Author Topic: Exvangelicals Post Up  (Read 2661 times)

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Easy Slider

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #30 on: May 13, 2021, 03:38:48 AM »
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I am an ex-exvangelical. I grew up in an evangelical household and church and did the routine but also truly believed in God. However, as a teenager I slowly drifted away from the church until I stopped attending altogether and for the next 20 years I rarely set my foot into a church (except for weddings and funerals) and never even opened the Bible. I did not lose my faith tho and kept praying. Sure enough I got into partying, smoking, drinking etc. I managed to get a job and also got married but I certainly drank too much.

Then, almost five years ago, my wife became interested in God and we attended a few evenings in a church in my city (not the one I grew up) and then started attending regularly. A year later we both got baptized into this church, which is a small evangelical outfit with Anabaptist roots. I also started reading the Bible on a regular basis and praying with my wife. My life has changed quite dramatically since: I stopped smoking (cigs and weed), drinking and some other things. The strange thing about it is that no one forced me to do it and I didn't even force myself, it just happened. In my eyes, it is my renewed relation with Jesus that caused this.

Now kook me if you must  ;D
[close]

No one is gonna kook you, if it works for you, then great. It worked for all the people who were at church and enjoying it. But for a lot of us out was damaging and bad. But I'm glad you found a church that makes you happy



Thanks. I think that‘s an important point: It‘s not the particular church you attend that will make you happy. As a matter of fact and as some of the posts in this thread show, a lot of churches got a lot of things wrong, traumatizing and even abusing people. Even the church I attend is far from perfect. Ideally the church is a place to fellowship with other believers, but it is the personal faith in Jesus Christ that counts and will make all the difference.
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matty_c

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #31 on: May 13, 2021, 05:02:58 AM »
I got caned in primary school by the vice principal and maybe ten years later cunts in the paper for being a pedo
He was a teacher though

I know two priests from school and I don’t reckon they’re pedos, was doing a bathroom a couple years ago and one of them was living next door, that was kind of cool to see him. He was this cool young priest when I was a kid and he’s got a pretty big parish now but yeah poor bugger seemed mad disillusioned with his life choices

The other ones old as fuck now and I haven’t seen him for years but my mums still in contact with him, he feels the same way as other one from what I heard

They don’t really look after the old priests too well, at least from what I have seen
listen to cosmic psychos

Wheelbyte

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #32 on: May 13, 2021, 05:38:16 AM »
I got caned in primary school by the vice principal and maybe ten years later cunts in the paper for being a pedo
He was a teacher though

I know two priests from school and I don’t reckon they’re pedos, was doing a bathroom a couple years ago and one of them was living next door, that was kind of cool to see him. He was this cool young priest when I was a kid and he’s got a pretty big parish now but yeah poor bugger seemed mad disillusioned with his life choices

The other ones old as fuck now and I haven’t seen him for years but my mums still in contact with him, he feels the same way as other one from what I heard

They don’t really look after the old priests too well, at least from what I have seen

Psychiatrists are #1 career for suicide, guess priests and pastors are like shrinks too. Most of the time people go mental from shit food and drink.

TwisT

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #33 on: May 13, 2021, 07:41:41 AM »
I was lucky. Never liked church just because it was just boring. We moved states and never found a new church so I was good.


but did you guys have Young Life? It's basically a youth group that was weaved into the social structure. Kids went to young life hangouts and parties and were basically shamed or harassed if they didn't show up. The purpose of these hangouts were to preach and instil Christian values and basically brainwash kids. My s/o's sister began a group leader post high school but was ousted when she realized she was lesbian. She was immediately removed from her leader/mentor role and her kids were instructed to go no contact.

DaleSr

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #34 on: May 13, 2021, 08:42:27 AM »
Young life is wild. I have some friends who were involved at one point but aren't any longer.

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #35 on: May 14, 2021, 12:59:11 PM »
I was kicked out of my house when I told my mom I was an atheist. I was 18 anyway. She let me back in after I spent the summer at my grandma's. Now I openly make fun of the ridiculousness of religion right in front of her. 8)
Before you say the music sucked, have you considered shutting the fuck up?

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #36 on: May 14, 2021, 01:37:53 PM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
I am an ex-exvangelical. I grew up in an evangelical household and church and did the routine but also truly believed in God. However, as a teenager I slowly drifted away from the church until I stopped attending altogether and for the next 20 years I rarely set my foot into a church (except for weddings and funerals) and never even opened the Bible. I did not lose my faith tho and kept praying. Sure enough I got into partying, smoking, drinking etc. I managed to get a job and also got married but I certainly drank too much.

Then, almost five years ago, my wife became interested in God and we attended a few evenings in a church in my city (not the one I grew up) and then started attending regularly. A year later we both got baptized into this church, which is a small evangelical outfit with Anabaptist roots. I also started reading the Bible on a regular basis and praying with my wife. My life has changed quite dramatically since: I stopped smoking (cigs and weed), drinking and some other things. The strange thing about it is that no one forced me to do it and I didn't even force myself, it just happened. In my eyes, it is my renewed relation with Jesus that caused this.

Now kook me if you must  ;D
[close]

No one is gonna kook you, if it works for you, then great. It worked for all the people who were at church and enjoying it. But for a lot of us out was damaging and bad. But I'm glad you found a church that makes you happy
[close]



Thanks. I think that‘s an important point: It‘s not the particular church you attend that will make you happy. As a matter of fact and as some of the posts in this thread show, a lot of churches got a lot of things wrong, traumatizing and even abusing people. Even the church I attend is far from perfect. Ideally the church is a place to fellowship with other believers, but it is the personal faith in Jesus Christ that counts and will make all the difference.

hey right, I practice/teach yoga and meditation. I do work with myself and in community that's of a spiritual nature- really, most things I do, I see as a way to get higher in meditation with god/the universe/living&dying. A significant portion of the work goes on inside (heartmind) and is put into action outside- I'm not doing anything because of or for faith/spirituality/god/whatever name is applied, but rather I've found the spiritual nature to coincide with my natural MO, and to sometimes serve as a reminder to come back to the true nature of goodness/love/kindness/compassion with no strings/dogma/belief attached. My teacher says "Love Everyone, Serve Everyone, Remember God (and always tell the truth)." He also said to look at everyone like they're "God in drag." It's a real mellow thing.

Anyways, I responded to your post regarding the fellowship piece. I'll tell ya that when we get together to sit and breathe together for a half hour or an hour, the air changes, our consciousness changes. It's literally electric (brain imaging of meditators shows some interesting electrical stuff going on) and we connect in deep ways, even if only for a time. The more we do it, the deeper we connect. The deeper we connect, the more we understand the nature of human suffering. It gets juicy when we come together.

I'm not into the Christian church trip but good for you dude. Enjoy the juice, man
If you plant ice, you’re gonna harvest wind

TheBoognish

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #37 on: May 14, 2021, 03:02:09 PM »
I'm always astounded to see how big religion and the Church are in the States, and yes, I'm assuming the majority (not all) of you are Americans, if you aren't, my bad.

Growing up in Quebec City, I knew ONE person my whole life (I'm almost 33) that was my age who went to mass regularly and was involved in the Church. One.. not two or three... ONE. To this day I'm pretty sure the only reason he was involved was because his dad was the head of the theology department at Laval University and somewhat of a big-shot in that domain, because I highly doubt Oli cared about it. He smoked weed, partied with us and skipped school with us, he was not the "model" Christian whatsoever. Had it not been for his dad, he would have never went. Fuck, he's the guy I had my first acid trip with and he made me discover black metal in high school.

Only time I've ever been inside a Church other than for a funeral was for my first communion in grade 4 (late 1997 or 98). That was because my mom wanted me to do it more than anything (Irish Catholic heritage) and I fucking hated it. 3 or 4 months of Sunday school, I hated it so much. My dad hated it too, boy did he not want to be there; he'd sleep the whole time or spend the whole time listening to music in the car or go for walk and have some coffee. My dad went to a strict Catholic all-boys school in the 60's and was beaten by his teachers, my dad fucking despises the Church and wouldn't even piss on it if it were on fire.

After every class, the Sunday school teacher would tell my mom how I absolutely refused to participate and did not want to be there, I did everything I could to get kicked out and not have to come back. I was never a trouble maker, but I have a knack for getting out of situations I don't like, so if I had to be a giant pain in the ass for everyone to get out of it, that's what I did... but alas, it didn't work. That dude was so patient with me, I hope he's well today, he wasn't a bad dude at all.

That was the general vibe, kids being forced by their parents to go because of "tradition". No one wanted to be there, no one gave a shit at all. By grade 6 it was Confirmation time and I flat out told her that there was no way I'd be spending every Sunday for a couple months in Sunday school, my dad wanted no part of that either, so she had no choice. I had started skateboarding then, there was no way I was going to miss one of the two days a week I had to go skate. 

Quebec is very atheist, less than 40% of new borns are baptized and religion is considered in "steep decline". None of my friends who have kids have had them baptized, and none of them are married. Church culture in next to none-existent here.

I mean shit, there's a part in our history that is known as "La Grande Noirceur", or "The Great Darkness" in english. That's when hard-line conservative Christian crackpots ran the province. Just the name says it all in regards to our view of the Church.

Not knocking you guys or your families at all, if it makes you happy, believe all you want. I will never knock on someone for being into religion, but it was never my thing at all, and it's still the case to this day... it's just not a part of the culture I grew up around. Respect to you all, and keep doing your thing if it makes you happy.


DaleSr

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #38 on: May 15, 2021, 11:20:41 AM »
I'm always astounded to see how big religion and the Church are in the States, and yes, I'm assuming the majority (not all) of you are Americans, if you aren't, my bad.

Growing up in Quebec City, I knew ONE person my whole life (I'm almost 33) that was my age who went to mass regularly and was involved in the Church. One.. not two or three... ONE. To this day I'm pretty sure the only reason he was involved was because his dad was the head of the theology department at Laval University and somewhat of a big-shot in that domain, because I highly doubt Oli cared about it. He smoked weed, partied with us and skipped school with us, he was not the "model" Christian whatsoever. Had it not been for his dad, he would have never went. Fuck, he's the guy I had my first acid trip with and he made me discover black metal in high school.

Only time I've ever been inside a Church other than for a funeral was for my first communion in grade 4 (late 1997 or 98). That was because my mom wanted me to do it more than anything (Irish Catholic heritage) and I fucking hated it. 3 or 4 months of Sunday school, I hated it so much. My dad hated it too, boy did he not want to be there; he'd sleep the whole time or spend the whole time listening to music in the car or go for walk and have some coffee. My dad went to a strict Catholic all-boys school in the 60's and was beaten by his teachers, my dad fucking despises the Church and wouldn't even piss on it if it were on fire.

After every class, the Sunday school teacher would tell my mom how I absolutely refused to participate and did not want to be there, I did everything I could to get kicked out and not have to come back. I was never a trouble maker, but I have a knack for getting out of situations I don't like, so if I had to be a giant pain in the ass for everyone to get out of it, that's what I did... but alas, it didn't work. That dude was so patient with me, I hope he's well today, he wasn't a bad dude at all.

That was the general vibe, kids being forced by their parents to go because of "tradition". No one wanted to be there, no one gave a shit at all. By grade 6 it was Confirmation time and I flat out told her that there was no way I'd be spending every Sunday for a couple months in Sunday school, my dad wanted no part of that either, so she had no choice. I had started skateboarding then, there was no way I was going to miss one of the two days a week I had to go skate. 

Quebec is very atheist, less than 40% of new borns are baptized and religion is considered in "steep decline". None of my friends who have kids have had them baptized, and none of them are married. Church culture in next to none-existent here.

I mean shit, there's a part in our history that is known as "La Grande Noirceur", or "The Great Darkness" in english. That's when hard-line conservative Christian crackpots ran the province. Just the name says it all in regards to our view of the Church.

Not knocking you guys or your families at all, if it makes you happy, believe all you want. I will never knock on someone for being into religion, but it was never my thing at all, and it's still the case to this day... it's just not a part of the culture I grew up around. Respect to you all, and keep doing your thing if it makes you happy.



Do you think that this is a specifically quebecois brand of secularism or do the other provinces share in the areligiousness

Fhk

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #39 on: May 15, 2021, 11:45:01 AM »
Expand Quote
I'm always astounded to see how big religion and the Church are in the States, and yes, I'm assuming the majority (not all) of you are Americans, if you aren't, my bad.

Growing up in Quebec City, I knew ONE person my whole life (I'm almost 33) that was my age who went to mass regularly and was involved in the Church. One.. not two or three... ONE. To this day I'm pretty sure the only reason he was involved was because his dad was the head of the theology department at Laval University and somewhat of a big-shot in that domain, because I highly doubt Oli cared about it. He smoked weed, partied with us and skipped school with us, he was not the "model" Christian whatsoever. Had it not been for his dad, he would have never went. Fuck, he's the guy I had my first acid trip with and he made me discover black metal in high school.

Only time I've ever been inside a Church other than for a funeral was for my first communion in grade 4 (late 1997 or 98). That was because my mom wanted me to do it more than anything (Irish Catholic heritage) and I fucking hated it. 3 or 4 months of Sunday school, I hated it so much. My dad hated it too, boy did he not want to be there; he'd sleep the whole time or spend the whole time listening to music in the car or go for walk and have some coffee. My dad went to a strict Catholic all-boys school in the 60's and was beaten by his teachers, my dad fucking despises the Church and wouldn't even piss on it if it were on fire.

After every class, the Sunday school teacher would tell my mom how I absolutely refused to participate and did not want to be there, I did everything I could to get kicked out and not have to come back. I was never a trouble maker, but I have a knack for getting out of situations I don't like, so if I had to be a giant pain in the ass for everyone to get out of it, that's what I did... but alas, it didn't work. That dude was so patient with me, I hope he's well today, he wasn't a bad dude at all.

That was the general vibe, kids being forced by their parents to go because of "tradition". No one wanted to be there, no one gave a shit at all. By grade 6 it was Confirmation time and I flat out told her that there was no way I'd be spending every Sunday for a couple months in Sunday school, my dad wanted no part of that either, so she had no choice. I had started skateboarding then, there was no way I was going to miss one of the two days a week I had to go skate. 

Quebec is very atheist, less than 40% of new borns are baptized and religion is considered in "steep decline". None of my friends who have kids have had them baptized, and none of them are married. Church culture in next to none-existent here.

I mean shit, there's a part in our history that is known as "La Grande Noirceur", or "The Great Darkness" in english. That's when hard-line conservative Christian crackpots ran the province. Just the name says it all in regards to our view of the Church.

Not knocking you guys or your families at all, if it makes you happy, believe all you want. I will never knock on someone for being into religion, but it was never my thing at all, and it's still the case to this day... it's just not a part of the culture I grew up around. Respect to you all, and keep doing your thing if it makes you happy.


[close]

Do you think that this is a specifically quebecois brand of secularism or do the other provinces share in the areligiousness
My wife's family are from Québec and from my visits I was under the impression that Catholicism was huge in their area. I know the architecture of the churches I have seen is amazing.

mushroom slice

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #40 on: May 15, 2021, 11:45:47 AM »
I have never been to church but I have done some drugs and seen some things. Strange things. Things that made me think for a long time. I tried to find pictures of the things I saw and I found these drawings of how angels are described in the book. Tbh they look like things a person sees on drugs.

RichardBarkley

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #41 on: May 15, 2021, 01:54:17 PM »
I have never been to church but I have done some drugs and seen some things. Strange things. Things that made me think for a long time. I tried to find pictures of the things I saw and I found these drawings of how angels are described in the book. Tbh they look like things a person sees on drugs.


DMT right there
I want to fight you so badly richard
Please give me your address ill make it my life goal to punsh your face in

TheBoognish

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #42 on: May 15, 2021, 02:25:57 PM »
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.

Growing up in Quebec City, I knew ONE person my whole life (I'm almost 33) that was my age who went to mass regularly and was involved in the Church.


[close]

Do you think that this is a specifically quebecois brand of secularism or do the other provinces share in the areligiousness

Damn, didn’t realize how much of a wall of text that was, I was baked and fired up I guess.

If could be, but I guess it has to do more with our history with the church more than anything. Hard-line Catholicism was badly digested by the people, and Quebecois people are very vocal about their dislike of anything. Politically, Quebec is also quite to the left compared to the rest of Canada, especially the prairies which tend to be more conservative, so that might be why as well..

The general rule is the closer you get to the middle of Canada, the more religious it is (I don’t know about the Maritimes, though). I lived in BC a few years and overall everywhere on the coast and ski towns were fairly secular, interior BC had those small towns that seemed quite religous. I met some realllllly religious people in Lethbridge, AB (about an hour from Fernie, BC) which quite frankly scared the shit out or me. I had never seen, met or even heard of hard-line Pentecostals ‘till I stopped at a gas station in Lethbridge.



Wheelbyte

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #43 on: May 15, 2021, 06:34:49 PM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
.

Growing up in Quebec City, I knew ONE person my whole life (I'm almost 33) that was my age who went to mass regularly and was involved in the Church.


[close]

Do you think that this is a specifically quebecois brand of secularism or do the other provinces share in the areligiousness
[close]

Damn, didn’t realize how much of a wall of text that was, I was baked and fired up I guess.

If could be, but I guess it has to do more with our history with the church more than anything. Hard-line Catholicism was badly digested by the people, and Quebecois people are very vocal about their dislike of anything. Politically, Quebec is also quite to the left compared to the rest of Canada, especially the prairies which tend to be more conservative, so that might be why as well..

The general rule is the closer you get to the middle of Canada, the more religious it is (I don’t know about the Maritimes, though). I lived in BC a few years and overall everywhere on the coast and ski towns were fairly secular, interior BC had those small towns that seemed quite religous. I met some realllllly religious people in Lethbridge, AB (about an hour from Fernie, BC) which quite frankly scared the shit out or me. I had never seen, met or even heard of hard-line Pentecostals ‘till I stopped at a gas station in Lethbridge.

inlanders can suffer from iodine deficiency and possible mental retardation
just look at trump states

also flatlanders with big 180degree sky
may have perception issues from never being on a hill
« Last Edit: May 16, 2021, 05:31:29 AM by Wheelbyte »

Clone1984

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #44 on: May 20, 2021, 09:43:45 PM »
Raised Catholic. didnt know I was Catholic. had my first communion illicitly. Stopped going to church when I was a teenager because I started watching Shepherds chapel on public access where he taught his own interpretation of the bible and that religion was bad and man made. Started playing final fantasy 7 religiously. looked up that creatures and references were from the bible. started to study the bible very slowly. didnt realize I was struggling with mental illness my whole life. created my own anime fantasy characters. got transferred between four different high schools. graduated continuation high early. went to community college. fell for a goth girl that had pink hair and went to raves. got kicked out and or ran away from home after dying my hair blue and got a job at a tattoo parlor in hollywood. stayed dedicated to the goth scene for nearly ten years. started skating in my mid twenties after being indoctrinated into 12 stepping had a sponsor who was evangelical and spiritually abusive. Read the whole bible in and out of rehab. learned to pray the rosary after having a dream of the virgin mary after a really bad break up. became a confirmed catholic at 30 was knighted in the church at 27. had visions of christ and the saints. didnt realize I was mentally Ill. developed an eating disorder that almost killed me and finally got put on medication. Got engaged. oh and I am LGBTQ and so is my partner. found the experience as an adult in the church to be extremely biased and racist and homophobic. have a close friend who is ex military and an atheist help me screw my head on straight. I am still catholic but rarely ever go to mass. sometimes I go to confession and adoration. still pray the rosary almost every day. I think the church is bad news but I still believe it is the oldest one and the original. my fiancee is a wiccan druid elder. we are still going to try to get married. I study apologetics but find myself to be more and more of a skeptic. I would've become a buddhist a long time ago if I didnt have catholic tattoos or have some lingering hope my visions were authentic. but thank whatever is out there for medication and therapy. oh and AWS 4 lyfe

The Drew

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #45 on: May 20, 2021, 10:13:54 PM »
My Dad used to make us go to church... but my brother sister and I would always just mess around and complain about how boring it was ... when we were old enough to be left at home unattended we stopped going.

I hate whinging now but Geeze I am glad i whinged every time we had to go to church

DaleSr

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #46 on: May 23, 2021, 01:28:36 PM »
Raised Catholic. didnt know I was Catholic. had my first communion illicitly. Stopped going to church when I was a teenager because I started watching Shepherds chapel on public access where he taught his own interpretation of the bible and that religion was bad and man made. Started playing final fantasy 7 religiously. looked up that creatures and references were from the bible. started to study the bible very slowly. didnt realize I was struggling with mental illness my whole life. created my own anime fantasy characters. got transferred between four different high schools. graduated continuation high early. went to community college. fell for a goth girl that had pink hair and went to raves. got kicked out and or ran away from home after dying my hair blue and got a job at a tattoo parlor in hollywood. stayed dedicated to the goth scene for nearly ten years. started skating in my mid twenties after being indoctrinated into 12 stepping had a sponsor who was evangelical and spiritually abusive. Read the whole bible in and out of rehab. learned to pray the rosary after having a dream of the virgin mary after a really bad break up. became a confirmed catholic at 30 was knighted in the church at 27. had visions of christ and the saints. didnt realize I was mentally Ill. developed an eating disorder that almost killed me and finally got put on medication. Got engaged. oh and I am LGBTQ and so is my partner. found the experience as an adult in the church to be extremely biased and racist and homophobic. have a close friend who is ex military and an atheist help me screw my head on straight. I am still catholic but rarely ever go to mass. sometimes I go to confession and adoration. still pray the rosary almost every day. I think the church is bad news but I still believe it is the oldest one and the original. my fiancee is a wiccan druid elder. we are still going to try to get married. I study apologetics but find myself to be more and more of a skeptic. I would've become a buddhist a long time ago if I didnt have catholic tattoos or have some lingering hope my visions were authentic. but thank whatever is out there for medication and therapy. oh and AWS 4 lyfe

Damn dude, there's a lot going on there

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #47 on: May 23, 2021, 02:59:22 PM »
Was raised christian up till the age of 14. Spent the years from 15-24 just avoiding church and religious talk, instead focused on punk and skateboarding and being gay.
Recently have found comfort within the Bible and religious symbolism. I was always raised with the idea that the bible is infallible and has to be completely accepted; picking and choosing wasn’t allowed. Now I can appreciate the positive aspects of community through religion without being smeared for homosexuality, drug use, or being poor.
One aspect I appreciate is prayer, putting thought into an action in the hopes that I can establish some control in my life. I pray for my family, my friends, everyone I care about, and even if nothing happens I know that it brings me comfort. Doesn’t seem any different to the idea of “manifesting” that tiktok witches have today.

The return to christian practice started about two years ago when my dad died. I was so used to working with him every day and very suddenly he was gone. We were home remodelers and we used to take long drives through backroads while talking shit and listening to music(since my dad always had some sketchy vehicle that wasn’t street legal). After his passing, there was a repeated occurrence where I’d be driving though an empty road listening to something he liked, and I’d suddenly feel like I wasn’t alone. At first I’d cry, pull over, sit in silence or do whatever I had to do, but after a while I learned to use the moments to talk to my dad. He is there in my passenger seat while we listen to Los Bukis, he’s telling me about how boring the Beach Boys are, he’s asking me about distant family and cousins he hadn’t seen in years. We will fight and argue, we will laugh so much you’d think I’m crazy, we will just sit together in silence. I will tell him about the job I got after he passed as a residential superintendent, which was exactly the kind of career he wanted me to move up to.
The connection I felt after my dad’s death would have been inconceivable to who I had become after Christianity had successfully snuffed my childhood hope and curiousity. I had hated the idea of heaven and earth so bad that I convinced myself there was nothing more after death. Now I don’t think that’s the case. Maybe my dad’s gone, and now my grandma too, but they’re not really gone. It’s like energy, it’s never destroyed or created, just turns into something else. Well, now I carry some of that energy. And even if I’m not on my knees praying to the lord, I see the cross and the bible as reminders of what drove the people who I loved more than anything in the world in their daily lives. We lose so much physical reminders of the people we love but my brain won’t let me forget the memories.
And on days when I’m scared and older and a little more sad, and someone is hurting and suffering because life is cruel, I say a little prayer and wish that tomorrow brings a smile or some bit of joy into our lives. And you know what, sometimes it does.

DaleSr

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #48 on: May 24, 2021, 11:13:04 AM »
Was raised christian up till the age of 14. Spent the years from 15-24 just avoiding church and religious talk, instead focused on punk and skateboarding and being gay.
Recently have found comfort within the Bible and religious symbolism. I was always raised with the idea that the bible is infallible and has to be completely accepted; picking and choosing wasn’t allowed. Now I can appreciate the positive aspects of community through religion without being smeared for homosexuality, drug use, or being poor.
One aspect I appreciate is prayer, putting thought into an action in the hopes that I can establish some control in my life. I pray for my family, my friends, everyone I care about, and even if nothing happens I know that it brings me comfort. Doesn’t seem any different to the idea of “manifesting” that tiktok witches have today.

The return to christian practice started about two years ago when my dad died. I was so used to working with him every day and very suddenly he was gone. We were home remodelers and we used to take long drives through backroads while talking shit and listening to music(since my dad always had some sketchy vehicle that wasn’t street legal). After his passing, there was a repeated occurrence where I’d be driving though an empty road listening to something he liked, and I’d suddenly feel like I wasn’t alone. At first I’d cry, pull over, sit in silence or do whatever I had to do, but after a while I learned to use the moments to talk to my dad. He is there in my passenger seat while we listen to Los Bukis, he’s telling me about how boring the Beach Boys are, he’s asking me about distant family and cousins he hadn’t seen in years. We will fight and argue, we will laugh so much you’d think I’m crazy, we will just sit together in silence. I will tell him about the job I got after he passed as a residential superintendent, which was exactly the kind of career he wanted me to move up to.
The connection I felt after my dad’s death would have been inconceivable to who I had become after Christianity had successfully snuffed my childhood hope and curiousity. I had hated the idea of heaven and earth so bad that I convinced myself there was nothing more after death. Now I don’t think that’s the case. Maybe my dad’s gone, and now my grandma too, but they’re not really gone. It’s like energy, it’s never destroyed or created, just turns into something else. Well, now I carry some of that energy. And even if I’m not on my knees praying to the lord, I see the cross and the bible as reminders of what drove the people who I loved more than anything in the world in their daily lives. We lose so much physical reminders of the people we love but my brain won’t let me forget the memories.
And on days when I’m scared and older and a little more sad, and someone is hurting and suffering because life is cruel, I say a little prayer and wish that tomorrow brings a smile or some bit of joy into our lives. And you know what, sometimes it does.

That seems really cool. I'm not spiritual at all, but respect to anything that brings people comfort in this brutal meat grinder we call life. I also try and recontextualize a lot of what i learned growing up and try and focus on being good to people i run into in my life as a secular wwjd type thing

somedudefromnj

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #49 on: June 05, 2021, 08:05:38 PM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
I am an ex-exvangelical. I grew up in an evangelical household and church and did the routine but also truly believed in God. However, as a teenager I slowly drifted away from the church until I stopped attending altogether and for the next 20 years I rarely set my foot into a church (except for weddings and funerals) and never even opened the Bible. I did not lose my faith tho and kept praying. Sure enough I got into partying, smoking, drinking etc. I managed to get a job and also got married but I certainly drank too much.

Then, almost five years ago, my wife became interested in God and we attended a few evenings in a church in my city (not the one I grew up) and then started attending regularly. A year later we both got baptized into this church, which is a small evangelical outfit with Anabaptist roots. I also started reading the Bible on a regular basis and praying with my wife. My life has changed quite dramatically since: I stopped smoking (cigs and weed), drinking and some other things. The strange thing about it is that no one forced me to do it and I didn't even force myself, it just happened. In my eyes, it is my renewed relation with Jesus that caused this.

Now kook me if you must  ;D
[close]

No one is gonna kook you, if it works for you, then great. It worked for all the people who were at church and enjoying it. But for a lot of us out was damaging and bad. But I'm glad you found a church that makes you happy
[close]



Thanks. I think that‘s an important point: It‘s not the particular church you attend that will make you happy. As a matter of fact and as some of the posts in this thread show, a lot of churches got a lot of things wrong, traumatizing and even abusing people. Even the church I attend is far from perfect. Ideally the church is a place to fellowship with other believers, but it is the personal faith in Jesus Christ that counts and will make all the difference.

just wanted to thank you for posting this. Too many creepy believers give ¨Christianity¨ a bad rep, especially in America. One day I realized the bible is dope, prayer works, and showing up to a building on Sundays doesn´t really say a damn thing about character.

Was raised christian up till the age of 14. Spent the years from 15-24 just avoiding church and religious talk, instead focused on punk and skateboarding and being gay.
Recently have found comfort within the Bible and religious symbolism. I was always raised with the idea that the bible is infallible and has to be completely accepted; picking and choosing wasn’t allowed. Now I can appreciate the positive aspects of community through religion without being smeared for homosexuality, drug use, or being poor.
One aspect I appreciate is prayer, putting thought into an action in the hopes that I can establish some control in my life. I pray for my family, my friends, everyone I care about, and even if nothing happens I know that it brings me comfort. Doesn’t seem any different to the idea of “manifesting” that tiktok witches have today.

The return to christian practice started about two years ago when my dad died. I was so used to working with him every day and very suddenly he was gone. We were home remodelers and we used to take long drives through backroads while talking shit and listening to music(since my dad always had some sketchy vehicle that wasn’t street legal). After his passing, there was a repeated occurrence where I’d be driving though an empty road listening to something he liked, and I’d suddenly feel like I wasn’t alone. At first I’d cry, pull over, sit in silence or do whatever I had to do, but after a while I learned to use the moments to talk to my dad. He is there in my passenger seat while we listen to Los Bukis, he’s telling me about how boring the Beach Boys are, he’s asking me about distant family and cousins he hadn’t seen in years. We will fight and argue, we will laugh so much you’d think I’m crazy, we will just sit together in silence. I will tell him about the job I got after he passed as a residential superintendent, which was exactly the kind of career he wanted me to move up to.
The connection I felt after my dad’s death would have been inconceivable to who I had become after Christianity had successfully snuffed my childhood hope and curiousity. I had hated the idea of heaven and earth so bad that I convinced myself there was nothing more after death. Now I don’t think that’s the case. Maybe my dad’s gone, and now my grandma too, but they’re not really gone. It’s like energy, it’s never destroyed or created, just turns into something else. Well, now I carry some of that energy. And even if I’m not on my knees praying to the lord, I see the cross and the bible as reminders of what drove the people who I loved more than anything in the world in their daily lives. We lose so much physical reminders of the people we love but my brain won’t let me forget the memories.
And on days when I’m scared and older and a little more sad, and someone is hurting and suffering because life is cruel, I say a little prayer and wish that tomorrow brings a smile or some bit of joy into our lives. And you know what, sometimes it does.

Sorry for the loss homie. Glad you manage to keep having that glimmer of hope

Praying all of you find joy in so so many things

Cheers everyone

Lol. Eldee is definitely a human. He’s like a raider on horse back who’s kinda scared to do battle. Somehow he closes his eyes and swings his sword wildly and wakes up in a pile of dead orcs.


dstrytruitt

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #50 on: June 06, 2021, 05:35:02 PM »
I was a perfect little nerd with straight As in elementary school until the last year when I started skateboarding. I didn't need to study much and most shit came easy. Attended an insane amount of extracurricular activities, except for sports. Bible study (or religion class or something like that) was just one of those activities. I played along and got excellent grades (almost everyone got them).

My father's grandparents are religious, while my mother's are not. I was baptized very late and all the other sacraments were basically done not to offend anyone, no one in my close family really cares about religion. So after elementary school I never went to church again, expect for one wedding. Proud atheist and I don't bear any scars of attending mass, I just find it baffling that adults still believe this shit.

I still have a hard time watching church having a tangible power in political issues at home and abroad. One thing that I have come to realize is that religion is mostly just an escape to find reasons for the harsh life events like disease that pops up randomly in people's lives. It is hard to accept that life essentially has no meaning and people seek a reason to exist for a cause and to belong to a community (so can you really blame them).

Cool Ceith

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #51 on: June 07, 2021, 05:37:39 PM »
I was raised Jehovah's Witness and it took a very long time to recover from the brainwashing. (Side note: I had to deal with some gnarly sexual abuse from one of the "elders" when I was a kid, and even though I brought it to my mom's attention several times, they just kept letting that guy off with a slap on the wrist. Molestation is definitely not just a plague in the Catholic church.) The hypocrisy was too much. I'm not against spirituality, or even religion really, but my experience has completely shut me down to the possibility of a Christian path.

I'm in my 40s now and have an OK relationship with my mom, but she's still a hardcore witness and there is always this unspoken hostility on my part. In the "Truth" as they call it, witnesses need to disown family members that aren't practicing witnesses/leave the religion. So… there's always a lot of "witnessing" going during our phone calls. I think it's her little loophole: as long as she's trying to get me to go back to a kingdom hall, then she doesn't have to excommunicate me or whatever they call it. I've told her that I'm not a witness, and I don't want to go to meetings (in the nicest way possible), but I haven't asked her to please for the love of Jehovah stop trying to get me into a kingdom hall!

Anyway, there is a lot more to this but I will just say one thing that might be helpful. If you are interested in joining a religion or are currently being pitched by an evangelical, research what their teachings are about relationships/friendships with people outside of the faith. If you're taught that there's no hope for non-believers and you are forbidden to associate with them because Satan (or another villain) is controlling their actions, think twice. It's a not-so-subtle way of controlling you.

rawr1922

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #52 on: June 07, 2021, 06:11:46 PM »
Cool Ceith,
 
Heart breaking to hear what happened to you. In cases like yours, wish swift justice take place against those types of people. Those same abuse cases turned me off from catholicism. Religion really does the opposite of spreading the gospel of peace. Divides & preys on people. God created man. And man created religion. Certain the holy spirit does not support all these people who do the opposite of what the bible says. A couple years ago, got really into reading scripture & doing bible studies with like minded people going through recovery. Felt more enlightenmet & peace from 1 bible study then years of going to church. Church such a dog & pony show. Rarely go nowadays only if someone ask me to go, all about reading the bible. Very uplifting & written like beautiful song lyrics. 
 
Here's some of my favs: 
 
John 15:13
Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends   
 
Matthew 6:34
 
2 Corinthians 4:17-18
 
Romans 8:18

Romans 12:2
 
Luke 6:38

Matthew 7:13-14
 
Psalm 55:22

Whenever I'm  feeling super radical like Sheckler, I read the Armor of God : Ephesians 6:10 - 6:24



DaleSr

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #53 on: June 07, 2021, 06:48:25 PM »
I was raised Jehovah's Witness and it took a very long time to recover from the brainwashing. (Side note: I had to deal with some gnarly sexual abuse from one of the "elders" when I was a kid, and even though I brought it to my mom's attention several times, they just kept letting that guy off with a slap on the wrist. Molestation is definitely not just a plague in the Catholic church.) The hypocrisy was too much. I'm not against spirituality, or even religion really, but my experience has completely shut me down to the possibility of a Christian path.

I'm in my 40s now and have an OK relationship with my mom, but she's still a hardcore witness and there is always this unspoken hostility on my part. In the "Truth" as they call it, witnesses need to disown family members that aren't practicing witnesses/leave the religion. So… there's always a lot of "witnessing" going during our phone calls. I think it's her little loophole: as long as she's trying to get me to go back to a kingdom hall, then she doesn't have to excommunicate me or whatever they call it. I've told her that I'm not a witness, and I don't want to go to meetings (in the nicest way possible), but I haven't asked her to please for the love of Jehovah stop trying to get me into a kingdom hall!

Anyway, there is a lot more to this but I will just say one thing that might be helpful. If you are interested in joining a religion or are currently being pitched by an evangelical, research what their teachings are about relationships/friendships with people outside of the faith. If you're taught that there's no hope for non-believers and you are forbidden to associate with them because Satan (or another villain) is controlling their actions, think twice. It's a not-so-subtle way of controlling you.

I'm terribly sorry to hear about the abuse you suffered from elders. I know that the JWs especially have a massive problem with that specifically because of their "neutrality" in political and governmental things. I can't tell what's worse, the catholic church's systemic shuffling and covering up of abuse or the absolute apathy and cowardice of the JWs refusal to report abusers, pedophiles and predators.

I'm glad you are able to continue to have a relationship with your mom considering how hardcore JWs tend to be with disowning those who leave the church. She must really love you still to even look for ways around the church's rules.

Also the section that i bolded in your quote is huge. Big big red flag that your church community is trying to isolate you and build dependence on them

EdLawndale

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #54 on: June 08, 2021, 10:42:49 PM »
saw a lot of strange things that could not be explained.

I'll bite. What sort of strange things?
"Was just about to say, wtf is up with this EdLawndale guy?"


Willie

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #55 on: June 09, 2021, 04:36:58 AM »
Expand Quote
saw a lot of strange things that could not be explained.
[close]

I'll bite. What sort of strange things?

Did his pictures not load for you? Apparently he saw the Angels from Bayonetta!

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #56 on: June 09, 2021, 08:51:44 AM »
Expand Quote
I am an ex-exvangelical. I grew up in an evangelical household and church and did the routine but also truly believed in God. However, as a teenager I slowly drifted away from the church until I stopped attending altogether and for the next 20 years I rarely set my foot into a church (except for weddings and funerals) and never even opened the Bible. I did not lose my faith tho and kept praying. Sure enough I got into partying, smoking, drinking etc. I managed to get a job and also got married but I certainly drank too much.

Then, almost five years ago, my wife became interested in God and we attended a few evenings in a church in my city (not the one I grew up) and then started attending regularly. A year later we both got baptized into this church, which is a small evangelical outfit with Anabaptist roots. I also started reading the Bible on a regular basis and praying with my wife. My life has changed quite dramatically since: I stopped smoking (cigs and weed), drinking and some other things. The strange thing about it is that no one forced me to do it and I didn't even force myself, it just happened. In my eyes, it is my renewed relation with Jesus that caused this.

Now kook me if you must  ;D
[close]

No one is gonna kook you, if it works for you, then great. It worked for all the people who were at church and enjoying it. But for a lot of us out was damaging and bad. But I'm glad you found a church that makes you happy


I respect & appreciate your willingness to be open & honest about your experience. I personally think it's beyond powerful & certainly not a coincidence that this came naturally for you. I too have/had a similar experience.

Long story short, I was raised Catholic and went to Catholic school; it was absolutely terrible and abusive when my 30 year old self reflects on the entire experience. My parents divorced early on in life and as a result, I had a some behavioral issues that a Catholic school was not able to address. Not to mention I was raised by my Dad and he struggled to meet my emotional needs. My mother was in the picture but really just served a fun friend that I saw twice a week and spent every other weekend with. I think by the time I got to high school and leveled out, I stopped believing in God and pretty much resented religion. I was never sacrilegious as I know some people go through a phase were they have to show there adamant hatred or disapproval of religion, something I still find unnecessary and childish, regardless of your beliefs. In about 2017, I was in Graduate School and recently had become engaged. I was working full time & in an accelerated Masters Program doing well but socially and emotionally struggling. I was stressed and just worried. My first instinct was to start praying and just say "thanks" to someone (God I would later find) for what I have and to talk to someone about my worries. Some days it would be super specific requests, others would just be general conversations. Either way, I pray every day and just say thanks to God as I can truly say he has answered all of my prayers.

I will add that this is nice to see that others are willing to talk about this & not be judgmental as one of my best friend's really gave me a hard time when I let him know I have tapped into the spiritual side of myself. He has since apologized but it's super frustrating knowing that some people present as these accepting, loving diverse folks and when it comes to anything associated with God or spirituality in the most generic terms, it is shunned and viewed in disgust.

All I can say is God has been good to me. Proceed to kook me!

DaleSr

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #57 on: June 09, 2021, 05:09:41 PM »


I will add that this is nice to see that others are willing to talk about this & not be judgmental as one of my best friend's really gave me a hard time when I let him know I have tapped into the spiritual side of myself. He has since apologized but it's super frustrating knowing that some people present as these accepting, loving diverse folks and when it comes to anything associated with God or spirituality in the most generic terms, it is shunned and viewed in disgust.

All I can say is God has been good to me. Proceed to kook me!


I mean the reason why people do react in a hostile way to that at times is because they themselves were shunned, marginalized or berated because of the fact they are diverse, gay or different by people who are in leadership at churches or make Christianity a huge part of their identity. I'm not going to loop you into all that stuff, but i think we all can attest in this thread that homophobia and low to high key racism are very present in most evangelical Christian spaces. Again, totally dope and awesome that it brings you peace and comfort and fulfillment, but that's not everyone's experience and probably colors how they view other people who share the faith that hurt them so much.

But no one is going to kook you and it's cool that it works for you

(edit)

Now that I'm thinking, I don't want my only response to be reflexively defensive. I know that that's my usual response because I've had to bring up the plight of people who don't feel welcome in church to people who are still faithful. But I don't want that to be the only way I interact with you. I'm glad that God has blessed you. I'm glad you feel spiritual fulfillment
« Last Edit: June 09, 2021, 09:36:20 PM by DaleSr »

Hinna

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Re: Exvangelicals Post Up
« Reply #58 on: July 02, 2021, 04:36:48 PM »
read up on the epic of gilgamesh and its similarities to the bible