Skating with agoraphobia

[lilac]

So, look, since I bailed out of finishing high school, I had refused to leave whatever domicile I occupied more than once every few months. Stayed with family, friends, significant others, whatever. Living with a best friend right now who gets it. But... I think skating is curing my hikikomori tendencies. I first started skating late, late at night in my apartment complex parking lot, then other empty parking lots at night, and I finally have started to practice during the day, too. I'm getting outside almost every single day for the first time in... like a decade. I don't feel as empty and unmotivated anymore, no longer spending all day sleeping or watching "video junk food" type content on YouTube. Going through a tough time for personal reasons right now too, as of super recent, and every time I get on my board, nothing else exists, I forget about the entire rest of the world, I stop thinking, it's just zen. Skateboarding probably saved my life.
I know this is a super corny post, but I guess I just wanted to share how much it means to me to be a part of a hobby and community that's made me a... slightly more functional person, and a far more happy and motivated person. I think my soul would've rotted away had it not been for starting skating. There's always something new to work towards, there's so many cool people in the community, and the dopamine rush of cleanly landing a trick, no matter how simple, helps me feel true accomplishment and joy that I never thought I'd feel again.
Thank you, to the skating community for being cool and welcoming as fuck, especially my first time visiting a skate shop, and thank you to skaters for their many online tutorials that helped me learn while still too anxious to go to a skate park and ask for help, and thank you to... anyone reading this long-ass sappy post, lol. Thanks, from the bottom of my heart. Hope this wasn't too terribly cringe.
 
On that note... any other hikikomori or ex-hikikomori skaters out there? Or skaters with agoraphobia?

[Eh]

This is sick as fuck.

[TheLurper]

Stoked on the Daria/Twin Peaks mashup there.

[lilac]

Stoked on the Daria/Twin Peaks mashup there.

Thanks, man! Favorite profile picture I've had in ages, honestly.

[Frank and Fred]

Not cringe or sappy at all @lilac Actually very rad to read. I'm stoked skateboarding is helping you seize life. Never heard of Hikikomori. Thanks for the education.

I'm not sure I'd describe myself as Full-Time Agoraphobic but I have had serious episodes throughout my life where I am almost incapacitated by the thought of social interaction. (Funny for a social worker... or maybe not...)  I never piled out on junk food or completely withdrew, by staying inside for long periods, as I have always craved the outdoors and physical movement. I have certainly had days where its a struggle and almost impossible to get out of the house. Generally speaking I'm doing way better with all this as a middle aged asshole and have pushed myself into new social territory... such as initiating conversation with strangers and its been hugely rewarding. Something I would never been able to do confidently do up until a few years ago.

To this day, I can't always skate with people. I'll be sessioning a spot and if people show up, I'll bail. I've been called out for this by well meaning people and we've been able to laugh it off, which was actually pretty healing.

What a journey we are all on...

[Mr. Kamikazi]

Admire your courage to speak about this. I urge you to continue to find ways to express the thoughts & feelings related to this. Keep a journal! More importantly, remember your victories.

I love your sig as I’m a huge Twin Peaks fan. Let me know if you want to get into a heavy discussion regarding all of the theories.


Stay well.

[Powdered Toast Man!]

one obscure quote by phelps i'll never forget reading from the last pages of the skateboarder magazine back in maybe 2007 is
"skateboarding is that thing people wish they had in their lives but they don't"
i posted this same quote on jake's passing thread,
which btw i got a feeling chico brenes saw here and posted the exact same words on his insta shortly after lol
(or not, i know both lived in SF etc.)

yea OP, you're not cringe
you vocalized the love i'm often too shy to express to the world myself

[Uncle Flea]

Yes Pal! Good stuff. Get some yo. A skater is definitely something to be.