Sketchy, yet funny, things you’ve seen

[SAH ALL DAY]

Thread about to be filled with white trash

I'm going to say hip hop Muska, Olson, and Penny is the best shit you got, tagging and rapping, loving real hip hop.

[igrindtwinkies]

Shout out to Hwood for following me back.

[johnes]

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Not sure how I haven’t put this together but is this the little Grom from the old Baker videos Evan Hernandez??

Yup

[backside_reacharound]

Is Hwood the black J Cas, or is J Cas the white Hwood?

[JANUS]

I used to work nights. I would see weird shit. One night, I was driving home around 4 AM and I stopped at a red light. I look to my right. There was a car with dark windows stopped to my right. I look to my left. There is a naked man casually walking toward my car. I burst out laughing. The naked guy sees me laughing and runs up to my car. He’s banging on my window and trying to open the door to get into the backseat. I throw it in reverse, back up, and drive over to the right turning lane beside the dark window car. Naked man is running after the car, still trying to get in. I tried to yell “nah man, you can’t put your naked ass on my leather!” But I was laughing way too hard. At this point, I notice the dark window car has rows of lights in the windows and I realize it’s an unmarked cop car. So I yell out my window something like “ay, you gonna do anything about this naked motherfucker trying to ass up my leather?” The dark windows come down, two perplexed police faces stare back at me, then they become aware of the naked dude trying to get in my car. The cops get out the car, naked dude books it back from whence he came, the light turned green, and I went home.

[cucktard]

I had a job where I worked late. One snowy night coming home, I see this girl walking around with no jacket, looking pretty off it.

I stopped the car, she was sober enough to speak but was messed up on something bad. 

I took her to Denny’s and ordered her some food and listened to her story.

Apparently she wasn’t getting along with her husband, he was asking weird sexual favors of her, so she took off for a few days on some kind of bender.

She sobered up a bit, and we got back into my car so I could drop her off somewhere safe. She asked me if I thought she was attractive. I lied and said yes (she was a bit of a mess, she might have been ok if she was cleaned up). She was having a rough time and I wanted her to not hate herself.

She asked if she could kiss me, and I provisionally said yes. Not because I wanted to, but for the same reason I lied.
This was the only time I ‘cheated’ on my then girlfriend, now wife.

She then got turned on, and asked me if we could have sex. I said ‘No, I’m not what you need right now’. I calmed her down, and she finally decided I should drive her back to her home where her husband was.

I let her out, took off and thought ‘I’m probably exactly what you needed’.

[ok boomer]

[fs1/2cab]

A lovely summer night in Berlin.

It is the year 2013, 10 pm at a friday. It was really warm and all the party people are on their way to the clubs .I cruise down the street to meet my friends. A group of ladies in front of me. One prettier as the other. I pop my board into my hands. Beautiful girl turns around. Asks me where the Magnet club is, I tell her, that I am going into that direction and they should follow me.
I tell the girls to wait a minute, I need to pee. So I stand in front of a wall, pull my wiener out. Beautiful girl suddenly is next to me, lifts up her skirt and starts to pee against the wall with me. Totally bad ass.
Man I really wish I had asked about her number.

[fakie nollie]

There’s this dude a few towns over from where I grew up who would go on these weird rants on Instagram and then delete the videos. So, for about 3-4 months, I had a side project where I screen recorded them and re-upped it on an account that mirrored his.

I’ve often thought of messaging him from that account just to see what would happen.

https://instagram.com/sediment.ally?igshid=1sk4ph3qfdq6h

I now follow this page. My favorite so far:

[Dark Knight]

Prius’s cigar cutter here on SLAP.

All this talk about her puckered starfish has me weirdly intrigued just so I can assess it myself and come to my own conclusion.

[elbarto]

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Not sure how I haven’t put this together but is this the little Grom from the old Baker videos Evan Hernandez??

[close]

Yup

From the footage I’ve seen of him as a kid this is the last thing I expected lmao

[EdLawndale]

Is Hwood the black J Cas, or is J Cas the white Hwood?

Terrible

[matty_c]

I tattooed a skate-Homie’s girlfriend’s ass-hole (and around the sphincter too) . They broke up a while ago. She had the skin of a 60 year old, despite being in her mid-20’s.

What was the tattoo?

[50mm]

I can't sleep.
I'm trying to think of sketchy and funny but all the sketchy shit I know is just fucked up.

Went to a party in high school for seniors when we were a year or two younger. We show up in my best friends mom's beat up car, and just as we are walking up there are like 10 people jumping a guy and a girl in a circle. We are just caught off guard when we hear a shotgun blast and everyone takes off running. Friend takes forever to get his mom's car that we took without permission going because he doesn't know how to drive a stick and get out just before the cops roll up and ziptie like 20 people. It was funny looking back and remembering all these cars leaving and my friend frantically trying to get us going.

Either that night or another one, we took it off roading again without his mom knowing and nosedived off a bump. Cracked the radiator and fucked it all up. Eventually we got back to his street, rolled down the road in neutral and parked it out front without saying anything. She had recently gotten a new car so nobody was driving that one.

Those dudes are nuts. When I wasn't hanging around much that same guy had a beater his mom got him and crashed through like a fence or something. It was all fucked up and his mom was nuts so they took it to the desert, smashed it up, burned it, spray painted gang shit on it and reported it stolen the next day.

[David Lee Sloth]

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Prius’s cigar cutter here on SLAP.

[close]

All this talk about her puckered starfish has me weirdly intrigued just so I can assess it myself and come to my own conclusion.

I know, right. Where is the evidence?

[Roast beef]

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Prius’s cigar cutter here on SLAP.

[close]

All this talk about her puckered starfish has me weirdly intrigued just so I can assess it myself and come to my own conclusion.

[close]

I know, right. Where is the evidence?

The photographic evidence was on slap but get deleted. Too late buddy.

[Toadfish Rebecchi]

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A girl I went to highschool with also lost her mind on drugs and took a similar path. She ran away from home in 2011. Was seen prostituting around camden but was mostly “missing” for about 5-6 years. They found some of her bones washed up along the Delaware river a few years back.

Oh didn’t read about it being funny, just sketchy.

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Your username and this post ain't it.

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I apologize Georgecat. Im sorry a reference to a sun kil moon song and a story about a girl I knew “Ain’t it.” Sorry George.

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Which Sun Kil Moon song we talking here?

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twenty something. JohnnySaintLethal is a man who gave his book to mark kozelek. The song is about him. Seeing as you don’t know the song in reference you either recognize the author of the book which I doubt or just made a really odd assumption of an internet strangers username and decided if it is it or it ain’t. Apparently it ain’t.

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I've enjoyed the odd Sun Kil song in passing, is why I asked. Anyway, this isn't a Sun Kil forum, I don't think, and if you're going to use a name with the word Lethal in it and make posts about washed up bones and the word "missing" oddly placed in quotation marks you might expect someone to make note of it.

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Quoted missing because everyone who knew her knew she was prostituting in Camden and it wasn’t some big mystery of where she was. This is also not a forum about cats named George either, or at least I don’t think it is  so I’m not sure what either of our usernames have to do with what forum we are on. Quite frankly you haven’t even contributed anything regarding the topic of this thread. Sketchy or funny. So , i will have to inform you that you ain’t it. Good day.

I don’t think George will be able to come back to that. Perfect.

[AngryPetesDonkeyWanktury]

Went to get pizza after a night on the beer we are pretty faded eating it outside the takeaway when this fairly sizable chick comes over being a dickhead demanding we hand over the pizza or she would get her boyfriend to come beat us up. My bud takes two steps and kicks her right in the fairy cave.

[fakie n0llie]

Went to get pizza after a night on the beer we are pretty faded eating it outside the takeaway when this fairly sizable chick comes over being a dickhead demanding we hand over the pizza or she would get her boyfriend to come beat us up. My bud takes two steps and kicks her right in the fairy cave.

All day!

[elbarto]

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Prius’s cigar cutter here on SLAP.

[close]

All this talk about her puckered starfish has me weirdly intrigued just so I can assess it myself and come to my own conclusion.

[close]

I know, right. Where is the evidence?

[close]

The photographic evidence was on slap but get deleted. Too late buddy.

As much as I hate to say it, I’m glad I was on the boards for the short time that was up.

[Roast beef]

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Prius’s cigar cutter here on SLAP.

[close]

All this talk about her puckered starfish has me weirdly intrigued just so I can assess it myself and come to my own conclusion.

[close]

I know, right. Where is the evidence?

[close]

The photographic evidence was on slap but get deleted. Too late buddy.

[close]

As much as I hate to say it, I’m glad I was on the boards for the short time that was up.

Yeah respect to the guy who posted those pics, he must of knew he’d get banned for that but done it anyway. Talk about taking one for the team.