over it?
-
how much punani do you haul on the road?
-
have you ever smelt your own dick after fucking a chick?
-
How many double cheeseburgers did you eat in london overall?
why did you decide not to keep the wall ride with the nosegrab instead of the regular wall ride in static?
-
When will this Pals Questions finally come out?
-
would you rather be forced to have sebo walkers griptape on every single board you skate or own for the rest of your life or have a small man from new york follow you around telling you your a worthless no body? (watch the video link to understand)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9E62iA6KCIQ (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9E62iA6KCIQ)
-
TAKE THIS FUCKING THREAD DOWN
-
going through these pages was painful
-
will pushing mongo ever make a come back?
-
Got any new years resolutions?
-
Do you think my girlfriend is cheating on me???? If she is, what race is the dude/ dudes she's cheating with? Hispanic, anglo, black, Samoan etc...???
Thanks Jake johnson.
-
What do you think gets more talked about... Raney Barnes bald spot or Sammy Baca dressing like an gang member?
-
you said in your cafe creme interview that you had a "mental and physical disconnect from reality during September of 2009. ". would you be willing to elaborate on that ?
-
Talk about the GX100 video?
-
Brian Downey said you had some really innovative and unique ideas for AWS that went ignored. Can you elaborate?
-
How would you approach skateboarding coming back from an ankle/lower body surgery? Any tips or advice?
-
Where do you get off?
-
Just who do you think you are?
What gives you the right?
You just don't get it do you?
-
Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
Can you really be far even as decided half as much to use go wish for that?
-
We've all seen you in the movies and tabloids, but who is the real Jake Johnson?
Why does YouTube think I want to go to Olive Garden?
And what is this all about:
Talking cat! Oh Long Johnson... :) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usSrJGX1Wxs#)
-
Do you meditate? If so, how often, and for how long?
-
Did you turn down the Gonz?
Are you always this fashionably late?
-
but was it a wallride? a waveride? or a banktravel?
Or bs carve? Can you please settle this once and for all?
-
As you're so tight with the Polar guys. What do you think to so many kids jumping on the wallie/no comply/Chuck Taylor bandwagon as a just fashion statement rather than actually paying attention to what 'inspire others to inspire themselves' means?
-
We met at South Bank this last summer and torched a fatty, how do I get my JJ debut pro board for the wall signed?
-
Please answer these four questions with regard to the skateboard as a technological medium, i.e., an extension of the human body.
What does the medium enhance?
What does the medium make obsolete?
What does the medium retrieve that had been obsolesced earlier?
What does the medium flip into when pushed to extremes?
Example answers unrelated to skateboards can be found here, it's more straight-forward than it might seem: http://www.horton.ednet.ns.ca/staff/scottbennett/media/examples.html (http://www.horton.ednet.ns.ca/staff/scottbennett/media/examples.html)
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whats up with you and dimemtl