SOBRIETY

[ralf_]

i read this a bunch the last few days

https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/alcoholics-autonomous-anarchy-and-alcohol

i thought for a long time: hey, i am only taking a break, when spring hits, what will be better, than having a cold beer? now even the thought of beer disgusts me, the liquid and also, the feeling. suddenly i see, how much shit there is to do, how much energy people (or i!) have… like, i love reading and writing, but theres only so much shit i can read or write before i have to eat, sleep, take a walk, and thats okay. no need to lessen the amount of time i have any more. suddenly feels like i am taking my life in my own hands. and boy, is it hard. but better than being unchallenged right? would be boring :-)

[ToshiroTownune]

I wanted to address weed withdrawals. For heavy smokers, there's a fairly high chance you will encounter PAWS, Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. The first time I experienced this I had no idea what was going on and my body's reactions freaked me out. Eventually I found the Leaves community on reddit and discovered a bunch of people going through the same stuff.

The most common symptoms are nausea, lack of appetite, brain fog, anxiety, anhedonia, insomnia, stomach issues (gas of all kinds, diarrhea or conversely constipation, shitting mucus), and muscle twitching, among others. I only fucked with flower, but for those into vapes their symptoms seem to be the worst. On average it appears that the symptoms clear up within about three weeks, although there are others that are worse and less than that. Every time I've quit it's around 21-28 days that all of a sudden my thinking starts to get much clearer and I have a ton of excess energy.

I miss all the insights that weed gave me and how it seemed to allow subconscious thoughts to surface more often and easily, but after a while all the fun and enjoyment of it wore off and I was left with feeling I had to do it to function. I'm now on three and a half weeks off (third time quitting) and things are finally start to be getting back to normal. Good luck to all the sober slap pals and keep going! It really is better on the other side.

[AlexOlsonsDashiki]

5 years today

[sle_epy]

5 years today

🥳🥳🥳 Yay!

[woodsman]

I got 2 years no opiates and 8 months no alcohol. I haven't posted in awhile but I was in big trouble with heroin and I somehow got it together with Suboxone and a couple of phenomenal therapists.

[IUTSM]

@AlexOlsonsDashiki

5 years is huge. Keep it going my friend

I got 2 years no opiates and 8 months no alcohol. I haven't posted in awhile but I was in big trouble with heroin and I somehow got it together with Suboxone and a couple of phenomenal therapists.

Fuck dope! None of the dope or pills are “real” anyways. Stick with your subs too man, i got a homie thats been taking a 1/4 strip for years, as he says to “keep the edge off and keep me honest.” Good for you

[sle_epy]

@AlexOlsonsDashiki

5 years is huge. Keep it going my friend

Expand Quote

I got 2 years no opiates and 8 months no alcohol. I haven't posted in awhile but I was in big trouble with heroin and I somehow got it together with Suboxone and a couple of phenomenal therapists.

[close]

Fuck dope! None of the dope or pills are “real” anyways. Stick with your subs too man, i got a homie thats been taking a 1/4 strip for years, as he says to “keep the edge off and keep me honest.” Good for you

Def think there's a weird chip ppl get on their shoulders about "cheating" or whatever when choosing the lesser evil in order to function as best as you can. Like calling people Cali sober or whatever when used as a slight. That's lame, if pot works as a substitute to alcohol and you can keep it way more together and not be a disaster there's no shame in that at all. Same with Suboxone or any other substitute.

[Coastal Fever]

First off, maaaassive props to all you guys for a) being here, and b) the time you’ve got under your belts.  Full sobriety has always been too daunting for me to take on.  I’ve taken breaks from either weed or alcohol countless times in my adult life, but never both at the same time. 

Sadly, it’s taken my fiancé telling me it’s over to get serious.  There’s still hope it’ll work out, but honestly, that’s besides the point and irrelevant to what I need to do for myself.  I cannot continue to smoke and drink regularly, without being an ugly, confused person.

I’ve always felt much better when I quit weed and just have a few occasional beers or vice versa, but I’ve never allowed myself to stop both and let my dopamine level itself out fully.  I’ve been listening to podcasts about addiction and learning a lot.  I also plan to get therapy, even just one or two sessions, depending on the cost, to really help me understand why I keep getting addicted to the same shit, and how to overcome it.

That’s a lot of words to say not much, but I guess that’s what this thread is for.  Hopefully I can share a success story in the future, but for now I’m happy to read all of yours and be inspired by them.

[ralf_]

First off, maaaassive props to all you guys for a) being here, and b) the time you’ve got under your belts.  Full sobriety has always been too daunting for me to take on.  I’ve taken breaks from either weed or alcohol countless times in my adult life, but never both at the same time. 

Sadly, it’s taken my fiancé telling me it’s over to get serious.  There’s still hope it’ll work out, but honestly, that’s besides the point and irrelevant to what I need to do for myself.  I cannot continue to smoke and drink regularly, without being an ugly, confused person.

I’ve always felt much better when I quit weed and just have a few occasional beers or vice versa, but I’ve never allowed myself to stop both and let my dopamine level itself out fully.  I’ve been listening to podcasts about addiction and learning a lot.  I also plan to get therapy, even just one or two sessions, depending on the cost, to really help me understand why I keep getting addicted to the same shit, and how to overcome it.

That’s a lot of words to say not much, but I guess that’s what this thread is for.  Hopefully I can share a success story in the future, but for now I’m happy to read all of yours and be inspired by them.

you're welcome g! sucks about your fiancé, but at least now you seem to be motivated to change something. glad you're here!

[Jim and Dan]

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@AlexOlsonsDashiki

5 years is huge. Keep it going my friend

Expand Quote

I got 2 years no opiates and 8 months no alcohol. I haven't posted in awhile but I was in big trouble with heroin and I somehow got it together with Suboxone and a couple of phenomenal therapists.

[close]

Fuck dope! None of the dope or pills are “real” anyways. Stick with your subs too man, i got a homie thats been taking a 1/4 strip for years, as he says to “keep the edge off and keep me honest.” Good for you

[close]

Def think there's a weird chip ppl get on their shoulders about "cheating" or whatever when choosing the lesser evil in order to function as best as you can. Like calling people Cali sober or whatever when used as a slight. That's lame, if pot works as a substitute to alcohol and you can keep it way more together and not be a disaster there's no shame in that at all. Same with Suboxone or any other substitute.

Most of the time the people who express concern over being on Suboxone for prolonged periods of times fall into 2 categories:

a.) People who have no experience with actually being an addict of any kind, especially opiates
b.) Self-righteous assholes who want to push their agenda onto you even in-spite of it not being in your best interest.

I've been on Suboxone for 5 years now (albeit at a low dose now) and to be honest, I wouldn't have traded my decision for any other at this point and the program that I've been in since the beginning has been transformative, I'm 100% certain that I would not be alive without the support I received from a reputable and caring clinical network. Of course I wanted to get clean, it was hard to accept that I didn't want to ask for help and felt that I could just "man up" and white-knuckle it until I got there. What I see now is that I didn't know how to function in life without several forms of substance abuse, being that I started smoking weed at like 15, painkillers at 16 and never looked back, being a full-blown addict by the age of 19 (I'm 34 now). If anyone feels like that's what they need to get out of that lifestyle and stay out of it, by all means do it and don't let anyone pressure you into coming off if you're not ready, a reputable clinician (I can't stress that enough, there are a lot of places that are cash grabs in the big business of "rehabilitation") will help you when you're ready to take that step. I've been off heroin for over 6 years now and will be coming up on 5 years in 2 weeks from the one slip-up I had involving crack-cocaine on 4/30/2018. I never thought in my wildest and darkest times that I would ever make it this far and not have even an inkling to go back to that lifestyle, even when I'm emotionally unstable and things aren't okay. Congratulations on the work you've done, it does get better with time but one thing I wholeheartedly recommend is that you identify the issues that brought you down that path, either with yourself, a confidant or a therapist and you work on trying to correct those issues. Once the first 3-4 years passed, I noticed I was left with the same issues that I had before I started down the road and it was very eye-opening, something that I still struggle with to this day and continue to work on diligently. I hope to make some seriously big changes in my life that will help alleviate a lot of the issues I'm currently facing and working towards the goals that I've set in order to live a much more fulfilling life.

"Godspeed little doodle, Godspeed"...
-Ned Flanders

[Coastal Fever]

Today is day 5.  There was a work party at the office tonight for one of the bosses’ retirement.  I went out of respect and expecting it to be pretty mellow, but when I got there everyone was already extremely turnt.  Booze, weed, etc.  I had a ginger ale, hung around for an hour and made conversation with everyone, then said my goodbyes as they raged on.  It wasn’t hard to abstain in the moment, but driving home I felt very, I dunno, raw?  It was definitely a bittersweet feeling, but I’m proud of myself.

[Easy Slider]

Today is day 5.  There was a work party at the office tonight for one of the bosses’ retirement.  I went out of respect and expecting it to be pretty mellow, but when I got there everyone was already extremely turnt.  Booze, weed, etc.  I had a ginger ale, hung around for an hour and made conversation with everyone, then said my goodbyes as they raged on.  It wasn’t hard to abstain in the moment, but driving home I felt very, I dunno, raw?  It was definitely a bittersweet feeling, but I’m proud of myself.

Great achievement bro. It will always feel weird to be around dudes that drink/get drunk. It‘s only when you don‘t drink that you realize how our culture is based around getting hammered all the time and how the purpose of many „social“ functions is really just to get pissed. It‘s an eye opener for sure.

[chuckles]

Never was too crazy with it but as a bartender I'd easily have 2 beers at the end of my shifts. Thought I'd try to take a month off back in July and it's been 9 months now. I don't know how much different I feel but I get the bar closed down a lot faster now.

[fineslime]

Never was too crazy with it but as a bartender I'd easily have 2 beers at the end of my shifts. Thought I'd try to take a month off back in July and it's been 9 months now. I don't know how much different I feel but I get the bar closed down a lot faster now.

This has always been one of my reasons to stay out of the hospitality industry (I've been a bartender and server off and on for 10+ years.) It's far too easy to get sucked into having drinks with your coworkers after a busy Friday or Saturday night, or any night for that matter.

I recently got into a killer restaurant in a busy part of my town and I'm very grateful to say I haven't fallen back into that trap. Only a few of my coworkers drink, and if they do they have one after work at a bar across the street and then they're out. I've respectfully turned down the invite more times than I've accepted it. Plus, you're not burning through the money you just worked your ass off to make.

[wilog]

Its been 3 days since ive last smoked weed after doing it every day for the last year and a half because i dont really get high for more than 30 minutes anymore if i even do, which i dont more often than not. I dont want to quit forever but I think i have to break the habit of it because i cant stop eventhough I dont get high anymore and theres no purpose of doing it at this point. Anyone thats had a simlair experience, did you fully quit or just start to do it less frequently and how did that go. 

[IUTSM]

Its been 3 days since ive last smoked weed after doing it every day for the last year and a half because i dont really get high for more than 30 minutes anymore if i even do, which i dont more often than not. I dont want to quit forever but I think i have to break the habit of it because i cant stop eventhough I dont get high anymore and theres no purpose of doing it at this point. Anyone thats had a simlair experience, did you fully quit or just start to do it less frequently and how did that go.

There was a point, when i was like 23 that smoking weed all the time just wasnt the same anymore and i was pretty much only doing it outta habit/identity. Was smoking like a box of phillies or a pack of woods a day and was between brain dead and lost in my head with anxiety all the time. So i just stopped. I had to find other shit to do so i started drinking and doing other stuff instead ha ha ha

Joking aside, weed has been a constant in my life in one way or another for 23 or so years. Sometimes i engage with daily for months on end, other times i just dont want/need any in my system. You might be bored but youre not gonna get sick or true/dangerous withdrawals like you do with booze/benzos/opioid drugs.

If you wanna go the taper route for the sake of doing it and what not, chances are you can mess with cbd or something for a while, edibles, buds, tinctures, suppositories etc

You’ll be ok

[ToshiroTownune]

Its been 3 days since ive last smoked weed after doing it every day for the last year and a half because i dont really get high for more than 30 minutes anymore if i even do, which i dont more often than not. I dont want to quit forever but I think i have to break the habit of it because i cant stop eventhough I dont get high anymore and theres no purpose of doing it at this point. Anyone thats had a simlair experience, did you fully quit or just start to do it less frequently and how did that go.

Everyone's body responds differently, but having smoked a lot and quit many times, I've gone through intense insomnia that lasted almost three weeks, two weeks of no appetite, crazy sweating, intense feelings of anhedonia (inability to experience joy), depression, low energy, brain fog, and involuntary muscle twitching.

If you want to get a sense of what to expect and what others have endured, I recommend spending some time on the leaves community https://www.reddit.com/r/leaves/

If you're three days in and not experiencing anything, then it sounds like your withdrawals will be mild to nonexistent. The initial two weeks is always the worst, especially the first week. Good luck.

[Frank and Fred]

I've had three beers since Xmas 2022. Sobriety was not necessarily my plan. I went back home to the UK last month and wanted to sample some old favorites but I learned I might be losing my taste for beer. Then I got injured and really don't want to drink while I'm healing.

It's a funny old journey.

[Ricky Vaughn]

I've tried it a few times, not for me

[Mr. Kamikazi]

1 year next month. Just NA beers for me when I’m in the mood. Life is better, I don’t have as much anxiety, I’m able to think clearly & not be stuck with OCD symptoms all day, all of which drinking exacerbates. I believe it is safe to say. I will never touch alcohol again. Not interested. Plus I am on a low dosage of anxiety medication, which is another form of motivation.

[Coastal Fever]

That’s awesome man, congrats!  I’ll be at 1 month this weekend, and agree completely with what you said about less anxiety/more clarity.  I’ve been through the wringer these past few weeks with car/house/work issues, and I feel like I’ve been handling everything like a champ and getting tons of shit done.  Whereas if I was still trudging through my days waiting for that evening beer/toke, I’d have broken down multiple times.

[IUTSM]

@Coastal Fever @mrkamikaze

Big ups fellas. Big ups

I have found that i have accomplished far more in the past 8ish years without drinking than the 12 that i was a regular heavy drinker. One of my mentors in life had said to me about why he quit drinking at 30, while i was still drinking, that “if i didn’t quit drinking I would  never have done anything.” I cant reiterate just how true that has been for me.

Alcohol made nothing better… i mean shitty situations seemed more tolerable, but thats it. Alcohol made me ok about mediocrity and feeling poorly. Numbed out feeling deeply. Anyways, thats my take on it for today.

Love to you dudes. Love yourselves

[Mr. Kamikazi]

@Coastal Fever @mrkamikaze

Big ups fellas. Big ups

I have found that i have accomplished far more in the past 8ish years without drinking than the 12 that i was a regular heavy drinker. One of my mentors in life had said to me about why he quit drinking at 30, while i was still drinking, that “if i didn’t quit drinking I would  never have done anything.” I cant reiterate just how true that has been for me.

Alcohol made nothing better… i mean shitty situations seemed more tolerable, but thats it. Alcohol made me ok about mediocrity and feeling poorly. Numbed out feeling deeply. Anyways, thats my take on it for today.

Love to you dudes. Love yourselves

Well said & appreciated. Love to us talking about this & sharing our victories. It matters. We matter.

[Mr. Kamikazi]

That’s awesome man, congrats!  I’ll be at 1 month this weekend, and agree completely with what you said about less anxiety/more clarity.  I’ve been through the wringer these past few weeks with car/house/work issues, and I feel like I’ve been handling everything like a champ and getting tons of shit done.  Whereas if I was still trudging through my days waiting for that evening beer/toke, I’d have broken down multiple times.

Congrats on one month! That’s huge & I hope you know that. It rules that you’re reflective which I can say hardly happened even drinking. Here if you need to chat!

Mass Love

[IUTSM]

I found this aptly stated

[Space Cowboy]

I found this aptly stated

Thats a great line, thank you for sharing I needed that

[IUTSM]

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I found this aptly stated

[close]

Thats a great line, thank you for sharing I needed that

Vonnegut is good…

[Easy Slider]

I often think of this photo from the Upfront backcover when tempted.

[Coastal Fever]

I’ll delete this if anyone finds it triggering, but after a few weeks of not even having non-alcoholic beer, I picked up a sixer of Bud Zero and I fucking loved it.  Which is funny because I was strictly a juicy IPA guy while boozing, and I find most na beers disgusting, but this one reeeally hits the spot on a hot day. 

Thankfully, I didn’t miss the buzz aspect at all, I just truly enjoyed the taste a lot.  I’m a little nervous that I’m unwittingly leading myself back down a slippery slope towards the real thing.. but I love being sober, so I’d like to think that I’ve actually just found a healthier replacement, that provides the same refreshment I used to seek from drinking.

*this post was not in any way paid for or supported by Budweiser Zero, 0.0% alcohol beer.

[IUTSM]

I’ll delete this if anyone finds it triggering, but after a few weeks of not even having non-alcoholic beer, I picked up a sixer of Bud Zero and I fucking loved it.  Which is funny because I was strictly a juicy IPA guy while boozing, and I find most na beers disgusting, but this one reeeally hits the spot on a hot day. 

Thankfully, I didn’t miss the buzz aspect at all, I just truly enjoyed the taste a lot.  I’m a little nervous that I’m unwittingly leading myself back down a slippery slope towards the real thing.. but I love being sober, so I’d like to think that I’ve actually just found a healthier replacement, that provides the same refreshment I used to seek from drinking.

*this post was not in any way paid for or supported by Budweiser Zero, 0.0% alcohol beer.

See the one time i grabbed the wrong can i got a mouthful of BL and it was naaaaaasty.

Went out last winter and ordered a lagunitas non alcohol, thinking it was hop water. Nope it was a no alcohol IPA. The smell alone sent me on a spiral of memories and feelings. Literally watched 15 years of alcohol abuse unfurl in 30 seconds. Never experienced something like that outside psychedelics. The server took it back after i explained my sobriety and brought me grape juice.