Author Topic: SOBRIETY  (Read 53495 times)

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Easy Slider

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1020 on: May 28, 2024, 03:48:02 AM »
Great testimony @Gnar_Gnar

why come?

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Coastal Fever

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1021 on: May 28, 2024, 06:18:02 AM »
So sorry for your loss and congrats on your success Gnar Gnar.  Amazing contribution to this thread.

One of my buddies reached out after I posted about my 1 year anniversary.  Heís a successful guy in every sense of the word, but obviously feeling uneasy with his beer and weed habit.  He had a lot of questions and I did my best to answer them all and encourage him to do whatís right for him.  Felt really nice to be the good example for once.

NoComply180

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1022 on: May 28, 2024, 08:44:39 AM »
Can relate to a lot of what you said @Gnar_Gnar , and sorry for the loss of your mother. Fuck booze and what it does to people.

I definitely hear you on the boundary setting because people expect you to do things for them/help since youíre sober. Even little things like getting volunteered to drive everywhere since youíre not going to be fucked up. I feel like some people in my life assume I have it easier since Iím not drinking and donít see the work it takes mentally and otherwise to continue not drinking.

Not going to lie, now that itís summer here and warm, thereís been some moments where Iíve had ďah fuck, what if I just went on a bender at the beach this weekend and got back to sobriety next weekĒ thoughts/impulses, thankfully Iím not acting on them and itís not been overwhelming, but itís funny because a week ago I posted in here about booze being so out of my mind.

Stay strong slappers.



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hmmoookay

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1023 on: May 28, 2024, 09:41:22 AM »
Beautifully said GnarGnar and I'm incredibly sorry about your mother, but I'm glad you're with us and stuck with it. Like you said, sobriety really is a gift, in so many ways, including the ability to process what's happening around you and to you in a healthy way. I wish you continued success friend.


Not going to lie, now that itís summer here and warm, thereís been some moments where Iíve had ďah fuck, what if I just went on a bender at the beach this weekend and got back to sobriety next weekĒ thoughts/impulses, thankfully Iím not acting on them and itís not been overwhelming, but itís funny because a week ago I posted in here about booze being so out of my mind.

Stay strong slappers.


I have had a similar experience the past week or so. I recently moved and for lack of a better explanation I have family around, and more family will be moving here, but this past weekend I was truly alone for the first time in a minute (my sister went out of town for memorial day) and I had that exact same thought. "Who's gonna know?" Type beat. I didn't drink because like you it's ultimately not really on my mind and I played that tape forward. I know what will happen. But damn, it's crazy how this shit will just sneak up on you if you let it. Unfortunately, I am not necessarily in the most "sober friendly" part of the US, that's as specific as I'll get, but I know there's likeminded folks here and I'll find em eventually. It's a reminder of how important a support system is, including all y'all!

ralf_

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1024 on: May 29, 2024, 01:18:54 PM »
wittgenstein says meaning is usage and i think the sk8 community as a whole is stoked af on ludwig.

Coastal Fever

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1025 on: June 04, 2024, 04:46:17 AM »
Not sure if thereís any other Waxahatchee fans in here, but she just made this post regarding her 6yr anniversary, which I found very nicely written and inspiring, for anyone interested;

https://katiecrutchfield.substack.com/p/six-years

Monolithic Flick

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1026 on: June 04, 2024, 07:24:21 AM »
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hd3EiVVB9D0

Thanks for posting this, it was an interesting listen.  Poor Patrick O'Dell sounds like a really unhappy person although he's obviously dealing the best he can with life.  All had good stories.

Abyss1

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1027 on: June 04, 2024, 08:20:48 AM »

Thanks for posting this, it was an interesting listen.  Poor Patrick O'Dell sounds like a really unhappy person although he's obviously dealing the best he can with life.  All had good stories.

I didn't know Patrick is in Oakland now...kinda cool to hear that.  Checking this out now sounds good

GAY

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1028 on: June 05, 2024, 06:27:13 AM »
Hey gang.

Today my sobriety date is old enough to legally drink.

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1029 on: June 05, 2024, 07:32:00 AM »
Hey gang.

Today my sobriety date is old enough to legally drink.
Booom!!
Nice!

hmmoookay

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1030 on: June 05, 2024, 01:14:50 PM »
Hey gang.

Today my sobriety date is old enough to legally drink.

Congrats!! Incredible.

Gnar_Gnar

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1031 on: June 05, 2024, 01:57:33 PM »
Hey gang.

Today my sobriety date is old enough to legally drink.
Right on Gay.  You love to see it.

That panel video was heavy.  I feel bad for dogging Neen.  Now that I'm in the gym and trying to prolong my skating I can see where he comes from.  Glad to see him sober.
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ralf_

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1032 on: June 06, 2024, 03:04:28 AM »
Hey gang.

Today my sobriety date is old enough to legally drink.

ufff!!
wittgenstein says meaning is usage and i think the sk8 community as a whole is stoked af on ludwig.

mfweeno

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1033 on: June 06, 2024, 08:16:08 PM »
Hey gang.

Today my sobriety date is old enough to legally drink.
Congrats and massive respect, you are inspiring to everyone in recovery.

My wife (who also doesnít drink anymore) and I just got back from vacation. We were happy not to spend the money on booze, feel shitty/sick/hungover as a consequence, forget shit/act a fool, etc. and had a solid time.

This year has had ups and downs for me personally on the mental health side of my recovery (which I am - gratefully - able to address and am actively doing so). That being said, being able to authentically experience these good times is why Iím grateful to be on the wagon.

I had the above thought this morning and wanted to share it with you guys. I hope everyone is thriving, hanging on, or at least staying out of harmís way.

CarcassToss

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1034 on: June 06, 2024, 08:16:45 PM »
Interesting that the thread on Lil B's kinda sketch sounding recovery center got deleted.

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1035 on: June 07, 2024, 01:27:41 PM »
at 11 months... quick share

had a founders event at a brewery where they had us a private tasting in the brew room with all the brewing equipment. they had flights for everyone on the table and the brewmaster talked through all the beers. fortunately they had NA beer in the can and i just keep a pint of NA. it was a little weird when the brewmaster would be describing the beers and everyone was tasting them and commenting on them except me but it wasn't really a big deal. i ironically uber'd there and home but because i wanted to work in the car as it was 1 hour from my house. and i had plently of energy to work and wasn't tired when i got home and had a great night with the family.

shouldn't

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1036 on: June 08, 2024, 03:39:35 AM »
today is day 5 no alcohol. well day 6 actually because itís 5am here but, i just woke up. the first 3 days i didnít sleep very much at all and it was really driving me crazy, which is apart of why i always go back at some point within the 3 day mark. after getting through the first 3 horrible days of not sleeping, constant racing thoughts and heightened anxiety (which was already unbearable before) i felt really good yesterday. i had energy an insane amount of energy yesterday, along with an actual motivation to get things done that i have been putting off everyday for months. i felt very positive about the future for the first time in years and finally felt confident along with a sense of self worth, almost superhuman levels. i still hadnít slept great the night before, my sleeping pattern has been very bizarre. all of the sudden yesterday i crashed around 4pm after eating and struggled to stay awake until a decent time to go to sleep so i can fix my sleep schedule. anyhow, i feel asleep on the couch around 9pm and kept sleeping in increments of 2 hours whilst having the most bizarre and vivid dreams. not good ones. i kept going back to sleep until this last one where i just woke up and feel too offput to want to go back to sleep even though i still feel very drained. when i was drinking i never really had dreams, or at least didnít remember them. now i feel really depressed again right now after waking up from the last one and donít really want to go back because i donít want to have another bad dream but, i also donít want to stay up and feel exhausted for the rest of the day. it may sound corny but the ave episode really hit home on a lot of levels in terms of my drug/alcohol addictions throughout the years and how many of those years i have lost by not giving it all up a long time ago. i have been diagnosed with ptsd due to traumatic events from my childhood and now theyíre all popping up in my dreams when iím trying to fix my lifestyle problems in order to better myself. itís really demotivating and scary. yesterday i felt like a superhuman who could just go skate by myself and meet new friends again, i could finally go to a public place without feeling like everyone is looking at/judging me, i felt comfortable in my own skin, i felt confident that whatever risk i take next financially in terms of finally starting my own thing that i have been wanting to for so long would actually be successful. now i feel really disorientated and back to how i felt before, where i just want to sit in my cave and let the days go by while i avoid the outside world. i just feel super manic and depressed and iím tired of the rollercoaster of it all but, i still donít want to just go back to drinking to escape from it and be able to sleep normally but i also donít want to feel like this. iím not sure if anyone else has had this type of experience in the beginning of stopping? i also was taking random month breaks not too long ago, few and far between though. the part ave speaks on, where he talks about locking himself inside and waiting for it to be midnight really hit home and made me cry a bit because that has been me for a while because they stop selling alcohol here, so i would make myself buckle down until then just so that i couldnít buy alcohol and keep drinking but then i wouldnít sleep. most nights though,I would make it until 11:30 or 11:40, sometimes even 11:50 and then just race to the store to buy my 12 pack and tall can just out of fear of not being able to sleep and feeling like this. most times i would tell myself that i would still try to go to bed right away and if i couldnít, i would slam a few really quick in order to catch a buzz and pass out. that usually ended up turning into me drinking all of it by 3 or 4 am, blacking out and waking up the next day in the afternoon feeling awful and unable to eat my one daily meal until around 9pm. iím obviously sick of that and trying to escape from it but, these kinds of results make it very difficult for me.

imagine fucking the dog shit outta chris roberts

ralf_

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1037 on: June 09, 2024, 03:06:28 AM »
18 months.
it's getting real.
wittgenstein says meaning is usage and i think the sk8 community as a whole is stoked af on ludwig.

Ankle_Lift

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1038 on: June 09, 2024, 10:05:55 AM »
today is day 5 no alcohol. well day 6 actually

Keep going. You can do it. Keep busy, buy a case of Bubbly to drink instead. Cracking the can and holding the can has that familiar feeling but it's not booze.


Ralf_ - 1.5 years keep going!

i had plently of energy to work and wasn't tired when i got home and had a great night with the family.

That's the best part about not drinking to be honest. Your family is lucky to have you.

I had a hard one on Friday. A buddy and his band were playing at a little venue. cool place, beers "by donation" kind of place.
It was the kind of place you just casually stand around and drink some beer and listen to the band. I was ok with not having a beer in hand, it's all good, but those types of things I used to really enjoy having some beers and just hanging out, listening to music, get a little buzz going on. The venue is out of the way, like outside of the city, so a lot of people had to drive back to the booze wasn't flowing freely kind of thing.

Between bands I was outside with my friend and his girlfriend and they were smoking weed and some random dude is like, "who wants to shotgun some beer?!" And he had a bunch of beers. In the past I would've been like "fuck ya let's do this" and crush those beers with buddy.
When I refused, and my friend and his girl refused, they had to drive home, dude got like, indignant, and upset? Like oh come on drink these. It was really off putting.

This guy and his buddy were total wastoids though, like falling all over and shit, and I kept thinking to myself, "damn did I used to be like that? I did, I think I was like that"
 
Oh well.



Easy Slider

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1039 on: June 09, 2024, 10:31:47 AM »
@Sleazy  impressive feat, I wouldn't even have bothered going there tbh.

@shouldn't  hang in there man, I guess your body needs time to readjust after years of intoxication. Try and get a regular schedule. I always was one to stay up late, getting drunk and/or high and sleeping late but since I am sober this has shifted and now I am the opposite, going to sleep really early. This allows me to just sleep until I wake up naturally and still be early enough for work. Anyway, hopefully you'll figure out what suits you best.

@Ankle_Lift I had a similar experience lately. It's been quite a while I've been to a concert but since the Circle Jerks were in town I figured it would probably be the last occasion to see them live. I went with a friend who really likes to drink but after almost five years sober I am now at a point where I can have a guy getting drunk next to me without even thinking about having one myself. I am not saying this to brag but to encourage y'all to persevere, the itch is definitely going to get less and less the longer you stay away from the sauce.
why come?

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hmmoookay

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1040 on: June 09, 2024, 10:32:18 AM »
@Ankle_Lift I feel you. I had a similar situation last Thursday; went out with my sister and her boyfriend to bingo night at a local brewery. They're both incredibly supportive but being around a lot of folks just kinda casually boozing, watching them get another drink and another, and another....it was weird. It's the first time I've been out to a bar in a very, very long time. Don't get me wrong, had a great time playing bingo. This place also makes their own kombucha, rootbeer, and fizzy lemonade (all on tap) so they're doing their part as far as NA options goes. But, it was a trip being in that kind of environment again for sure.

On a separate note, I'm happy to share that after leaving both my teaching positions at the end of last semester, and what seems like a long time of sending out applications only to get rejections in return, I landed a job (not teaching) at a university in my new city. Got the call on Friday, and the director of my department seemed really excited to offer me the job. In my in person interviews last week, I was asked what my biggest accomplishment of the last 5 years was. I said my sobriety, because it's true. I explained a bit on what I meant about that (not just being sober, but how my sobriety kind of guides how I go about life in multiple aspects) but the only reason I say that is to emphasize not being afraid to put your sobriety out there. Is it what got me the job? I really don't know. But it was the honest answer and one I felt I sounded confident in, and I'm sure they took those things into consideration.

I celebrated with some great local pizza and some sparkling waters. And, just now, my phone notified me that I am 27months sober today. A lot going on, haha.

Much love y'all and congrats to all the recent successes in here. Y'all should be very proud of yourselves!

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1041 on: June 09, 2024, 10:41:38 AM »
Expand Quote
today is day 5 no alcohol. well day 6 actually
[close]

Keep going. You can do it. Keep busy, buy a case of Bubbly to drink instead. Cracking the can and holding the can has that familiar feeling but it's not booze.


Ralf_ - 1.5 years keep going!

Expand Quote
i had plently of energy to work and wasn't tired when i got home and had a great night with the family.
[close]

That's the best part about not drinking to be honest. Your family is lucky to have you.

I had a hard one on Friday. A buddy and his band were playing at a little venue. cool place, beers "by donation" kind of place.
It was the kind of place you just casually stand around and drink some beer and listen to the band. I was ok with not having a beer in hand, it's all good, but those types of things I used to really enjoy having some beers and just hanging out, listening to music, get a little buzz going on. The venue is out of the way, like outside of the city, so a lot of people had to drive back to the booze wasn't flowing freely kind of thing.

Between bands I was outside with my friend and his girlfriend and they were smoking weed and some random dude is like, "who wants to shotgun some beer?!" And he had a bunch of beers. In the past I would've been like "fuck ya let's do this" and crush those beers with buddy.
When I refused, and my friend and his girl refused, they had to drive home, dude got like, indignant, and upset? Like oh come on drink these. It was really off putting.

This guy and his buddy were total wastoids though, like falling all over and shit, and I kept thinking to myself, "damn did I used to be like that? I did, I think I was like that"


Im back living in the same neighborhood where i cut my partying chops, where i started drinking at the same bars my dad and granddad drank at. Its where i left from when i quit drinking almost 9 years ago.

Been back here about 9 months. In fact, today is 1 year from the day i came back from CA to shake the dudes hand on buying his house. But anyways, all of a sudden, within the past week, i have run into dudes i hung out with at separate points in time. Im talking cats i would just get wasted with. Seeing em, like theyíre not bad dudes or anything, but the only reason we hung out was cuz we liked to get fucked up at any time, anywhere, however. Im glad no one has asked for my contact info because i have no reason to hang with them.


Its a weird scene to be around, for sure. But itís like fuck, im 39, skating, bought a crib, pretty healthy and most importantly, i am ALIVE. So many of the other cats that stayed behind are dead. Its a good day to be alive. I would probably be dead if i were still drinking. If DUI didnt get me, suicide or dope would have, for real.


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NoComply180

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1042 on: June 10, 2024, 12:46:28 PM »
Itís so jarring when someone applies pressure to drink for me now. Everyone I socialize with is at youngest late 20s and mostly 30-50s so it comes off as both immature and pretty sad now that Iím on the other side. I went to a small gathering at a friendsí place Saturday and I showed up a bit late, people were sloppy as hell, throwing up, passing out, commenting about how shitty Sunday was going to be. Sipped a few NA beers, went home, played computer games and woke up early Sunday feeling great.

Itís getting easier every day, July will be 6 months.

Props to everyone for the shares in here, this thread really lifts me up.



Him ah fall off building an bumboclot him legs

dstrytruitt

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1043 on: June 10, 2024, 01:18:24 PM »
So stoked for everyone in here! Community is what keeps me sober so having this thread is always helpful to read. I also go to (mostly Zoom) meetings and over the weekend the topic at a meeting was living in the moment. Before I got sober, I would constantly be looking for the next thing; the next drink, the next task to take care of, the next girl, the next whatever...never really satisfied or content with my current situation or happy with what was happening right then and there. I've missed out on a lot of happiness and really cool shit that I now slow down and enjoy and for that I'm extremely grateful to my homegroups and the Slap sobriety gang. Keep taking of yourselves and each other!

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1044 on: June 10, 2024, 03:59:32 PM »
@shouldn't  thanks for sharing. few things i experienced:

- i always feel like shit for 2-3 days after stopping drinking, even if just for a day. then on the 4th ish day i will feel great but then crash around 2ish. this is why moderation didn't work for me. keep pushing and you shouldn't get that day 4 crash anymore.
- i was going to share that AVE video, so good
- you might try the caffeine delay, if you wait 1-2 hours before having you first cup you will feel like you are flying all day, i've been loving it.
- the dreams is because when you drink do don't go in the stage of sleep where you dream.
- to fall to sleep my version of counting sheep is i focus really hard on skate tricks, how i'd position my foot ect... until i fall asleep and if my mind races to some stress crazy shit i go back to slappy crook grind and start thinking about skating

@hmmoookay way to go man!

@IUTSM thanks man, i feel lucky to have them

@Easy Slider thanks man, having the na beers is really more than enough for me and i kind of feel a certain sense of quite pride when i'm not drinking, sort of like being the only skateboarder at the park with a bunch of bladders sessioning  ;D


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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1045 on: June 11, 2024, 07:58:26 AM »
Yeah, everyone, thank you all for your stories.  They are inspiring.  I had a 12 day streak then went on vacation and busted it. Now on an 8 day streak.  Really want this one to last longer.  I am eating sugar like a fat person though.  Like I'm wondering if I might be pushing myself to diabetes.  This thread is something I go to for reinforcement so again thanks all.

NoComply180

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1046 on: June 11, 2024, 09:11:49 AM »
Yeah, everyone, thank you all for your stories.  They are inspiring.  I had a 12 day streak then went on vacation and busted it. Now on an 8 day streak.  Really want this one to last longer.  I am eating sugar like a fat person though.  Like I'm wondering if I might be pushing myself to diabetes.  This thread is something I go to for reinforcement so again thanks all.
I had huge sugar cravings the first few weeks. I still eat more sugar now than when I was drinking. I go through 3 or so pints of ice cream a week - still 25 lbs lighter than I was January 1



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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1047 on: June 11, 2024, 01:26:05 PM »
Yeah, everyone, thank you all for your stories.  They are inspiring.  I had a 12 day streak then went on vacation and busted it. Now on an 8 day streak.  Really want this one to last longer.  I am eating sugar like a fat person though.  Like I'm wondering if I might be pushing myself to diabetes.  This thread is something I go to for reinforcement so again thanks all.

whats your reason for stopping in the first place, for me those reminders even it was just to get a better nights sleep is whats keeping me from drinking.    Also on the sugar tip, dont know if you have a good dental plan but that shit will catch up to you in that area...cavities and gum disease.  Dont know much about diabetes but I always thought you develop is in your younger years from too much processed sugar.

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1048 on: June 11, 2024, 02:02:36 PM »
It's easy to sub one addiction to another.  If food helps you cope for now, fuck it I say.  Better than hitting the bottle or substances and burning bridges or further damaging ones life.  I would think some sugar is a nice reward for a day sober in early recovery, but that's just me. 

Finally had some stuff come to a head with a buddy.  I got accused of drunk shaming for not tolerating drunken asshole behavior, while he's enabling it.  Had to cut a buddy out of my life and kinda been grieving that loss this week.  He was sober but not in recovery.  White knuckling and dry drunking are a tough road.  Feeling proud that I developed the confidence to say no to people who aren't good for me.  Before I would have stuck around.

Been dealing with a ton of rejection in the industry and with women too.  Seems like tough times for creators.  Keeping strong with hobbies, good friends, my family, and taking care of myself.  It's been nice to develop the tools to cope with this kinda thing, and accept that some days, or weeks, are harder than others and it's okay to feel bad about it.  Working hard to appreciate the little things, and be grateful for the gift and clarity of sobriety.
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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #1049 on: June 11, 2024, 03:32:46 PM »
nice one @Gnar_Gnar

one thing i've been doing for dealing with stress is i've taught myself to ignore stress or pretty close and made a deal that if i'm starting to feel stressed, i'm going to schedule some time to do some planning and pause the stress till then. usually i'll have a day where i'm feeling a little stressed to be honest, i force my self not to focus on it as much as i can and i then spend time planning around whatever the issue is. i usually feel better after having a plan even if that plan requires me to go through some shitty things or take on a bunch of risk. obviously some problems are bigger than taking 30 mins to plan to fix... if one of my kids gets cancer gonna need a new tool for stress but for most things it's been helpful for me.