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General Discussion => WHATEVER => Topic started by: rubberpumpthecloth on May 09, 2011, 07:52:33 AM

Title: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: rubberpumpthecloth on May 09, 2011, 07:52:33 AM
Other than human bodies, what kinds of objects have you fucked? Condoms, pies, fish, melons, cups, plastic bags, this, that, heard what?
 
No jokes please guys...
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Perro Mojado on May 09, 2011, 08:05:43 AM
when younger i fucked raw meat
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: nice weather on May 09, 2011, 08:24:18 AM
Put food on my bright red teenage boner while watching stargate SG1 to see what the warmth of a woman would feel like. Turns out it was the exact same feeling.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Beeda Weeda on May 09, 2011, 09:32:15 AM
put my dick in a hot dog bun and got a blow job from a fat chick.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Alan on May 09, 2011, 10:00:00 AM
Paging Eric Logan!
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Narcissus on May 09, 2011, 12:10:02 PM
when younger i fucked raw meat

Dorothy Mantooth is a saint!
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Hercules Rockefeller on May 09, 2011, 12:55:26 PM
put my dick in a hot dog bun and got a blow job from a fat chick.

thats a dangerous game you?re playing there.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: The Twilight Zone on May 09, 2011, 01:20:00 PM
>be 12
>horny as all hell
>always looking for something to hump
>found it.
>big juicy fish my dad caught
>if i close my eyes i know it will feel great
>steal the fish in the middle of the night
>tip toe back to my room
>open through the door
>get on the floor
>everybody walk the dinosaur




























(http://i274.photobucket.com/albums/jj254/savannah_lare/dinosaur-1.gif)
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: H8R part 4 on May 10, 2011, 07:08:09 AM
i busted on nut on my friends sister pillow.  i was just marking my territory.

Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: sparksandblood on May 10, 2011, 07:30:01 AM
Paging Eric Logan!
COUCH FUCKER
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Beeda Weeda on May 10, 2011, 07:51:53 AM
i jacked off with vicks vapo rub as lube.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Kab on May 10, 2011, 01:07:32 PM
i jacked off with vicks vapo rub as lube.

Hmm that didn't start to burn after a while?

I wouldn't consider this sexual, but once I sprayed AXE on my balls when I was in middle school - big fucking mistake.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: loose girlfriends on May 10, 2011, 08:51:08 PM
I fuck dolphins.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: swllbo on May 10, 2011, 10:35:05 PM
Expand Quote
i jacked off with vicks vapo rub as lube.
[close]

Hmm that didn't start to burn after a while?

I wouldn't consider this sexual, but once I sprayed AXE on my balls when I was in middle school - big fucking mistake.
I had a friend who accidently used some sort of exfoliation cream as lube. Watching him run through the house with his road rash dick while screaming " My dick is on fire " was hilarious.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: StabMasterArson on May 10, 2011, 11:19:40 PM
A few years back, a friend of mine bought me some sort of cheap "pocket pussy" back from Europe. I think he got it in one of those machines by the mens room. All it really was was a bag you filled up with warm water and lubed up the tight hole in the front. Drunk and lonely on a new years, I came home from striking out and gave it a shot. Filled it up with not too hot of water, but not too cold. I shot for body temp. Put on a pretty good adult film and went to fucking town on the thing. It broke, I dropped it on the ground, soaked my floor and almost fried my computer. Still boned up, I finished the old fashion way, this time, with wet socks.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: friendly dave on May 11, 2011, 12:57:31 AM
One time I was fooling around with this girl in a stairwell, dododo, I beat off on a church.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: CUDDLEMONSTER on May 11, 2011, 01:01:09 AM
i beat off to flintstones porn this morning.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: the ragamuffin on May 11, 2011, 05:53:21 AM
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
i jacked off with vicks vapo rub as lube.
[close]

Hmm that didn't start to burn after a while?

I wouldn't consider this sexual, but once I sprayed AXE on my balls when I was in middle school - big fucking mistake.
[close]
I had a friend who accidently used some sort of exfoliation cream as lube. Watching him run through the house with his road rash dick while screaming " My dick is on fire " was hilarious.

Once I convinced my brother that putting icy hot cream on your balls was the best feeling a man could have so he tried it. Hilarity ensued.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: barkeep11 on May 11, 2011, 01:24:06 PM
Mom's comfy couch.  I went by there years later and stuck my finger between the cushions... it was still a little crispy.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: FandomCereal on September 22, 2023, 10:06:11 AM
this is the worst thread i've ever seen in my life
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: double fakie ollie grind on September 22, 2023, 12:12:04 PM
this is the worst thread i've ever seen in my life

Thanks for reviving a thread from 2011 to let us know
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Ankle_Lift on September 22, 2023, 02:06:42 PM
got a blow job from a fat chick.

I gave her a wink and she gave me a gummer...
I LOVE fat chicks in the summer!!
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: FandomCereal on September 25, 2023, 08:43:59 AM
Expand Quote
this is the worst thread i've ever seen in my life
[close]

Thanks for reviving a thread from 2011 to let us know
no problem bro
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Uncle Flea on September 25, 2023, 11:22:18 AM
I once banged a whole family for room and bloard. It sucked.

I'm big on receiving blowjob's. Especially outdoors or while driving.

Might be fun to 69 ( favorite shit ever) in a 68 El Camino. My family had one but was too young to enjoy that at the time. I did try to steal the car once tho.

Was California af. Blacked out with a 327 vet swap. Shaved door handles. My mom's ex built it in Fresno.

I almost moved there in 92 but nope.

Like 5 years later or so I had a ford e250 camper with a tall top and all the fixings. Was a rolling acid orgy. Then it became a stationary coke cave surrounded by discarded Tampax and Trojans.

My dad told everyone in town how many pairs of underwear he found in it when he cleaned it out.

Everyone fucked in it. Not much gay stuff tho. People was still too afraid to be themselves at that time.

I didn't get to do gay stuff really until my 20s. I'm still ticking boxes on my bucket list though it's been rough since COVID started.

I've got that don't touch me unless you're a stranger and I'll probably not see you again attitude rn.

Sometimes I try to shed it but most of the bathroom goers around here are on some weird shit.

I miss living in Boston so badly

I'm horny for subway/commuter rail encounters. Something about the rhythm of the train. It's good. I'm an outdoors men looking for a chubby lil hubby with a 5- 6" piece of awesome who love to 69 their life away.. one who is safe and does not mind wandering.

Maybe they wanna get some too.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: formula420 on September 25, 2023, 06:49:37 PM
I'll just say the pleasures on west colfax is the best arcade in denver
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: layzieyez on September 26, 2023, 07:29:54 AM
I think I touched my wang with my hand once and bleach came out of it.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Dojsha Abuser on October 09, 2023, 08:07:33 AM
Nothing.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: addie pray on October 09, 2023, 08:37:08 AM
(https://isthatinthebible.files.wordpress.com/2015/05/pieter-schoubroeck-de-verwoesting-van-sodom-en-gomorra-the-destruction-of-sodom-and-gomorrah-16th-century.jpg)
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: IUTSM on October 09, 2023, 08:43:41 AM
I think I touched my wang with my hand once and bleach came out of it.

Find the antivax rallies and you’ll be catching some serious dome!
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Uncle Flea on October 09, 2023, 08:46:16 AM
Looking back not all of it is worth talking about.

Some friends don't like it when you bring drugs and a hooker sex show to visit with out warning

It drove one friend from his closet. Unfortunately I think he was just hoping from frying pan to frying pan because he got married and divorced later.

Now he plays pokemon go and watches TV.

This makes me wanna say that if you SECRETLY gay do not delay go out and get some play before you're too old to do so ok
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Ankle_Lift on October 09, 2023, 02:40:32 PM
I once banged a whole family for room and bloard. It sucked.

I'm big on receiving blowjob's. Especially outdoors or while driving.

Might be fun to 69 ( favorite shit ever) in a 68 El Camino. My family had one but was too young to enjoy that at the time. I did try to steal the car once tho.

Was California af. Blacked out with a 327 vet swap. Shaved door handles. My mom's ex built it in Fresno.

I almost moved there in 92 but nope.

Like 5 years later or so I had a ford e250 camper with a tall top and all the fixings. Was a rolling acid orgy. Then it became a stationary coke cave surrounded by discarded Tampax and Trojans.

My dad told everyone in town how many pairs of underwear he found in it when he cleaned it out.

Everyone fucked in it. Not much gay stuff tho. People was still too afraid to be themselves at that time.

I didn't get to do gay stuff really until my 20s. I'm still ticking boxes on my bucket list though it's been rough since COVID started.

I've got that don't touch me unless you're a stranger and I'll probably not see you again attitude rn.

Sometimes I try to shed it but most of the bathroom goers around here are on some weird shit.

I miss living in Boston so badly

I'm horny for subway/commuter rail encounters. Something about the rhythm of the train. It's good. I'm an outdoors men looking for a chubby lil hubby with a 5- 6" piece of awesome who love to 69 their life away.. one who is safe and does not mind wandering.

Maybe they wanna get some too.

That was an adventure.
Thanks for being you, bro.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: TheLurper on October 09, 2023, 10:25:22 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENnAa7rqtBM
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: RoaryMcTwang on October 10, 2023, 03:02:58 AM
“Things you’ve fucked” would have been a great title for this thread
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Gray Imp Sausage Metal on October 10, 2023, 04:09:19 AM
Stuck my things in some other things
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Billy Bitchcakes on October 10, 2023, 08:54:24 AM
Might be fun to 69 ( favorite shit ever) in a 68 El Camino

See I'm the type of brother and I like to have fun
She said 69, I said 68, and I owe you one
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Jehoshaphat Augustus on October 11, 2023, 10:40:51 AM
Have you ever sucked somebodys dick and then kicked their ass? Asking for a friend
https://youtu.be/vlq9UWWqe44
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Dojsha Abuser on October 11, 2023, 11:31:02 AM
Have you ever sucked somebodys dick and then kicked their ass? Asking for a friend
https://youtu.be/vlq9UWWqe44

have you ever sucked someones ass and then kicked their dick?
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: mrselfdestruct on November 29, 2023, 08:51:57 AM
yo momma
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Lenny the Fatface on November 29, 2023, 04:55:49 PM
In grad school I hooked up with this Chinese chick I did a project with. Right when we were getting naked she asked if I was into race play. I didn’t know wtf race play was, I assumed it was a stupid way of saying interracial sex so I said “yea, fo sho”. This bitch got on top of me and started screaming “nigger nigger nigger” in this super stereotypical Chinese immigrant accent. Riding the shit out my dick too, I was fucking scared.

Of course I ended up liking that bullshit, skeeted all over the place and never brought it up, but damn!
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Dojsha Abuser on November 30, 2023, 01:30:19 AM
In grad school I hooked up with this Chinese chick I did a project with. Right when we were getting naked she asked if I was into race play. I didn’t know wtf race play was, I assumed it was a stupid way of saying interracial sex so I said “yea, fo sho”. This bitch got on top of me in and started screaming “nigger nigger nigger” in this super stereotypical Chinese immigrant accent. Riding the shit out my dick too, I was fucking scared.

Of course I ended up liking that bullshit, skeeted all over the place and never brought it up, but damn!


SHIT.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: formula420 on November 30, 2023, 08:50:24 AM
Met up with a 75 year old guy this past weekend. He flogged and paddled me. Never been beaten up like that before but it was honestly great. Ill be going back for more, but it was pretty intense. Not something I could do every day.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Democratic Republic Of Mongo on November 30, 2023, 12:33:15 PM
Wrapped in a spiderweb of barbed wire, the countess bit harder into my ankles as the leather dog faced choir boy lapped at her heaving jowls like livestock at the trough. Outside the broken stained glass window, somehow more ornate after its violation, you could still hear the faint, distant sound of the shrieking clowns grow louder.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Willie on November 30, 2023, 01:24:55 PM
(https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/71lXNyGW0IL._AC_UY1000_.jpg)
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: skippersoldballs on November 30, 2023, 05:40:52 PM
Be honest I'd rather be balls deep in Bam. I feel like it's more dangerous. Lol.
If I gagged him he'd be a little closer to my type.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: mrselfdestruct on December 01, 2023, 06:23:57 AM
Met up with a 75 year old guy this past weekend. He flogged and paddled me. Never been beaten up like that before but it was honestly great. Ill be going back for more, but it was pretty intense. Not something I could do every day.
dawg that dudes older than my grandparents. glad you enjoyed!
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: formula420 on December 12, 2023, 10:02:34 AM
Expand Quote
Met up with a 75 year old guy this past weekend. He flogged and paddled me. Never been beaten up like that before but it was honestly great. Ill be going back for more, but it was pretty intense. Not something I could do every day.
[close]
dawg that dudes older than my grandparents. glad you enjoyed!

Last weekend I met with this girl on tindr. First time actually meeting in person off that app, I usually just get bots and flakes. She was a lot of fun and loved her pussy licked. I was inspired by my bdsm session and gave her some nice spanks. She liked it, hit me up the next day begging for more.
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: mrselfdestruct on December 12, 2023, 10:59:30 AM
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Met up with a 75 year old guy this past weekend. He flogged and paddled me. Never been beaten up like that before but it was honestly great. Ill be going back for more, but it was pretty intense. Not something I could do every day.
[close]
dawg that dudes older than my grandparents. glad you enjoyed!
[close]

Last weekend I met with this girl on tindr. First time actually meeting in person off that app, I usually just get bots and flakes. She was a lot of fun and loved her pussy licked. I was inspired by my bdsm session and gave her some nice spanks. She liked it, hit me up the next day begging for more.
met a nice 19 year old girl there when i was 16. i got chlamydia from her but sex was 10/10
Title: Re: things youve done (sexual)
Post by: Jehoshaphat Augustus on December 12, 2023, 03:57:47 PM
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Met up with a 75 year old guy this past weekend. He flogged and paddled me. Never been beaten up like that before but it was honestly great. Ill be going back for more, but it was pretty intense. Not something I could do every day.
[close]
dawg that dudes older than my grandparents. glad you enjoyed!
[close]

Last weekend I met with this girl on tindr...She was a lot of fun and loved her pussy licked. I was inspired by my bdsm session and gave her some nice spanks. She liked it, hit me up the next day begging for more.
REP checks out (props to you Big Peenachim mane!)