Author Topic: Slap Messageboard Awards  (Read 11369 times)

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StabMasterArson

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #90 on: December 13, 2010, 11:16:49 AM »
i once got into a fight at a late night pizza spot and smacked a dude with a slince of pepperoni.

drunk

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #91 on: December 13, 2010, 12:56:06 PM »
i once threw a loaf of bread at my brother's face for no fucking reason
formerly toonie

boyan

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #92 on: December 13, 2010, 01:03:08 PM »
Ah, c'mon, who hasn't gotten into a fight at McDonalds? Shit's a right of passage.

oh last week I witnessed the most brilliant fight between a mom and her 4 year old daughter who couldn't get dessert before eating her chicken wings, the mom went to the toilet, she threw the wings underneath the chair in the dust, she got dessert, the mother noticed it and made her eat them! I think the girl started yelling and screaming fora good half hour before people started complaining and the mom caved in


sweet pee

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #93 on: December 13, 2010, 01:07:48 PM »
A few years ago, I was skating down the street and was hit in the back with a foot long kielbasa.
A car just drove by, and someone from the passenger side flung a fucking giant sausage at me.
I was super pissed at first, but once I looked down on the ground and saw what it was, I couldn't help but laugh...

Pavementi

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #94 on: December 13, 2010, 01:14:18 PM »
Gnarliest munson over the junson?
It's Bunson over the junson dude, Munson was Woody Harrelson's character from Kingpin.
Like Daewon said: if skateboarding is a ten story building, Rodney is on eleventh floor.

brazillionaire

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #95 on: December 13, 2010, 02:51:45 PM »
Expand Quote
the most depressing truth is that none of us are ultimately any more important than the people we're making fun of in those videos.
[close]

My initial impulse when I read this, was to be an even bigger asshole, and go back and qualify my original comment, and instead say it like this:

"Everyone of those fast-food scuffles were recently played at a senate meeting arguing the upside of forced sterilization. It was a compelling argument, the legislation has been passed, and the institutionalization of the process has begun--and it isn't the first time in this country."

But you are right, and "ultimately," none of us are "more important."

This could be a whole thread by itself, but it would not belong in this forum.

What I will say is, all of these individual scuffles would just be arbitrary manifestations of the terminal point in our civilization's decline, that we have reached--they are just fights right? Nothing unique about that?

But, in our great Orwellian, free-market, American consumer machine, these are signs of the machine malfunctioning in an area that should be the simplest and least conflictual--the places where the herd are fed.

As I said, it is the context of these fights--in and around fast-food restaurants--that makes these so depressing, far more than any of the people...or something like that.

man this is proper subject to academic research.. you know, it would be cool to get some information on what kind of psychologic, economic and antropologic matters are mixed into a good ol fff

Lurkenstock

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #96 on: December 13, 2010, 05:26:14 PM »
I was skating down the street and was hit in the back with a foot long kielbasa.

Stuff like this makes it all worthwhile.

Magic Pizza

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #97 on: December 14, 2010, 02:21:12 PM »
A few years ago, I was skating down the street and was hit in the back with a foot long kielbasa.
A car just drove by, and someone from the passenger side flung a fucking giant sausage at me.
I was super pissed at first, but once I looked down on the ground and saw what it was, I couldn't help but laugh...


Thought you were gonna say that once you looked down on the ground and saw what it was, you weren't pissed but thankful at the free feast that someone just presented to you. If someone threw a big sausage at me there would be a 90% probability that it would be inside me within the next 4 hours.

H8R part 4

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #98 on: December 14, 2010, 02:31:05 PM »
Ah, c'mon, who hasn't gotten into a fight at McDonalds? Shit's a right of passage.

my friend squirted a ketchup packet all over me at mcdonalds so i covered him with my entire milkshake.  the fight ended as soon as it began.
in a related note, we got a shitload of free breakfast burritos from mcdonalds once so we spent the next hour driving around and beaming them at people.  then we realize that if we drove a little slower and opened the burrito up, it made it way more messy for our targets. 
man, i was dick growing up but i'm prettys sure i'm dick now too.     

     

Inbred Jed

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #99 on: December 14, 2010, 04:01:22 PM »
How to get into a fight in a fast food restaurant
I don't know if I learned this in a skateboard magazine, but....

When you're eating fast food with your friends and one of them leaves to go to the bathroom you take the lid off their soda, open a ketchup packet, stick in on the straw and put the lid back on. When they come back and take a drink they get ketchup instead of soda.

Mackattack

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #100 on: December 14, 2010, 04:19:54 PM »
Expand Quote
A few years ago, I was skating down the street and was hit in the back with a foot long kielbasa.
A car just drove by, and someone from the passenger side flung a fucking giant sausage at me.
I was super pissed at first, but once I looked down on the ground and saw what it was, I couldn't help but laugh...

[close]

Thought you were gonna say that once you looked down on the ground and saw what it was, you weren't pissed but thankful at the free feast that someone just presented to you. If someone threw a big sausage at me there would be a 90% probability that it would be inside me within the next 4 hours.

« Last Edit: December 14, 2010, 04:22:08 PM by Macklin »

earlygrab

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #101 on: December 14, 2010, 04:21:16 PM »
How to get into a fight in a fast food restaurant
I don't know if I learned this in a skateboard magazine, but....

When you're eating fast food with your friends and one of them leaves to go to the bathroom you take the lid off their soda, open a ketchup packet, stick in on the straw and put the lid back on. When they come back and take a drink they get ketchup instead of soda.

classic, better with lemon juice and it wont ruin there soda.

NowhereInLife

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #102 on: December 14, 2010, 08:03:13 PM »
this crazy thread.

i wanna slap someone with a pizza now.

Inbred Jed

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #103 on: December 15, 2010, 03:35:12 PM »
Most completely inane argument of 2010 on SLAP? High Fivegate in OIAM thread

Magic Pizza

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #104 on: December 15, 2010, 04:34:05 PM »
^^^lol

ice nine

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #105 on: December 15, 2010, 05:09:58 PM »
I threw a piece of hot jizzy pizza going 50 km in my friends car, and hit/stuck to some dudes face hard.
I;m sure i;m not the only dc/monster/subaru type guy here

bentmode

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #106 on: December 15, 2010, 09:59:45 PM »
I threw a piece of hot jizzy pizza going 50 km in my friends car, and hit/stuck to some dudes face hard.

was that sentence a sexual reference?

Your friends car=his ass?
And hit/stuck to some dudes face=anal creampie facial?
threw a hot jizzy pizza at 50km=skeet skeet!?

gayest(as in two dicks, not a social dick) poster award
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« Last Edit: December 16, 2010, 08:49:37 AM by bentmode »
Han solo blew up the Death Star in Episode 4.  Heard it from a friend.  Reliable source.

Mullet Man

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #107 on: December 15, 2010, 10:26:07 PM »
Quote from: Magic Pizza
If someone threw a big sausage at me there would be a 90% probability that it would be inside me within the next 4 hours...

I feel like Michael Bluth listening to Tobias talk.
« Last Edit: December 15, 2010, 10:29:24 PM by Mullet Man »

TheFreshSC

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #108 on: December 15, 2010, 10:39:53 PM »
First good mullet man post

Chris P. Bacon

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #109 on: December 16, 2010, 01:56:23 PM »
A few years ago, I was skating down the street and was hit in the back with a foot long kielbasa.
A car just drove by, and someone from the passenger side flung a fucking giant sausage at me.
I was super pissed at first, but once I looked down on the ground and saw what it was, I couldn't help but laugh...
a long ass time ago i was at a bus stop with two friends, i was sitting in the middle. we only had like 5 minutes before the bus came, out of nowhere this van came screeching around the corner, the sliding door opens up and all i see is an arm fly out throw 3 eggs in our direction. my friends and i saw em coming and tried to use our skateboards as cover. it didnt work, for me at least... ? of course as the van drove off we could hear the sound of laughter and the smell of eggs. i got hit by all three, luckily i was wearing a hoodie cuz one hit me in the side of the head, one hit me in the gut and the other on my leg. fortunately the bus stop was across the street from my friends house so he hooked me up with some clothes so i didnt smell like egg all day... i was pissed but when they saw that i was the only one who got hit they couldnt help but start laughing hysterically, so i did too. haha

First good mullet man post
1900 posts deep, hahaha god damnit

« Last Edit: December 16, 2010, 01:58:42 PM by Chris P. Bacon »

Inbred Jed

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #110 on: December 16, 2010, 04:58:57 PM »
Expand Quote
A few years ago, I was skating down the street and was hit in the back with a foot long kielbasa.
A car just drove by, and someone from the passenger side flung a fucking giant sausage at me.
I was super pissed at first, but once I looked down on the ground and saw what it was, I couldn't help but laugh...
[close]
a long ass time ago i was at a bus stop with two friends, i was sitting in the middle. we only had like 5 minutes before the bus came, out of nowhere this van came screeching around the corner, the sliding door opens up and all i see is an arm fly out throw 3 eggs in our direction. my friends and i saw em coming and tried to use our skateboards as cover. it didnt work, for me at least... ? of course as the van drove off we could hear the sound of laughter and the smell of eggs. i got hit by all three, luckily i was wearing a hoodie cuz one hit me in the side of the head, one hit me in the gut and the other on my leg. fortunately the bus stop was across the street from my friends house so he hooked me up with some clothes so i didnt smell like egg all day... i was pissed but when they saw that i was the only one who got hit they couldnt help but start laughing hysterically, so i did too. haha

Expand Quote
First good mullet man post
[close]
1900 posts deep, hahaha god damnit



One time I had a plastic chicken in my car that I found somewhere. We drove by some kids skating  threw it at them  yelled "HERE"S YOUR FUCKING CHICKEN!"

Chris P. Bacon

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #111 on: December 17, 2010, 08:50:31 AM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
A few years ago, I was skating down the street and was hit in the back with a foot long kielbasa.
A car just drove by, and someone from the passenger side flung a fucking giant sausage at me.
I was super pissed at first, but once I looked down on the ground and saw what it was, I couldn't help but laugh...
[close]
a long ass time ago i was at a bus stop with two friends, i was sitting in the middle. we only had like 5 minutes before the bus came, out of nowhere this van came screeching around the corner, the sliding door opens up and all i see is an arm fly out throw 3 eggs in our direction. my friends and i saw em coming and tried to use our skateboards as cover. it didnt work, for me at least... ? of course as the van drove off we could hear the sound of laughter and the smell of eggs. i got hit by all three, luckily i was wearing a hoodie cuz one hit me in the side of the head, one hit me in the gut and the other on my leg. fortunately the bus stop was across the street from my friends house so he hooked me up with some clothes so i didnt smell like egg all day... i was pissed but when they saw that i was the only one who got hit they couldnt help but start laughing hysterically, so i did too. haha

Expand Quote
First good mullet man post
[close]
1900 posts deep, hahaha god damnit


[close]

One time I had a plastic chicken in my car that I found somewhere. We drove by some kids skating  threw it at them  yelled "HERE"S YOUR FUCKING CHICKEN!"
hahaha started laughing so hard

RipGrip

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #112 on: December 17, 2010, 09:46:26 AM »
i once got into a fight at a late night pizza spot and smacked a dude with a slince of pepperoni.
A few years ago, I was skating down the street and was hit in the back with a foot long kielbasa.
A car just drove by, and someone from the passenger side flung a fucking giant sausage at me.
I was super pissed at first, but once I looked down on the ground and saw what it was, I couldn't help but laugh...

These two are so awesome HAHA and i don't know why but the the fact that it says 'slince' has tears rolling down my face lolol

Mullet Man

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #113 on: December 17, 2010, 10:39:02 AM »
You guys are like the 1000th (and 1001st) people on here to say that, but you're (fortunately!) too dumb to notice. It would be even  funnier to quote them all in one post. I bet some of you have said it more than once, ironically enough.

I LOVE THAT!

Chris P. Bacon

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Re: Slap Messageboard Awards
« Reply #114 on: December 17, 2010, 02:10:59 PM »
You guys are like the 1000th (and 1001st) people on here to say that, but you're (fortunately!) too dumb to notice. It would be even?  funnier to quote them all in one post. I bet some of you have said it more than once, ironically enough.

I LOVE THAT!
haha i didnt say shit, i just thought the fact he said that with you having 1900 posts was funny. i dont remember who posted what two weeks ago ya know, just see shit and think its funny.