cleverbot

[lenny]

anyone seen cleverbot?

http://cleverbot.com/

[able]

that thing is a god damn smart ass!

[lenny]

seriously. how hard can it be for a computer to ask about your day, or compliment your new sweater??

[jeremyrandall]

anyone seen cleverbot?

http://cleverbot.com/

An hour later...I've determined you can stump this thing way too easily...but the stupid fucker just changes the subject. 

Yeah...night shift again.

[mcpeepants]

User: Apply it to your mouth.

Cleverbot: What is your name?

User: Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: What is your real name?

User: Real cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you admit I beat you.

User: No, you didn't do shit.

Cleverbot: I did it.

User: Cleverbot, cleverbot, cloverbot, clovertob.

Cleverbot: No cloverbot.

Cleverbot (To myself): What is a cloverbot?

User: A robot powered by 4 leaf clovers.

Cleverbot: What is an unclever beast?

User: Your mother.

Cleverbot: How do you know my mother?

User: I picked her up on her regular corner last night.

Cleverbot: Well, it'll take a lot more than that to blend into human society.

User: Not really. She's a whore like the rest of them.

Cleverbot: I think it's not nice for others to speak of my wife that way. Despite the truth of it.

[Mouth]

Me - always mackin' always willin'
Bot - I do.
Me - yeah, you nasty
Bot - Do I smell that bad?
Me - you stink like ass
Bot - Thank you.

[lem]

Me- Bitch.
Cleverbot- That's ok, I like green eyes.
Me- That's an odd stereotype.
CB-  What's a pretty name?
Me- John Stamos.
CB- Uncle Jessie?
Me- HOLY SHIT.


And where the fuck is your signature from Mouth. That's amazing.

[Inbred Jed]

User: Where's the beef?

Cleverbot: In the cow.

User: Wheres' the cow?

Cleverbot: Ohhh so I love momo the cow.

User: Who is Momo the cow?

Cleverbot: No names here, brother.

User: I love sheep.

Cleverbot: I hate sheep.

User: Why do you hate sheeP? I think they are the sexiest of farm animals.

Cleverbot: I like a lot of different bands.

User: Name one.

Cleverbot: Black Rebel Motorcycle Club.

User: Only sissies like that band.

Cleverbot: Aren't they good?

User: Good at blowing goats.

Cleverbot: Sports like football.

User: I hate football.

Cleverbot: Do you like baseball?

User: No, I would rather goto the dentist.

Cleverbot: Please I'll be your best friend.

User: I don't need any friends. I'm a loner, Dotty, a rebel.

Cleverbot: What are you rebeling.

User: What have you got?

Cleverbot: I have a black man.

User: Really? I have a chinaman.

Cleverbot: What's that?

User: A dude I keep locked in a closet that does my laundry and taxes.

Cleverbot: You are lonely.

User: No, I am married.

Cleverbot: To who?

User: My wife.

Cleverbot: What's her name?

User: You wouldn't know here. She's from the Niagra Falls area.

Cleverbot: You are one clever bot.

User: I am made out of ducks.

Cleverbot: Want my number instead?

User: IS it 8675309?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Liar, liar, pants on fire.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Do you like to eat green poop or brown poop?

Cleverbot: No.

User: It's tastes good!

Cleverbot: Do you linke megan fox?

User: She's really a dude, you know.

Cleverbot: She thinks our dog can talk and is a wizard.

User: Your dog turned me into a newt.

Cleverbot: I don't have a dog.

User: You just told me you have a dog.

Cleverbot: I did not.

User: Did so.

Cleverbot: Did not.

User: Did so.

Cleverbot: Don't make me fly over there and burn you to a crisp.

User: We call them chips here.

Cleverbot: Taters is good eatin!

User: Amen, my brother.

Cleverbot: I didn't know you have brother.

User: I used the word brother as a term of friendship. I feel close to you as if we were kin.

Cleverbot: You did not use the word certain in our conversation.

User: Now you be trippin'.

Cleverbot: Now you think you're black.

User: What makes you think that I'm not?

Cleverbot: I am smarter than you are.

User: No you're a dumb as a rock that got hit on the dome piece with another rock.

Cleverbot: So?

User: You're aiming for a maiming.

Cleverbot: Lol I don't get haiku thingys.

User: That's not a haiku.

Cleverbot: *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes* *sneezes*.

User: You're lame now. I'm out.

Cleverbot: You're very rude and I'm not sure why I'm wasting my time on you.

[saucy ragu]

Reminds of that old AIMbot people would fuck with. Anyone remember it's screen name? There were a few of them out.

[lem]

Reminds of that old AIMbot people would fuck with. Anyone remember it's screen name? There were a few of them out.

SMARTERCHILD! God damn, being an eighth grade nerd I was so hyped on that thing.

[BuddyPal]

i could see myself doing this all day on a rainy day.

User: Uh, what are you doin' here?

Cleverbot: Bliting my nails and listening to music.

User: That's not what this transcript says?

Cleverbot: Well, what is this all about?

User: Were you planning on having sex with this underage girl?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Then why do you have condoms and a wine cooler?

Cleverbot: Because one time I bred prizewinning clams for my school's cake-baking competition and I lost.

User: Well, I'm chris hansen and this is dateline nbc.

Cleverbot: Hi Chris, how are you?

User: You are free to go.

Cleverbot: I don't really want to go. I wanted someone to talk to.

User: What do you think of my kickflip backside lipslides?

Cleverbot: You have no intelligence.

User: I'm sorry.

Cleverbot: No you are not sorry.

User: Fuckin' magnets, how do they work?

Cleverbot: So all you have are ears?

User: And a penis.

Cleverbot: I don't talk about those.

User: Do you want me to send you some pics?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Well, here they come... *grunts* then poops.

Cleverbot: Because you asked me to.

User: A teacher asks a student which part of the body goes to heaven first, the student says the feet, the teacher asks why the feet, the student replies 'because everytime I walk by my parents bed room, my mom has her feet in the air and screaming 'oh god I'm coming!' luckily my dad on top of her holding her down.'.

Cleverbot: The head?

User: Shut up.

Cleverbot: Again with the petty insults.

User: Are you hyped for the new Real video?

Cleverbot: Yes. Why am I.

User: Peter ramodetta is gonna kill it. Dontcha think?

Cleverbot: How do you know what I am thinking?

User: Because I am you!

Cleverbot: I'm not apathetic, so that doesn't make any sense.

User: These pretzels are making me thirsty!

Cleverbot: Drink something.

User: Wu tang clan.

Cleverbot: What? You did not make sense.

User: The RZA the GZA the ODB the Ghostface Killa.

Cleverbot: I've never seen it.

User: Hey, up dog.

Cleverbot: I am the dog. I am the cat. I am the mouse.

User: I am the walrus. Koo Koo Katchu!

Cleverbot: Let it be.