Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session

[Glurmpz]

I’m not a fan of the “no boys allowed” girls’ sessions. Maybe it’s sour grapes on my part because these didn’t exist when I started skating 20 years ago. I had to learn alone in parking lots, then at 7am at the park before anyone else showed up and finally I had to endure skating with boys at the park as the only girl and I was shitty at skating on top of it.

But I also suspect my experience was pretty similar to most of my peers. Sure it was lonely at first and I did get some bullying/heckling but overall there were more people who were cool to me than not.

It feels like these women want to mitigate the awkward initiation phase of skating by creating a male-excluding safe space. Even without intimidating boys around I don’t think it’s possible. Skating is hard. You will look stupid on board for awhile before you get it. You will get hurt. You won’t go pro. No one outside of skating will give a shit about your skating so you won’t get that all important validation that all the kids are talking about these days. No athletic scholarships for skateboarding either. And the older you get the more ridiculous your peers find you for continuing to skate. Having a trial by fire phase at the outset is fair warning about what’s to come. If looking stupid in front of boys is enough to scare you away from skating it’s probably not the hobby for you. Because skateboarding absolutely requires that you cultivate some level of not giving a fuck.

I am totally for female meet ups that don’t involve kicking out males. I’ve participated in plenty. All-women — or even majority women sessions feel amazing! It’s more relaxed and friendly. But they should happen organically. You don’t need to vibe out all guys on account of their gender. And if a dude is being shitty—snaking the girls is a common one— telling the dude to knock it off is great practice for asserting yourself.

I am for creating women’s skate culture. I’m part of it, most all my skate friends are other women. I am NOT for bubble wrapped safe spaces that inhibit one’s ability to develop resilience and not-giving-a-fuck attitude that’s necessary for skateboarding.

Realize this isn’t sympathetic to the original post. Sorry you couldn’t skate when you wanted. I’m sorry that what should have been a good positive event has ended up sowing resentment by banning males.  but it also seems like you were resilient enough to have fun elsewhere. I’d like to see the next generation of female skaters have that some resilience. And I just came across an opportunity to spout off here. Okay rant done.

^This is one of the best, no BS takes on the whole thing. Thanks.

[ColinYourAssOut]

I flew back to my hometown on Monday and was itching to go to the local park I grew up skating. Rolled up there yesterday, got told that from now onward every second Thursday of the month is a girls skate only day & that I had to leave.

Unfortunately got into an argument with a load of people there and ended up just skating the car park with the other dudes that were turned away. The people organizing it said that female skaters often get intimidated by guys skating the park, which I suppose I can't relate to being male myself. I've never witnessed any hostility towards female skaters at that (or any) park, but then again this is just my perspective.

Trying to work out whether or not my annoyance was justified? or am I overreacting

Its a privately funded park (however its unsupervised, free to enter and open 24/7) so its entirely legit for them to establish rules like this, but this a park I spent virtually every day of my youth in and I'm now finding myself being turfed out due to my gender. I suppose it pissed me off because I'm used to being able to roll up to the park whenever I please.

Who are these women to tell you what you can't identify as?  They say gender is fluid now, so if you wanna be a girl for a day and join in, they don't have any right to tell you otherwise. Fair is fair.

[LongStoryShort]

Your frustration is totally justified.

Free entry for women on 'ladies nights' is cool, but if they want a session to themselves they can go hit the streets.

I'd even encourage free food, product, or lessons, but you don't create equality by disadvantaging the opposite sex, that's called sexism and it's fucking ridiculous that people don't see it.

I traveled to LA from Australia years ago and when i got to Venice beach the skatepark was closed to film a Shaun White commercial. I left disappointed with an even deeper hatred for Shaun White.

Taking a skatepark away from boys only encourages animosity towards the girls, it's fucking dumb.

I grew up skating in the 90s where skateparks were intimidating for everyone, and overcoming that awkward nervousness is an important part of building the resilience in any young skater whether you're a girl, boy, or miscellaneous

[palelight]

[botefdunn]

You are complaining about a private event taking place on private property. It's a skatepark, who cares. 

If you want to do something where you get to make up the rules, pick a less popular form of entertainment or go skate a grocery store parking lot.

[SneakySecrets]

How are these girls supposed to learn how to skate if there’s no one there to mansplain it to them?

[Alois Hitler Jr.]

were they gay?

[lilboosie]

Hold up  but did you trying come through with some white claws ?


Bet you didn’t smh

[cucktard]

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I’m not a fan of the “no boys allowed” girls’ sessions. Maybe it’s sour grapes on my part because these didn’t exist when I started skating 20 years ago. I had to learn alone in parking lots, then at 7am at the park before anyone else showed up and finally I had to endure skating with boys at the park as the only girl and I was shitty at skating on top of it.

But I also suspect my experience was pretty similar to most of my peers. Sure it was lonely at first and I did get some bullying/heckling but overall there were more people who were cool to me than not.

It feels like these women want to mitigate the awkward initiation phase of skating by creating a male-excluding safe space. Even without intimidating boys around I don’t think it’s possible. Skating is hard. You will look stupid on board for awhile before you get it. You will get hurt. You won’t go pro. No one outside of skating will give a shit about your skating so you won’t get that all important validation that all the kids are talking about these days. No athletic scholarships for skateboarding either. And the older you get the more ridiculous your peers find you for continuing to skate. Having a trial by fire phase at the outset is fair warning about what’s to come. If looking stupid in front of boys is enough to scare you away from skating it’s probably not the hobby for you. Because skateboarding absolutely requires that you cultivate some level of not giving a fuck.

I am totally for female meet ups that don’t involve kicking out males. I’ve participated in plenty. All-women — or even majority women sessions feel amazing! It’s more relaxed and friendly. But they should happen organically. You don’t need to vibe out all guys on account of their gender. And if a dude is being shitty—snaking the girls is a common one— telling the dude to knock it off is great practice for asserting yourself.

I am for creating women’s skate culture. I’m part of it, most all my skate friends are other women. I am NOT for bubble wrapped safe spaces that inhibit one’s ability to develop resilience and not-giving-a-fuck attitude that’s necessary for skateboarding.

Realize this isn’t sympathetic to the original post. Sorry you couldn’t skate when you wanted. I’m sorry that what should have been a good positive event has ended up sowing resentment by banning males.  but it also seems like you were resilient enough to have fun elsewhere. I’d like to see the next generation of female skaters have that some resilience. And I just came across an opportunity to spout off here. Okay rant done.

[close]

^This is one of the best, no BS takes on the whole thing. Thanks.

Really?

Women and men are socialized differently. Women (through socialization) tend to form groups and do things together.

Men are generally taught to ‘be tough, be independent’.

So yeah, women probably won’t feel comfortable going the lone wolf route that most of us took when we were young. They are making a space that works for them.

Faulting them for taking a creating a different  approach that shows that we as dudes are not taught to understand a female POV, and we expect them to act exactly like we do.

By the way, that socialization difference creates big differences in outcomes as we get older, and men tend to suffer more from loneliness in their old age.

[SatanicPanic]

Skateboarding is supposed to be fun. If leveling up is your thing it’s better to skate with positive people. If I wanted hazing I would have joined the football team. Anyway leave these women be, if they’re uncomfortable skating around dudes maybe ask them why.

[Madam, I'm Adam]

Why didnt you just fucking say you're a woman you fucknut?

Exactly. Like seriously baud, how hard is it to tape two

devils avacados

to your chest, build a friggin' wig out of leaves and branches, smear some ketchup on your lips, and barge that shit? You really want to be left out due to your lack of initiative?

[Rick_Kane]

I went to my local park the other day and it was closed because someone got murdered there and they were cleaning up the blood.

[neonblitz]

go skate some street or identify as a woman once a month

[50mm]

I went to my local park the other day and it was closed because someone got murdered there and they were cleaning up the blood.

Fucking hilarious because that’s the kind of shit that happens here.

[WastedHippy]

go skate some street or identify as a woman once a month

twice a month*

[Jimmy The Saint]

Many public parks also have beginner sessions or little kid sessions. Do you also get angry at those?

The fact of the matter is that skateparks (and many of the people who frequent them) are intimidating. Some people might show up at a park on a random day and just never skate because they don't feel confident enough or are afraid of doing something that might get them embarrassed--like push mongo, wear the wrong shoes, or grind with both of their trucks.

There is a tremendous amount of hypocrisy in skateboarding, and many of the same people who claim it's for everyone (with their words) will then try to vibe others out (with their actions). I'm a big fan of those that make sure the park locals let the timid ones have a run. Whether they are timid because they are inexperienced, small, young, or a regularly-maligned gender shouldn't matter (and if you don't think female skateboarders are regularly maligned in the skate community, you aren't paying attention).

My 7yo daughter regularly goes to parks with me and she will often refuse to skate, even though I am there. But when we have the park to ourselves, she has a great time. There is a lot that goes on inside each person's head, and their reasons for feeling intimidated are their own.

You sound like a total queef. 

[ArtVandelay]

Girls are just kooks in disguise! Am I right OP?!

[ColinYourAssOut]

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go skate some street or identify as a woman once a month

[close]

twice a month*

Nah, I only identify as a woman when I want to pretend I'm having my period.  It gives me the ability to justify being short with everyone around me when I just tell them I'm on the rag, then, they magically clear a path and give me leeway to be a total cunt for a few days.

Twice a month would be excessive and abusing my gender fluidity.

[neonblitz]

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go skate some street or identify as a woman once a month

[close]

twice a month*

[close]

Nah, I only identify as a woman when I want to pretend I'm having my period.  It gives me the ability to justify being short with everyone around me when I just tell them I'm on the rag, then, they magically clear a path and give me leeway to be a total cunt for a few days.

Twice a month would be excessive and abusing my gender fluidity.

Your downfall is that kind soul of yours, look after number 1

[offkilter]

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I went to my local park the other day and it was closed because someone got murdered there and they were cleaning up the blood.

[close]

Fucking hilarious because that’s the kind of shit that happens here.

Yeah that is hilarious 

[Rick_Kane]

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I went to my local park the other day and it was closed because someone got murdered there and they were cleaning up the blood.

[close]

Fucking hilarious because that’s the kind of shit that happens here.

[close]

Yeah that is hilarious 

Hilarious wasn't my first impression, but after reading this thread I found it ironic that people consider skateparks "safe spaces" when drug dealing and murder happens in most of them.

[Swithflip]

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I went to my local park the other day and it was closed because someone got murdered there and they were cleaning up the blood.

[close]

Fucking hilarious because that’s the kind of shit that happens here.

[close]

Yeah that is hilarious 

[close]

Hilarious wasn't my first impression, but after reading this thread I found it ironic that people consider skateparks "safe spaces" when drug dealing and murder happens in most of them.

Truth.

[Kolostrum]

These ladies are in for a rude awakening when they realize that girls are more judgmental/cliquish/harsh/bitchy/nasty/jealous/ to each other than we could ever be to them.

[Ziad]

put on a dress and identity as a transgender no one will have the balls to tell you can't enter, be the victim dude!

[Artvandeskate]

It sucks that you got kicked out but we have to let the women have their time it’s only fair there are lots of men that don't respect what they are trying to do. I’m not saying that’s you but you are being roped into that group and I hope that changes soon and we can all skate together with all genders and races and we all just live in one space and appreciate each other. That would be really awesome.

[Swithflip]

I never see any skate girl being disrespected in a skate spot. Males are too kind with them. I think whem um skate you arent black, white, spanish, woman or man. You are skateboarder. Be happy.

[swanronson]

This happened to me and some friends too. It was an indoor park and it was raining out so we headed there after work to get a little roll in but we’re turned away because of girls night. It was a little annoying because It’s harder to get out to skate due to work and family but I understand why. My friend made a massive argument out of it which was pretty embarrassing...on the other side it’s kind of weird because we would always include and make an effort to talk to girl skaters because it’s cool to see them out there getting into it. I think they don’t understand that every skater feels intimidated when they are learning and there is someone at the park shredding, I can’t tell you how many sessions I just sat and watched as a youngster because I was intimidated.

[FupaQuesadilla]

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Focus

[close]

you should've told them you are a woman

This is what i would have done, and if somebody told me they didnt believe me id spit in their fucking face.

It shouldnt be a guys problem or concern that another gender is physically inferior. If you cant skate for shit, you shouldnt be at a skatepark period.

This affirmative action shit is only going to make females look more and more like walking vaginas. 
If you dont want male skaters to become
Sexists, dont kick them out of a skatepark just to boost girls self esteem.

[FupaQuesadilla]

you weren't allowed to skate at a girls only session because you're not a girl? no, your annoyance is not justified in the slightest. do some basic research on feminism and you might understand what happened today and why you look like such a clown right now

If youre not a troll then im glad youre poor as fuck.

[FupaQuesadilla]

This male hating shit makes me glad girls for the most part cant even stand on a skateboard without eating shit.