Author Topic: SOBRIETY (Read 48717 times)

fineslime · « **Reply #540 on:** June 24, 2023, 08:32:59 AM »

Quote from: EdLawndale on June 24, 2023, 01:04:13 AM

Yes, good job, breezy_again and fineslime. I am at about 4 weeks no alcohol. It's also kind of forced while I sort some things out, but I found it most difficult the first two weeks. Going out is definitely a lot cheaper! I went out to the pub tonight and just had waters with my food. Keep it up, guys!

damn Mr. Lawndale, going to a pub this early on is a ballsy move! did you feel like you had to do it to test yourself? thats amazing that you were able to be in that environment and still stand strong in your choices. how do you feel having accomplished that? I have not yet been in a bar setting other than the restaurant I work in. I also avoided my family's summer kick off party a few weeks ago because I knew there would be alcohol there. they even had a water slide bounce house!!!

EdLawndale · « **Reply #541 on:** June 24, 2023, 10:09:42 AM »

For me, the danger is open bars (corporate events, movie premieres, weddings, etc.). So, I try to limit my time at those. I've had a lot of bad experiences with just endless alcohol being handed to me for free with no accountability. It's even worse when I don't have to worry about driving home. Not to say it wasn't my own fault all those times. It was.

Last night, I just wanted to say hi to my friends and do some work on my laptop over a meal, so it wasn't that troublesome. Thankfully, nobody pressures me to drink, and paying for the food allows me to take care of the wait staff I've known for years and not feel like I'm being a freeloader.

Sorry to hear you missed your family's event but there will be many more in the future, I am sure. Think about how proud you will be of yourself when you realize you have the confidence to stay in control and not feel like you have to drink anything. It's pretty cool actually. You'll get there real soon.

IUTSM · « **Reply #542 on:** June 24, 2023, 10:32:32 AM »

@EdLawndale

Very cool, dude. I imagine your work environment and stressors can encourage indiscriminate alcohol consumption, so right on.

Idk · « **Reply #543 on:** June 27, 2023, 12:50:48 PM »

Today is hopefully day one of sobriety. The biggest hurdle is sleeping. I’ve been an insomniac even before I started smoking weed and probably one of the reasons I got so into it because it helped me sleep. Especially since I’m going through a break up the depression is gonna make it hard to sleep tonight.

Jebediah · « **Reply #544 on:** June 27, 2023, 12:51:45 PM »

I've stopped weed and insomnia has been killer as well. Maybe try a small dose of melatonin a few hours before bedtime.

Coastal Fever · « **Reply #545 on:** June 27, 2023, 06:52:04 PM »

I take 5mg melatonin, along with a magnesium supplement, and valerian tea every night before bed. I sleep like a baby most of the time. There’s no health consequences and it’s not like they’re drugs that leave you groggy the next day. If taking some natural sleep aids helps you kick unhealthy vices, you shouldn’t even think twice.

IUTSM · « **Reply #546 on:** June 27, 2023, 07:02:14 PM »

Quote from: Idk on June 27, 2023, 12:50:48 PM

Today is hopefully day one of sobriety. The biggest hurdle is sleeping. I’ve been an insomniac even before I started smoking weed and probably one of the reasons I got so into it because it helped me sleep. Especially since I’m going through a break up the depression is gonna make it hard to sleep tonight.

Valerian or passiaflora do the job of weed for insomnia.

Look on ebay for a product called formula 303. Chiropractic firms sell it as a muscle relaxant. I realize eBay may seem sketch, but its right from the manufacturer in TN. Top notch sleep aide that wont get you fucked up

Idk · « **Reply #547 on:** June 27, 2023, 10:01:10 PM »

Thank you both. I am here on my couch unable to sleep even after an ambien my mom gave me to try to help me sleep. I’ll look into the formula 303. Muscle relaxers do make me drowsy so maybe these will help.

Idk · « **Reply #548 on:** June 28, 2023, 05:53:46 AM »

Day 2 of treatment. Fell asleep around 3 last night but didn’t use weed or alcohol the whole day. Hopefully by tomorrow I’ll have 48 hours which I’ve never done at home in 10 years. The only times I’ve been sober in the last 10 years was when I was out of state and unable to buy weed. But even then I would drink to help me sleep. This is probably the hardest thing I have done in my life. I wish I could say I’ve done harder more fascinating things but that’s why I’m doing this now. So that one day my life is filled with challenges and obstacles and I choose to overcome them instead of retreating to drugs and alcohol and women.

breezy_again · « **Reply #549 on:** June 28, 2023, 06:08:57 AM »

benedryl is good for helping you sleep. its actually the same dose of the same drug as a unisom sleep gel. i believe it does show up as alcohol on a pee test though.
i'm gonna look into some of these other options myself as my sleep is kind of fucked at the moment. the medication i'm on makes me have crazy lucid dreams which has started to become annoying.

Idk · « **Reply #550 on:** June 28, 2023, 06:54:28 AM »

Quote from: breezy_again on June 28, 2023, 06:08:57 AM

benedryl is good for helping you sleep. its actually the same dose of the same drug as a unisom sleep gel. i believe it does show up as alcohol on a pee test though.
i'm gonna look into some of these other options myself as my sleep is kind of fucked at the moment. the medication i'm on makes me have crazy lucid dreams which has started to become annoying.

I had to sign an agreement to be 100% sober during this day treatment and Benadryl was one of the things I can’t take. NyQuil as well. My mom bought me some cbd gummies to help me sleep and today they may give me non addictive pills to help with sleep. My pee tests will show up positive for thc the whole time I’m here they said but they can send it to a lab to get levels to see if I’m truly being sober. Which I have. It’s been very hard.

breezy_again · « **Reply #551 on:** June 28, 2023, 10:00:08 AM »

You got this!

Idk · « **Reply #552 on:** June 28, 2023, 10:31:23 AM »

Quote from: breezy_again on June 28, 2023, 10:00:08 AM

You got this!

Thank you. Lots of stuff happening these last few days. The psychiatrist diagnosed me with bipolar type 1. Makes sense though to me

Easy Slider · « **Reply #553 on:** June 28, 2023, 12:00:06 PM »

@Idk and @breezy_again I got no advice for you on the sleeping front but just wanted to encourage you to stay strong. Eventually the body will adjust to the new way of life, after all it was used to being drugged for many years so this will take a while. In the end it's good for you and you know it. You got this lads!

BurgerCop · « **Reply #554 on:** June 28, 2023, 12:24:02 PM »

I have an issue with binge drinking lately. I lost my dad and brother within 2 weeks of each other back in April. I don't feel like I'm drinking to cope with loss, but this wasn't an issue before so maybe it's related.
I can still go days without a drop of alcohol and not give it a second thought, but it's like the second one drop touches my lips I immediately go into binge mode.
I'll buy a 12 pack to "last me the weekend" and drink it all in 5 hours on Friday afternoon/evening.
I tried only buying 6 packs of 12oz cans thinking once it's gone I'm done for the night, but on more than one occasion I found myself walking down to the gas station to buy more beer as soon as the sixer is gone.

Having said all that, I still only drink about 2 days a week, sometimes 3. I typically don't drink at all Monday through Thursday. I really want to get back to my usual, more moderated alcohol consumption, but I'm also scared I'm losing control.
I think I'm going to have to quit entirely for a bit while I still have the restraint to do so, if I keep going down this road I'm terrified of where it could lead.

I guess I'm not really looking for advice, I know what I need to do (quit).
It just feels kinda therapeutic to type this out and get it off my chest.

EdLawndale · « **Reply #555 on:** June 28, 2023, 01:39:52 PM »

The only time I got sent in an ambulance to the the ER for alcohol poisoning was at the end of a night binge drinking a few months after the death of my father (had already lost my mother about a decade earlier).

In response, I took six months of drinking (and three months of marijuana). After the six months, I basically eased back into drinking but had to reteach myself not to binge drink, because that was all I knew as I grew up doing it.

I have not found myself in a similar situation during the roughly 10 years since taking that six months of alcohol.

That was my bottom. Thankfully, I didn't get behind the wheel and kill anyone, but the whole event ended up costing me thousands of dollars (hospital fees, lost wallet, phone, car keys, etc.) but I realized I did not enjoy the feeling of blacking out and trying to piece together the previous night when I wake up with a major hangover and no recollection of what happened or how I conducted myself. I prefer staying in control.

Hopefully, you may be able to avoid going through a similar experience. Good luck, man.

BurgerCop · « **Reply #556 on:** June 28, 2023, 02:16:39 PM »

I appreciate that.
That's the crazy thing, anytime I drink way too much I always feel ashamed the next morning no matter how the night went. But lately I've been doing my binge drinking at home, alone. That part scares me too.
Thankfully I'm good at staying away from my phone and computer so far, heh.

I think I'll give your 6 month plan a try, that sounds about up my alley.
Sucks to have to start it when summer is just kicking off, but the booze isn't gonna wait until it's convenient for me, and hey, 4th of July will be a good last hurrah before going off the wagon...or on the wagon...I can't remember which means "doesn't drink"...

Coastal Fever · « **Reply #557 on:** June 29, 2023, 02:50:21 AM »

The only thing I’d warn against a 6 month plans is that can be a daunting and discouraging length of time. Not saying to adopt the whole “one day at a time” mindset either, but maybe a week? 2 weeks? Just long enough to get over the initial hurdle and start feeling the positive effects.

Sorry to sidetrack, but wanted to riff off on sobriety vs addictive behaviour vs spending habits… I think my ADHD is kicking in now that I’ve stopped numbing myself, and I’ve found new fixations to obsess over. Mainly teeth whitening products, na beers, and investing into new gear for every hobby that piques my interest. To the point where my partner is expressing concern rather than celebrating my sobriety.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

*This isn’t a flex about having lots of money either, I’m doing okay, but recently put a home reno project on credit while waiting on interest free funding, and have taken on the attitude of “hey why not invest in myself as well even if it means using credit”.

Easy Slider · « **Reply #558 on:** June 29, 2023, 02:54:59 AM »

Quote from: Coastal Fever on June 29, 2023, 02:50:21 AM

The only thing I’d warn against a 6 month plans is that can be a daunting and discouraging length of time. Not saying to adopt the whole “one day at a time” mindset either, but maybe a week? 2 weeks? Just long enough to get over the initial hurdle and start feeling the positive effects.

Sorry to sidetrack, but wanted to riff off on sobriety vs addictive behaviour vs spending habits… I think my ADHD is kicking in now that I’ve stopped numbing myself, and I’ve found new fixations to obsess over. Mainly teeth whitening products, na beers, and investing into new gear for every hobby that piques my interest. To the point where my partner is expressing concern rather than celebrating my sobriety.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

*This isn’t a flex about having lots of money either, I’m doing okay, but recently put a home reno project on credit while waiting on interest free funding, and have taken on the attitude of “hey why not invest in myself as well even if it means using credit”.

Lol bruh, sounds familiar. When I stopped drinking, my attention actually turned to skateboarding and that's what I have been obsessing over ever since. I am also obsessed with other stuff and have become a coffee addict. I guess it comes with an addictive character to substitute one "drug" with another. Just try to pick obsessions that are not as destructive as drugs and alcohol.

EdLawndale · « **Reply #559 on:** June 29, 2023, 12:05:26 PM »

Yeah, everybody's different.

I chose to do the six months of alcohol because that was what was advised by the program I started doing, Moderation Management, which takes a more secular/scientific, harm-reduction approach to drinking as opposed to the spiritual/religious, complete abstinence approach that AA focuses on. Six months seemed doable for me. But, yeah, everybody is different.

That said, one might need to experience their bottom to truly make a change.

When I woke up spread out on the grass of my front lawn, wearing a full suit, with all my shit missing, and only vague recollections of basically breaking out of the ER (lol), I decided that was it for me. I'm gonna tackle this shit.

I think I've said this before, but I liken how I consider my bottom to that scene in "Scarface" when Manny chastises Tony Montana for crushing on their boss' wife.

Manny says something to the effect of, "Remember, a year ago, we were in a hell-hole prison." To which Tony responds, "You choose to remember that if you want. I want to forget it."

I think Manny had the right idea and Tony was doing himself a disservice. I try to stay in touch with how awful I felt that day I woke up, because keeping that memory alive in my mind reminds me how much I do not want to return to that.

IUTSM · « **Reply #560 on:** June 29, 2023, 12:51:16 PM »

Quote from: Easy Slider on June 29, 2023, 02:54:59 AM

Quote from: Coastal Fever on June 29, 2023, 02:50:21 AM
Expand Quote
The only thing I’d warn against a 6 month plans is that can be a daunting and discouraging length of time. Not saying to adopt the whole “one day at a time” mindset either, but maybe a week? 2 weeks? Just long enough to get over the initial hurdle and start feeling the positive effects.

Sorry to sidetrack, but wanted to riff off on sobriety vs addictive behaviour vs spending habits… I think my ADHD is kicking in now that I’ve stopped numbing myself, and I’ve found new fixations to obsess over. Mainly teeth whitening products, na beers, and investing into new gear for every hobby that piques my interest. To the point where my partner is expressing concern rather than celebrating my sobriety.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

*This isn’t a flex about having lots of money either, I’m doing okay, but recently put a home reno project on credit while waiting on interest free funding, and have taken on the attitude of “hey why not invest in myself as well even if it means using credit”.
[close]

Lol bruh, sounds familiar. When I stopped drinking, my attention actually turned to skateboarding and that's what I have been obsessing over ever since. I am also obsessed with other stuff and have become a coffee addict. I guess it comes with an addictive character to substitute one "drug" with another. Just try to pick obsessions that are not as destructive as drugs and alcohol.

I hit the thrift/junk stores for my fix

don't even really buy shit most of the time but much like the mission of going to a bar or the process of going to get fucked up in one way or another, the mission or ritual of digging around the thrift store for 15 minutes while looking for .25 cent books or whatever, is a whole heck of a lot better than getting wasted or high.

JoseCansnake0 · « **Reply #561 on:** June 29, 2023, 06:19:22 PM »

Quote from: KC_Rookie on June 28, 2023, 02:16:39 PM

I appreciate that.
That's the crazy thing, anytime I drink way too much I always feel ashamed the next morning no matter how the night went. But lately I've been doing my binge drinking at home, alone. That part scares me too.
Thankfully I'm good at staying away from my phone and computer so far, heh.

I think I'll give your 6 month plan a try, that sounds about up my alley.
Sucks to have to start it when summer is just kicking off, but the booze isn't gonna wait until it's convenient for me, and hey, 4th of July will be a good last hurrah before going off the wagon...or on the wagon...I can't remember which means "doesn't drink"...

This is what I was doing towards the end of my drinking career. I was hiding beers from my wife, and staying up way too late just mindlessly getting drunk. I would be so hungover the next day that work was an absolute struggle that I had to fight to accomplish (outside sales, which made it even harder). By late afternoon, I was so exhausted from work and just shaking my hang over, it was time to pick up some more beers.

I will be 2 years sober in August, and it's the best decision I've made. The moment you start hanging around drunk people while you're sober, you'll know why you quit. Hopefully, because it's fucking unbearable, and a waste of time and money.

Idk · « **Reply #562 on:** June 30, 2023, 06:57:21 AM »

Will hit 96 hours sober tonight!!!

Idk · « **Reply #563 on:** July 03, 2023, 10:16:42 AM »

One week clean

Longest I’ve ever been clean since junior year of high school and I’m turning 27 in a few days

Easy Slider · « **Reply #564 on:** July 03, 2023, 10:24:08 AM »

Quote from: Idk on July 03, 2023, 10:16:42 AM

One week clean
Longest I’ve ever been clean since junior year of high school and I’m turning 27 in a few days

Big up dude!

Natas_Fauxas · « **Reply #565 on:** July 06, 2023, 07:07:04 PM »

I have been on here with the same name twice. First time i posted about how i was excited to be almost 2 years or so sober. Well i completely fell into a full on drinking binge. I did the absolutely classic mistake of thinking i could have one at my friends wedding.

That was a year ago today. Im only 1 month dry. I do smoke bud, but no tobacco etc. I swear it was easier last time when i stopped to keep no doing so. RN its insane to not drink. Any advice? I stay away from drinking friends when they are doing that. I try to just keep my mind off it.

Idk · « **Reply #566 on:** July 06, 2023, 07:16:32 PM »

Quote from: Natas_Fauxas on July 06, 2023, 07:07:04 PM

I have been on here with the same name twice. First time i posted about how i was excited to be almost 2 years or so sober. Well i completely fell into a full on drinking binge. I did the absolutely classic mistake of thinking i could have one at my friends wedding.

That was a year ago today. Im only 1 month dry. I do smoke bud, but no tobacco etc. I swear it was easier last time when i stopped to keep no doing so. RN its insane to not drink. Any advice? I stay away from drinking friends when they are doing that. I try to just keep my mind off it.

Do you have access to a day treatment program or an IOP (intensive outpatient program)

Natas_Fauxas · « **Reply #567 on:** July 06, 2023, 08:13:47 PM »

im in our local AA program rn. I may have a sponsor lined up this week. I know that i just cant drink. Im dry rn i just gotta do something else.

Easy Slider · « **Reply #568 on:** July 06, 2023, 09:13:49 PM »

Quote from: Natas_Fauxas on July 06, 2023, 08:13:47 PM

im in our local AA program rn. I may have a sponsor lined up this week. I know that i just cant drink. Im dry rn i just gotta do something else.

Stay strong bro, you got this.

Idk · « **Reply #569 on:** July 07, 2023, 03:47:35 AM »

Quote from: Natas_Fauxas on July 06, 2023, 08:13:47 PM

im in our local AA program rn. I may have a sponsor lined up this week. I know that i just cant drink. Im dry rn i just gotta do something else.

what has helped me is journaling, acknowledging the anxiety and depression that comes out once you stop numbing yourself. Journal your cravings every time they come. I just wrote I want to get high and I wrote it so many times the first few days. I don’t really have cravings now. Just dealing with the underlying mental health issues that caused me to spiral into addiction. Move. Like I’d just lay in bed and think of terrible shit so now when I wake up I get up and go outside or just go get some water. Have you tried SMART recovery meetings? They don’t do higher power but instead emphasize on your own responsibility. I like the meetings and they have virtual or in person. If you want to join mine you can dm me.