Author Topic: SOBRIETY  (Read 46748 times)

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fakie nollie

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #270 on: April 13, 2020, 07:33:28 PM »
I'll try to avoid telling my entire life story here, but basically I'm 32 now and I've been drinking way too heavily since my early 20s. Before that I would binge drink on weekends, but at some point it started happening all through the week.

At it's worst, a few years ago, I was drinking up to 20 beers a night, at least every second day. Often the benders would last a good four or more days, then I might have one day off.

Since I met my fiance three years ago I've managed to keep it mostly to weekends, but I'm still unable to control myself once I hit the bottle. Every weekend, I literally write a list of mistakes not to repeat, yet I end up repeating them every time.

It's mostly staying up on my own, drinking a stupid amount and listening to music in a trance until I pass out on the couch. Often I'll wake up about 4am, stumble off to bed, then I'm awake at 6am without fail and can't get back to sleep.

It really fucks my weekends because I always feel like shit come Saturday. Lacking sleep, irritable, regretful of all the stupid fucking messages I sent to people the night before (usually just telling them how awesome they are - I'm a happy drunk for the most part) and time I wasted scrolling through instagram like a zombie. If I'm back home with my friends, it can be even worse because I get so excited that we just drink all afternoon while skating and then all fucking night. Fat chance of having a good skate after that.

Usually the only way to feel better and to make myself skate (or do any of my other hobbies) is to get back on the bottle. This has become another problem too: I find it really difficult to skate without drinking. It just feels so much better and I'm so much more motivated when I'm drinking beers.

Then there's Mondays, they're usually always fucked, even if i don't drink on Sunday. I don't feel normal again until Tuesday or Wednesday, and by Friday, I'm ready to do it all over again.

Well, two weekends ago I woke up Sunday morning in my bed, in a puddle of my own piss. I don't think that's ever happened before. My fiance - with whom I'm trying for a baby at the moment - was so fucking bummed. I was convinced last weekend would be different, but it was the same old story (sans pissing the bed).

Anyway, I think I've come to the end of the road and need to make some changes. I've felt like this a million times before. I can stay motivated for a time, and then something clicks and I'm back to my old self. Last October I went a whole month without a drop. It was great for about two weeks, then it was torture.

Part of the issue is that I cannot do moderation at all. I suppose, I'd ideally like to be able to keep drinking in moderation - but I'm starting to realise I may need to just quit altogether.

Any advice would be much appreciated.

I wrote a massive response but ended up deleting it. Given your situation, I would try to find an AA meeting around you. Being free, you'll meet some characters but you'll also meet some people you'll see eye-to-eye with. I don't go to NA anymore but, when I did, it was good knowing I wasn't alone and could talk to people who know what it's like.

EdLawndale

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #271 on: April 14, 2020, 10:45:30 PM »
Flying Rodent, do you consider this your "bottom"?
Is this the lowest point you are willing to let your drinking take you? Pissing yourself and scrolling your valuable time away off into The Ether?

If so, sounds like you wanna quit, bro. I say pick a date and go cold turkey if your body can handle it. Throw out all alcohol around your house. Find some AA meet ups either irl or online if ur under lockdown rn.

What did it feel like for you where the last 2 weeks of a past sober month were "torture"? Maybe if you can come up with a plan for how you are going to combat those feelings this time around, you will be more successful.

Does your fiancee drink? What's her deal?

As for hobbies and skating, don't worry about that shit. That shit is like riding a bike. You won't ever lose it and once your body and mind have acclimated to sober living, the creative and joyous stuff will be waiting for you to pick it back up.

Good luck, holmes.
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JudoOrigami

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #272 on: April 15, 2020, 04:53:08 AM »
What helped me quit drinking was having no money I would just spend any extra money that would normally go to drinking at the start of the month on something else

shoes over booze

Abyss1

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #273 on: April 15, 2020, 12:38:12 PM »
What helped me was actually addressing why I was drinking so much in the first place

Flying Rodent

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #274 on: April 18, 2020, 03:35:38 AM »
Flying Rodent, do you consider this your "bottom"?
Is this the lowest point you are willing to let your drinking take you? Pissing yourself and scrolling your valuable time away off into The Ether?

If so, sounds like you wanna quit, bro. I say pick a date and go cold turkey if your body can handle it. Throw out all alcohol around your house. Find some AA meet ups either irl or online if ur under lockdown rn.

What did it feel like for you where the last 2 weeks of a past sober month were "torture"? Maybe if you can come up with a plan for how you are going to combat those feelings this time around, you will be more successful.

Does your fiancee drink? What's her deal?

As for hobbies and skating, don't worry about that shit. That shit is like riding a bike. You won't ever lose it and once your body and mind have acclimated to sober living, the creative and joyous stuff will be waiting for you to pick it back up.

Good luck, holmes.

Thanks to everyone who replied, sorry it took me a week to reply.

Fakie Nollie - I've definitely considered AA before. Not seriously, but it's crossed my mind. I know there is a group where I live, I'll have to find out if they're doing it online during the pandemic. Hopefully they won't snicker at me when I explain "I'm an alcoholic who drinks on weekends". Hah.

EdLawndale - No, it's not my lowest point. A few years back I was much lower than I am now and drinking more. Living alone, avoiding my friends, smoking a lot of weed on and off (don't do that anymore) and working a dead-end job I fucking hated. I think the difference now is that I'm older and drinking is punishing my body more. The massive nights just absolutely ruin me now. I'm also on antidepressants and I don't think booze mixes well with them. It's like a big come down after a couple of days of drinking.

As for the torture, well, I felt really positive for those first couple of weeks. Healthy, motivated, etc. But then I just wanted to drink again. I was so resentful when the weekend came that I "couldn't" do it. Felt like time was dragging and nothing was very enjoyable. Didn't quite know what to do with myself. Would go skate and then not even want to go home, like there was nothing to look forward to.

The fiance does drink, but not often. She was a big party animal before we met. She's two years older than me and pretty mellow now. She can still hit it when it's called for, but usually doesn't touch the stuff or only has one or two drinks.

I hadn't planned to drink this weekend but I had a super shitty week at work and had a minor meltdown on Friday. I did manage to call it quits after a sixer last night and was in bed at 10.15pm. I was pretty stoked on that and was able to function well today. I'd like to think I can do this moderation thing but I know it's a slippery slope.

Thanks again to everyone who took the time to reply to me, it actually means a lot.

EdLawndale

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #275 on: April 18, 2020, 10:18:02 PM »
Good job on just the sixer
"Was just about to say, wtf is up with this EdLawndale guy?"


Sila

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #276 on: April 18, 2020, 11:02:14 PM »
It's all about the small victories. Hopefully they add up and you can keep up drinking in moderation or cut it entirely if that's what you need.

Abyss1

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #277 on: June 17, 2020, 01:29:47 PM »
 8)

NoComply180

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #278 on: June 17, 2020, 01:51:09 PM »
This quarantine period has made me realize drinking has become my default way of spending time when I’m not working. It feels like it’s been a gradual evolution - weekend partying in college, starting to work Full time and unloading with drinking on weekends again, then testing the waters with weekday drinking after tough days/breakups/adult bullshit, to mid twenties drinking 3-4 nights a week, now late twenties and the last year or two has gone to it being a rare exception that I don’t drink on a given night, and weekends starting in the morning or afternoon after I skate or workout. Now being stuck at home it’s become really obvious to me how this has evolved. Fortunately I’ve laid off the weed because it makes me anxious and this current time period already has me on edge. I’ve been sick the last three days which is really the only reason I’ve felt no need to drink. It’s hard for me to tell when something is a problem or not, since on the outside I’m a fairly high functioning adult.



Him ah fall off building an bumboclot him legs

fuhkin_powahfood_kid

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #279 on: June 17, 2020, 03:07:36 PM »
This quarantine period has made me realize drinking has become my default way of spending time when I’m not working. It feels like it’s been a gradual evolution - weekend partying in college, starting to work Full time and unloading with drinking on weekends again, then testing the waters with weekday drinking after tough days/breakups/adult bullshit, to mid twenties drinking 3-4 nights a week, now late twenties and the last year or two has gone to it being a rare exception that I don’t drink on a given night, and weekends starting in the morning or afternoon after I skate or workout. Now being stuck at home it’s become really obvious to me how this has evolved. Fortunately I’ve laid off the weed because it makes me anxious and this current time period already has me on edge. I’ve been sick the last three days which is really the only reason I’ve felt no need to drink. It’s hard for me to tell when something is a problem or not, since on the outside I’m a fairly high functioning adult.

yo homie. i stopped drinking 3 months and 20 days after i turned 30. I was spending about $200/wk, sometimes more buying booze for home, going out and subsequently buying some flaave to keep up. I got to the point where I couldn't get drunk until blackout. I come from a family where my grandmother had a beer fridge in the basement, my dad has a beer fridge. they're all hard working, functioning people, but everything is a fucking party. Going to the hardware store on saturday is an excuse for a road soda on the way and a stop at the bar on the way home. It's a hard ingrained habit. It's been almost 6 years now without booze and there's no going back.

I'm just saying this because it's really insidious, the way that alcohol can sneak up on you and infiltrate everything you do. I credit a pretty heavy DMT blastoff shortly after I stopped as a turning point in helping me maintain.

If you wanna stop, you've got it.
If you plant ice, you’re gonna harvest wind

NoComply180

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #280 on: June 17, 2020, 03:42:53 PM »
Expand Quote
This quarantine period has made me realize drinking has become my default way of spending time when I’m not working. It feels like it’s been a gradual evolution - weekend partying in college, starting to work Full time and unloading with drinking on weekends again, then testing the waters with weekday drinking after tough days/breakups/adult bullshit, to mid twenties drinking 3-4 nights a week, now late twenties and the last year or two has gone to it being a rare exception that I don’t drink on a given night, and weekends starting in the morning or afternoon after I skate or workout. Now being stuck at home it’s become really obvious to me how this has evolved. Fortunately I’ve laid off the weed because it makes me anxious and this current time period already has me on edge. I’ve been sick the last three days which is really the only reason I’ve felt no need to drink. It’s hard for me to tell when something is a problem or not, since on the outside I’m a fairly high functioning adult.
[close]

yo homie. i stopped drinking 3 months and 20 days after i turned 30. I was spending about $200/wk, sometimes more buying booze for home, going out and subsequently buying some flaave to keep up. I got to the point where I couldn't get drunk until blackout. I come from a family where my grandmother had a beer fridge in the basement, my dad has a beer fridge. they're all hard working, functioning people, but everything is a fucking party. Going to the hardware store on saturday is an excuse for a road soda on the way and a stop at the bar on the way home. It's a hard ingrained habit. It's been almost 6 years now without booze and there's no going back.

I'm just saying this because it's really insidious, the way that alcohol can sneak up on you and infiltrate everything you do. I credit a pretty heavy DMT blastoff shortly after I stopped as a turning point in helping me maintain.

If you wanna stop, you've got it.
thank you my man, I appreciate it. Yeah I realized sometimes even a trip to the liquor store I would have a drink before, then get a single beer or canned cocktail for the walk home with all the other booze in tow too. At this point it seems more like a habit than an addiction, so I’m going to try and change my behavior and daily patterns as opposed to going cold turkey to start. We’ll see.



Him ah fall off building an bumboclot him legs

fuhkin_powahfood_kid

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #281 on: June 17, 2020, 04:06:16 PM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
This quarantine period has made me realize drinking has become my default way of spending time when I’m not working. It feels like it’s been a gradual evolution - weekend partying in college, starting to work Full time and unloading with drinking on weekends again, then testing the waters with weekday drinking after tough days/breakups/adult bullshit, to mid twenties drinking 3-4 nights a week, now late twenties and the last year or two has gone to it being a rare exception that I don’t drink on a given night, and weekends starting in the morning or afternoon after I skate or workout. Now being stuck at home it’s become really obvious to me how this has evolved. Fortunately I’ve laid off the weed because it makes me anxious and this current time period already has me on edge. I’ve been sick the last three days which is really the only reason I’ve felt no need to drink. It’s hard for me to tell when something is a problem or not, since on the outside I’m a fairly high functioning adult.
[close]

yo homie. i stopped drinking 3 months and 20 days after i turned 30. I was spending about $200/wk, sometimes more buying booze for home, going out and subsequently buying some flaave to keep up. I got to the point where I couldn't get drunk until blackout. I come from a family where my grandmother had a beer fridge in the basement, my dad has a beer fridge. they're all hard working, functioning people, but everything is a fucking party. Going to the hardware store on saturday is an excuse for a road soda on the way and a stop at the bar on the way home. It's a hard ingrained habit. It's been almost 6 years now without booze and there's no going back.

I'm just saying this because it's really insidious, the way that alcohol can sneak up on you and infiltrate everything you do. I credit a pretty heavy DMT blastoff shortly after I stopped as a turning point in helping me maintain.

If you wanna stop, you've got it.
[close]
thank you my man, I appreciate it. Yeah I realized sometimes even a trip to the liquor store I would have a drink before, then get a single beer or canned cocktail for the walk home with all the other booze in tow too. At this point it seems more like a habit than an addiction, so I’m going to try and change my behavior and daily patterns as opposed to going cold turkey to start. We’ll see.

the habit is the hardest part. Summer time is still the most challenging for me. I get hit with moments where I think "aah, that's beer drinking time..." do whatcha gotta do, man!
If you plant ice, you’re gonna harvest wind

Abyss1

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #282 on: June 17, 2020, 04:27:25 PM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
This quarantine period has made me realize drinking has become my default way of spending time when I’m not working. It feels like it’s been a gradual evolution - weekend partying in college, starting to work Full time and unloading with drinking on weekends again, then testing the waters with weekday drinking after tough days/breakups/adult bullshit, to mid twenties drinking 3-4 nights a week, now late twenties and the last year or two has gone to it being a rare exception that I don’t drink on a given night, and weekends starting in the morning or afternoon after I skate or workout. Now being stuck at home it’s become really obvious to me how this has evolved. Fortunately I’ve laid off the weed because it makes me anxious and this current time period already has me on edge. I’ve been sick the last three days which is really the only reason I’ve felt no need to drink. It’s hard for me to tell when something is a problem or not, since on the outside I’m a fairly high functioning adult.
[close]

yo homie. i stopped drinking 3 months and 20 days after i turned 30. I was spending about $200/wk, sometimes more buying booze for home, going out and subsequently buying some flaave to keep up. I got to the point where I couldn't get drunk until blackout. I come from a family where my grandmother had a beer fridge in the basement, my dad has a beer fridge. they're all hard working, functioning people, but everything is a fucking party. Going to the hardware store on saturday is an excuse for a road soda on the way and a stop at the bar on the way home. It's a hard ingrained habit. It's been almost 6 years now without booze and there's no going back.

I'm just saying this because it's really insidious, the way that alcohol can sneak up on you and infiltrate everything you do. I credit a pretty heavy DMT blastoff shortly after I stopped as a turning point in helping me maintain.

If you wanna stop, you've got it.
[close]
thank you my man, I appreciate it. Yeah I realized sometimes even a trip to the liquor store I would have a drink before, then get a single beer or canned cocktail for the walk home with all the other booze in tow too. At this point it seems more like a habit than an addiction, so I’m going to try and change my behavior and daily patterns as opposed to going cold turkey to start. We’ll see.
[close]

the habit is the hardest part. Summer time is still the most challenging for me. I get hit with moments where I think "aah, that's beer drinking time..." do whatcha gotta do, man!

Yea that’s what I realized too...so I started creating new good habits only been sober for 6.5 months. I think every time I get bored I think about drinking or even watching a movie, got some jarittos Mexican soda in bottles and it’s been working as a substitute

fuhkin_powahfood_kid

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #283 on: June 17, 2020, 04:34:41 PM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
This quarantine period has made me realize drinking has become my default way of spending time when I’m not working. It feels like it’s been a gradual evolution - weekend partying in college, starting to work Full time and unloading with drinking on weekends again, then testing the waters with weekday drinking after tough days/breakups/adult bullshit, to mid twenties drinking 3-4 nights a week, now late twenties and the last year or two has gone to it being a rare exception that I don’t drink on a given night, and weekends starting in the morning or afternoon after I skate or workout. Now being stuck at home it’s become really obvious to me how this has evolved. Fortunately I’ve laid off the weed because it makes me anxious and this current time period already has me on edge. I’ve been sick the last three days which is really the only reason I’ve felt no need to drink. It’s hard for me to tell when something is a problem or not, since on the outside I’m a fairly high functioning adult.
[close]

yo homie. i stopped drinking 3 months and 20 days after i turned 30. I was spending about $200/wk, sometimes more buying booze for home, going out and subsequently buying some flaave to keep up. I got to the point where I couldn't get drunk until blackout. I come from a family where my grandmother had a beer fridge in the basement, my dad has a beer fridge. they're all hard working, functioning people, but everything is a fucking party. Going to the hardware store on saturday is an excuse for a road soda on the way and a stop at the bar on the way home. It's a hard ingrained habit. It's been almost 6 years now without booze and there's no going back.

I'm just saying this because it's really insidious, the way that alcohol can sneak up on you and infiltrate everything you do. I credit a pretty heavy DMT blastoff shortly after I stopped as a turning point in helping me maintain.

If you wanna stop, you've got it.
[close]
thank you my man, I appreciate it. Yeah I realized sometimes even a trip to the liquor store I would have a drink before, then get a single beer or canned cocktail for the walk home with all the other booze in tow too. At this point it seems more like a habit than an addiction, so I’m going to try and change my behavior and daily patterns as opposed to going cold turkey to start. We’ll see.
[close]

the habit is the hardest part. Summer time is still the most challenging for me. I get hit with moments where I think "aah, that's beer drinking time..." do whatcha gotta do, man!
[close]

Yea that’s what I realized too...so I started creating new good habits only been sober for 6.5 months. I think every time I get bored I think about drinking or even watching a movie, got some jarittos Mexican soda in bottles and it’s been working as a substitute

hell ya man, 6.5 months is a long time when you're used to drinking everyday. I generally stick to water, but i'll go through spurts of drinking Lacroix. If I go to a cookout or something, I literally end up double fisting them to keep my hands occupied.
If you plant ice, you’re gonna harvest wind

theloniousmonk

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #284 on: June 17, 2020, 08:53:07 PM »
I kept hearing about the idea of figuring out the issues that are making you drink, but I never knew what that meant, and I also never thought I had any issues.
One book really helped me sort through my problems that led me to drinking, and it is
Ask And It Is Given
By Esther and Jerry Hicks.
When you read it, you are going to feel positive.
You are all good people and I wish you well.

iKobrakai

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #285 on: June 17, 2020, 09:39:06 PM »
I kept hearing about the idea of figuring out the issues that are making you drink, but I never knew what that meant, and I also never thought I had any issues.
One book really helped me sort through my problems that led me to drinking, and it is
Ask And It Is Given
By Esther and Jerry Hicks.
When you read it, you are going to feel positive.
You are all good people and I wish you well.

By definition, if you're killing yourself with booze there has to be a problem. Regular people stop way before piling up charges, OD's and other shit.

50mm

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #286 on: June 17, 2020, 10:42:20 PM »
Today marks a month without smoking. I always make it a month or several then get bored and smoke and I’m back to square one of being a total fucking burnout lazy fuck. Weed is terrible for me. I already lack motivation to do anything so when I smoke I pretty much just sit on the sidelines as life passes me by. This time though, I wasn’t hiding I was smoking or that I was quitting or that I needed support from my girlfriend. She’s the shit and is very much understanding that I’m an adult and can do what I want, doesn’t tell me to stop but will be on my ass making sure I’m not smoking if I ask her to be, which I did. When I smoke vs when I don’t is night and day personality wise and just being able to do basic shit like my job. I wish I could moderate like most but for some reason weed is the only substance that has really had a negative impact on my life and for myself personally is crazy addictive. Shalom. 

funeral_tuxedo

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #287 on: June 18, 2020, 09:51:31 AM »
Flying Rodent and NoComply 180,
I've been sober for close to ten years. It was incredibly difficult for me to stop using drugs and alcohol and I needed a lot of help from other people (I still do) and that was almost as terrifying as the idea of getting through the days without substances. Please feel free to message me if you want to ask me any questions about recovery. I'm not any kind of authority on anything but I can definitely share what resources worked for me or I can just listen. No judgement.
PS this is a dope thread.

NoComply180

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #288 on: June 18, 2020, 09:54:52 AM »
Flying Rodent and NoComply 180,
I've been sober for close to ten years. It was incredibly difficult for me to stop using drugs and alcohol and I needed a lot of help from other people (I still do) and that was almost as terrifying as the idea of getting through the days without substances. Please feel free to message me if you want to ask me any questions about recovery. I'm not any kind of authority on anything but I can definitely share what resources worked for me or I can just listen. No judgement.
PS this is a dope thread.
thank you, that means a lot. Yeah I can’t imagine asking real people in my life for help, or even just letting them know that I have problem. If I even do. Writing about it on an anonymous skateboarding forum was hard enough.



Him ah fall off building an bumboclot him legs

peptobismol

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #289 on: August 02, 2020, 03:15:02 PM »
i am struggling with alcohol and am trying to slow it down, yet i somehow find myself drinking every single night until i either pass out or run out of alcohol. i recently rolled my ankle(skating while high) so now i feel like now i have nothing else to do other than drink. i have been able to get my weed consumption down and eventually i plan on phasing it out completely, however the alcohol seems to be much more difficult to kick. i am a recovering addict to begin with, having been hooked on opiates but i managed to kick that habit. that was 11 years ago. i also had a love affair with cocaine but i managed to kick that, too. the alcohol, i think because it is so widely accepted in society, it makes it much more difficult to stop. for the past month or so, i have had a lot of trouble keeping alcohol down and it has been making me gag so i know that my body is rejecting it but i still drink, regardless. i also have been having panic attacks much like how marc johnson described in some interview where he was struggling with alcohol and then had an onset panic attack where the lingering feeling of imminent doom was right around the corner. i do not have any DUIs nor do i plan on getting any. i have had many close calls, though.

tl;dr
i dont have any questions, really just venting i guess.

Dracula

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #290 on: August 02, 2020, 08:39:25 PM »
I turned into a huge pile when quarantine started and was drinking almost every night. Last month I joined my friend on only drinking on weekends and thankfully it’s been pretty easy. I just drink a shit ton of sparking waters during the week

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #291 on: August 02, 2020, 09:27:54 PM »
i am struggling with alcohol and am trying to slow it down, yet i somehow find myself drinking every single night until i either pass out or run out of alcohol. i recently rolled my ankle(skating while high) so now i feel like now i have nothing else to do other than drink. i have been able to get my weed consumption down and eventually i plan on phasing it out completely, however the alcohol seems to be much more difficult to kick. i am a recovering addict to begin with, having been hooked on opiates but i managed to kick that habit. that was 11 years ago. i also had a love affair with cocaine but i managed to kick that, too. the alcohol, i think because it is so widely accepted in society, it makes it much more difficult to stop. for the past month or so, i have had a lot of trouble keeping alcohol down and it has been making me gag so i know that my body is rejecting it but i still drink, regardless. i also have been having panic attacks much like how marc johnson described in some interview where he was struggling with alcohol and then had an onset panic attack where the lingering feeling of imminent doom was right around the corner. i do not have any DUIs nor do i plan on getting any. i have had many close calls, though.

tl;dr
i dont have any questions, really just venting i guess.

yo homie, even though you don't have questions, I'm gonna say that it's a hard road to hoe. You kicked opes, you're off the blow- so you can do it.
 I hope the panic attacks get better. Shit sucks. Do yourself a solid and stay the fuck away from benzos. that will be the worst to kick, hands down. If you have a doctor, ask about clonidine and/or hydroxyzine. They're non narcotic, don't get you high, and are respectively blood pressure and antihistamine medications that can be used to kick heavy benzo issues but are also really, really effective for panic attacks if you don't want to go the benzo route. Over the past 2 months I have taken ashwaganda supplement every day and my stress/anxiety levels are the best they've been in a long while. Ashwaganda is an adaptogen, meaning it builds up over time to help you adrenal system return to baseline. Gaia brand makes a really quality product.
If you plant ice, you’re gonna harvest wind

AlexOlsonsDashiki

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #292 on: August 03, 2020, 07:37:45 AM »
If anyone is struggling with alcohol or drug use please send me a PM. I am always open to listen. I have been sober for 2 and a half years. 

I recently found my old Slap account and through the posts I saw what I looked like when I was fucked up and jesus christ was it abysmal.

I do AA although I have a problem with crack and heroin as well. Im not here to convince anyone they need AA or a 12 step program, I am just happy to listen. Please reach out.
Every time the McRib comes out I buy it. I don't even like the damn things.

AlexOlsonsDashiki

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #293 on: August 03, 2020, 07:41:09 AM »
also to the people questioning if AA will laugh at you for only drinking on the weekends, the answer is no.

"the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking"
Every time the McRib comes out I buy it. I don't even like the damn things.

brycickle

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #294 on: August 07, 2020, 01:51:39 PM »

 You and the D00D have turned this thread into a horrible head-on-collision between a short bus full of regular kids and a van full of paraplegics.



peptobismol

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #295 on: August 15, 2020, 02:05:15 PM »
an unsolicited update:
havent slowed down with alcohol but at least it doesnt make me gag anymore.....at the present moment. ive been off weed for a few days and i havent had any panic attacks since, that might have been the cause. still cant skate, though. i tried rolling around in the garage on my mickey mouse board yesterday(see set-up thread & worst set up thread), hit a twig and it agitated my ankle so thats a bummer. ive been trying to strengthen my core and ankle in between beers as well as smashing through duolingo so at least thats a plus.
not really interested in talking directly to pals, im tired of hearing the same generic stuff. no offense or anything and i do appreciate those reaching out but all that i want is to put my thoughts out and throw it into the internet abyss.

and no, i have not been driving while drunk. i like to practice good harm reduction.

drewsmahgoos

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #296 on: October 20, 2020, 04:31:22 AM »
don't really know where else to ask as one of my only friends is right next to me going through the same shit. I got hooked on fent. I'm not proud of it. Honestly totally ashamed. I lived a junky's dream for the last year. No work, no responsibilities or bills. Just blasted through all the money I have and my best friend has. Sold everything I could easily sell. Now I'm broke and kicking. I spent over 30k this year on drugs alone. Fent WD's are the worst thing I've ever experienced. I'm just happy I'm not kicking in prison or something. Anyway, can someone reach out and just chat with me? I'm really genuinely trying not to go out and use again. Doing everything I can including throwing out my dignity by reaching out to people on here.

Telly

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #297 on: October 20, 2020, 05:46:55 AM »
don't really know where else to ask as one of my only friends is right next to me going through the same shit. I got hooked on fent. I'm not proud of it. Honestly totally ashamed. I lived a junky's dream for the last year. No work, no responsibilities or bills. Just blasted through all the money I have and my best friend has. Sold everything I could easily sell. Now I'm broke and kicking. I spent over 30k this year on drugs alone. Fent WD's are the worst thing I've ever experienced. I'm just happy I'm not kicking in prison or something. Anyway, can someone reach out and just chat with me? I'm really genuinely trying not to go out and use again. Doing everything I can including throwing out my dignity by reaching out to people on here.

I’m at work for the next 8 hours but can chat via pm until then and can talk after if you need someone.

Sleazy

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #298 on: October 20, 2020, 06:14:18 AM »
haven't posted in ages. i've been off and on again with my program of drinking mostly on the weekends. didn't drink last night which felt good and usually once i get one day started during a week i make it too the weekend without drinking.

Today marks a month without smoking. I always make it a month or several then get bored and smoke and I’m back to square one of being a total fucking burnout lazy fuck. Weed is terrible for me. I already lack motivation to do anything so when I smoke I pretty much just sit on the sidelines as life passes me by. This time though, I wasn’t hiding I was smoking or that I was quitting or that I needed support from my girlfriend. She’s the shit and is very much understanding that I’m an adult and can do what I want, doesn’t tell me to stop but will be on my ass making sure I’m not smoking if I ask her to be, which I did. When I smoke vs when I don’t is night and day personality wise and just being able to do basic shit like my job. I wish I could moderate like most but for some reason weed is the only substance that has really had a negative impact on my life and for myself personally is crazy addictive. Shalom.

50mm i can share that for me weed was crazy addictive and really holding me back a ton. it was so hard to quit about 7 years back but i don't look back at all now. it was making me anti-social, a bit grouchy and had me hitting way below my potential when it came to getting shit done. i'd encourage you to keep pushing. if you feel it's a problem and you've got a good girl you are set for success.

note i smoke a cigar now and then to get a mellow fade and it scratches that same itch. on the weekends i'll put a show on my ipod and smoke a nice cigar to mellow out a bit.




drewsmahgoos

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Re: SOBRIETY
« Reply #299 on: October 20, 2020, 06:28:46 AM »
Expand Quote
don't really know where else to ask as one of my only friends is right next to me going through the same shit. I got hooked on fent. I'm not proud of it. Honestly totally ashamed. I lived a junky's dream for the last year. No work, no responsibilities or bills. Just blasted through all the money I have and my best friend has. Sold everything I could easily sell. Now I'm broke and kicking. I spent over 30k this year on drugs alone. Fent WD's are the worst thing I've ever experienced. I'm just happy I'm not kicking in prison or something. Anyway, can someone reach out and just chat with me? I'm really genuinely trying not to go out and use again. Doing everything I can including throwing out my dignity by reaching out to people on here.
[close]

I’m at work for the next 8 hours but can chat via pm until then and can talk after if you need someone.

That seriously helps dude, I need all the help I can get right now and I really appreciate it.