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General Discussion => WHATEVER => Topic started by: rawbertson. on September 20, 2010, 12:44:13 PM
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went out with that girl on saturday, spent a ton on dinner and shit, we went back to my house, i finger blasted her, then she said "i dont think i wanna do anything else i just wanna take it slow" then i drove her home. wtf!?
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Lol, Macklin would've had her begging to teabag her while he was just watching tv in a sweatsuit.
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(http://authenticsteroids.com/imgp/Rohypnol-1mg30tabs.jpg)
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went out with that girl on saturday, spent a ton on dinner and shit, we went back to my house, i finger blasted her, then she said "i dont think i wanna do anything else i just wanna take it slow" then i drove her home. wtf!?
Download a movie or two, go buy this
(http://blogs.citypages.com/ctg/md%202020%202jpg.jpg)
And what type of girl is she? I downloaded saw when it first dropped, 2 MD 2020's (they come in mad flavors so you cant go wrong) I was dating this preppy american eagle stuck up bitch, She never would let me fuck her in the ass, but after not even one of these md's she just let me slide it inside.
a good friend once told me "all women are hoes, you just gotta bring it out of them"
to a lesser extent.
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it sucks cause i am blowing it in every aspect 24 / 7 and i really cant even complain, i am not one of those concentration camp kids or some heroin addicted preggo teen custy
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it sucks cause i am blowing it in every aspect 24 / 7 and i really cant even complain, i am not one of those concentration camp kids or some heroin addicted preggo teen custy
If you try to catch butterflies, they'll never come to you"
loneliness and fatigue breed fear- it is better not to trouble yourself with your own imaginings
You've known how to mac since day one. own that bitch and if it does not work, there's a million more just like her.
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Put in work for those titties rawb. Don't take one decline and roll over dead. Show this girl why she needs to blow you and you'll feel better.
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I know how you feel man, chicks are a confusing bunch.
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All women have this weird complex where they don't want to feel like a slut.
Next time she pulls that shit on you just say 'okay', lay back and turn the telly back on.
If she doesn't try to turn the heat back on you can just masturbate later to the smell of your fingers.
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ask her if titty fucking is within the confines of "taking it slow." if it is not, ask for the dinner money back or titty rape her.
EDIT: if her tits are non existent or small, disregard my advice. continue being a bitch and frustrated.
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it's funny, i find that when a girl really likes me, she is less willing to give it up on the first date cause she doesn't want me to have "that" image of her. whereas ive had experiences with really hot chicks, who could easily get a boyfriend if they wanted, that are down on the first night cause they don't care what you think about them, cause they don't really care about you. keep in mind there are a ton of factors that have nothing to with you, which play into women's decision making. if you were just looking for a one night thing with this chick that is kind of a bummer, but it's not worth blaming yourself over.
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fucking smother her ass.?
(http://d3hqdt8j93rgvn.cloudfront.net/Image/MEDIUM_8a78c6e02140d931012142ff356f66a1.jpg)
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Ask her to pay next time because you're uncomfortable paying for her affection. It's the modern version of this:
The Door Test (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mLqshL0WEk#ws)
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Jermaine stewart we don't have to take our clothes off. Top (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ID_N7rv-iN8#)
I know my morals on sex is not what most guys follow...but don't' worry she's not gonna fuck on the first date. Enjoy your time with her, if you can't don't waste your time. Sex isn't everything.
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selfish bitch. You worked that pussy and she didn't give you no love back? fuck that shit. If she was concerned about moving slow she wouldn't have let you stick your fingers in her pussy, that's just some lazy shit right there.
Either that or you made her feel like you were an alien prodding her and its over anyway.
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Girl advice on slap is the greatest.
Just rape her. If you wear a mask you'll be good. It's probably a fantasy of hers anyway.
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If you're the type of dude who cries about his female problems on an internet forum, you're probably not getting any. Ever.
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dont listen to em rawb you got this
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rawb, can you bump the last thread you made liike this... they're funny as shit
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Ask her to pay next time because you're uncomfortable paying for her affection. It's the modern version of this:
The Door Test (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mLqshL0WEk#ws)
thats a killer movie
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As hard as it is, let it go. Not worth it to stress a chick but I do see where you're coming from.
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The secrete is making her think you could take it or leave it.
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You should've jammed your fingerbangers into her nose then accepted a rain check.
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I really don't see what the problem is here.
You took a girl out for dinner then you got to finger bang her pussy. Sounds like a good night to me.
And now there is future options for cock banging her pussy.
So unless your only problem is that she didn't fuck you on your first date, then really there is no problem here.
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my two cents is that you got the finger bang for free pretty much.....she really didn't want to do anything, but that seemed like the most minimal thing next to feeling her tits...which you better have done.....
anyone know if women actually enjoy it?
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its a trap dont bite, she wants you to be her bf, or she wants to cock tease you for as long as she can, to make her self feel better Is this the girl you posted pics of a few weeks back, she was amazing
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seems like a lot of them aren't crazy about it
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Lol, Macklin would've had her begging to teabag her while he was just watching tv in a sweatsuit.
And thats after a 5 for 5 at Arby's and her sitting around watching me do wallies at the skatepark for 2 hours...
But really, Rawb... Should have used that fingerbang as a gateway to pussy feasting.
The world is yours if you get your pussy eating game on lock.
I suggest you also tounge her butthole briefly to make a more substantial impact.
And if the time finally comes when she lets you put it in her, you can get her off orally and then it doesnt matter if you fuck well or not. No pressure. Just get to the finish line at your own pace and get the victory nut.
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Ok ... I said I was bummed about not getting the hj. She said she would buy me dinner nexty time. She also said she doesn't have time for a bf but wants to keep hanging out with me, buy doesn't know whayt she wants in a relationship. I think I am going to keep trying for a month and if still nothing then let it go. And its the chick from the other thread
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Ok ... I said I was bummed about not getting the hj. She said she would buy me dinner nexty time. She also said she doesn't have time for a bf but wants to keep hanging out with me, buy doesn't know whayt she wants in a relationship. I think I am going to keep trying for a month and if still nothing then let it go. And its the chick from the other thread
you should try, but not too hard. it really sounds like she's not diggin it. you said you were gonna ask here to be your gf after 2 dates, you tried going in for the kill after dating her for such a short time and now she's giving you the "i don't have time/i don't know what i want" routine. you shoulda done what Macklin said and gone for a tongue lashing if you were already down in her cavern. ease up on her, man. if she wants your throbbin lil rawb, she'll come askin for it. simple as that.
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Did you use the pinch or the swirl?
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my two cents is that you got the finger bang for free pretty much.....she really didn't want to do anything, but that seemed like the most minimal thing next to feeling her tits...which you better have done.....
anyone know if women actually enjoy it?
It depends on the girl.
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Yes its always hard for me to commit moving my mouth to her pussy. i herd that sucking the clitoris is the key is that true ? !
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kill her then rape her.
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do u think if i write a killer rap for her i can turn this whole thing around?
i think i figured out what i need to do:
1. stop textin her
2. next few hang outs should be not at my place so i am not tryin to mack her, then she will see i am just bein a cool friend not only tryin to bang
3. dont spend another penny
4. get drunk before next time tryin to mack her
i really do like hanging out with her thuogh, but i couldnt really say how she is like that much better than any other girl i have ever been out with other than she actually likes a lot of the same shit i do as far as music and she even likes skate videos. i macked her after watching baker deathwish tour... i dont know any girls so that is probably why i am so desperate she can probably sense it from a mile away. i gotta chill out and hope i havent ruined it too much.
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She's not feelin' it. Move on, don't waste a month getting pissed.
This.
Tell her you'll be glad to be a FB friend or something, but you're more interested in a girl without any hangups. Tell her straight up you're too old to be playing games, and if you're not hooked up later down the road she can feel free to ring you up.
I tell you this in hopes that it will get you laid, by her. If not, you've at least cut the rope so you can focus on getting hooked up with a chick who is a bit more down... she sounds flakey man.
Edit: just saw your post... give the impression that she's wasting your time, but be nice and friendly about it. If she senses that you're pretty much over it, I think you'll get better odds.
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She's not feelin' it. Move on, don't waste a month getting pissed.
This.
Tell her you'll be glad to be a FB friend or something, but you're more interested in a girl without any hangups. Tell her straight up you're too old to be playing games, and if you're not hooked up later down the road she can feel free to ring you up.
I tell you this in hopes that it will get you laid, by her. If not, you've at least cut the rope so you can focus on getting hooked up with a chick who is a bit more down... she sounds flakey man.
Edit: just saw your post... give the impression that she's wasting your time, but be nice and friendly about it. If she senses that you're pretty much over it, I think you'll get better odds.
that is pretty much what my best friend told me to do. its true though l am too old to be playin games. i did tell her on sunday that i didnt think this was gonna work too well cause i was lookin for something a little more serious and mature in a relationship than this waiting around shit. she replied that she just wasnt sure what she wanted. so yeah thats kind of gay i mean i wish shed at least tell me what the fuck shes thinkin
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She's not feelin' it. Move on, don't waste a month getting pissed.
This.
Tell her you'll be glad to be a FB friend or something, but you're more interested in a girl without any hangups. Tell her straight up you're too old to be playing games, and if you're not hooked up later down the road she can feel free to ring you up.
I tell you this in hopes that it will get you laid, by her. If not, you've at least cut the rope so you can focus on getting hooked up with a chick who is a bit more down... she sounds flakey man.
Edit: just saw your post... give the impression that she's wasting your time, but be nice and friendly about it. If she senses that you're pretty much over it, I think you'll get better odds.
that is pretty much what my best friend told me to do. its true though l am too old to be playin games. i did tell her on sunday that i didnt think this was gonna work too well cause i was lookin for something a little more serious and mature in a relationship than this waiting around shit. she replied that she just wasnt sure what she wanted. so yeah thats kind of gay i mean i wish shed at least tell me what the fuck shes thinkin
I think you should leave it, if she doesnt tell you anything and pretend that something might happen it wont, so just leave her, there are others out there for you rawb.
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"that is pretty much what my best friend told me to do. its true though l am too old to be playin games. i did tell her on sunday that i didnt think this was gonna work too well cause i was lookin for something a little more serious and mature in a relationship than this waiting around shit. she replied that she just wasnt sure what she wanted. so yeah thats kind of gay i mean i wish shed at least tell me what the fuck shes thinkin"
1) You're first mistake was taking her out to dinner, but you probably know that already. Dinner dates play out more like boring job interviews, try something more casual next time and spend as little money as possible. You can't buy your way into a womans vagina, it doesn't work like that. Vagina tingles are generated by the dominance and aloofness of masculinity not money. You said she would buy you dinner next time? Make her cook for you instead. if she likes you, she will put in the effort.
2)Drop the "i want a long term relationship" stuff, she is not worthy of that yet and you have to make sure she knows that, make her qualify herself, be the selector. If youre after a long term relationship, you have to make sure she is a good women and be unwavering with your standards. Otherwise you come off like a low value loser who is lucky to have anyone and this is bad. Be advised you will be tested. She will make you jump through hoops and pull shit on you to see if your manhood is up to snuff. Never jump through a woman's hoops and never hesitate to call her on her bullshit, also learn the word "no".
3) For next time, deny HER sex, don't even kiss her, make sure she is worthy of your seed first. Be in the psychological state that she is the one who would be lucky to fuck you.. She won't be expecting to be denied intimacy and this will allow you to re-frame and gain "hand". Also, make yourself unavailable sporadically, don't contact her so much, it will get the hamster wheel in her hind brain spinning.
4) You are going to have to be dominant, aloof, in control and internally validated. Understand that she has to submit to you if you want her to stick around. If she does, no more skate videos, she shouldn't even know you skate, keep that world separate. And don't let her in your head so easily, be a lil more guarded.
Some of the basics:
http://roissy.wordpress.com/the-sixteen-commandments-of-poon/ (http://roissy.wordpress.com/the-sixteen-commandments-of-poon/)
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i joked around earlier about the titty raping and what not but in all seriousness, listen to someone that actually knows you (aka your friend) over any of these dudes here. they know your though patterns in real life better than we do. good luck. and if youre in the friend zone, GET THE FUCK OUT RIGHT NOW. it is absolutely impossible to become friends with a woman you were into. none of your other relationships will ever work if you befriend her.
but then again, listen to your real friend.
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Rawb,
never give a girl the upper hand, or you will be begging for sex forever. Treat her with respect, but don't let the bitch step all over you. YOuare too old to be playin' games with some insecure girl, I'd move on. I had a bitch play some shit to me a few weeks back, some prime ass pussy came to my house, got in my bed, naked, and woudlnt fuck me, well I never called that bitch agian, and I never answer her txts, bitch is into games, and men don't play games, unless they are for ps3 or xbox.
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do u think if i write a killer rap for her i can turn this whole thing around?
i think i figured out what i need to do:
1. stop textin her
2. next few hang outs should be not at my place so i am not tryin to mack her, then she will see i am just bein a cool friend not only tryin to bang
3. dont spend another penny
4. get drunk before next time tryin to mack her
i really do like hanging out with her thuogh, but i couldnt really say how she is like that much better than any other girl i have ever been out with other than she actually likes a lot of the same shit i do as far as music and she even likes skate videos. i macked her after watching baker deathwish tour... i dont know any girls so that is probably why i am so desperate she can probably sense it from a mile away. i gotta chill out and hope i havent ruined it too much.
Yes. Do this. Stop talking to her, and in a month or two, show up at her door wasted late at night and when she answers, just start rapping at her.
That's how Jay-z landed beyonce.
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do u think if i write a killer rap for her i can turn this whole thing around?
i think i figured out what i need to do:
1. stop textin her
2. next few hang outs should be not at my place so i am not tryin to mack her, then she will see i am just bein a cool friend not only tryin to bang
3. dont spend another penny
4. get drunk before next time tryin to mack her
i really do like hanging out with her thuogh, but i couldnt really say how she is like that much better than any other girl i have ever been out with other than she actually likes a lot of the same shit i do as far as music and she even likes skate videos. i macked her after watching baker deathwish tour... i dont know any girls so that is probably why i am so desperate she can probably sense it from a mile away. i gotta chill out and hope i havent ruined it too much.
rapping at her.
That's how Jay-z landed beyonce.
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Get her comfortable around you, but not to the point where you end up in the friend zone. Once you're in the friend zone, it's a wrap.
Weed makes women horny under the right circumstances too, use that to your advantage if you must.
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do u think if i write a killer rap for her i can turn this whole thing around?
i think i figured out what i need to do:
1. stop textin her
2. next few hang outs should be not at my place so i am not tryin to mack her, then she will see i am just bein a cool friend not only tryin to bang
3. dont spend another penny
4. get drunk before next time tryin to mack her
i really do like hanging out with her thuogh, but i couldnt really say how she is like that much better than any other girl i have ever been out with other than she actually likes a lot of the same shit i do as far as music and she even likes skate videos. i macked her after watching baker deathwish tour... i dont know any girls so that is probably why i am so desperate she can probably sense it from a mile away. i gotta chill out and hope i havent ruined it too much.
That's how Jay-z landed beyonce.
do this and this only. learn form Jiggaman and spit the hardest love rap ever. her panties will be creamin' once you're done with your romantic flow.
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Rawb,
bitch is into games, and men don't play games, unless they are for ps3 or xbox.
Brilliant.
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well I never called that bitch agian, and I never answer her txts
good call
i got a titty fuck last night for 100$ thats less than i spent on all those damn dates
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The Price is Right losing horn (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A#)
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well I never called that bitch agian, and I never answer her txts
good call
i got a titty fuck last night for 100$ thats less than i spent on all those damn dates
what the hell? you paid 100 bucks for a tit fuck? c'mon rawb. you gotta step your game up. this bums me out that you gotta pay for sex, and it wasn't even vaginal. shit, it wasn't even anal. geez.
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Well, if you're going to buy sex... unless her tits have bleeding ulcers, seems like that's probably the safest way of going about it.
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he probably is lying.
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he probably is lying.
Wow, that would be harsh. What type of person would lie about paying to titty fuck a hooker? He also overpaid. According to the book superfreakonomics, the average price to ass fuck a chicago hooker is about $96. Of course, the average woman in this sample set will also give a $6 discount for crack.
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Oh and this is the truth.
But really, Rawb... Should have used that fingerbang as a gateway to pussy feasting.
The world is yours if you get your pussy eating game on lock.
I suggest you also tounge her butthole briefly to make a more substantial impact.
And if the time finally comes when she lets you put it in her, you can get her off orally and then it doesnt matter if you fuck well or not. No pressure. Just get to the finish line at your own pace and get the victory nut.
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Make sure to get her drunk and give her cocaine or MDMA if possible
Pull your cock out and wiggle it to this song
The Orange Alabaster Mushroom- Tree Pie (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPlpsuEGj90#)
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Maybe you need to improve your "finger blasting" technique.
Maybe she would have some advice for you in that department with regards the type of "blasting" she may or may not enjoy.
Open convo is the way to go.
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i fingerbanged her amazing there is no denying that, her pussy walls looked like the edges at pier 7 when i was done, i fucken broke her ovaries. she is just a greedy bitch suckin my resources but not my cock.
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I'd rather jack off with tiger balm as lube than pay for sex
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i fingerbanged her amazing there is no denying that, her pussy walls looked like the edges at pier 7 when i was done, i fucken broke her ovaries. she is just a greedy bitch suckin my resources but not my cock.
Dude, softly, gently, its an organ massage, not a whack-a-mole.
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i fingerbanged her amazing there is no denying that, her pussy walls looked like the edges at pier 7 when i was done, i fucken broke her ovaries. she is just a greedy bitch suckin my resources but not my cock.
HAHAHAHA i just woke up my wife and kid
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(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs151.snc3/17859_294940983978_508078978_3316393_1824044_n.jpg)
get in that ass rawb
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^in that situation i would ask to see the camera, walk over to the door and brb...
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i am back on fucking dating websites now
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i am back on fucking dating websites now
you cannot possibly fuck a website. i tried and failed. miserably.
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Wow, that would be harsh. What type of person would lie about paying to titty fuck a hooker? He also overpaid. According to the book superfreakonomics, the average price to ass fuck a chicago hooker is about $96. Of course, the average woman in this sample set will also give a $6 discount for crack.
is this part deux of freakonomics which was totally awesome? I need it yo
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i fingerbanged her amazing there is no denying that, her pussy walls looked like the edges at pier 7 when i was done, i fucken broke her ovaries. she is just a greedy bitch suckin my resources but not my cock.
You should have a porn tab open so you can switch in a pinch. It'd be much more embarrassing to get caught on SLAP.
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i am back on fucking dating websites now
Unacceptable. Let's hear the titty fuck story instead now.
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went to the rub and tug near my work, in canada as long as there is no penetration it is legal to get handjobs/titty fucks/armpit/fjs
the girl was black and she had a british accent and bad teeth. she claimed to be studying biology or some shit @ the University of Western Ontario, and she was doing this just for the money. i found that hard to believe, but she did a good job regardless. wouldnt go back tho.
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does she wear gloves?
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no, they usually only wear gloves if they are goin into your ass hole. i found that out the hard way. i think they are supposed to wear gloves though. im pretty sure 1 time i got just a striaght tug with glove, kinda weak, might as well havea condom on, never went back after that. also 1 time this asian woman sucked my cock at one of those 9with condom on) that was sketchyas fcuk though she couldnt even speak english
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think about all the losers that have come in for tugs before you, you think she washes her hands? Shes a fuckin' tug shop gal.
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you know me, every time you kiss that ho you blow me, you blow trial, try to walk a mile in my saucony's
so ur probably eatin out bitches from the club with dried cum still attached to their labia dont hate on me get that rawbertson money and stick ur dick in the dirt
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try to walk a mile in my saucony's
Wish I could. You have canadian adventures up there. I salute you.
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you know i actually live pretty far south. id say at least 1/4 of the USA is more north than where I live.
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=kitchener,+ontario&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=34.259599,56.162109&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Kitchener,+Waterloo+Regional+Municipality,+Ontario,+Canada&ll=41.244772,-84.726562&spn=32.399122,56.162109&t=h&z=4 (http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=kitchener,+ontario&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=34.259599,56.162109&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Kitchener,+Waterloo+Regional+Municipality,+Ontario,+Canada&ll=41.244772,-84.726562&spn=32.399122,56.162109&t=h&z=4)
but we still have tim horton's.
(http://gregpike.ca/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/tim_hortons.jpg)
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i am back on fucking dating websites now
This speaks volumes of your pathetic life.
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tryin my best man, sorry i wasnt born as cool, successful and popular as you!
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You'd be better off taking home the rub and tug machine. Atleast she knows what she has to do to pay the bills. That, adds character.
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no my mom doesnt like black people i swear. one time she asked me why i wasnt going out with ally any more and i said "she is goin out with a black dude now" and she got really bummed. after the black dude she came back to me, then she switched to an asian, so i am very confused about my dick size.
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so?
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i am very confused about my dick size.
My fuckin' goodness, dude. You are a living god of skate-related messageboarding amongst mere man-boys of skate-related messageboarding.
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amen to that. a fuckin men.
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no, they usually only wear gloves if they are goin into your ass hole. i found that out the hard way. i think they are supposed to wear gloves though. im pretty sure 1 time i got just a striaght tug with glove, kinda weak, might as well havea condom on, never went back after that. also 1 time this asian woman sucked my cock at one of those 9with condom on) that was sketchyas fcuk though she couldnt even speak english
First, let me say your past few posts have been some of the best ever.
Now, you've said a lot in this thread, so let's keep it honest- What did the rub and tug girl do to your asshole?
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you know me, every time you kiss that ho you blow me, you blow trial, try to walk a mile in my saucony's
so ur probably eatin out bitches from the club with dried cum still attached to their labia dont hate on me get that rawbertson money and stick ur dick in the dirt
hell yeah, rawb. droppin wu lyrics followed by raw rawb knowledge. so uplifting.
(and what did that girl do to your booty?)
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ok so i went into the joint and the girl had big titties... they always ask you if you have been here before... i always just say no cause i have noticed different girls charge different tips... so anyway you pay i think 40 or 50 to get in the door at this place and she says "tipping starts at 40$, 60$ for topless, $80 for bottomless, $100 you get to touch me back, $120 for reversal". so I threw down 120$, thinking that I was going to get to bang her or something.
so she takes off her clothes and she is kind of fat actually she has a brutal gut kind of and talking about how she is a "boarder chick". so she starts doin the normal deal, massage your back, you know, tickle your balls a bit, then you flip over they jerk you... she gets like tons of lube and i see her gettin the glove and she starts jerkin me again and then sneaks her finger in my ass hole... i jumped and said "whoa you dont gotta do that" shes like "relax this is going to be amazing"... i could actually feel my boner fading big time. she starts fingerin my butt hole and jerking my limp dick. eventually she stops with the butt stuff and finishes it normal, and she says "so how did you like the anal playage" (that quote is verbatim) and i said "i didnt really like it" and she said "oh you will love it when you get older".
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you just waited until she eventually stopped fingering your asshole?
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rawb, you just won the internet.
Best story ever, and its not even in real confessions.
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you just waited until she eventually stopped fingering your asshole?
well she said it was gonna be good, i thought it was gonna be like that movie road trip or some shit
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i am goin out with this chick on friday
(http://pics.plentyoffish.com/dating/75/45/t13zu5e2y4_101359585-2.jpg)
what does bbw mean?
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ok so i went into the joint and the girl had big titties... they always ask you if you have been here before... i always just say no cause i have noticed different girls charge different tips... so anyway you pay i think 40 or 50 to get in the door at this place and she says "tipping starts at 40$, 60$ for topless, $80 for bottomless, $100 you get to touch me back, $120 for reversal". so I threw down 120$, thinking that I was going to get to bang her or something.
so she takes off her clothes and she is kind of fat actually she has a brutal gut kind of and talking about how she is a "boarder chick". so she starts doin the normal deal, massage your back, you know, tickle your balls a bit, then you flip over they jerk you... she gets like tons of lube and i see her gettin the glove and she starts jerkin me again and then sneaks her finger in my ass hole... i jumped and said "whoa you dont gotta do that" shes like "relax this is going to be amazing"... i could actually feel my boner fading big time. she starts fingerin my butt hole and jerking my limp dick. eventually she stops with the butt stuff and finishes it normal, and she says "so how did you like the anal playage" (that quote is verbatim) and i said "i didnt really like it" and she said "oh you will love it when you get older".
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i am goin out with this chick on friday
(http://pics.plentyoffish.com/dating/75/45/t13zu5e2y4_101359585-2.jpg)
what does bbw mean?
BBW Big Beautiful Women
BBW Big Black Women
BBW Beautiful Black Women
BBW Bath & Body Works
BBW Broadband Wireless
BBW Big Bad Wolf
BBW Buyer Beware
BBW Brake-By-Wire
BBW Big Bisexual Woman
BBW Broken Bow, Nebraska (Airport Code)
BBW Boston Beer Works (Boston, MA)
BBW Brass Band World
BBW Be Back Whenever
BBW Baseball Writers Association of America
BBW Business Building Workshop
BBW Big Beached Whale
BBW Bayrische Bohrerwerke (German: Bayrische Drill Works)
BBW Balfour Beatty Workplace (London, England)
make your choice!
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ok so i went into the joint and the girl had big titties... they always ask you if you have been here before... i always just say no cause i have noticed different girls charge different tips... so anyway you pay i think 40 or 50 to get in the door at this place and she says "tipping starts at 40$, 60$ for topless, $80 for bottomless, $100 you get to touch me back, $120 for reversal". so I threw down 120$, thinking that I was going to get to bang her or something.
so she takes off her clothes and she is kind of fat actually she has a brutal gut kind of and talking about how she is a "boarder chick". so she starts doin the normal deal, massage your back, you know, tickle your balls a bit, then you flip over they jerk you... she gets like tons of lube and i see her gettin the glove and she starts jerkin me again and then sneaks her finger in my ass hole... i jumped and said "whoa you dont gotta do that" shes like "relax this is going to be amazing"... i could actually feel my boner fading big time. she starts fingerin my butt hole and jerking my limp dick. eventually she stops with the butt stuff and finishes it normal, and she says "so how did you like the anal playage" (that quote is verbatim) and i said "i didnt really like it" and she said "oh you will love it when you get older".
Just reading that makes my Junk feel weird.
Only thing that comes to mind "you gotta pay that troll toll to get into this boys hole"
The ultimate reversal, Next time give her 100$ and a box of steak-ums and tell her you want the universal.
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ok so i went into the joint and the girl had big titties... they always ask you if you have been here before... i always just say no cause i have noticed different girls charge different tips... so anyway you pay i think 40 or 50 to get in the door at this place and she says "tipping starts at 40$, 60$ for topless, $80 for bottomless, $100 you get to touch me back, $120 for reversal". so I threw down 120$, thinking that I was going to get to bang her or something.
so she takes off her clothes and she is kind of fat actually she has a brutal gut kind of and talking about how she is a "boarder chick". so she starts doin the normal deal, massage your back, you know, tickle your balls a bit, then you flip over they jerk you... she gets like tons of lube and i see her gettin the glove and she starts jerkin me again and then sneaks her finger in my ass hole... i jumped and said "whoa you dont gotta do that" shes like "relax this is going to be amazing"... i could actually feel my boner fading big time. she starts fingerin my butt hole and jerking my limp dick. eventually she stops with the butt stuff and finishes it normal, and she says "so how did you like the anal playage" (that quote is verbatim) and i said "i didnt really like it" and she said "oh you will love it when you get older".
This is gold!
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Expand Quote
i am goin out with this chick on friday
(http://pics.plentyoffish.com/dating/75/45/t13zu5e2y4_101359585-2.jpg)
what does bbw mean?
BBW Big Black Women
BBW Beautiful Black Women
BBW Bath & Body Works
BBW Broadband Wireless
BBW Big Bad Wolf
BBW Buyer Beware
BBW Brake-By-Wire
BBW Big Bisexual Woman
BBW Broken Bow, Nebraska (Airport Code)
BBW Boston Beer Works (Boston, MA)
BBW Brass Band World
BBW Be Back Whenever
BBW Baseball Writers Association of America
BBW Business Building Workshop
BBW Big Beached Whale
BBW Bayrische Bohrerwerke (German: Bayrische Drill Works)
BBW Balfour Beatty Workplace (London, England)
make your choice!
(http://nicoleirene.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/fingers_crossed.jpg)
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my god rawb. that's it, i'm re-friending you on facebook
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I still can't believe people on here actually wanted to ban Rawb.
Rawb you got any other good hooker stories?
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Expand Quote
ok so i went into the joint and the girl had big titties... they always ask you if you have been here before... i always just say no cause i have noticed different girls charge different tips... so anyway you pay i think 40 or 50 to get in the door at this place and she says "tipping starts at 40$, 60$ for topless, $80 for bottomless, $100 you get to touch me back, $120 for reversal". so I threw down 120$, thinking that I was going to get to bang her or something.
so she takes off her clothes and she is kind of fat actually she has a brutal gut kind of and talking about how she is a "boarder chick". so she starts doin the normal deal, massage your back, you know, tickle your balls a bit, then you flip over they jerk you... she gets like tons of lube and i see her gettin the glove and she starts jerkin me again and then sneaks her finger in my ass hole... i jumped and said "whoa you dont gotta do that" shes like "relax this is going to be amazing"... i could actually feel my boner fading big time. she starts fingerin my butt hole and jerking my limp dick. eventually she stops with the butt stuff and finishes it normal, and she says "so how did you like the anal playage" (that quote is verbatim) and i said "i didnt really like it" and she said "oh you will love it when you get older".
Just reading that makes my Junk feel weird.
Only thing that comes to mind "you gotta pay that troll toll to get into this boys hole"
The ultimate reversal, Next time give her 100$ and a box of steak-ums and tell her you want the universal.
damn it you son-of-a-bitch, you stole my gif! haha, oh well.
(rawb, i want to here more of your sexcapades. this is very heartwarming and epic. very, very epic.
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yes give us more, best thread in a long time
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MDRawbertson is my dude. Pound that chick. I want stories from this fucking date. My life's been slow lately(always).
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i realized the other night that the reason she didnt jerk me was pure karma
i was on the dating website back in the winter ( i was still living at my parents house) and i was talkin to this girl for like 4 days adn we went to this place by my house I really like its a nice pub and the owner is only like 28 or so and i always bring decent looking girls in there and we talk about music and beer a lot.
anyway im waiting outside i just walked down she drove down and she gets out of the car and shes so fat... im like fuck... so i go in the owner dude was like "oh, hey" looked super awkward. so i got a philly cheesesteak and she copies me and she is disgusting to watch eat. i could hardly think of a thing to say to her. so at the end i am like fuck it ill pay and bounce then i have no reason to stay with her any longer, she grabs it before i can even and says "i got this".
so im like "fuck she must really want to please" so she is drivin me back home and my parents are gone for the weekend, i am just like fuck it i need to bust, so i invite her in, shes down. she weighs like 250 man im tellin you shes big. anyway we go into my basement dungeon and start makin out right away and i go to finger bang her and she says "nah i cant im on my period" so im like "damn". but shes like "yeah but that doesnt mean you dont get a treat" and she sucks my wang and i get to titty fuck her. then the next day i invite her over same deal, we didnt even really talk or hang out at all. i just pure titty fucked her all nigth.
then i just never talked to her again, she left shaun of the dead at my house i saw her on msn so i asked her if she wanted her movie back and she said shed rather never see me again
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another time i was talkin to this girl on there and she looked mad hot and sounded super cool but she lived like an hour away so i was like hesitant to go meet her, anyway she talks me into it... so i go down there and this fucking dude answers the door... so im like "hey does samantha live here" and hes like "yeah yeah, shes here, come in" i go in there are 2 fat bitches sittin on the couch, look nothin like the pics. some super awkward convo goes down literally like 2 sentences tops... like "how was the drive" "good" "whats the weather like" "not bad", then i say "im gonna go make a run @ Tim's, anyone want anything?" and they gave me 5$ to get them stuff... i bounced back home.
the fuckin bitch messages me sayin she is gonna call the cops and shit, i spent that 5 up on a porn mag cause internet was down had to go home and jerk it.
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this thread is so damn amazing.
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rawbertson, you are a dirty man who probably didnt deserve that girl who wouldnt put out. because she is a nice girl with a future to worry about.
with that said. i fully back you.
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Those last two stories were pretty great.
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Rawb, the uniter.
It's like story time at the library and we're all seated in a loose circle, legs crossed Indian-style, leaning forward, listening intently to every word that the story teller, Mr. Rawbertson, is reading aloud from his picture book of fat bitches he's boob-jobbed.
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this thread is really taking off, Rawb keep posting more internet dating sotries, you are on your way to classic slap.
p.s. the timmies run move was beyond street smart.
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Hahaha the tim's run had me dying
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the first time i ever saw titties, i had this girlfriend for like half a year and she didnt do shit and she broke up with me. so year or so passes i was like 18 all my friends had already gotten laid like so long ago. i see her at a party we went to my parents' house after canada day fireworks and started makin out. i had taken off a girls bra once before but it took me like 15 min and she freaked out and put it back on i never got to see nothing... anyway i got it off the new girl and her tits looked like dog shit. she stops and she says "I want more than this" so i said "i have a condom" and she said "no thats not what i meant... i dont want to just fool around" and i said "do you want to be my girlfriend again?" and she says yeah that was what she meant. so we start making out and she was really psyched... she says "so do you want to get that condom out" im like convinced im finally gonna get laid.
so she puts it on i just lay down on the couch and she starts sucking my dick with the condom on, im drunk, needless to say it was shit. so then i said "i wanna put my dick between your tits". so i start titty fucking her with a condom on, but it sucks because 1. her tits look like cellulose pieces of shit and are too small and 2. i am wearing a fucking condom. she says something like "i dont have the best tits for this". and i said "yeah i just want to fuck you so bad" and she started crying and totally ruined the moment. she said "why do you have to say it like that". so i started fingerblasting her but that didnt help.
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and she started crying and totally ruined the moment. she said "why do you have to say it like that". so i started fingerblasting her but that didnt help.
i just laughed so hard, incredible. comedy gold right here.
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one thing that is clear, rawb loves to titty fuck a gal
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Tim Horton's dip-out was pure genius. In a way, she did get you laid since you spent her cash on porn.
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there are a couple stories i want to say but they are just so pathetic and like i dont even know if theyd be worth telling like so many times a girl gives me a hand job and doesnt even finish and like shes almost there that shit pisses me off to no extent and i never have the balls to say anything.... i once knew a dude who jerked off in the girls bathroom after even so i guess im not the only one
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rawb there are no words. other than i love you
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Dusty G delete that shit outta here... You've got no business posting in this thread.
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only because u have posted more than me and it makes u cooler ::)...sarcasm.
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^kook'd
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damn rawb, you've got us on the edge of our seats! i want some more titty-fucking and fingerblasting tales. don't hold back by thinking a story is too pathetic or weak. just let it out, man. we're all just in awe of your radness.
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Jesus, you've got some balls Rawb. Pulling this shit is one thing, but your willingness to share your tales is awesome.
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i just realized last night there has only been one girl that let me fuck her regularly in my whole life. she swallowed too i didnt even request it at all, but it was like her mission
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your new mission is to seek her out get soem regular sex.
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I think it's time that this thread be moved to Full Gnar.
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I'm too regular to photoshop anything but if any of you have any free time.....can you do up a photo of like some fingers with lazers beams coming out...
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SO glad I clicked on this thread
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one time i was going out with this indian girl, fuck i would do like anything to get her back, she only weighed 92 pounds... my god she was amazing... anyway she was kind of shy i had her down in the dungeon and i got her fully naked but she wouldnt really do anything i had to like physically put her hand on my dick to get her to jerk... anyway
1 time we went to a party i got realyl fuckin drunk and i think i accidently fingered her butt instead of her pussy, although she didnt seem to mind... the reason i think this is because it didnt seem as wet as normal. she was tryin to jerk me but had this fucked up ring or something, i jsut remember it being extremely painful and i had to get her to stop. shit was just so awkward after that night. i asked her if she wanted to fuck and she said ok, i tried to get my dick in but it did not work, i just kept mashing it up against her shit. i have a feeling i may have been hitting butt again. we still talk and she is on that fucking dating website like every single day i see her online and she said she hasnt had time to go on any dates.
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i have a feeling i may have been hitting butt again.
Destined to become a classic thread. Rawb, you're doing the Lord's work.
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Rawb needs an epicly laterd episode. O'dell should just follow him around and document his conquests. My world is certainly a better place after hearing some of this shit.
i just realized last night there has only been one girl that let me fuck her regularly in my whole life. she swallowed too i didnt even request it at all, but it was like her mission
We need a picture of this chick.
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I think it's time that this thread be moved to Full Gnar.
I think it's time we let rawb into Full Gnar...
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one time i was going out with this indian girl, fuck i would do like anything to get her back, she only weighed 92 pounds... my god she was amazing... anyway she was kind of shy i had her down in the dungeon and i got her fully naked but she wouldnt really do anything i had to like physically put her hand on my dick to get her to jerk... anyway
1 time we went to a party i got realyl fuckin drunk and i think i accidently fingered her butt instead of her pussy, although she didnt seem to mind... the reason i think this is because it didnt seem as wet as normal. she was tryin to jerk me but had this fucked up ring or something, i jsut remember it being extremely painful and i had to get her to stop. shit was just so awkward after that night. i asked her if she wanted to fuck and she said ok, i tried to get my dick in but it did not work, i just kept mashing it up against her shit. i have a feeling i may have been hitting butt again. we still talk and she is on that fucking dating website like every single day i see her online and she said she hasnt had time to go on any dates.
when i become a pal my sole mission would be to get rawb back to positive rep. thank you for sharing this.
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Expand Quote
one time i was going out with this indian girl, fuck i would do like anything to get her back, she only weighed 92 pounds... my god she was amazing... anyway she was kind of shy i had her down in the dungeon and i got her fully naked but she wouldnt really do anything i had to like physically put her hand on my dick to get her to jerk... anyway
1 time we went to a party i got realyl fuckin drunk and i think i accidently fingered her butt instead of her pussy, although she didnt seem to mind... the reason i think this is because it didnt seem as wet as normal. she was tryin to jerk me but had this fucked up ring or something, i jsut remember it being extremely painful and i had to get her to stop. shit was just so awkward after that night. i asked her if she wanted to fuck and she said ok, i tried to get my dick in but it did not work, i just kept mashing it up against her shit. i have a feeling i may have been hitting butt again. we still talk and she is on that fucking dating website like every single day i see her online and she said she hasnt had time to go on any dates.
Agreed, dude have the gnarliest stories ever
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(http://i1030.photobucket.com/albums/y365/magic_pizza/Tard%20Loaf/RedDwarf.jpg)
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(http://i1030.photobucket.com/albums/y365/magic_pizza/Tard%20Loaf/RedDwarf.jpg)
This thread is now the best thing on slap!
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Hey Rawb, I just checked out that plenty of fish site, and I'd suggest switching to okcupid. there are way more attractive women on that site, and you can mack instantly. I hope this will give you more awesome stories to share with us.
sincerely,
Goblinshark
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fuck yeah, this rules and put a regular smile on my face
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classic
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rawb is so damn amazing.
Fixed.
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(http://i1030.photobucket.com/albums/y365/magic_pizza/Tard%20Loaf/RedDwarf.jpg)
As much as I love that other thread, I am not a lying man, this is truth.
Rawb, I had the same kind of experience with an Indian girl too. Vagina just all of a sudden went MIA, coupled with other unfortunate circumstances though. Either way, I'm glad we have this small connection.
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it speaks volumes about slap that rawb does not have +10,000 rep. this thread is incredible and that MSN shaun of the dead messenger situation was the best thing i have ever read.
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Expand Quote
(http://i1030.photobucket.com/albums/y365/magic_pizza/Tard%20Loaf/RedDwarf.jpg)
As much as I love that other thread, I am not a lying man, this is truth.
Rawb, I had the same kind of experience with an Indian girl too. Vagina just all of a sudden went MIA, coupled with other unfortunate circumstances though. Either way, I'm glad we have this small connection.
Hilarious LOL
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it speaks volumes about slap that rawb does not have +10,000 rep. this thread is incredible and that MSN shaun of the dead messenger situation was the best thing i have ever read.
It makes more sense at this point to pay your respects by kooking him.
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Hey Rawb, I just checked out that plenty of fish site, and I'd suggest switching to okcupid. there are way more attractive women on that site, and you can mack instantly. I hope this will give you more awesome stories to share with us.
sincerely,
Goblinshark
no. apparently whatever rawb is doing is working wonders based on his stories. dudes living an awesome life.
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Haha it really psychs me that you'd say that... I get really bummed on myself a lot but I really shouldn't I mean I'm sure shit like this happens to everyone.
I am on my way home from this stupid fuckin wedding and I saw the tim hortons that me and katie used to walk to lasty summer.
My friend dan was dating katie and she was so hot and she played guitar. Dan eventually broke up with her and I moved in on my moms advice.
Anyway so this story is called the last legit handjob.
So I pissed away friday afternoon drinking one june friday and I went home at 10 pm. I went on msn and chad was on and I asked him if he wanted to blaze and he said yeah. My dad knew I was drunk and said I wasn't allowed to drive. I had to also make up a lie about coming home then going right back out again. I rode my bike about 15km on a dark dark foresty road and we blazed a double swisher blunt if bombs. Katie texted ne sayingf she was chilling at ths dump dump pile of fuck bar in a park and she wanted me to come pick her up.
So I ride my bike down and she is hanging out with greasy 40 year olds and I somehow steal her away and convince one of these fags to give us a ride home in his pick up truck. She was with a friend too.
So we get back to her place and we ditch the friend. She starts literally grabbing my hand and putting multiple fingers inside her vag for blastoise. I go to town on her. Then she gives me that line she doesn't want to do nothing else. I said well we don't have to fuck. She says well I can give you a bj and I say ok, I prefer titty, but even hand is ok. She goes and gets paper towels. She is on top of me and her sis walks in, but doesn't ruin the mood. She hjd me and I slept well. Last legit handjob.
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This is amazing. I have never laughed so hard from a thread. I actually am not even laughing at you rawb, more with you than anything. Your sexual misadventures are amazing, you are an everyman hero like Bukowski or that American Splendor guy. I thought your raps were dumb, but fucking god damn these stories are amazing.
At least with that one chick you got a dvd out of the crushing blow to your ego.
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Haha it really psychs me that you'd say that... I get really bummed on myself a lot but I really shouldn't I mean I'm sure shit like this happens to everyone.
I am on my way home from this stupid fuckin wedding and I saw the tim hortons that me and katie used to walk to lasty summer.
My friend dan was dating katie and she was so hot and she played guitar. Dan eventually broke up with her and I moved in on my moms advice.
Anyway so this story is called the last legit handjob.
So I pissed away friday afternoon drinking one june friday and I went home at 10 pm. I went on msn and chad was on and I asked him if he wanted to blaze and he said yeah. My dad knew I was drunk and said I wasn't allowed to drive. I had to also make up a lie about coming home then going right back out again. I rode my bike about 15km on a dark dark foresty road and we blazed a double swisher blunt if bombs. Katie texted ne sayingf she was chilling at ths dump dump pile of fuck bar in a park and she wanted me to come pick her up.
So I ride my bike down and she is hanging out with greasy 40 year olds and I somehow steal her away and convince one of these fags to give us a ride home in his pick up truck. She was with a friend too.
So we get back to her place and we ditch the friend. She starts literally grabbing my hand and putting multiple fingers inside her vag for blastoise. I go to town on her. Then she gives me that line she doesn't want to do nothing else. I said well we don't have to fuck. She says well I can give you a bj and I say ok, I prefer titty, but even hand is ok. She goes and gets paper towels. She is on top of me and her sis walks in, but doesn't ruin the mood. She hjd me and I slept well. Last legit handjob.
I died.
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Rawb you gotta up your confidence with chicks. Offered a bj, asked to t-f her, then settled for a hj? Come on now. Did she even use lotion or just raw dog it? You earned that bj, rode your bike across town for that shit.
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i know man but at that point i was just dyin for ANYTHING kinda like right now... the fat chick emailed me sayin she is excited to meet me so hopefully she turns out to be decent... i can take a bit fat, but not like obese brutal unhealthy
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Haha it really psychs me that you'd say that... I get really bummed on myself a lot but I really shouldn't I mean I'm sure shit like this happens to everyone.
I am on my way home from this stupid fuckin wedding and I saw the tim hortons that me and katie used to walk to lasty summer.
My friend dan was dating katie and she was so hot and she played guitar. Dan eventually broke up with her and I moved in on my moms advice.
Anyway so this story is called the last legit handjob.
So I pissed away friday afternoon drinking one june friday and I went home at 10 pm. I went on msn and chad was on and I asked him if he wanted to blaze and he said yeah. My dad knew I was drunk and said I wasn't allowed to drive. I had to also make up a lie about coming home then going right back out again. I rode my bike about 15km on a dark dark foresty road and we blazed a double swisher blunt if bombs. Katie texted ne sayingf she was chilling at ths dump dump pile of fuck bar in a park and she wanted me to come pick her up.
So I ride my bike down and she is hanging out with greasy 40 year olds and I somehow steal her away and convince one of these fags to give us a ride home in his pick up truck. She was with a friend too.
So we get back to her place and we ditch the friend. She starts literally grabbing my hand and putting multiple fingers inside her vag for blastoise. I go to town on her. Then she gives me that line she doesn't want to do nothing else. I said well we don't have to fuck. She says well I can give you a bj and I say ok, I prefer titty, but even hand is ok. She goes and gets paper towels. She is on top of me and her sis walks in, but doesn't ruin the mood. She hjd me and I slept well. Last legit handjob.
trying to trade sex stories with you is like David trying to butt fuck Goliath but Ive got a fucked up/sad/awesome hj story from my innocent times. in middle school, I was an animal that wanted to squirt man juice more than catching pokemons so i solicited a black girl that got in fights with all the other girls into giving me a tuggie in the bathroom. she was going at it and it was bliss untill a sharp sting was felt at the dick vessels. apparently, she jerked it so hard that she ruptured one of the veins and blood was acting as a natural tug lube. i freaked out and pushed her so she hit her head on the urinal. she was now bleeding also. we were both confused and scared of consequences so we agreed to never let out what happened. it was a shitty deal since she got a band aid telling the nurse she hit her head during break while i had to rap my piece with my tightie whities and bleed my shameful blood. luckily the vessel healed and i am still in business.
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This is amazing. I have never laughed so hard from a thread. I actually am not even laughing at you rawb, more with you than anything. Your sexual misadventures are amazing, you are an everyman hero like Bukowski or that American Splendor guy. I thought your raps were dumb, but fucking god damn these stories are amazing.
At least with that one chick you got a dvd out of the crushing blow to your ego.
I would give anything to read the Canadian splendor, not so sure about a movie about it tho
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Anyway so this story is called the last legit handjob.
seriously one of the greatest things i have ever read. my life is better because you exist. sig'ed
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Expand Quote
Haha it really psychs me that you'd say that... I get really bummed on myself a lot but I really shouldn't I mean I'm sure shit like this happens to everyone.
I am on my way home from this stupid fuckin wedding and I saw the tim hortons that me and katie used to walk to lasty summer.
My friend dan was dating katie and she was so hot and she played guitar. Dan eventually broke up with her and I moved in on my moms advice.
Anyway so this story is called the last legit handjob.
So I pissed away friday afternoon drinking one june friday and I went home at 10 pm. I went on msn and chad was on and I asked him if he wanted to blaze and he said yeah. My dad knew I was drunk and said I wasn't allowed to drive. I had to also make up a lie about coming home then going right back out again. I rode my bike about 15km on a dark dark foresty road and we blazed a double swisher blunt if bombs. Katie texted ne sayingf she was chilling at ths dump dump pile of fuck bar in a park and she wanted me to come pick her up.
So I ride my bike down and she is hanging out with greasy 40 year olds and I somehow steal her away and convince one of these fags to give us a ride home in his pick up truck. She was with a friend too.
So we get back to her place and we ditch the friend. She starts literally grabbing my hand and putting multiple fingers inside her vag for blastoise. I go to town on her. Then she gives me that line she doesn't want to do nothing else. I said well we don't have to fuck. She says well I can give you a bj and I say ok, I prefer titty, but even hand is ok. She goes and gets paper towels. She is on top of me and her sis walks in, but doesn't ruin the mood. She hjd me and I slept well. Last legit handjob.
holy fuck!!! i would have been freaking! after i fucked around with that indian chick that hurt my dick with the ring i couldnt even jerk off for like a few days, also there was all this weird goo like substance which was probably pussy juice and a lot of long strands of hair all tucked in so i like slept with all that shit just chilling
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Ok, that urinal story just reminded me of one.
Back in 1999 I was in the Air Force and hanging out at this lame bar on base. I had just walked in and this girl who worked in another section walks right up and asks if I am with anyone. I replied that I wasn't and she said "Well come with me back to my room." While we are walking up the stairs I can clearly see that she is way past drunk, so I decide to just make sure she gets to her room and head back. She is super drunk and doing the whole mumbling thing as she is trying to get her keys, so I get her keys and open her room up and she walks in and goes to flop on the bed and she kinda misses it and bounces off the corner and goes face first into a nightstand. She is knocked out cold and blood is just gushing out of her face. I panic and sit her up and she is just mumbling and doesn't feel a thing. I had no idea what to do, so I went to the next room over where her supervisor was staying. Right before I knocked on his door I look at my hand and since I was a plane mechanic, my hands were just beat to shit, and I started wondering if he would think I hit her. He answers and I give him a very brief rundown and his response was, "Shit, again?" She had apparently done this sorta thing before. We went back and she was just kinda sitting there all bloody and touching her lip and crying. He took care of it from there. I saw her a few days later, back at the bar. She had knocked out a couple teeth and her face was just wrecked. She came up to me and apologized and bought me a beer.
rawb would have talked her into giving him a bloody handjob first haha
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Ok, that urinal story just reminded me of one.
Back in 1999 I was in the Air Force and hanging out at this lame bar on base. I had just walked in and this girl who worked in another section walks right up and asks if I am with anyone. I replied that I wasn't and she said "Well come with me back to my room." While we are walking up the stairs I can clearly see that she is way past drunk, so I decide to just make sure she gets to her room and head back. She is super drunk and doing the whole mumbling thing as she is trying to get her keys, so I get her keys and open her room up and she walks in and goes to flop on the bed and she kinda misses it and bounces off the corner and goes face first into a nightstand. She is knocked out cold and blood is just gushing out of her face. I panic and sit her up and she is just mumbling and doesn't feel a thing. I had no idea what to do, so I went to the next room over where her supervisor was staying. Right before I knocked on his door I look at my hand and since I was a plane mechanic, my hands were just beat to shit, and I started wondering if he would think I hit her. He answers and I give him a very brief rundown and his response was, "Shit, again?" She had apparently done this sorta thing before. We went back and she was just kinda sitting there all bloody and touching her lip and crying. He took care of it from there. I saw her a few days later, back at the bar. She had knocked out a couple teeth and her face was just wrecked. She came up to me and apologized and bought me a beer.
I was going to say, I'm pretty surprised she remembered you after that episode. But then again, your eyes are pretty unforgettable.
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Give us more Rawb
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Give us more Rawb
Yeaaah, what happened with your date?
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i stilll havent went yet... she said saturday we can hang out and watch a movie at her apartment. her pics never show her titties, if she has small titties and she is fat ill be pissed
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i stilll havent went yet... she said saturday we can hang out and watch a movie at her apartment. her pics never show her titties, if she has small titties and she is fat ill be pissed
That's a rarity but it does happen. The pear shape, but none of the goods. Be careful of that my friend.
How do we get one of those gizmodo live blog things? Rawb can you give us minute by minute posts just in case my Saturday sucks (it probably will).
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i stilll havent went yet... she said saturday we can hang out and watch a movie at her apartment. her pics never show her titties, if she has small titties and she is fat ill be pissed
How do we get one of those gizmodo live blog things? Rawb can you give us minute by minute posts just in case my Saturday sucks (it probably will).
Yes please do that, my saturday will suck so do it
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the only important part is if i get to bust a nut on her gut
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Amen
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fuckin bitch said she fell at work and couldnt come out, FUCK that is a GAME fuck you and your fatness i slam 90 and i dont fucking bail out
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damn. she sounds like she's a big one. Only old people and really fat people get taken out by a simple fall to the ground. How far did she fall?
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
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...remember when some assholes on here were crying to mods to ban this poet? Not one of them have ever made a post half as amazing as that one. He's not even trying.
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Yo man i suggest you Fucc that bitch asafp
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fuckin bitch said she fell at work and couldnt come out, FUCK that is a GAME fuck you and your fatness i slam 90 and i dont fucking bail out
YouTube - Broadcast Yourself. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3IQTjOMewg#)
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
Amazing.
Sig'd. Thanks, Rawb.
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
Amazing.
Sig'd. Thanks, Rawb.
FFFFUUUUUUU
you beat me to it! i even opened up the "reply" page in a new tab
rawb i love you
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Oooh baby I like it Raaawwwwb
Oooh baby I like it Raaawwwwb
(nohomo)
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
Did you offer your BBW some red lobster? She might have toughed it out for some cheddar biscuits.
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
Amazing.
Sig'd. Thanks, Rawb.
FFFFUUUUUUU
you beat me to it! i even opened up the "reply" page in a new tab
rawb i love you
Sorry, man. I was in need. It was either that or the first sentence, which is also great.
Flat ground slam.
Once, while loitering drunk at MIT, some super fat lady gave my friends and I free sandwiches. We were really psyched. Approximately 90 seconds later, she ate shit just walking as we were passing her by. Oh, we tried and tried to contain ourselves, but one homie's capacitor was malfunctioning and he exploded like a kettle whistling with the deepest laughter imaginable. That, of course, was all that the rest of us could handle and so we stood there, laughing like maniacs at a fat woman's flat ground slam mere moments after she had given us sandwiches. Total assholes.
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and so we stood there, laughing like maniacs at a fat woman's flat ground slam mere moments after she had given us sandwiches.
sig'd
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Rawbertsons Wonderful Horrible Life ( RWHL ) ?.
On some PJ Ladd shit right there ,coming out of nowhere with life style bangers .
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Rawbertsons Wonderful Horrible Life ( RWHL ) ?.
On some PJ Ladd shit right there ,coming out of nowhere with life style bangers .
haha! even better maybe because i don't have to look at that Southie moron
that line about your grandmother bailing on a 4 set and going to red lobster was another one of the greatest things i have ever read.
Rawb make a book like that "A million little pieces" novel, but we all know you can back it up 110%. a million little posts.
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
i cant justify dropping that kind of dough on a ho after last time, i need to drop actual dough like a baker then maybe she'll open that hole
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
i cant justify dropping that kind of dough on a ho after last time, i need to drop actual dough like a baker then maybe she'll open that hole
HAHAHAHA
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to me it sounds like it was just a flat ground slam, if it was down a 2 block or something id have a little more sympathy. i saw my grandma bail off a 4 set once in my house and she even got up and came to red lobster after. stupid cleaning lady waxed the fuck out of the floors and grams had new socks on.
i cant justify dropping that kind of dough on a ho after last time, i need to drop actual dough like a baker then maybe she'll open that hole
fucking hell man , you need to set up a paypall acount or something so I can buy you a beer
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Rawb's like the nerd in Can't Hardly Wait. At first, people clown on him endlessly, then after rapping shirtless at the house-party-of-the-year about a skateboard website and various ho-related issues, he blossoms into a double flippin' Based God figure. Bitches flocking is the next logical step.
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I'm hoping somehow we can get Rawb on a reality show. Either next year's Jersey Shore, or maybe his own Rawb North America Tour. The world needs to hear your stories.
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I'm hoping somehow we can get Rawb on a reality show. Either next year's Jersey Shore, or maybe his own Rawb North America Tour. The world needs to hear your stories.
he should have his own show where he is looking for a chill obese girl that he can tittyfuck
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i have a cam i just dont have a filmer i should take a trip up to different pals houses and they can film me chilling
when i fingerblasted that chick from a few weeks ago she saw my cam and the 3ccd thing is always reflective and she was like "is that on?" and i was like no the battery isnt even in it... she was like "oh guys with cameras always creep me out" like fuck as if id leave the shit out in the open like that if i were tryin to voyeur
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i have a cam i just dont have a filmer i should take a trip up to different pals houses and they can film me chilling
when i fingerblasted that chick from a few weeks ago she saw my cam and the 3ccd thing is always reflective and she was like "is that on?" and i was like no the battery isnt even in it... she was like "oh guys with cameras always creep me out" like fuck as if id leave the shit out in the open like that if i were tryin to voyeur
You should start your own candid camera-style show where you hide a camera in your room and point out the blinking red light once you're massaging that cervix.
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keep trying bud. you'll do fine
http://www.banthis.com/videos/2251/Amazing-Biker-Recovery.html (http://www.banthis.com/videos/2251/Amazing-Biker-Recovery.html)
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so what is the logical next step now for me to get the best tittyfuck and also spending the least amount of money?
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i went on plenty of fish again, i got some emails from some decent girls, i wish i wasnt at owrk so i could post, there is this one that is actually really fucking hot on that ok cupid and she actually messaged me but i probably blew it in my re-message
so anyway on plent of fish this fucking disgusting ass girl writes me a message (and trust me girls never write me messages) and i write her back and she says "add me to msn [email protected]" or something like that, lol. anyway she lives in this small ass town like 30 min away and like maybe 2 lines into the conversation she says "we should hang out sometime" then maybe 2 more lines int othe convo she says "i have this idea lets watch paranormal activity 2 then hang out after" then "what are you doing tonight"
she is just dyin to fuck, i am playing settlers tonight so fuck that, i might just go hit it, i dont know im just so jonsed but she looks like dog shit. in high school we had this ex convict who was apparently reformed come in and talk to our law class and he said "a hole is a hole and a pair of lips is a pair of lips". there is this normal lookin chick who said she wants to hang out with me next week.
is that greasy if im banging this baneling then switching up next week to the normal one? the gross chick probs doesnt care if i bang her once then bounce cause she is getting to bang rawb (a self proclaimed celebrity) and to her i am probably next level
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Haha, getting taste reccomendations from the ex convict who came to school to threaten you.
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Haha, getting taste reccomendations from the ex convict who came to school to threaten you.
There was a janitor in my highschool that had '69' tatooed on the inside of his lower lip and he would go up to chicks in the halls and do that 2 finger pussy licking gesture while pulling down his lower lip to show the tat.
I have no idea how he didn't get fired.
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the gross chick probs doesnt care if i bang her once then bounce cause she is getting to bang rawb (a self proclaimed celebrity) and to her i am probably next level
That's god damn right. Post a pic and we'll rate her later. We won't steer you wrong.
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What is Settlers? Some kins of wagon train LARP shit?
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What is Settlers? Some kins of wagon train LARP shit?
I hope so, that was the line that had me gasping.
At my old job at a bowling alley, we had a new mechanic for the summer; a husky dude from New Jersey who claimed many amazing sexual conquests and acted like his dick was the Covenant. He once told me that all you need to look for is a "warm, moist hole." I asked him if he'd fuck a dude then and he stomped off.
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(http://www.toy-tma.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/settlers-of-catan-board-game.jpg)
(http://photos3.meetupstatic.com/photos/event/8/b/7/e/highres_3215710.jpeg)
(http://images.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/People-playing-Settler-settlers-of-catan-521910_1024_768.jpg)
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i went on plenty of fish again, i got some emails from some decent girls, i wish i wasnt at owrk so i could post, there is this one that is actually really fucking hot on that ok cupid and she actually messaged me but i probably blew it in my re-message
so anyway on plent of fish this fucking disgusting ass girl writes me a message (and trust me girls never write me messages) and i write her back and she says "add me to msn [email protected]" or something like that, lol. anyway she lives in this small ass town like 30 min away and like maybe 2 lines into the conversation she says "we should hang out sometime" then maybe 2 more lines int othe convo she says "i have this idea lets watch paranormal activity 2 then hang out after" then "what are you doing tonight"
she is just dyin to fuck, i am playing settlers tonight so fuck that, i might just go hit it, i dont know im just so jonsed but she looks like dog shit. in high school we had this ex convict who was apparently reformed come in and talk to our law class and he said "a hole is a hole and a pair of lips is a pair of lips".? there is this normal lookin chick who said she wants to hang out with me next week.
is that greasy if im banging this baneling then switching up next week to the normal one? the gross chick probs doesnt care if i bang her once then bounce cause she is getting to bang rawb (a self proclaimed celebrity) and to her i am probably next level
It's Friday. It's a balmy 47 degrees in my area. That means it's time to hear more rawb online dating adventures. So tell me sport, how's the fishing trip been this week?
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yeah rawby, you baneling busted any ass recently?
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Someone find me some pictures of Rawb. I want to do something with them.
(not jack off to them)
(maybe)
(no homo)
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I wasn't regularly coming to Slap for awhile, but thanks to a slow day at work just had the chance to read this thread front to back. One of the funniest threads I can remember in my Slap history.
Rawb, this shit is bumped like the many many cervixes you have bumped into oblivion with your finger blasting prowess.
Please don't leave us just hangin'. The fat chick with small tits?! The gross Harry Potter chick?! The normal looking chick?!
We need to know.
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(http://images.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/People-playing-Settler-settlers-of-catan-521910_1024_768.jpg)
YouTube - Broadcast Yourself. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cS_8I90VdJY#)
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epic. we at least need a 'day in the life'
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RipGrip you need to make a Rawb sculpture. Fuckin microphone and a blunt in one hand, knuckle deep fingerblastin with the other, glasses all hittin the ground after landing a v-heel and shit.
You know how many of those you could sell on Slap?
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RipGrip you need to make a Rawb sculpture. Fuckin microphone and a blunt in one hand, knuckle deep fingerblastin with the other, glasses all hittin the ground after landing a v-heel and shit.
You know how many of those you could sell on Slap?
millions
.......
any new story's rawb ??
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fuck lately has just been fucked.
i went to the dog park and met this girl off plenty of fish. she had this awesome golden retriever just like mine but a little smaller. i said "i miss school, i love how you can just take a day off if you arent feeling it" and she is like "well i dont take days off because of that" and just general bitchyness eventually led to her being very opinionated and pissed me off cause it was cold out.
then she says "you dont smoke weed do you?" and i was like "no, of course not" and shes like "ok good, cause that is a deal breaker. im in college to become a cop". convo went really awkward from there and we parted ways she seemed to want to meet again. i went on msn and she was on sayin whats up hey doll all this kitten shit, then i just said "you know what its not that i care about the weed thing i just fuckin hate cops" and block+delete.
there is this MDMA friend i have, last weekend he did MDMA, mushrooms, and acid all at once and staye dup for 3 days straight. he was acting really fucked up about a year ago like the dude who took too much acid on slc punk but now he seems fine which is weird because he seems to be doing more drugs than ever.
he lives with these korean pro gamers they are amzing at sc2 but pro for wow specifically (just platinum league in sc2 ) and they were also tripping and this Harvey's employee chick came over and was listening to me play guitar. then we sung the night they drove old dixie down toghether. she is fat but has big titties, but she is short so she doesnt seem as fat. anyway so we part ways i came back to MDMA's last fiday she was there and i told her her hair looked nice she got it dyed or whatever and she was SUPER diggin me, but i didnt get a chance to get alone with her. she seemed so impressed that i have a car. i think its a done deal but i have this weird thing on my dick at the base its like a zit or something FUCK
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thank you
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then she says "you dont smoke weed do you?" and i was like "no, of course not" and shes like "ok good, cause that is a deal breaker. im in college to become a cop". convo went really awkward from there and we parted ways she seemed to want to meet again. i went on msn and she was on sayin whats up hey doll all this kitten shit, then i just said "you know what its not that i care about the weed thing i just fuckin hate cops" and block+delete.
That is nothing short of a boss maneuver. Breaking future cops' hearts has got to feel so good. Fuck the police.
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thank you rawbertson
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Made my day.
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i think its a done deal but i have this weird thing on my dick at the base its like a zit or something FUCK
Happens to the best of us Rawb. Pop that shit, it'll go away in time for you to titty fuck the short fatty with the tits.
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"you know what its not that i care about the weed thing i just fuckin hate cops" and block+delete.
I nearly choked.
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holy shit, rawb has a dick zit! thanks for the great update, man.
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YouTube - Broadcast Yourself. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jREUrbGGrgM&feature=fvst#)
good form, rawb.
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Rawb is down with all sorts of nasty fat chicks, but when it comes to a police chick, he draws the line.
Fan-fucking-tastic.
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i turned off avatars cause shit was too slow....wake me up when someone makes one with lazers shooting out of a finger with the word 'BLASTOISE' below it....
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get this man on Howard Stern ASAP.
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i turned off avatars cause shit was too slow....wake me up when someone makes one with lazers shooting out of a finger with the word 'BLASTOISE' below it....
you're welcome
(http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/8217/blastoise1.gif)
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Fuck, rawb seriously has kept it real.
I had a dick zit once rawb, i went and showed my doctor in a panic, and he was like, "no worries bro, its a dick zit, wear a condom when you fuck sluts, brah"
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i was worried it might be stds but i have been eating a lot of mcdonalds. it seems to be going away. i only ever banged 1 girl without a condom anyway and she was my girlfriend for like a year im pretty sure i would have already died cause that was a few years ago now. although can you get shit from a girl suckin your dick raw? one time the worst worst girl ever sucked my dick for like 2 seconds, but that was like 3 or 4 years ago. i always felt this horrible feeling like i might be giving my girlfriend aids but im pretty sure she would have been dead already, she was weak.
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im sure you are fine.
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i was worried it might be stds but i have been eating a lot of mcdonalds. it seems to be going away. i only ever banged 1 girl without a condom anyway and she was my girlfriend for like a year im pretty sure i would have already died cause that was a few years ago now. although can you get shit from a girl suckin your dick raw? one time the worst worst girl ever sucked my dick for like 2 seconds, but that was like 3 or 4 years ago. i always felt this horrible feeling like i might be giving my girlfriend aids but im pretty sure she would have been dead already, she was weak.
Where do I even begin? This is incredible, indescribable to anyone outside of SLAP. FYI, you can get STDs from mouth-to-mushroom tip, but not from McD's. Although I'm not sure what they're doing up in Canada, can't be worse than the ones in the U.S. They're banning Happy Meals over here.
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i always felt this horrible feeling like i might be giving my girlfriend aids but im pretty sure she would have been dead already, she was weak.
Only the strong survive in this world. It's your world buddy. Nicely done.
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yeah i heard u cant get aids from a girl suckin ur dick but u can get herps and shit like that, i dont even really know what STDs are i have looked them up but you dont learn anything off wikipedia, its like trying to learn about starcraft from newbs. i dotn know anyone that has one or have even heard about anyone that has one through rumourmill, but my friend also said that our city has a super high STD rate, doesnt make any sense to me.
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Rawb, definitely go down to your local clinic and pick up a brochure. Don't wind up like Billy Waldeman.
YouTube - Broadcast Yourself. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ynkrIE7q_Wg#)
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yeah but that shit was all mad years ago i probably would haev noticed by now if i got something right?
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in all likelihood, you probably carry some kind of dormant hpv.
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u cant give a chick aids from titty fuckin tho unless she is lactating or some shit
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"no worries bro, its a dick zit, wear a condom when you fuck sluts, brah"
hahaha
u cant give a chick aids from titty fuckin tho unless she is lactating or some shit
This is true. I confirmed it with my physician.
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how'd you do that shit, for a second I thought my doctor had a slap account.
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u cant give a chick aids from titty fuckin tho unless she is lactating or some shit
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in all likelihood, you probably carry some kind of dormant hpv.
Do you live in NC, strangefires?
I think Chris Niraetko (sp?) shouted you out in the most recent Skateboard Mag in a Dan Plunkett interview...
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i was worried it might be stds but i have been eating a lot of mcdonalds.
best thing i've heard in a while
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in all likelihood, you probably carry some kind of dormant hpv.
Do you live in NC, strangefires?
I think Chris Niraetko (sp?) shouted you out in the most recent Skateboard Mag in a Dan Plunkett interview...
i heard, but i have yet to see
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on my list of shit i intend to do before i die, i wanted to fuck a black chick. after crossing it off the list and being hyped on my success, i realized i caught something from her (after she said she was clean). the realization after fucking a 43 year old (was on the list) and my ex.
a man should be able to take legal action against a woman if they knowingly withhold medical information that will effect our penises.
trust no ho
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on my list of shit i intend to do before i die, i wanted to fuck a black chick. after crossing it off the list and being hyped on my success, i realized i caught something from her (after she said she was clean). the realization after fucking a 43 year old (was on the list) and my ex.
a man should be able to take legal action against a woman if they knowingly withhold medical information that will effect our penises.
trust no ho
Seriously, they can sue us for giving them a goddamn baby, why not the other way around?
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a man should be able to take legal action against a woman if they knowingly withhold medical information that will effect our penises.
trust no ho
Lol, that's fuckin stupid. It's your own choice to fuck them. It's your fault. If you were worried you should have asked for an STD test, if she declined I guess you don't fuck her. You were controlled by lust and looked what happened...no one should feel sorry for you.
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a man should be able to take legal action against a woman if they knowingly withhold medical information that will effect our penises.
trust no ho
ewwwwww. You just basically used the justification for not doing AIDS research in the 80's. Everybody wants to fuck. That's why new generations of people and animals continually appear. Lets not pretend the people who caught something are any sleazier than the people who didn't
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Seriously its their fault if they know they have it. I dodged a bullet with the herpes (as told in another thread) and she came on to me super strong when I was wasted. Thankfully, i was as drunk as i was so I couldn't do the deed. I heard from my friend a week later that she had herpes and I was seriously contemplating violence but I'm clean thank Joe Pesci. Women and men should be held responsible if they know they have that shit. Its just so fucked up
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Crass is just feeling holy because he's in a well-communicated, monogamous relationship and is forgetting that not every man is going to pause a woman whose hand is gently wrapped around his good brain, and ask her to relinquish papers of good sexual health, or henceforth, wait a fortnight to have tests produced so they may assume the sideways jitterbug. It works both ways, if you have something, you tell the other person. Don't wait to be asked, be responsible.
But all I really want to know is how pruny Rawb's fingers are this weekend after his undoubtedly soaked Friday night on plenty of fish.
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If you know you have an STD and don't tell your partner, you can be sued: it's battery. Michael Vick was sued by a Jane Doe in 2005 for giving her herpes. He was going to clinics around the country getting meds under the name Ron Mexico.
Ron Mexico. hahahaha!!
hamburglar fucked himself though by breaking Rule no. 1
1. Never Trust A Bitch
it's as simple as that, really. if you're that horny that you're willing to throw your dick in some uncharted waters and you don't know the hoe, then that's on you. straight up putting your dick in danger for a nut.
quick, someone get hamburglar this tank top before it's too late!!
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_znetMyxM0Pk/S7nZQZraS0I/AAAAAAAAEf8/RpbdryxAkwU/s400/neverTrustaHoe.png)
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good luck finding a chick that will fuck you after you ask her if she has that shit. If she knows she has it and straight out refuses to tell you when you do the deed, then that shit is on her. Also by your logic, any woman is uncharted waters if they are so fucking untrustworthy, so I would advise you not to have sex at all, but I'm sure you've got that part covered.
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good luck finding a chick that will fuck you after you ask her if she has that shit. If she knows she has it and straight out refuses to tell you when you do the deed, then that shit is on her. Also by your logic, any woman is uncharted waters if they are so fucking untrustworthy, so I would advise you not to have sex at all, but I'm sure you've got that part covered.
geez, this is fucking SLAP for god's sake. i was simply joshing around. people act more serious than my parents on here. cool off, guy.
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What'd she give you?
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Look guys, quit giving Rawb's thread an STD.
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If you know you have an STD and don't tell your partner, you can be sued: it's battery. Michael Vick was sued by a Jane Doe in 2005 for giving her herpes. He was going to clinics around the country getting meds under the name Ron Mexico.
If it's AIDS/HIV, you can be charged with murder or attempted murder.
Crass is just feeling holy because he's in a well-communicated, monogamous relationship and is forgetting that not every man is going to pause a woman whose hand is gently wrapped around his good brain, and ask her to relinquish papers of good sexual health, or henceforth, wait a fortnight to have tests produced so they may assume the sideways jitterbug. It works both ways, if you have something, you tell the other person. Don't wait to be asked, be responsible.
Henceforth, fortnight, and sideways jitterbug all in one post? I like it.
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this thread needs more rawb
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Today was my first time reading this thread, and holy fuck am I blown away by Rawbs awesomness.
That being said
quit giving Rawb's thread an STD.
And
this thread needs more rawb
PS- Fingerblasting, tittyfucking, whaling, and blastoise-ing has been burned into my skull forever.
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PS- Fingerblasting, tittyfucking, whaling, and blastoise-ing has been burned into my skull forever.
New pokemon: Rawbertson used fingerblast!
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this thread needs more rawb
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blastoise-ing
Someone explain this one.
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Someone explain this one.
Anyway so this story is called the last legit handjob.
So I pissed away friday afternoon drinking one june friday and I went home at 10 pm. I went on msn and chad was on and I asked him if he wanted to blaze and he said yeah. My dad knew I was drunk and said I wasn't allowed to drive. I had to also make up a lie about coming home then going right back out again. I rode my bike about 15km on a dark dark foresty road and we blazed a double swisher blunt if bombs. Katie texted ne sayingf she was chilling at ths dump dump pile of fuck bar in a park and she wanted me to come pick her up.
So I ride my bike down and she is hanging out with greasy 40 year olds and I somehow steal her away and convince one of these fags to give us a ride home in his pick up truck. She was with a friend too.
So we get back to her place and we ditch the friend. She starts literally grabbing my hand and putting multiple fingers inside her vag for blastoise. I go to town on her. Then she gives me that line she doesn't want to do nothing else. I said well we don't have to fuck. She says well I can give you a bj and I say ok, I prefer titty, but even hand is ok. She goes and gets paper towels. She is on top of me and her sis walks in, but doesn't ruin the mood. She hjd me and I slept well. Last legit handjob.
(http://pokebeach.com/scans/wizards-theme-deck-variants/2-blastoise-trainer-deck-b-misty.jpg)
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Fuck rawb my own life has been super boring lately .Not trying to push you or anything , but please keep this thread alive , Any new blastoiseng stories or fingerblasting action??
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Anyway so this story is called the last legit handjob.
So I pissed away friday afternoon drinking one june friday and I went home at 10 pm. I went on msn and chad was on and I asked him if he wanted to blaze and he said yeah. My dad knew I was drunk and said I wasn't allowed to drive. I had to also make up a lie about coming home then going right back out again. ? I rode my bike about 15km on a dark dark foresty road and we blazed a double swisher blunt if bombs. Katie texted ne sayingf she was chilling at ths dump dump pile of fuck bar in a park and she wanted me to come pick her up.
So I ride my bike down and she is hanging out with greasy 40 year olds and I somehow steal her away and convince one of these fags to give us a ride home in his pick up truck. She was with a friend too.
So we get back to her place and we ditch the friend. She starts literally grabbing my hand and putting multiple fingers inside her vag for blastoise. I go to town on her. Then she gives me that line she doesn't want to do nothing else. I said well we don't have to fuck. She says well I can give you a bj and I say ok, I prefer titty, but even hand is ok. She goes and gets paper towels. She is on top of me and her sis walks in, but doesn't ruin the mood. She hjd me and I slept well. Last legit handjob.
couldve got head but let her off easy with a handjob. a true gentleman.
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man i am so close on getting this new girl to bang... there has been this party at my friends house the last 4 weekeneds in a row i keep getting way too drunk though because its always on friday. i think i need to start taking naps after work on fridays. but yeah i keep falling asleep.
the last two times she keeps trying to get me in a room with no one else and someone ALWAYS fucking walks in! I am so embarrassed cause she is definitley fat but i love her titties so i can look past the fatness.
we were sitting in a chair for 1 person and i felt really warm just sitting beside her cause she is producing a lot of body heat. i cant wait to get my greasy hands in there.
she texted me today which is good. i dont think a girl has texted me first like ever. i was a little unsure if she was still going to like me cause i danced up an insane storm last night and sweated profusely and then drove drunk home and that usually will make chicks not like you anymore. (well i wasnt relaly drunk but if i woul dhave got pulled over i would have went to jail. but my house was only 10 blocks away i just didint want to half to walk all the way back in the morning) but she didnt seem to notice. so yeah fingers crossed
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man i am so close on getting this new girl to bang... there has been this party at my friends house the last 4 weekeneds in a row i keep getting way too drunk though because its always on friday. i think i need to start taking naps after work on fridays. but yeah i keep falling asleep.
the last two times she keeps trying to get me in a room with no one else and someone ALWAYS fucking walks in! I am so embarrassed cause she is definitley fat but i love her titties so i can look past the fatness.
we were sitting in a chair for 1 person and i felt really warm just sitting beside her cause she is producing a lot of body heat. i cant wait to get my greasy hands in there.
she texted me today which is good. i dont think a girl has texted me first like ever. i was a little unsure if she was still going to like me cause i danced up an insane storm last night and sweated profusely and then drove drunk home and that usually will make chicks not like you anymore. (well i wasnt relaly drunk but if i woul dhave got pulled over i would have went to jail. but my house was only 10 blocks away i just didint want to half to walk all the way back in the morning) but she didnt seem to notice. so yeah fingers crossed
Oh, she noticed my friend. Bad boy Rawb and his I don't give a fuck attitude was all that girl needs! She texted you because she wanted some of your dick before you either found somebody else or died. You, sir, are unpredictable.
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we were sitting in a chair for 1 person and i felt really warm just sitting beside her cause she is producing a lot of body heat.? i cant wait to get my greasy hands in there.
holy shit hahahahahaha
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i hate myseld for when i used to hate on rawb.
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(http://www.halolz.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/halolz-dot-com-supersmashbrosmelee-pokemon-blastoiselove.jpg)
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we were sitting in a chair for 1 person and i felt really warm just sitting beside her cause she is producing a lot of body heat.?? i cant wait to get my greasy hands in there.
QOTY
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(http://www.halolz.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/halolz-dot-com-supersmashbrosmelee-pokemon-blastoiselove.jpg)
HYDROPUMMPP!!!!!
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People (including me) need to stop posting when there aren't updates. I keep seeing it up at the top and hoping that there is a celebration going on of Rawb finally getting laid, and I get people commenting on the humor of the blastoise metaphor, and am let down.
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AHAHAHAHAAH I just google searched "blastoise". Never knew it was a Pokemon character.
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rawb, would you be her "writter" and titty fuck this broad?
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs1211.snc4/156383_1628081194397_1607584099_31491900_44830_n.jpg)
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someone needs to collect all of rawbs posts and put them on a blog
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FRIDAY NIGHT is the girls birthday. all dick zits cleared up, pubes plucked according to watson's thread (thx). she invited me personally. i have to make sure i have a nap after work and drink tons of caffeine after because i have to make sure im on point. i CANNOT fuck this up. there will probably be lots of shots of tequila and shit so i gotta prep for this. i am pretty good at keeping up with people drinking unless it involves more than 10 shots. i am going to just walk down and leave my car at home i think to make sure i sleep in her disgusting debauchery dormatory.
I love titties, and so do you. Anyone who tells you they don't is only fooling themselves. Chicks dont like girls with bigger titties than them because that is basically competition. this guy i know who is really fucked up said "im not really into titties, im more into ass". you can be MORE into ass but you cannot rule out titties, if you are saying you dont care about titties you are lying or there is something wrong with you.
going back to primordial times, when rawbertson the 7th was hunting and shit, he was tryin to acquire women too, and he didnt want his troops dyin, he had to make sure his kids had plenty milk. so he titty fucked his way to glory, and look where we are today. i would not be here if it werent for that ancient love of titties.
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I salute you, Sir!
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someone needs to collect all of rawbs posts and put them on a blog
There's fansites all over the internet: http://rawbuttson.blogspot.com/ (http://rawbuttson.blogspot.com/)
I love titties, and so do you.
Get your greasy hands on 'em, Rawb.
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That blog sucks. We need Watson to get his shit together and start his own rawb blog. He could sell shirts and shit with rawb quotes on them and make a million bucks.
that shit about the cop girl and the fat girl feeling good beside him cause she emits so much body heat are some of the absolute greatest things ive ever read.
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20 minute power nap Rawb, that's all you need. Any more and you'll fall asleep at the tit like a baby getting breastfed. And we want you to go the distance.
Metacafe - Online Video Entertainment - Free video clips for your enjoyment (http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1399396/)
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YouTube - Broadcast Yourself. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjaOQP_xn6Y#)
YouTube - Broadcast Yourself. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pr9oW8Gt1iA#)
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Rawb, like kenny powers youre just not an ass man. youre a tit man. you like big ass boobs, now and forever
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fuck yeah, Rawb!! good luck tonight and hopefully you'll get some tail.
going back to primordial times, when rawbertson the 7th was hunting and shit, he was tryin to acquire women too, and he didnt want his troops dyin, he had to make sure his kids had plenty milk. so he titty fucked his way to glory, and look where we are today. i would not be here if it werent for that ancient love of titties.
pure gold.
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Is there a pic of birthday girl (and hopefully those tits)? I want to give my support to this.
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I love titties, and so do you. Anyone who tells you they don't is only fooling themselves. Chicks dont like girls with bigger titties than them because that is basically competition. this guy i know who is really fucked up said "im not really into titties, im more into ass". you can be MORE into ass but you cannot rule out titties, if you are saying you dont care about titties you are lying or there is something wrong with you.
Damn straight.
Also, I back Rawb starting this rawb blog. I see it being spotted by hollywood producers who buy the rights and turn this into the sleazy julia and julia or whatever the fuck that movie based on a blog was called starring McLovin in his first breakout lead role.
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all dick zits cleared up, pubes plucked according to watson's thread (thx).
Ahahah no problem brother. But seriously I don't think you need to worry about wookie dick with the fatties. That's one of the great things about fatties. They'll take what they can get.
going back to primordial times, when rawbertson the 7th was hunting and shit
So if Rawbertson the 7th was in primordial times, what fuckin Rawbertson does that make you?! Rawbertson the 653, 567, 384th?
Oh yeah and thanks for the new quote.
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This thread survives = slap's soul survives. :-* Thank you for your new posts Rawb.
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i too hadn't read this thread from the beginning. just want to express my appreciation for bringing me such joy
rawb needs his own blog, straight up
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Well don't keep us in the dark Rawb! Or have you been on a 3 day titty fucking binge?
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FUCK! I can't get shit going on. just wasnt working out i couldnt get her alone again on friday night, i tried to chill with her sunday and monday night but our schedules were conflicting. she isnt back til new years or so, i am tryin to get herto coem to my friends party with a keg and shit, wont be so many people and shit then i will be able to murder those areolas
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As much as I am enjoying imagining it, I would like a more detailed description as to what exactly "murdering areolas" entails. Please.
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you can't force genius, narcissus
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Sorry, I was getting greedy.
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...and shit then i will be able to murder those areolas
Is anybody going to sig that? It seems worthy. I'd run that for a while.
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dead girls don't say no
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when Rawb gets blueballed, all of SLAP gets blueballed
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when Rawb gets blueballed, all of SLAP gets blueballed
When Rawb gets laid, it will be like we all did.
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Expand Quote
when Rawb gets blueballed, all of SLAP gets blueballed
When our fingers become inexplicably pruney, we can smile knowing that Rawb's fingers just strummed a girl's G-spot like a harp.
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Expand Quote
Expand Quote
when Rawb gets blueballed, all of SLAP gets blueballed
When our fingers become inexplicably pruney, we can smile knowing that Rawb's fingers just strummed a girl's G-spot like a harp.
loooool
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Than I am going to run with it.
Continuous victories to Rawb in the new year.
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Than I am going to run with it.
Continuous victories to Rawb in the new year.
Hows the new year going rawb? how was the new years eve??
any super awesome stories??
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Come on Rawb, this thread is the only thing I like about Slap anymore. Hook us up. What'd you do with all them humps? All them humps up on them sluts?
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Don't leave us out in the cold like this. Share your gift.
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:'(
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i havent got fucken shit! im fucking pissed!!!!!! like no chances even i dont know whats going on
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Damn Rawb, hang in there. Eventually the word will get around how you can start a forest fire with clit friction and the ladies will be knockin your door down.
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Rawb, I have been following this thread for a while and you have brought me much mirth, I even thought I saw you from the bus one time last year when I was in Guelph...anyway...I am sorry to hear of you current dry spell and frustrations, im sending you good will through the internet.
remember its all about persistance!
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I suggest Rawb take the rampage to the okcupid streets. We need content.
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YouTube - Broadcast Yourself. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUebpo7bpUo#)
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thanks yo, i am gonna try for some shit tonight. i blew it with the fat chick.
we were all chillin like the fat chick and a bunch of friends, and somehow we got talking about like how much you care about looks in someone (i was kind of drunk i knew this was a bad thing to talk about) and i said something like "yo i would never hit anything over 180".
anyway the girl said "GEE, THANKS MIKE" and got super pissed and didnt speak to me again. I honestly didn't even think she was over 180.
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awesome as usual
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There go your chances of becoming a carney and working the "Guess your Age or Weight" booth
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Rawb, I have been following this thread for a while and you have brought me much mirth, I even thought I saw you from the bus one time last year when I was in Guelph...anyway...I am sorry to hear of you current dry spell and frustrations, im sending you good will through the internet.
remember its all about persistance!
thats sick, i dont really go to Guelph that much, but i have been there a bunch of times for sure. I was going to this one skate park there for a really long time when i used to live in cambridge. they tore it down now though which blows. it had the best manual pad ever it was higher than a curb. i was there filming some skating one day, thats really random that you saw me though! thats sick! i am going to be in toronto a lot this summer, not sure if thats where you live. there are so many hot girls there, i have to move there.
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I had a dream the other night I was walking to get food in Toronto somewhere with Zurg and we ran into Rawb, but he was sorta embarassed to be associated with Slap and dissed us with fetus and his posse. He ended up eating accross the street from where Zurg wanted to buy a hideous quilted Chicago Bulls cap.
Later we witnessed a dude having his head run over by a doubledecker bus and Zurg was watching like it wasn't a big deal while I looked away and then we were riding on a big mattress on top one of the busses and I started losing my grip and probably fell to a violent death in the streets of future 2150 Toronto.
I know dream recaps from other people are boring as fuck, but the slap related ones you just gotta share.
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huh? that happened, it was last summer. i bought that bulls cap btw
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I said it last summer and I'll say it again, I have a feeling that Saudi man is not selling original Chicago Bulls merchandise.
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This show I Used To Be Fat just came on MTV and the chick in it has a cute face, and big fat chick tits, but she's pretty fat. She's talking about how she's never been on a date, and never kissed a boy or anything. All I could think was "Damn girl, Rawb would rock your fucking world."
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I have a date with this petite asian girl on saturday holy fuck i am so hyped she is only 19, 5'2", not even fat at all. She has glasses too. She is already saying she wants to meet me and hang out at my apartment on Saturday.
The only thing im worried about is her thing on plenty of fish says "Christian - Other" as religion, so hopefully she isnt on any bullshit where you dont fuck. i mean i need companionship as much as the next human, but i need to fuck, this is not an option. i am dying here. will fingerblast for hj.
Im not greedy or selfish for saying that, am I? I mean who would I be kidding if I said I just want this girl to come hang out at my house and have my mind run wild with all the debauchery i would unfold on those mammories while we sit and play fucking mario party. i mean i love mario party, dont get me wrong, I am willing to put in the work, I just hate playing games that are not Starcraft 2. Her thing says "Dating" and not "Hang out", I have went down that path before, BULLSHIT.
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baneling bust dat ass
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and all is right with the world
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"will fingerblast for hj"
That's what's up.
Damn, there are a bunch of Toronto pals here. I had no idea. We should go hit the streets sometime
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i would unfold on those mammories while we sit and play fucking mario party.
Fuck man, there's nothing I can say to elevate the verbal tapestry you just weaved in front of me. It's so beautiful.
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please don't switch from the fatty team to the asian team.....
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and all is right with the world
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bump
so what went down?
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OK who the fuck let this get to page 6? I'm fingerblasting this thread back to the front!
Ps: I I'm seeing a girl now from Okcupid who is awesome and I just showed her this thread. She fully supports your tittyfucking crusade and we still believe in you Rawb!
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Expand Quote
Ask her to pay next time because you're uncomfortable paying for her affection. It's the modern version of this:
The Door Test (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mLqshL0WEk#ws)
thats a killer movie
how did the kid do? did he dump her?
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I was at a bar last night and this was on the menu
(http://s4.postimage.org/nkhbxtwk/IMG00093_20110228_2043.jpg) (http://postimage.org/image/nkhbxtwk/)
Sorry for the shitty quality
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(http://s4.postimage.org/7qscrjzi1/IMG00093_20110228_2043.jpg)