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General Discussion => Classic SLAP => Topic started by: big sexy on August 22, 2006, 12:34:46 PM

Title: drugtests!
Post by: big sexy on August 22, 2006, 12:34:46 PM
i have to take a drug test today for my parents and i used to just bring other peoples pee with me but my dad could tell it wasnt room temp so now he stands in the room and watches me urinate which is humiliating. but im really scared im gonna fail for weed, coke, ecstasy, oxycotton, percocet, and ill have to go to rehab!! what do i do to pass?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: SLANGIN_ROCKS on August 22, 2006, 12:38:41 PM
drink a gallon of water and kill yourself
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: big sexy on August 22, 2006, 12:41:00 PM
but i dont no when the test is so idk when to drink the gallon...should i just drink gallon after gallon after gallon? but couldn't i die from that? what should i do? idk im so scared! but yea you should kill yourself
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: max power on August 22, 2006, 12:45:37 PM
i heard swallowing semen makes drug tests come out negative, so you should be fine.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 22, 2006, 12:48:38 PM
nah he definetely already tried that
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: SLANGIN_ROCKS on August 22, 2006, 12:57:51 PM
the only solution is suicide, or cutting your tiny cock off
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: E.l.G on August 22, 2006, 12:58:59 PM
Please nobody tell him how to beat it in case he is actually a real person.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Cliche Guevara on August 22, 2006, 01:42:39 PM
kill yourself
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: donnie_murdo on August 22, 2006, 01:52:32 PM
Please nobody tell him how to beat it in case he is actually a real person.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Hot Rod on August 22, 2006, 01:54:54 PM
i heard swallowing semen makes drug tests come out negative

no joke, my friend did this and passed his drug test even though he smoked the night before
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 22, 2006, 02:27:49 PM
yeah, you got to jerk off and jizz in a shot glass, or on your stomach or something, and eat all that shit anytime from right before your drug test to 12 hours before.  pretty gross, but it works.  good luck.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 22, 2006, 02:30:07 PM
yeah, you got to jerk off and jizz in a shot glass, or on your stomach or something, and eat all that shit anytime from right before your drug test to 12 hours before.  pretty gross, but it works.  good luck.

exactly what I was going to say. its nasty but it works every single time.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: SLANGIN_ROCKS on August 22, 2006, 02:40:33 PM
fuck! you guys weren't supposed to tell him!
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 22, 2006, 02:42:37 PM
fuck! you guys weren't supposed to tell him!

nah I mean Ive had to go through the same shit
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: remEMBer on August 22, 2006, 02:50:32 PM
I'll sell you some hot urine, but promise me you won't shower with it after.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Duffy on August 22, 2006, 03:10:55 PM
Someone should smoke and then sell him piss...
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 22, 2006, 03:12:17 PM
Someone should smoke and then sell him piss...

what good would that do?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Duffy on August 22, 2006, 03:13:06 PM
Money for piss that'd still get him in trouble.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: roulette on August 22, 2006, 03:37:23 PM
hopefully he gets grounded from the internet
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 22, 2006, 03:42:35 PM
hopefully he gets grounded from the internet

hopefully you stop posting around the same time so the forums will be twice as much better
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: roulette on August 22, 2006, 07:14:52 PM
Expand Quote
hopefully he gets grounded from the internet
[close]

hopefully you stop posting around the same time so the forums will be twice as much better
what? moody mizzark
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 22, 2006, 07:16:36 PM
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
hopefully he gets grounded from the internet
[close]

hopefully you stop posting around the same time so the forums will be twice as much better
[close]
what? moody mizzark

MOODY? WHEN HAVE I EVER LIKED YOU?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: yeahocean on August 22, 2006, 11:22:30 PM
Vinegar.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: big sexy on August 23, 2006, 08:26:01 AM
ok so i tried it and took a shot of it. i hope it works im countin on it. kinda tastes weird tho. im gonna do it every 2 hours til i get tested. then i will pass and i can still come on here and talk shyt to u assholes. thanks for ur help losers
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 23, 2006, 09:29:28 AM
you took a shot of your own load? fag
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: deluxe_six on August 23, 2006, 09:48:59 AM
you gotta do what you gotta do...
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: cold budweisers on August 23, 2006, 09:53:30 AM
jeah, sip the jizz if you really want to pass that drug test
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 23, 2006, 10:33:58 AM
so does that shit really work or are you trying to get big sexy to drink his own semen?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 23, 2006, 10:36:54 AM
so does that shit really work or are you trying to get big sexy to drink his own semen?

no it really works
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: max power on August 23, 2006, 10:37:44 AM
so does that shit really work or are you trying to get big sexy to drink his own semen?
it works, i know a bunch of people that did it. there's something about the proteins in it that neutralize the thc in your system.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 23, 2006, 10:46:10 AM
whaaaat that shit works? i thought for sure that you were just trying to get big sexy (RIP) to drink his own semen. ive been failing drug tests for the last 2 years and all along i could have been drinking my own jizz hahah. idk if i could do it though. you have to be pretty strong stomached. so all it is is 1 shot of it? and how long after does it take for your urine to be clean?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ween on August 23, 2006, 10:49:53 AM
it works overnight. its has to do with gentic makeup. The body recognizes if its your own or not. it's a fact, it's science.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 23, 2006, 10:58:59 AM
it works overnight. its has to do with gentic makeup. The body recognizes if its your own or not. it's a fact, it's science.

no thats just stupid, it can be any semen at all
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 23, 2006, 10:59:56 AM
you are just saying that as an excuse to drink other peoples semen
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ween on August 23, 2006, 11:01:36 AM
I've posted on many message boards over the years, and seen many really stupid discussions, but if this turns into an argument over who knows more about cum drinking, I'm throwing my computer into the river
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 23, 2006, 11:02:50 AM
mizzark would definetely beat you in that argument. dude knows more about cum drinking than lance bass!
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 23, 2006, 11:43:56 AM
whaaaat that shit works? i thought for sure that you were just trying to get big sexy (RIP) to drink his own semen. ive been failing drug tests for the last 2 years and all along i could have been drinking my own jizz hahah. idk if i could do it though. you have to be pretty strong stomached. so all it is is 1 shot of it? and how long after does it take for your urine to be clean?

i have already answered all those questions
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: 1992 on August 23, 2006, 12:45:07 PM
hahaha....what the fuck is this?

haha...sorry John C....but was your quote being serious?....God I hope not......if it was...someone needs to smack you.

Jesus Christ.....just drink lots of Cranberry Juice and take a shot of vinegar....it takes about 3 weeks for thc to run out of your system but you can mask it.....oxys,yayo and most other pills and shit take about 48 hours to get out of the system....alcohol is 12 hours...the best way not to worry about passing is not doing anything at all....I had to take drug and alcohol classes for 6 months because of a DWI....God....I will never do that again.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: max power on August 23, 2006, 12:47:08 PM
hahaha....what the fuck is this?

haha...sorry John C....but was your quote being serious?....God I hope not......if it was...someone needs to smack you.

Jesus Christ.....just drink lots of Cranberry Juice and take a shot of vinegar....it takes about 3 weeks for thc to run out of your system but you can mask it.....oxys,yayo and most other pills and shit take about 48 hours to get out of the system....alcohol is 12 hours...the best way not to worry about passing is not doing anything at all....I had to take drug and alcohol classes for 6 months because of a DWI....God....I will never do that again.
mods delete this post, he's a fascist who doesn't want people to know the truth
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: isaac on August 23, 2006, 01:27:02 PM
what truth is that?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: max power on August 23, 2006, 01:28:51 PM
the true way to beat the system.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Chris from Essex on August 23, 2006, 01:52:22 PM
For Christ's sake, you're on the bloody internet - look for sites with advice/hints/tips/ on how to pass a drugs test.

Here's a few things I found anyway:

    * Drink lots of water -- at least two quarts a day several days before you wish all traces to be eliminated. Water is a natural cleanser and assists the body in the detoxification process.
    * If you are giving a Urine Sample, use the third or later urine of the day and "catch" your sample in midstream -- not the first drops that come out.
    * Excercise and dry sauna heat will help remove the THC for puposes of Detoxing. Do this in combination with heavy water intake.
    * Stop exercising at least two days before your test because exercise increases the amount of THC in your urine. Since THC is fat-soluble and is stored in fat cells, exercise will help burn the fat cells thus releasing more THC into your urine sample.
    * You should avoid all toxins and unnecessary medications for 48-72 hours before you are testing or need trace elimination to occure.
   
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: cold budweisers on August 23, 2006, 03:19:51 PM
or just avoid all that shit and down a few shots of jizz and you'll be in the clear.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 23, 2006, 03:23:48 PM
or just avoid all that shit and down a few shots of jizz and you'll be in the clear.

Agreed,. 
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 23, 2006, 03:39:07 PM
haha...sorry John C....but was your quote being serious?....God I hope not......if it was...someone needs to smack you.

what quote are you referring to? ive passed many with just drinking mad water but i don't always know when they are coming. it sucks. i would only drink my own semen to pass a drug test if it was the deciding factor of going to rehab or not. and thats not a worry.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: 1992 on August 23, 2006, 04:01:09 PM
whaaaat that shit works? i thought for sure that you were just trying to get big sexy (RIP) to drink his own semen. ive been failing drug tests for the last 2 years and all along i could have been drinking my own jizz hahah. idk if i could do it though. you have to be pretty strong stomached. so all it is is 1 shot of it? and how long after does it take for your urine to be clean?

This one right here.

Dude,everyone was just fucking around with the "semen" tactic....I hope you actually don't believe that it works...I would feel really,really bad for the next person you decided to share a soda with...oh man.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: E.l.G on August 23, 2006, 04:21:11 PM
What are you talking about? Drinking your own semen is a foolproof method for eliminating THC in your system and that's a fact!
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: 1992 on August 23, 2006, 04:24:02 PM
haha....well,I guess he could get used to it in case he ever ends up in jail.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: E.l.G on August 23, 2006, 04:28:03 PM
I can personally vouch for the effectiveness of this method.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: fuckingvegan on August 23, 2006, 04:42:32 PM
wouldn't a lot of girls not test positive for THC if all they had to do was drink cum?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 23, 2006, 04:44:35 PM
wouldn't a lot of girls not test positive for THC if all they had to do was drink cum?

isn't the fact that you're halfway beleiving this not surprising at all
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: fuckingvegan on August 23, 2006, 04:45:14 PM
Expand Quote
wouldn't a lot of girls not test positive for THC if all they had to do was drink cum?
[close]

isn't the fact that you're halfway beleiving this not surprising at all

No I am pointing how dumb you people are.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: woody on August 23, 2006, 04:47:34 PM
The need to test this method on 'Mythbusters' the TV show
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: fuckingvegan on August 23, 2006, 04:49:45 PM
The need to test this method on 'Mythbusters' the TV show

Did you see the one that proved eating a poppy seed bagel could alter a drug test and cause a failure?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: viperXL on August 23, 2006, 04:55:15 PM
I heard drinking loads of water with baking soda clouds up the thc in your urine.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Mizzark on August 23, 2006, 04:55:21 PM
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
wouldn't a lot of girls not test positive for THC if all they had to do was drink cum?
[close]

isn't the fact that you're halfway beleiving this not surprising at all
[close]

No I am pointing how dumb you people are.

who's dumb? this was clearly all a joke, you're just too slow witted to realize it.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: dalycitymassive on August 23, 2006, 05:12:40 PM
i wonder how many people drank their cum
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: max power on August 23, 2006, 05:26:06 PM
if even one person did, then my job here is done.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: uruguay on August 23, 2006, 05:47:27 PM
johnc was close enough to warrant celebration. 
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: fuckingvegan on August 23, 2006, 06:59:11 PM
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
wouldn't a lot of girls not test positive for THC if all they had to do was drink cum?
[close]

isn't the fact that you're halfway beleiving this not surprising at all
[close]

No I am pointing how dumb you people are.
[close]

who's dumb? this was clearly all a joke, you're just too slow witted to realize it.

You are just getting dumber.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: woody on August 23, 2006, 07:26:36 PM
Quote
Did you see the one that proved eating a poppy seed bagel could alter a drug test and cause a failure?
Ive only really seen the show once, I don't get cable or even watch tv much. But I'm not too surprised about the poppy seed thing.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: damian on August 23, 2006, 07:50:02 PM
in some cultures, not drinking semen is frowned upon.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: overdoso on August 24, 2006, 04:50:49 AM
damn
i'll never be able to take JohnC serious again
i always liked his posts

by the way
can your parents make you do a drug test in the states? how does that work? it sounds ridiculous
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 06:28:27 AM
johnc was close enough to warrant celebration. 

yea i had the glass up to my lips but luckily i logged onto slap first.


damn
i'll never be able to take JohnC serious again
i always liked his posts

by the way
can your parents make you do a drug test in the states? how does that work? it sounds ridiculous


as you can see i clearly never stated i was going to do it. i was asking about it cuz it sounded ridiculous.

yes your parents can make you take a drug test as long as you are under 18. i turn 18 in a month. but i will still be living with my parents so they could just say "you have to take drug tests in order to live here"
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 06:29:31 AM
Expand Quote
haha...sorry John C....but was your quote being serious?....God I hope not......if it was...someone needs to smack you.
[close]
i would only drink my own semen to pass a drug test if it was the deciding factor of going to rehab or not. and thats not a worry.


johnc was close enough to warrant celebration.


doesn't look like it.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 06:33:01 AM
yeah right, you made a fool of yourself and now you have to live down the aftermath of being such an idiot

HAHAHAHA!!!  (covers mouth and points finger)
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 06:36:43 AM
that really hurts. especially from somebody whos opinion means so much to me. look at all my posts, did i once say i wanted to or was goin to try it? go play some internet poker and waste your life away cuz you can't skate now that you have a bum knee and a R.I.P. courthouse. sucks to be you.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 06:40:34 AM
that really hurts. especially from somebody whos opinion means so much to me. look at all my posts, did i once say i wanted to or was goin to try it? go play some internet poker and waste your life away cuz you can't skate now that you have a bum knee and a R.I.P. courthouse. sucks to be you.

yeah you did say that you wanted to do it (if it helped you pass a drug test), and you implied that you would do it.  you can go back a couple pages or just look at my new signature. 

"waste my life away" playing internet poker?  i suppose if i was a donkey who lost all my money all the time like you, then i would be wasting my life away.  i'd rather sit and play cards on my own time than work in some shitty ass bank as a summer job making jack shit per hour, living with my fucking parents in shitty ass NEW JERSEY. 

once again, my knee is fucked up but i can still skate.  hell, i can probably still skate better with this fucked knee than you can on your best day, so whose life really sucks? 

let's see-

-i make more money than you
-i have a better job than you
-i don't have to worry about drug tests
-i probably skate better than you when i'm hurt
-i probably get more bitches than you do
-i get better chronic than you do
-i am older and wiser than you

THE LIST GOES ON

yeah my life really sucks compared to yours
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 06:50:18 AM
haha in that signature i am clearly joking hence the "hahah" after i said "all along i could have been doing this." never did i say or indicate that i was going to do it. so have fun with that new signature which means nothing.

and yea you are wasting your life away. you got no job kid. i got a job at 17 that many people keep for a career. remember i got all that shit like "17 year olds can't work in banks" well that was because its a good job that someone doesn't normally have at my age. and i guarantee when i am your age i will be making shitloads more than you do with your online poker games. and what kind of an insult is "donkey?" just say jackass you fucking kook. you make yourself look dumb every time you use that one "homeboy."

your knee is fucked up and i will outskate you any time. and if it were not fucked up i would outskate you anytime. so i would have to answer your question with "you, your life really sucks"
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 07:00:23 AM
"clearly joking" about drinking jizz?  ok, we'll leave that one up to the masses.

i hate to burst your bubble buddy, but being a WINDOW TELLER is not exactly a "career" that people plan to get into.  it's not even that great of a job!  but you're probably real stoked to be making 9-12 dollars an hour, it's a real step up from mowing lawns and washing cars for 10 bucks, isn't it? 

what's wrong donkey, you don't like the word "donkey"?  it's what you are man.  especially if you ever come sit at my table.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 07:00:50 AM
you could work all week for your paycheck, and i'll clean you out in no more than 3 hours at a card table. 

so who's the sucker with the shitty job? 

donkey.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 07:09:03 AM
but back to the subject, you are a gullible scrub.  if we had kept the joke going and your parents told you that they were springing a drug test on you later today, you would drink the hell out of your own jizz, and no matter how much you lie about it, everybody who comes in here and reads this shit knows it.  i mean, you might as well just drop it now and hope that everybody forgets in time...but i doubt it...
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 07:29:20 AM
maybe you are too busy cleaning house at the poker table but if you checked a few posts up you would see a post clearly stating i would not do it unless it was over 30 days of rehab or not. i have failed them before and the worst thing that happens is like i get dessert taken away for a week.

but you started with donkey and now its "scrub?" turn the TLC record off and stick to your card game.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 07:35:12 AM


-i make more money than you
-i have a better job than you
-i don't have to worry about drug tests
-i probably skate better than you when i'm hurt
-i probably get more bitches than you do
-i get better chronic than you do
-i am older and wiser than you

THE LIST GOES ON

yeah my life really sucks compared to yours


-no way you get more bitches than me
-no way you get better nuggets than me
-no way you skate better than me
-i will make more money than you do when i am 23
-i leave for college in a week so i will no longer have to worry about drug tests



but i love how you go back and edit your posts to make your shit look better
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 07:36:08 AM
oooh, he's hitting the brakes.  funny you talk about "turning off the tlc record".  let me direct the audience's attention to this, in the "music you're embarassed to like" topic-

a lot of new rap shit like yung joc. vanessa carlton. "no scrubs" by tlc. idk what else.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 07:38:19 AM
Expand Quote


-i make more money than you
-i have a better job than you
-i don't have to worry about drug tests
-i probably skate better than you when i'm hurt
-i probably get more bitches than you do
-i get better chronic than you do
-i am older and wiser than you

THE LIST GOES ON

yeah my life really sucks compared to yours
[close]


but i love how you go back and edit your posts to make your shit look better

umm, i havent edited anything.  sometimes a thought will pop into my head right as i post, and i will either make another post, or go back in and add it within 20 seconds.  i generally just make a new one. 
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 07:39:36 AM
i'm 17 years old. you are trying to tell me i don't have a good job for my age. thats a joke. you play cards for your money. that won't last very long. i will shit all over your little card games when i am 23. i will have so much more money than you and thats a guarantee.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 07:41:02 AM
pffff, go drink some jizz before your dreams of getting rich are shattered by a random drug test from your parents
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 07:41:39 AM
oooh, he's hitting the brakes.  funny you talk about "turning off the tlc record".  let me direct the audience's attention to this, in the "music you're embarassed to like" topic-

Expand Quote
a lot of new rap shit like yung joc. vanessa carlton. "no scrubs" by tlc. idk what else.
[close]

well yea...whats your point. i like the song. and apparently you do too. i knew you would pull this card as soon as i posted it. but you have no point. i never said i didn't like it. and me enjoying the song probably stems from the fact my friend plays it on guitar and its fucking hillarious.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 07:42:21 AM
pffff, go drink some jizz before your dreams of getting rich are shattered by a random drug test from your parents

this makes sense?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 07:42:35 AM
"IF ONLY THEY HAD A MARATHON FOR BACKPEDDLING"
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 07:44:45 AM
Expand Quote
oooh, he's hitting the brakes.  funny you talk about "turning off the tlc record".  let me direct the audience's attention to this, in the "music you're embarassed to like" topic-

Expand Quote
a lot of new rap shit like yung joc. vanessa carlton. "no scrubs" by tlc. idk what else.
[close]
[close]

well yea...whats your point. i like the song. and apparently you do too. i knew you would pull this card as soon as i posted it. but you have no point. i never said i didn't like it. and me enjoying the song probably stems from the fact my friend plays it on guitar and its fucking hillarious.


you know what the point is!! 

you enjoying the song probably stems from the fact that you're a fucking loser, actually wait, sorry, donkey
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 07:55:54 AM
my bad i forgot you are too much of an internet tough guy to admit you like anything but straight up gangsta rap.


and by the way i guarantee i make more "outside" of my job then you do with your small time poker shit.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 24, 2006, 08:32:49 AM
anyone here ever taste it though?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: rhp on August 24, 2006, 08:48:27 AM
flamewar of the month award
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 24, 2006, 08:58:13 AM
you just said flamewar. so i guess you are the winner now.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 10:40:18 AM
my bad i forgot you are too much of an internet tough guy to admit you like anything but straight up gangsta rap.


and by the way i guarantee i make more "outside" of my job then you do with your small time poker shit.

believe what you want to believe, just like how you believed that drinking cum makes you pass a drug test. 
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 24, 2006, 10:46:29 AM
Expand Quote
my bad i forgot you are too much of an internet tough guy to admit you like anything but straight up gangsta rap.


and by the way i guarantee i make more "outside" of my job then you do with your small time poker shit.
[close]

believe what you want to believe, just like how you believed that drinking cum makes you pass a drug test. 

alright cool well at least now you are admitting i wasn't about to drink some. i'm done here. continue to talk shit.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 11:05:29 AM
when did i "admit" that you weren't about to drink some? 
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 24, 2006, 11:12:12 AM
i'm done here.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: SLANGIN_ROCKS on August 24, 2006, 11:30:50 AM
wow
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 24, 2006, 11:31:19 AM
when did i "admit" that you weren't about to drink some? 

i completely admit that you were not in fact going to drink semen to pass the drug test. i have done this before and it does not work. but i still continue to drink it when it comes out of mizzarks shriveled penis.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: SLANGIN_ROCKS on August 24, 2006, 11:32:04 AM
denotape GET OUT
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 24, 2006, 11:32:32 AM
i didn't know i was inside
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 24, 2006, 11:32:50 AM
wow

what are you wowing about
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: SLANGIN_ROCKS on August 24, 2006, 11:37:29 AM
kill yourself and i'll tell you
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 24, 2006, 11:52:11 AM
how could you tell me if i was dead? huh? huh?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: damian on August 24, 2006, 12:56:42 PM
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my bad i forgot you are too much of an internet tough guy to admit you like anything but straight up gangsta rap.


and by the way i guarantee i make more "outside" of my job then you do with your small time poker shit.
[close]

believe what you want to believe, just like how you believed that drinking cum makes you pass a drug test. 
[close]

alright cool well at least now you are admitting i wasn't about to drink some. i'm done here. continue to talk shit.

that's hilarious you'd even dare shine a light toward drinking your own semen to avoid drug assessments. i shutter to think of what kind of self discovery you do when your parents are away.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: damian on August 24, 2006, 01:14:43 PM
(http://www.worldfacials.com/pics/freetour/big3_1.jpg)

someone's about to pass their test!
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 24, 2006, 02:04:36 PM
AHAHAHHAHAHA, THATS SOME FUNNY SHIT
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: remEMBer on August 24, 2006, 04:54:35 PM
whoa she looks real happy to be holding a plate full of jizz!
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 25, 2006, 08:19:08 AM
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my bad i forgot you are too much of an internet tough guy to admit you like anything but straight up gangsta rap.


and by the way i guarantee i make more "outside" of my job then you do with your small time poker shit.
[close]

believe what you want to believe, just like how you believed that drinking cum makes you pass a drug test. 
[close]

alright cool well at least now you are admitting i wasn't about to drink some. i'm done here. continue to talk shit.
[close]

that's hilarious you'd even dare shine a light toward drinking your own semen to avoid drug assessments. i shutter to think of what kind of self discovery you do when your parents are away.

when did i "shine a light" toward it? yea i believed it which is retarded. all i did was inquire about it cuz i was wondering how the fuck it worked since it don't make much sense. and all you immature little assholes are like ahhahahahaha he was gonna drink cum thats so funny
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: damian on August 25, 2006, 11:20:39 AM
denial just isn't a river in egypt.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 25, 2006, 11:30:13 AM
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my bad i forgot you are too much of an internet tough guy to admit you like anything but straight up gangsta rap.


and by the way i guarantee i make more "outside" of my job then you do with your small time poker shit.
[close]

believe what you want to believe, just like how you believed that drinking cum makes you pass a drug test. 
[close]

alright cool well at least now you are admitting i wasn't about to drink some. i'm done here. continue to talk shit.
[close]

that's hilarious you'd even dare shine a light toward drinking your own semen to avoid drug assessments. i shutter to think of what kind of self discovery you do when your parents are away.
[close]

when did i "shine a light" toward it? yea i believed it which is retarded. all i did was inquire about it cuz i was wondering how the fuck it worked since it don't make much sense. and all you immature little assholes are like ahhahahahaha he was gonna drink cum thats so funny

is the C in your moniker short for semen?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 25, 2006, 12:02:55 PM
yes it is big sexy how did you guess?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 25, 2006, 02:23:27 PM
man this has been hilarious.  thanks for being such a deuchbag john
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: JohnC on August 25, 2006, 02:41:57 PM
you would think such an intelligent card player at the age of 23 would at least know how to spell douchebag.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: damian on August 25, 2006, 02:51:05 PM
alright, man milk contemplator.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DENTOTAPE on August 25, 2006, 03:00:15 PM
if drinking your cum is cool, consider ymhy miles davis
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: kronichles on August 25, 2006, 10:33:28 PM
im gonna fail for  ecstasy, oxycotton, ill have to go to rehab!!


that oxyCOTTON must gotcha down son, you must be some real addict...oxycontin dipshit.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 26, 2006, 12:37:41 PM
you would think such an intelligent card player at the age of 23 would at least know how to spell douchebag.

this topic is going down in infamy
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: God on August 26, 2006, 12:39:44 PM
LOLOLOLOL
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: damian on August 26, 2006, 01:25:44 PM
whoa she looks real happy to be holding a plate full of jizz!

well, she is asian.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Pontoon_Boat on August 26, 2006, 01:26:22 PM
*floats by thread*

*feels like sinking*
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: megan on August 26, 2006, 04:20:01 PM
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im gonna fail for  ecstasy, oxycotton, ill have to go to rehab!!
[close]


that oxyCOTTON must gotcha down son, you must be some real addict...oxycontin dipshit.

ok i read 8 pages of cum drinking chat waiting for someone to point that out! that shit's hilarious. oxycottontail rabbit
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: SLANGIN_ROCKS on August 26, 2006, 07:18:00 PM
LO FUCKINGMEGAN
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ymhy on August 27, 2006, 09:28:52 AM
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im gonna fail for  ecstasy, oxycotton, ill have to go to rehab!!
[close]


that oxyCOTTON must gotcha down son, you must be some real addict...oxycontin dipshit.
[close]

ok i read 8 pages of cum drinking chat waiting for someone to point that out! that shit's hilarious. oxycottontail rabbit

you read 8 pages of cum drinking chat and all you could think about was when somebody was going to point out a stupid grammatical error?  that's ridiculous.

YOUR PRIORITIES ARE JACKED, STOP POSTING

OOOHH, I CAN SEE A DRUG TEST LOOMING IN YOUR FUTURE MEGAN, YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO...
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Lakai or die on August 27, 2006, 04:45:37 PM
*floats by thread*

*feels like sinking*

LMAO God this Pontoon character is a hoot.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Duffy on August 27, 2006, 07:50:53 PM
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*floats by thread*

*feels like sinking*
[close]

LMAO God this Pontoon character is a hoot.

Duhhhhh
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Ronald Wilson Reagan on August 27, 2006, 09:25:05 PM
Poor pontoon boat, its upset.
JohnC, you made it seem like next time you were facing a drug test you were ready to sip down some of your own semen
EIG, you claimed to drink your own semen just to keep the joke going
YMHY and JohnC, good job on the multiple page bitch fest
BIGSEXY, if you are a kid who still lives with his parents and is going to turn up positive for all those drugs, maybe rehab might be just what the doctor ordered
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: E.l.G on August 28, 2006, 01:32:51 AM
EIG, you claimed to drink your own semen just to keep the joke going

No shame.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Joey on May 04, 2007, 10:25:21 AM
Drugs are whack.
stick to skateboarding. 
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: vitunvesa on May 06, 2007, 03:40:36 PM
I read this whole shit 'cause it was in the Classics

it was pretty funny though!

I gotta take drugtest at my job so now I know a good way to pass it hahah!
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: i dunno on May 08, 2007, 01:58:56 PM
just fucking drink as much water as you can without exploding and then piss your brains out
and then do a couple shots of vinegar
i passed a drug test 5 hours after smoking one time doing that
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Joey on May 10, 2007, 07:41:50 AM
just fucking drink as much water as you can without exploding and then piss your brains out
and then do a couple shots of vinegar
i passed a drug test 5 hours after smoking one time doing that
pure luck.
i saw a movie where this dude like injected his penis with fake pee with a tukey baster.  That could always work?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: matt/tx on May 14, 2007, 08:48:16 PM
haha i saw tht shit, prolly hurt like shit but if u pass u pass
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: big sexy on May 16, 2007, 02:25:34 PM
sup guys its the one and only big sexy back up in this biatch. just got outta rehab but you know im still blowin dro homies. i finally failed one but oh well i have a fake penis i wear to pass them now. its call the original wizinator ever herd of it?
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: cad302 on May 19, 2007, 07:21:27 PM
big sexy, did you actually drink your jizz? after reading the first few pages of this i was considering it. I geuss if you did it didnt work out though
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: picklesickshuv-it on July 15, 2007, 08:09:31 PM
sup guys its the one and only big sexy back up in this biatch. just got outta rehab but you know im still blowin dro homies. i finally failed one but oh well i have a fake penis i wear to pass them now. its call the original wizinator ever herd of it?

cant fake that shit.  i love blowin dro
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: SevenSkateboards on August 19, 2007, 03:10:14 AM
You've got shíttty parents... but then again, if they stop you taking drugs its a good thing......

Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: matt/tx on November 03, 2007, 10:24:09 PM
yea u could just not do drugs
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Chris from Essex on November 18, 2007, 06:19:34 AM
..
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: max power on November 23, 2007, 07:12:51 PM
*bump*
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: toque on November 23, 2007, 07:51:33 PM
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sup guys its the one and only big sexy back up in this biatch. just got outta rehab but you know im still blowin dro homies. i finally failed one but oh well i have a fake penis i wear to pass them now. its call the original wizinator ever herd of it?
[close]

cant fake that shit.  i love blowin dro


it seems like if i had to go to rehab and had all that stuff bearing down on me,  blowin dro would make me feel really bad and paranoid.......but i guess its just different for different poeple...
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Falco on December 07, 2007, 09:49:30 AM
Mutter der Mann mit de Koks ist da.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: skatebored on January 08, 2008, 04:49:57 PM
The other day some hippy/headshop/stoner catalog came in the mail to the shop, i guess they think skateboarders and stoners go hand in hand? anyways....i was flipping through it and there was some fake penis thing called the "Wizzinator 5000", which is no more than a fake penis. You pee into a little container inside the fake dick and it keeps it at the right temperature and then you wear it over your real dick I guess? anyways, it seems like some stoners got smart. maybe you guys should check that thing out
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: somekid on January 08, 2008, 11:36:29 PM
i thought that this had been settled.
just drink your own jizz.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: mbl88 on January 10, 2008, 02:49:14 AM
you only do that when necessary
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: brent on April 26, 2008, 03:30:15 PM
my step brother puts gelatin in a glass of water and i guess that works.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: paulo from vicwest on May 22, 2008, 11:38:56 AM
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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kill yourself
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Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: ThatOneDude on July 23, 2008, 09:55:04 PM
hey, if you have me pee for you, I guess you'll only get busted for weed and ecstasy.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: gnartastic on July 24, 2008, 02:03:32 PM
Drugs are whack.
stick to skateboarding. 
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: robordie on September 17, 2008, 10:40:49 PM
i smoked weed for like 4 years everyday and found out i had to get a drug test for a job.
i smoked before the interview at like 10am and found out then i needed a to take drug test at 9am
the next day. i drank 2 gallons of water. after the first gallon i felt sick but just kept drinking nonstop.
i puked out a bunch of water and actually shit out water. i drank 2 monsters and probably another half
gallon of water in the morning and passed the test. if youre fat youre fucked though. the thc stays in
your fat cells i know a fat dude that didnt smoke for 8 months and failed.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: vince the stud on October 22, 2008, 04:12:04 AM
piss in the dam thing and go to reab
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: paraquat on November 21, 2008, 03:24:09 PM
3 days, no flush niacin, and water lots of water.

I heard pickle juice works
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: City of Drunken Totems on November 24, 2008, 02:51:19 AM
3 days, no flush niacin, and water lots of water.

I heard pickle juice works
fuck id rather go to rehab then drink pickly juice BLEH
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Sleazy on November 24, 2008, 04:14:04 AM
come on guys, it's not that complicated

you can drink a gallon of water right before and you will basically piss water. this will work but you can get called on a retest for having "diluted urin" so definitely tell them that your on a workout program that requires a gallon a day if you do this.


the safest route is the wizinator. you can get the cheaper version without the dick for 60 bucks and it will work for 2 tests if you do it right. the dick version is about 160 but you can refill it so it's got it's perks. for corporate drug tests (for a corporate job) you only need the cheap one, for the state you'll have to go with the full kit and i'm not sure about blue collar.


i've done both ways and they both work. i have a friend that was on parole for a few years and did the gallon of water thing the whole time and it worked for him but i personally rather pay the money and not have to deal with any stress using the wizinator.

oh and if you use the wizinator, practice with the clamp first, it can make a loud noise unless you do it right, so get your technique on lock before you go piss. and if your company does randoms, then just keep one in your car.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: popeyesfriedchicken on June 20, 2009, 10:16:05 PM
there are only two ways to pass a piss test if you've been doing something.  the first, is the wide variety of detox drinks.  ready clean is only 20 bucks and will work if you haven't done anything in 48 hours.  xxtra clean will work if you did something the night before and is 40 bucks.  i've tried both of these and they have ALWAYS worked.  and then there is the wizzinator, aka fake dick.  expensive but works.  everything else is way too risky and stressful.  that's all you need to know. 
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: A Rolled Ankle on June 20, 2009, 10:21:17 PM
just eat gobs of mayonnaise if you really want to pass
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: iwishilivedinallentown on June 21, 2009, 09:26:32 PM
it's pretty obvious that the kid who asked the question that started this thread got busted and went to rehab.
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: DevilOnEnzyte on June 22, 2009, 01:19:14 PM
"Hey bartender, JIZZ BOMB over here"!
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: Do You Feel Lucky? on June 22, 2009, 02:42:55 PM
haha...I remember this thread from back in the day....
Title: Re: drugtests!
Post by: 13callsBS on June 27, 2009, 05:37:55 PM
The Gov. is trying to outlaw the Whizzinator!