Meeting Jesse Alba

[Nosferatu]

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I saw Jesse Alba a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn't want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, "Oh, like you're doing now?"
I was taken aback, and all I could say was "Huh?" but he kept cutting me off and going "huh? huh? huh?" and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw Alba trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like "Sir, you need to pay for those first." At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually "to prevent any electrical infetterence," and then turned around and winked at me. I don't even think that's a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

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Where have I heard/seen this before?

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/i-saw-flying-lotus-in-a-grocery-store-copypasta

[Crailslideyoface]

I got yelled at by Andy McDonald when I was a kid

You must have forgotten to buckle your helmet.

[Brown Thunder]

Jesse Alba is a weak chinned lizard man

[Guwop]

I saw Jesse Alba at LES once, he was swearing and yelling at a little girl learning to skate and flipped off her mom as she was walking her daughter out who had started crying. kinda dick move but whatev, definitely has weak chin syndrome

[honey island]

never trust a man who isn't fat who has a fat mans chin.

[brucewillis]

When i met GT i smoked a fat joint with him and P-stone and we talked about Brazil, Black Sabbath and Slayer. Jesse needs to chill

[SonictheHedgehog]

Jesse Alba lol. Who cares?

I didn't recognize anyone in my NY trip last summer. To be fair though the skating started taking a backseat to partying after day 1.

I've had the most random encounters with pros. Paul Hart filmed a line of me at Venice sand pits, super cool dude. Another time I was skating the Forum quarterpipe structure alone in Barcelona when Leticia and a RED camera dude show up. She was cool. It was probably just weeks before her boob job. I got a pic with her lmao. Finally I got Alex Olson to sign this Todd Terje and the Olsens tour poster I had from 2017. He was weirded out, said he was a Terje fan and didn't want to ruin the poster. Ended up signing it anyway, and the poster is still rolled up somewhere in my closet just like it was pre-sign. Sick show though. Inspector Norse peak ftmfw

[John Florence]

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Ive drunkenly yelled at ben kadow and BA skating that park on houston in the 3d days, jesse at a john wilson video premiere, i was not a socially functional high school student

the other day i was in the city for an few hours for a sociology assignment, i saw an older black women blomen squat and pee in the subway station and then walked by blubba and saw cyrus trying something on black hubba while jesse and like, one of those brooklyn photographers, the one with glasses, watched and jesse mean mugged the shit out of me. it was cool

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the fact that you called it both “blubba” AND “black hubba” haunts my soul