Author Topic: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone  (Read 2110 times)

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Skibb

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #30 on: September 13, 2020, 11:11:13 PM »
We put on The Dark Knight to have something going on in the background, but I just couldn't stop watching even though she was all over. Dumb.

Good movie though.

Bigalo

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #31 on: September 14, 2020, 01:29:32 AM »
Stank ass pussy, shit made me gag, which I guess rly isnít that stupid, but the stench was so bad, my hand reeked after

ok boomer

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #32 on: September 14, 2020, 09:32:06 AM »
Turned down this attractive lass when I was 17, due to being so wasted that I was over analyzing just the possibility of giving a bad performance. I was trying to achieve that goal, but I was drinking for hours and also smoking illegal weed smoke that night. I couldn't even stand up right or anything. Also, she had a water bed and the bed itself was giving me extreme bed spins. I remember thinking that karma was getting me for something bad I did because, why offer up a good batch of class A punani, then let me be hammered on a fucking water bed. I ended up sleeping on the floor next to the water bed and felt some weird sense of shame for days afterwards.

So, performance anxiety

theSketchLord

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #33 on: September 14, 2020, 11:39:07 AM »
I turned down the chance to get with a girl who went on to become an FHM cover girl because I was scared I'd never be good enough for her.
"Broke the tail, like a well oiled snail"

matty_c

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #34 on: September 15, 2020, 02:17:21 AM »
Turned down this attractive lass when I was 17, due to being so wasted that I was over analyzing just the possibility of giving a bad performance. I was trying to achieve that goal, but I was drinking for hours and also smoking illegal weed smoke that night. I couldn't even stand up right or anything. Also, she had a water bed and the bed itself was giving me extreme bed spins. I remember thinking that karma was getting me for something bad I did because, why offer up a good batch of class A punani, then let me be hammered on a fucking water bed. I ended up sleeping on the floor next to the water bed and felt some weird sense of shame for days afterwards.

So, performance anxiety

This a true story, about a dude with a micro penis. Singer in this semi famous band in Brisbane. Heís gonna bang this lady one night and she bursts out laughing when she sees his micro penis and she says who the hell are you gonna please with that

Big grin on his face and he says me

Lame_Nigga

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #35 on: September 15, 2020, 06:45:20 AM »
This girl pronounced it as "me-mes" and that totally just bothered me beyond comprehension. I told her I had to go let my cat back in. We had had sex before but I was done after that

She used me as a rebound 5 years later though so I guess she got her payback.

L33Tg33k

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #36 on: September 15, 2020, 05:30:42 PM »
I couldn't afford the asking price.
Before you say the music sucked, have you considered shutting the fuck up?

mynameisnotjeff

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #37 on: September 15, 2020, 05:38:27 PM »
The first time was me being too nervous to try anything. I over thought about it and kept waiting for her to do the first move. I was caught up in my head.

The second time, we made out and gota little handsy at the bar and she wanted to come at my place but, I moved back home and didnít want to get caught.
Nothing I do deserves more than an iphone camera.

Adam Abbas

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #38 on: September 15, 2020, 07:26:20 PM »
Was seeing this girl and the first and only time she invited me to her place, it was getting close to midnight on Friday. I was working an overnight weekend shift at a newscentre because I needed extra money and would be there alone. Plus the guy who was working there before me was a real prick and would've blabbed about it saying that I wasn't there when I was supposed to be, and I could've gotten in trouble.

So unfortunately I had to leave her place quickly. After she showed me around and we talked, I lost track of time and needed to leave. I gave her oral, and then she wanted to fuck as well - and of course I wanted to - but after discussion and foreplay it was already getting late and I couldn't afford to jeopardize my job. Then she got really upset the next day, and I decided to break it off just based on how she didn't understand my side of things. And then she wrote me an apology email and wished me well, which was nice. In retrospect I should've cut the foreplay and discussion short, but oh well.

Freelancevagrant

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #39 on: September 15, 2020, 07:35:21 PM »
I was just getting back from my third deployment and I was drinking heavily. My ex invited me over to have a few drinks and try and reconnect. She had a roommate that was pretty rude to me but I didn't really notice until hindsight.

Those few drinks turned into a pint of wild turkey and a few tall boys of mgd. I told her I had to go to the bathroom real quick, but I sat on the toilet seat with my pants on, locked the door, pucked into a trash can, shit my pants and blacked out for a few hours.

When I came to, her roommate had pissed herself and they asked me to leave, which I did.

pugmaster

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #40 on: September 15, 2020, 08:59:07 PM »
I couldn't afford the asking price.

You may very well be my spirit animal. 

We still definitely are in a recession, so I feel you.
I like my women the same way I like my personified cups of coffee...black...strong...and proud.

McBrandt

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #41 on: September 16, 2020, 11:04:56 AM »
One time I bought a bottle of wild turkey for a neighbor's underage ex-girlfriend who was 18/19 and working at Hooters. She wanted to drink it at my place and was making all sorts of insinuations about me being hot and her being horny. I was like 'well, I gotta go to my brother's place now' instead of making a move. I was somewhat freshly separated from my wife, and was a good 8-9 years older than the Hooters girl. I also felt bad for her ex who lived across from me because i remembered being 18 and in love and getting dumped.

Pabst

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #42 on: September 16, 2020, 08:13:24 PM »
-I didn’t like her dogs X1
-Didn’t want to function as a roll model for the kid X1
-Realized my dick is racist (no honkies please, but it’s not your fault) X2
-Incoherent spelling to assert wokeness X1
-Racist against white people (actually that’s a good reason to not to pursue in hindsight) X1
-I get shy boner in public places X3
-I’m not into cocaine X1
-Pissed myself X1
-“I love you”
« Last Edit: September 16, 2020, 09:52:09 PM by Pabst »

ungzilla

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #43 on: September 16, 2020, 08:18:45 PM »

pugmaster

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #44 on: September 17, 2020, 02:18:49 AM »
Then just emphatically say, "Mangia! Mangia!" in response.
I like my women the same way I like my personified cups of coffee...black...strong...and proud.

AssMountain

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #45 on: September 17, 2020, 03:11:49 AM »
Expand Quote
Turned down this attractive lass when I was 17, due to being so wasted that I was over analyzing just the possibility of giving a bad performance. I was trying to achieve that goal, but I was drinking for hours and also smoking illegal weed smoke that night. I couldn't even stand up right or anything. Also, she had a water bed and the bed itself was giving me extreme bed spins. I remember thinking that karma was getting me for something bad I did because, why offer up a good batch of class A punani, then let me be hammered on a fucking water bed. I ended up sleeping on the floor next to the water bed and felt some weird sense of shame for days afterwards.

So, performance anxiety
[close]

This a true story, about a dude with a micro penis. Singer in this semi famous band in Brisbane. Heís gonna bang this lady one night and she bursts out laughing when she sees his micro penis and she says who the hell are you gonna please with that

Big grin on his face and he says me

Hahahah, oh shit what band? Might have met this person.

ok boomer

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #46 on: September 17, 2020, 07:13:45 AM »
Just remembered another failure. When I was 27, I'd just broken up with a long term girlfriend (like 8 years) and I hooked up with this girl, who was a raver. Full on giant pants, big sunglasses (at night), shitty music etc. Well the first night, we had sex and the highlight was me getting tangled in her giant ass pants as I took them off. So 2 or 3 days later, we went out again. During this "date", all I could really think of was how I didn't want to be on a date, or be in a relationship, I needed a break from all this kind of shit. I was trying to make the most of the night (I also felt some guilt for already having score the first night we hung out previously.. like I had some "obligation" or something). Anyway, we went back to my place, and I pulled out ye olde marijuana pipe to honestly, calm myself down on the dumb thoughts I was having. I said "hey let's watch this" (put on the movie "the Beach") and promptly fell asleep laying on her lap/ shoulder. Basically just flopped on her. I woke up and she was playing with my hair, like "taking care of me" type things. And she started "making the moves", and I abruptly stood up "yo I gotta take you home". Ultimately, I knew I didn't want to make the same mistake. So I drove her home (literally lived like 3 minute drive from me), she didn't talk to me, nor say goodbye and we never talked again.

This might not be a stupid reason, but I went with the not having sex part.

JANUS

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #47 on: September 17, 2020, 07:21:00 AM »
-I didnít like her dogs X1
-Didnít want to function as a roll model for the kid X1
-Realized my dick is racist (no honkies please, but itís not your fault) X2
-Incoherent spelling to assert wokeness X1
-Racist against white people (actually thatís a good reason to not to pursue in hindsight) X1
-I get shy boner in public places X3
-Iím not into cocaine X1
-Pissed myself X1
-ďI love youĒ

Wait, if your dick hates whitey, and the potential partner hated whitey, then I feel like there was a shared interest there that you overlooked.
If you can't handle me at my Marc Johnson, you don't deserve me at my Bobby Puleo.

hot take

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #48 on: September 17, 2020, 09:48:18 AM »
My dick couldnít get hard because I was too nervous

LesbianPUNCH

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #49 on: September 17, 2020, 03:38:57 PM »
This actually happened to me a few months ago during the peak of quarantine. My neighbor at my apartment is hella cute, we vibed super well, weíd go on long bike rides and drink cocktails and chill on her roof every night.

And then one night she tried to take it all the way, I was feeling it, I tried to go down on her and she was like ďno, I donít like that.Ē And it bummed me the fuck out, literally couldnít get an erection, she asked me if I was gay, the whole vibe turned abruptly, and now we donít talk at all. My subconscious has an erection kill switch.

sexhaver2006

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #50 on: September 17, 2020, 03:58:37 PM »
Had sex with this girl a week after getting into college. Got flamed later by friends because she was pigeon footed (I didn't notice at the time we met). She wanted to keep hooking up but I didn't want to be seen with someone pigeon-footed.

I'd like to think I'm a lot less shallow now.

Pabst

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #51 on: September 17, 2020, 05:14:02 PM »
Expand Quote
-I didnít like her dogs X1
-Didnít want to function as a roll model for the kid X1
-Realized my dick is racist (no honkies please, but itís not your fault) X2
-Incoherent spelling to assert wokeness X1
-Racist against white people (actually thatís a good reason to not to pursue in hindsight) X1
-I get shy boner in public places X3
-Iím not into cocaine X1
-Pissed myself X1
-ďI love youĒ
[close]

Wait, if your dick hates whitey, and the potential partner hated whitey, then I feel like there was a shared interest there that you overlooked.

Fuck this drew some chuckles. Got me!

Full disclosure in the modern era, I'm white. I just can't make it work with white girls and I couldn't tell you why. I tried! I promise! My old roommate dropped that golden quote post breakup and it stuck, "His dick's racist!"

Though the racist chick was full throttle outward white genocide, which I found out after a few evenings in the sheets. With a good statement, "I'm not having your baby, I'm just fucking you." Quiiick pass!

Craig Lutzka

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #52 on: September 17, 2020, 05:19:52 PM »
One of my friends told me she had been with Dloy and I refuse to knowingly being Eskimo broís with that dude.

ungzilla

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #53 on: September 17, 2020, 05:38:37 PM »
it's actually an eskimo braaah in that case

Freelancevagrant

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #54 on: September 17, 2020, 07:12:53 PM »
One of my friends told me she had been with Dloy and I refuse to knowingly being Eskimo broís with that dude.

Did she know she had been with dloy?

L33Tg33k

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #55 on: September 17, 2020, 07:39:43 PM »
Expand Quote
One of my friends told me she had been with Dloy and I refuse to knowingly being Eskimo broís with that dude.
[close]

Did she know she had been with dloy?
Perfection
Before you say the music sucked, have you considered shutting the fuck up?

El Fapinator

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #56 on: September 17, 2020, 09:39:46 PM »
Stank ass pussy, shit made me gag, which I guess rly isnít that stupid, but the stench was so bad, my hand reeked after
Jesus Christ who are you fucking?!  a person that hasn't washed their ass?!   Stank pussy is easily identifiable.....

moneymoneymoney

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #57 on: September 17, 2020, 11:47:06 PM »
this thread name is redundant. if you dont want to have sex with someone, then you dont want to have sex with them. there is no point in forcing yourself into having sex if both parties are not into it, there are no stupid reasons. there are, on the other hand, stupid excuses. ive been TOLD, "my dog ate my homework." that was a bad excuse.....because there was no dog and she wasnt in school. reminds me of the story when gonz told busenitz that he couldnt go skate because his cat was depressed.......fact check, gonz is allergic to cats and therefore, is not a "cat-person."

ice nine

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #58 on: September 17, 2020, 11:58:02 PM »
one time i told my ex that i couldnít come over cuz i had to go for a late night run. trying to lose weight etc. really i just went to mcdonaldís and 7/11 and ate candy at home.
I;m sure i;m not the only dc/monster/subaru type guy here

mex.ceferino

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Re: Your most stupid reason to NOT have sex with someone
« Reply #59 on: September 18, 2020, 12:15:45 AM »
1) Back in middle school Bc i was super infatuated with this one girl... who i barely talked to and barely knew me lol
Nothing ever happened. We just said hi and we occassionally talked in class but i was too insecure and shy around her to hit on her.
Seriously, i missed plenty of opportunities to lose my v-card and be sexually active around those years with other girls but i guess i was reaally into that chick for some odd reason and i didnt feel like having sex with someone else

2) fear of breaking the condom and getting my then gf pregnant (we were both 17, virgins, and inexperienced)


I just want everyone to know that I'm only 32.8% skateboarder, and that's on a good day. The rest is just soy and cum.