man the original guy seems kinda whiny. if nobody is throwing you parties, then do more shit for people so they do more for you.
I don't even tell people it's my birthday, haven't for years. I have a lot of more acquaintances types, but few close friends, so I just get some calls and cards from the real close friends/fam, and everyone else doesn't even know. Not having facebook helps too prob.
My last one was a couple weeks ago. I took a bunch of xanax as a present to myself, smoked and saw "Star Wars" with some people who didn't even know it was my birthday. It was dope, playing the arcade games all blazed, and I won a duck for this girl I like. Maybe even better, last year's birthday was a bunch of vicodin and a replaying of "The Neverending Story" in theatres.
this dude should just make his own birthdays, and stop whining.
Sorry about your grandma, geek. I've dealt with family with terminal illnesses a few times, and it's a uniquely difficult situation.