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Skateboarding => USELESS WOODEN TOY BANTER => Topic started by: goatsucker on March 09, 2012, 08:15:23 PM
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what secrets does the industry keep from us?
someone informed me cons is owned by nike i was pretty bummed to hear it but i had no clue
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jereme rogers owns crailtap
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what secrets does the industry keep from us?
someone informed me cons is owned by nike i was pretty bummed to hear it but i had no clue
i didn't even know this was a secret! let see if i can be more of a bummer
vans is owned by a women's fashion company. AWS, habitat, gravis, (there for analog?) is owned by burton. witch probably owned by someone else.
coca cola owns mcdonalds.
oprah owns DLX.
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riley hawk is actually just tony's clone
sammy baptista is actually goofy
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what secrets does the industry keep from us?
someone informed me cons is owned by nike i was pretty bummed to hear it but i had no clue
i didn't even know this was a secret! let see if i can be more of a bummer
vans is owned by a women's fashion company. AWS, habitat, gravis, (there for analog?) is owned by burton. witch probably owned by someone else.
coca cola owns mcdonalds.
oprah owns DLX.
Dyrdek owns AWS now
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Pro skateboarders make very little money , industry makes millions.
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shane o neil is a victim of illuminati programming/mind control . contrary to popular disbelief, his girlfriend is indeed made entirely of plastic.
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braydons bat-tat isn't permanent, but merely a marketing ploy
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kostons actually a pretty serious guy
berra street skates every night by himself
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I measure the length of my dry spell by how long my pubes are
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theotis is antwuans step brother
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PUMA bought Volcom... zzzzzzz
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[quote a1uthor=mandibleclaw link=topic=60537.msg1639314#msg1639314 date=1331356825]
riley hawk is actually just tony's clone
sammy baptista is actually goofy
[/quote]
I knew it!
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I measure the length of my dry spell by how long my pubes are
"just measure the length of your pubes, ya dingus!"
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Pro skateboarders make very little money , industry makes millions.
some of your favorite pros still live with their parents
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None of us really skates, it is all just one big Matrix, built by Matix. How else do you think that company stays in buisness. Of course if you get hurt inside the thing, real damage occurs as well.
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bam margera is back on toy, full part to drop soon.
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chris haslem and chad muska are the same person
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The entire industry really does have it out for Brian Wenning.
Berra and Koston are fighting Scientology from the inside.
Jaws doesn't really jump down big shit. His filmer just uses advanced camera techniques and Photoshop is rampant in the entire industry.
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Women poop from the vagina hole.
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The new Selfish ad is 'shopped.
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Weekendtage is serious business
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Pro skateboarders make very little money , industry makes millions.
Well it happens to every industry
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surplus_labour (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surplus_labour)
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gator was actually recruited by the us government to do spy missions in russia
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David: How are those magnets?
Michael Emerson: Huh?
David: Magnets, Michael. You're ollieing with magnets. How do they feel?
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The sheckler part is actually real
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a lot of bail photos get run (ran?) in ads
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Brooklyn Brawler isn't an asain from Toronto, he is actually is Jason Dill.
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theotis is antwuans son
And neither of them know.
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Spanky is in fact, Spanky from the Little Rascals
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everyone actually hates the gonz
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Pro skateboarders make very little money , industry makes millions.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surplus_labour (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surplus_labour)
Oh I understand but there is a disconnect between what the industry projects (recently I think of the interview with Appleyard talking about how much money(30k) he's blown smoking weed and how he's the first skater to buy a Jag) and the reality on the ground.
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Ricky Oyola collects doilies.
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everyone actually hates the gonz
because he's a cokehead
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The Real team doesn't ride the boards they sell.
Phelps is just the front for a board of directors, who pick the SOTY. They decide who the SOTY is based on who can be more marketable. Needless to say, Steve Rodriguez is on this board.
BATB is rigged.
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Tony Hawk is a pot head, and I think that's cool.
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frank white shot tupac.
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The reason why Bonite disappeared from Powell Peralta wasn't because it was a gimmick or a way to stretch out the company's wood budget, it was discontinued after a series of lawsuits from Santa Cruz, Vision, and I believe G&S because the other industry titans claimed Powell was monopolizing on what would/could have been the industry standard (as opposed to 100% Maple decks).
After a few years of legal wrangling, Powell was forced to either sell licenses of the technology or stop using it all together. One of the few things George and Stacy agreed upon business-wise was that it would be better to remove the technology than sell bits of it out, as it would take away from the unique advantage the company had at the time. It wound up being a bad decision, as they could have made a little money from the other companies and create a nice nest egg before the near downfall of the company just a few years later (Bones wheels and bushings wound up saving George from eating free government cheese).
Anyway, Bonite never came back because Powell retained the patent, which he was never sued for, he just shelved it.
The industry learned its lesson after seeing all that shit go down. During the peak of plastic-sheet slicks, only two manus really did those, and even today you can see the P2 decks (an NHS product) licensed out to companies like Black Box and whatever other non-NHS companies use it.
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The reason why Bonite disappeared from Powell Peralta wasn't because it was a gimmick or a way to stretch out the company's wood budget, it was discontinued after a series of lawsuits from Santa Cruz, Vision, and I believe G&S because the other industry titans claimed Powell was monopolizing on what would/could have been the industry standard (as opposed to 100% Maple decks).
After a few years of legal wrangling, Powell was forced to either sell licenses of the technology or stop using it all together. One of the few things George and Stacy agreed upon business-wise was that it would be better to remove the technology than sell bits of it out, as it would take away from the unique advantage the company had at the time. It wound up being a bad decision, as they could have made a little money from the other companies and create a nice nest egg before the near downfall of the company just a few years later (Bones wheels and bushings wound up saving George from eating free government cheese).
Anyway, Bonite never came back because Powell retained the patent, which he was never sued for, he just shelved it.
The industry learned its lesson after seeing all that shit go down. During the peak of plastic-sheet slicks, only two manus really did those, and even today you can see the P2 decks (an NHS product) licensed out to companies like Black Box and whatever other non-NHS companies use it.
I always thought the cardboard industry sued for giving them a bad name.
On a serious note, Gator's mom is Puerto Rican and the black and latin skate community have never mentioned this fact since 1991.
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The secret tape is on the roof, after you find it it keep going and you will also find carlsbad gap.
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sex with a gay man is the only 100% sure fire way to getting sponsored these days. it sounds crazy but take my advice, head down to your local "man hole". walk straight into that gay bar, backwards, with your pants down and go pro. unless of course you're under 18. in that case just do it god's way, and hang out at a catholic church until... you know how this tasteless joke ends.
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sex with a gay man is the only 100% sure fire way to getting sponsored these days. it sounds crazy but take my advice, head down to your local "man hole". walk straight into that gay bar, backwards, with your pants down and go pro. unless of course you're under 18. in that case just do it god's way, and hang out at a catholic church until... you know how this tasteless joke ends.
i can confirm that this post is 100% true
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antwuan is really straight edge. and it takes him 7 hours every morning to draw all his tattoo's on.
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(http://www.metalsucks.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/the_secret.jpg)
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THANK YOU ALL FOR THIS!
classic slap
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Brooklyn Brawler isn't an asain from Toronto, he is actually is Jason Dill.
you mean was an asian from toronto, but now is jason dill.
The Real team doesn't ride the boards they sell.
Phelps is just the front for a board of directors, who pick the SOTY. They decide who the SOTY is based on who can be more marketable. Needless to say, Steve Rodriguez is on this board.
BATB is rigged.
as much as i don't care for the berrics, this is very much untrue.
after buzz killing a few i thought i'd add that guy mariano was supposed to skate to a national acrobat by black sabbath for his mouse part. rick howard wasn't feeling it and switched the song.
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COTG is actually Tod Falcon.
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Shecklers father inspired Ryans back tatoo.
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Andrew Reynolds actually hates FS flips. He's just doing them to please the crowd...
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what secrets does the industry keep from us?
someone informed me cons is owned by nike i was pretty bummed to hear it but i had no clue
i didn't even know this was a secret! let see if i can be more of a bummer
vans is owned by a women's fashion company. AWS, habitat, gravis, (there for analog?) is owned by burton. witch probably owned by someone else.
coca cola owns mcdonalds.
oprah owns DLX.
truth is stranger than fiction...
on the whole "secret" thing, I thought it was always weird that ricky oyola posts here and some people still don't know his handle
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I mean fo rilz tho walmart boards got pretty good pop, and dey cheap
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when tony hawk did the first 900 at the 1999 xgames best trick contest it was clearly after time...they gave him to gold medal any way...
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what secrets does the industry keep from us?
someone informed me cons is owned by nike i was pretty bummed to hear it but i had no clue
i didn't even know this was a secret! let see if i can be more of a bummer
vans is owned by a women's fashion company. AWS, habitat, gravis, (there for analog?) is owned by burton. witch probably owned by someone else.
coca cola owns mcdonalds.
oprah owns DLX.
on the whole "secret" thing, I thought it was always weird that ricky oyola posts here and some people still don't know his handle
i know Drydek was in talks to buy AWS. but beyond that i never heard that the deal was done. and control had been moved to drydek. so i would think that burton still does own AWS.
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that mac products actually suck and are for assholes who think they have taste
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Neil Blender is skateboarding's best kept secret.
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Tom Penny has a twin. Rattray 1 upped JT at a Euro Circa demo to get on Zero. Not mind blowing but meh...
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jereme rogers owns crailtap
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Markovic dated shorty's Rosa and Danny Way was the first guy doing a 900...he claimed it in his interview in tws october 1991!
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sammy baptista is actually goofy
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michael sieben stole artwork that was created for the shaun white clothing line at target and has a career based off it
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jon allie never actually cut the rail that slash was trying to skate, but a second rail cutter on the grassy knoll did it. jon allie was the fall guy
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There's a false ceiling on tricks. Every pro and am can do stuff twice as hard/good as what they put out. To keep steady progression and not have the level rise too high and too fast, to keep the older generation of pro's valid. That's why dum am's like nick merlino got silenced and sent to foundation when he was killing it when he was baker flow.
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There's a false ceiling on tricks. Every pro and am can do stuff twice as hard/good as what they put out. To keep steady progression and not have the level rise too high and too fast, to keep the older generation of pro's valid. That's why dum am's like nick merlino got silenced and sent to foundation when he was killing it when he was baker flow.
it wouldn't surprise me if this is true. I remember an interview with Merlino where he says that he heard that Batface was threatened by his skating.
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ryan shecklers grandpa invented skateboarding
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people on mars use longboards instead to do tricks.
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There's a false ceiling on tricks. Every pro and am can do stuff twice as hard/good as what they put out. To keep steady progression and not have the level rise too high and too fast, to keep the older generation of pro's valid. That's why dum am's like nick merlino got silenced and sent to foundation when he was killing it when he was baker flow.
it wouldn't surprise me if this is true. I remember an interview with Merlino where he says that he heard that Batface was threatened by his skating.
Watch Guy Mariano's Epicly Later'd. The dude was blowing up Powell super hard, but Stacy told him to chill his game.
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waterloo shantell is jake duncombe
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paul rodriguez is a robot
antwaun went to harvard
rob dyrdek doesnt have knees
i didnt tell you
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Studies actually show that, in fact, nobody fits well on Krooked.
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There's a false ceiling on tricks. Every pro and am can do stuff twice as hard/good as what they put out. To keep steady progression and not have the level rise too high and too fast, to keep the older generation of pro's valid. That's why dum am's like nick merlino got silenced and sent to foundation when he was killing it when he was baker flow.
it wouldn't surprise me if this is true. I remember an interview with Merlino where he says that he heard that Batface was threatened by his skating.
Which interview? I want to know more
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Tony Hawk is a pot head, and I think that's cool.
I have heard this as well.
Edit: I thought of one, maybe this is self-evident to some but skate magazines have pretty heavy politics on who can be in a magazine. Since there is so little editorial space you usually need sponsors that pay advertising dollars to get photos run. I have a friend who was supposed to get an interview in a major magazine, his main sponsor stopped advertising in the magazine and they pulled the interview. Additionally, a photo usually needs to be taken by a photographer with a name or a known skater (as in at least one or the other) - the rationale for this is usually that it spreads the wealth/opportunities/exposure to those who are already established but a bi-product of this is that it creates a ceiling for newcomers. Lastly, and one I think some of you have heard is that those who pay more advertising dollars have requested that their rider get a photo run over another skater (if they did the same trick) or request their rider be put on a cover over another skater.
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Markovic dated shorty's Rosa and Danny Way was the first guy doing a 900...he claimed it in his interview in tws october 1991!
Not much of a secret if it was printed in a magazine. This old vert pro Jeff Jones actually claimed the 900 back in the '80s.
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Tony Hawk is a pot head, and I think that's cool.
Edit: I thought of one, maybe this is self-evident to some but skate magazines have pretty heavy politics on who can be in a magazine. Since there is so little editorial space you usually need sponsors that pay advertising dollars to get photos run. I have a friend who was supposed to get an interview in a major magazine, his main sponsor stopped advertising in the magazine and they pulled the interview. Additionally, a photo usually needs to be taken by a photographer with a name or a known skater - the rationale for this is usually that it spreads the wealth/opportunities/exposure to those who are already established but a bi-product of this is that it creates a ceiling for newcomers. Lastly, and one I think some of you have heard is that those who pay more advertising dollars have requested that their rider get a photo run over another skater (if they did the same trick) or request their rider be put on a cover over another skater.
Not the first time i heard this...
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if i told you it wouldn't be a secret anymore.
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Studies actually show that, in fact, nobody fits well on Krooked.
cept gonz ;)
p.s. this:
jon allie never actually cut the rail that slash was trying to skate, but a second rail cutter on the grassy knoll did it. jon allie was the fall guy
was a criminally underrated post.
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busenitz actually skates slow and has his footage sped up
The shake junt crew dont actually smoke weed
Berra is tearing down spots like carlsbad, brooklyn banks and hubba hideout until the berrics is the only famous "spot" left
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toan nguyen, jon nguyen, don nguyen, brandon nguyen, sean nguyen... they are all one family.
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Roger is subsidiary of Selfish.
Wenning has a fat twin who took over his career after the "retirement" part in DC video.
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jon allie never actually cut the rail that slash was trying to skate, but a second rail cutter on the grassy knoll did it. jon allie was the fall guy
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toan nguyen, jon nguyen, don nguyen, brandon nguyen, sean nguyen... they are all one family.
You forgot Quy Nguyen!
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Caswell Berry helped develop and spread a new form of herpes around the western united states and other dark corners of the world.
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Markovic dated shorty's Rosa and Danny Way was the first guy doing a 900...he claimed it in his interview in tws october 1991!
Not much of a secret if it was printed in a magazine. This old vert pro Jeff Jones actually claimed the 900 back in the '80s.
I remember Nieratko writing that Rich Lopes was doing 900's long before Tony, but that could have been outlandish pro-Jersey propaganda.
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Andrew Reynolds = Benjamin Button.
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The entire industry really does have it out for Brian Wenning.
Berra and Koston are fighting Scientology from the inside.
Jaws doesn't really jump down big shit. His filmer just uses advanced camera techniques and Photoshop is rampant in the entire industry.
you were actually falsely informed on this, he was in a serious accident when he was younger and lost his legs, they were replaced with prosthetic legs and in recent years updated with hydraulic knee's incorporated in the design
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Andrew Reynolds = Benjamin Button.
I think you may be on to something here...
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toan nguyen, jon nguyen, don nguyen, brandon nguyen, sean nguyen... they are all one family.
You forgot Quy Nguyen!
not only family ... same person ... just changeing the look due to a higher marketability ! ... if u dont know ... now you know!
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If you eat your own semen you can pass any drug test
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Jerry Hsu is actually black, they just lighten his skin color in ads/videos so he fits in better with enjoi
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Studies actually show that, in fact, nobody fits well on Krooked.
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Brooklyn Brawler isn't an asain from Toronto, he is actually is Jason Dill.
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The Real team doesn't ride the boards they sell.
Phelps is just the front for a board of directors, who pick the SOTY. They decide who the SOTY is based on who can be more marketable. Needless to say, Steve Rodriguez is on this board.
BATB is rigged.
after buzz killing a few i thought i'd add that guy mariano was supposed to skate to a national acrobat by black sabbath for his mouse part. rick howard wasn't feeling it and switched the song.
Damn you Rick Howard, damn you...
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Neil Blender is skateboarding's best kept secret.
wow!
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There's a false ceiling on tricks. Every pro and am can do stuff twice as hard/good as what they put out. To keep steady progression and not have the level rise too high and too fast, to keep the older generation of pro's valid. That's why dum am's like nick merlino got silenced and sent to foundation when he was killing it when he was baker flow.
it wouldn't surprise me if this is true. I remember an interview with Merlino where he says that he heard that Batface was threatened by his skating.
Which interview? I want to know more
I don't remember which one it was. I think it was from right before WTF came out. I'll look through some magazines and see if it was in any of them.
Edit: found it.
http://blog.ccs.com/go/article/view/253295/the-nick-merlino-interview (http://blog.ccs.com/go/article/view/253295/the-nick-merlino-interview)
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Here's a secret: CCS has the most hard-hitting interviews.
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Neil Blender is skateboarding's best kept secret.
for real though I feel like alot of people dont know that he had a hand in starting Alien Workshop.
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tony tave actually is chris dobstaff
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Element pretends to be a "green enviro sensitive do gooder metro male anti war love company but in reality they cut down trees and make pretty much every thing else from oil and do most of it in china so they can pay kids fifty cents a day to make big profits for pseudo green pseudo hardcore pseudo surf conglomerate billabong who is still going broke anyway. If they really gave a shit they would just shut their fucking doors and go home. Nothing wrong with capitalism but hypocrisy is disgraceful. There is nothing green about skating. Let's just be honest about it and go have fun.
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nike is a core skatebrand. they will still stay in the skateboardbusiness and keep making shoes when the scene gets as small as in the early 90ies. they're not doing it for the sake of money, it's all about their love for skateboarding.
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Ive had a fake account on slap for awhile now , handle : Organikarl . Sorry for the deception ...
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Ricky Oyola walked down his stairs and caught Donny Barley having his way with Ricky's leather couch.
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bobby puleo is actually animal chin.
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Skate Troll is actually Dennis Busenitz.
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Steve Rocco is set to get back into the industry by launching an exclusive Chinese skate team consortium ? la Blind/101/World Industries of the 90's. Skating is blowing up over there and his early business connections have secured him exclusivity rights to riders, spots and board technology. Once in place the company will weed out all other US or Euro skate companies getting manufactured over there. If they want to keep producing decks in the Far East they will have to join Steve's exclusive consortium. Girl and Chocolate are over there right now negotiating. Rick is trying to patch up old beef and everyone's using filming for the new video as an excuse. Eric Koston might not be included due to his ties to Steve Berra who tried a similar move when he took over operations at DC and tried to put a lock on Europe/Barcelona with the DC Embassy.
In 5 years time, the skate industry will be relocating to China leaving Deluxe and Alien Workshop to rep for the USA. Europe will carry on playing 2nd-3rd place.
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You should really get into creative writing. That was actually pretty convincing.
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Well, can't say no one warned us!
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J. Cass doesn't actually fit magnums
nor has he fucked a million bitches...
and rumor has it, he has a kid on the way
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Sorry to go off topic, but after reading that Merlino interview and watching that homie video part, I'm starting to like the dude. His skating is almost on a Sheckler level (minus tranny), and aside from annoying teammates (no diff to me) he doesn't seem like the asshole he's made out to be. I like Braydon, but he does suck compared to Nick.
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Nyjah smokes a lot of weed
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Sorry to go off topic, but after reading that Merlino interview and watching that homie video part, I'm starting to like the dude. His skating is almost on a Sheckler level (minus tranny), and aside from annoying teammates (no diff to me) he doesn't seem like the asshole he's made out to be. I like Braydon, but he does suck compared to Nick.
he seems nice enough. people get weird when they're drunk, that's all it is.
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it's no real secret but a lot of guys don't ride the product from the brands they're getting paychecks from. spraypainting and tearing logos off shoes and clothing is very common. and most people ride indys.
in interviews some pros who do drink and smoke say they don't because they don't want it to influence kids, but there are a few who actually do abstain.
louie barletta's exact age is a best kept secret
the current location of pappalardo's bag of tricks is also a secret now, even to anthony himself.
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Jake Phelps is straight edge, and infact just high off life.
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it's no real secret but a lot of guys don't ride the product from the brands they're getting paychecks from. spraypainting and tearing logos off shoes and clothing is very common. and most people ride indys.
in interviews some pros who do drink and smoke say they don't because they don't want it to influence kids, but there are a few who actually do abstain.
louie barletta's exact age is a best kept secret
the current location of pappalardo's bag of tricks is also a secret now, even to anthony himself.
hahahhahahaha
he went on a man hunt for his ollie, found it, and said fuck the rest
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it's no real secret but a lot of guys don't ride the product from the brands they're getting paychecks from. spraypainting and tearing logos off shoes and clothing is very common. and most people ride indys.
in interviews some pros who do drink and smoke say they don't because they don't want it to influence kids, but there are a few who actually do abstain.
louie barletta's exact age is a best kept secret
the current location of pappalardo's bag of tricks is also a secret now, even to anthony himself.
hahahhahahaha
he went on a man hunt for his ollie, found it, and said fuck the rest
YES!!
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Nyjah has a secret skate coach named Forrest Edwards.