Author Topic: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread  (Read 40994 times)

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Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #120 on: April 02, 2022, 10:28:55 PM »
Ok. That was kind of awesome. Fuck the WWE but Austin can still go and Owens played his role perfectly. I was furious that Stone Cold was drinking PBR until I realized Austin wasn't courting the hipster audience and it was actually his new beer. They did a pretty good job of keeping people guessing as to what the whole thing would be but I don't think anyone expected a full 10 minute old school brawl through the crowd. They should have let Owens blade, that match deserved blood.
Him selling the last stunner by slumping over like he was dead and getting rolled out to the floor was poetry in motion.

I was almost positive I would be disappointed by this in some way but honestly the only thing I can complain about is the FUCKING CAMERA CUTS. It's so disorienting and just takes me out of the moment that it's seriously unwatchable at times. When they were in the corner they must have cut 50 times in about 30 seconds and I wish I was exaggerating. Holy shit. Fuck off Kevin Dunn. The match got so much better when they went into the crowd and they could only use the follow cam (although they sure as hell tried to mix the wide shot in) and that got me back into it enough to coast through the ending.

I slept through most of the card, I'm sure I'll go back and try to rewatch it at some point but it's going to be a slog. I did see most of Becky's match and she's on a different level. Also fuck you Seth Rollins.

Brock and Roman have a hard act to follow.

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #121 on: April 03, 2022, 08:56:21 PM »
Actually attempting to watch night 2 but I'm giving myself a 20 minute buffer so I can skip around when it gets rough.

Sami Zayn is awesome but that match would have been better if it ended with him heluva kicking wee man in the face. I hate it when celebrities win, it feels like such a sell-out.

After all this time Lashley still amazes me with how simultaneously impressive and boring he is.

Rhea Ripley and Liv Morgan look like they're about to shoot a lesbian bondage scene.

Did AJ just accidentally punch himself in the face and bust himself open walking down the ramp? I'm pretty sure he did.

That new day match was awful. Pete Dunne as butch is stupid as fuck and they basically buried the new day again. You couldn't cut one of the 40 video recap packages and give them a few more minutes?

Pat McAfee is a blind spot for me. I think he's awesome but he could be awful and I wouldn't notice. It's like watching one of my big dumb jock Yinzer buddies living out our adolescent dream so of course I marked out huge for the entrance and win. Can't believe how over he is with this crowd hahaha. I'm also cracking up at evil old Mr. McBurns sitting there with a flirty homoerotic smirk every time his prize golden muscle twink does something good. Vince should probably never take his jacket off again, it's getting harder and harder for him to deny that he's a member of the reptilian illuminati.

Vince's segment with stone cold was predictable but I still popped. Definitely another blind spot because I know it's going to be terrible if I try to rewatch it.

Brock vs Roman in the Heyman on a pole match. I didn't really want to watch this until Brock did his own intro, I'm in. Nice little callback there when Roman rubbed his forehead and looked concerned when Brock took his gloves off. Is this honestly what they're going to do? Just do finishers back and forth over and over? This kind of sucks. Yeah that sucked. Pretty lame main event.

Edit: it's the morning after. Night 2 definitely wasn't as good as night one, although Pat McAfee tried his best. I think 2 nights is definitely the way forward but it still felt really bloated and uneven at times. They did better on the pacing this year but some matches were too short (new day match, main event could have been an actual match and not just spamming finishers) and some were too long (AJ - edge could have had a lot of fat trimmed). Overall this was a hell of a good event though. I wish it was a little more focused on the actual wrestling but I had fun and there were more hits than misses.

That being said, there's no way I'm even going to attempt to watch raw or smackdown. Even as much as I enjoyed this there were several points where I switched tabs and watched the last rampage or stuff I missed from night 1. It just doesn't hold my attention the way AEW or old ECW does, probably because I'm a salty old smark that craves blood and unprotected chair shots to the head. Other than the pure nostalgia stuff and Yinzer bias my favorite thing about mania was Cody doing his AEW entrance and move set, so it's going to be interesting to see how they manage to fuck up his booking this time around.



« Last Edit: April 04, 2022, 01:42:19 AM by Buttfart Rapedick »

Mr. Kamikazi

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #122 on: April 04, 2022, 05:28:15 AM »
Actually attempting to watch night 2 but I'm giving myself a 20 minute buffer so I can skip around when it gets rough.

Sami Zayn is awesome but that match would have been better if it ended with him heluva kicking wee man in the face. I hate it when celebrities win, it feels like such a sell-out.

After all this time Lashley still amazes me with how simultaneously impressive and boring he is.

Rhea Ripley and Liv Morgan look like they're about to shoot a lesbian bondage scene.

Did AJ just accidentally punch himself in the face and bust himself open walking down the ramp? I'm pretty sure he did.

That new day match was awful. Pete Dunne as butch is stupid as fuck and they basically buried the new day again. You couldn't cut one of the 40 video recap packages and give them a few more minutes?

Pat McAfee is a blind spot for me. I think he's awesome but he could be awful and I wouldn't notice. It's like watching one of my big dumb jock Yinzer buddies living out our adolescent dream so of course I marked out huge for the entrance and win. Can't believe how over he is with this crowd hahaha. I'm also cracking up at evil old Mr. McBurns sitting there with a flirty homoerotic smirk every time his prize golden muscle twink does something good. Vince should probably never take his jacket off again, it's getting harder and harder for him to deny that he's a member of the reptilian illuminati.

Vince's segment with stone cold was predictable but I still popped. Definitely another blind spot because I know it's going to be terrible if I try to rewatch it.

Brock vs Roman in the Heyman on a pole match. I didn't really want to watch this until Brock did his own intro, I'm in. Nice little callback there when Roman rubbed his forehead and looked concerned when Brock took his gloves off. Is this honestly what they're going to do? Just do finishers back and forth over and over? This kind of sucks. Yeah that sucked. Pretty lame main event.

Edit: it's the morning after. Night 2 definitely wasn't as good as night one, although Pat McAfee tried his best. I think 2 nights is definitely the way forward but it still felt really bloated and uneven at times. They did better on the pacing this year but some matches were too short (new day match, main event could have been an actual match and not just spamming finishers) and some were too long (AJ - edge could have had a lot of fat trimmed). Overall this was a hell of a good event though. I wish it was a little more focused on the actual wrestling but I had fun and there were more hits than misses.

That being said, there's no way I'm even going to attempt to watch raw or smackdown. Even as much as I enjoyed this there were several points where I switched tabs and watched the last rampage or stuff I missed from night 1. It just doesn't hold my attention the way AEW or old ECW does, probably because I'm a salty old smark that craves blood and unprotected chair shots to the head. Other than the pure nostalgia stuff and Yinzer bias my favorite thing about mania was Cody doing his AEW entrance and move set, so it's going to be interesting to see how they manage to fuck up his booking this time around.

Pretty solid review. I too was wondering about AJ Styles’ face. Not a fan of him so this just added to me thinking this guy is a clown. I felt like the women’s’ matches were solid & did well in terms of creating a powerful division of WWE. The RKBro match ruled & as for the rest, I enjoyed it BUT hated that Reigns won. Deep down I knew that’s going to be the case but I’ve been a fan of Lesnar since his original debut.

krookedjuice

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #123 on: April 04, 2022, 07:04:46 AM »
I'm definitely more of a casual wrestling fan these days, but Royal Rumble and Wrestlemania i always will tune in for.

not going to do a long review but i definitely thought this was a fun Wrestlemania. The Cody / Seth match was my favorite of the two nights. The Stone Cold / KO match was fun and the Johnny Knoxville / Zayn was way more entertaining than i anticipated.

Fun show, but the "biggest match in wrestlemania history" really fell short.

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #124 on: April 05, 2022, 02:21:23 AM »

Pretty solid review. I too was wondering about AJ Styles’ face. Not a fan of him so this just added to me thinking this guy is a clown. I felt like the women’s’ matches were solid & did well in terms of creating a powerful division of WWE. The RKBro match ruled & as for the rest, I enjoyed it BUT hated that Reigns won. Deep down I knew that’s going to be the case but I’ve been a fan of Lesnar since his original debut.

Thanks! I was hoping someone would enjoy the golden muscle twink line. I can't believe I forgot to mention rkbro, that match was a lot of fun and the little yelp Ford made after Riddle jumped up on the ropes for the cutter was beautiful.

AJ's cut was like a rug burn with a tiny tear so I think he grazed himself with the punch part of his pose. I went back and slow-mo'ed it later and I'm pretty sure that's what happened. AJ is  very, very dumb but he's a savant in the ring. I haven't been impressed by him recently but I really enjoyed his NJPW run a few years ago.

Women's matches were overall very good, but I absolutely hate the contrived ass corner tower spot in the tag. It was impressive once, now its predictable and takes forever to set up and takes me out of the moment. I could watch Rhea and Sasha chain wrestle all day though. Becky vs Bianca was exactly what it needed to be... Bianca was already a star but it made her a bigger one and Becky is so fucking good I don't think you could bury her if you tried. She's the female HBK.

Reigns was inevitable, the match just sucked. I know Roman got hurt but there always seems to be something that goes wrong with him. I was actually kind of expecting Brock to retire for good afterwards but I guess the money is still too good to walk away from.

But yeah, having seen everything now I can't argue with your Cody - Seth pick for best match. If it weren't for SCSA it would have been my favorite part of the whole weekend. Rollins is Mr. Mania, the dude always has a great match so he was the perfect opponent and I loved how they blended the old school physical storytelling and limb work with modern high spots and flashy offense.

I'm definitely more of a casual wrestling fan these days, but Royal Rumble and Wrestlemania i always will tune in for.

not going to do a long review but i definitely thought this was a fun Wrestlemania. The Cody / Seth match was my favorite of the two nights. The Stone Cold / KO match was fun and the Johnny Knoxville / Zayn was way more entertaining than i anticipated.

Fun show, but the "biggest match in wrestlemania history" really fell short.

I would maybe watch survivor series if they went back to the all star team format from the early years but I'm at the same point - I just don't care about anything except the spectacle events. The storylines are so stale and boring and everything feels so rehearsed and inauthentic that everyone is basically interchangeable and no one really stands out.

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #125 on: April 08, 2022, 10:43:58 AM »
Fell asleep before Dynamite but watching it now. Gonna try to take a break from smoking for a while starting tomorrow so I'm getting good and ripped..

Starting things off with Christian Cage vs Adam Cole. I should be hyped for this but Christian has been pretty boring. Good match but I'm kinda sick of seeing Cole's skinny ass every week.

Oh shit forgot Samoa Joe vs Max Caster was happening. Not a bad verse but Joe is kinda hard to hate on haha. Joe lookin good, cool he busted out the dive and the crowd popped hard as fuck for the muscle buster. Looking forward to him and lethal having a program. I always thought Sonjay Dutt sucked and I guess I still do.

MJF on commentary.. This should be good. Ok yeah it was. Actually wish it was a longer segment. I could watch Wardlow throw security jobbers around all day.

I like Kingston and Santana/Ortiz but the generic "new York tough guy" thing doesn't do much for me. I guess when it's him and Jericho they could talk about anything and get it over so it doesn't really matter, but it feels a little lazy.

Jolly Green Jade Cargill. Did you know she's married to Brandon Phillips? That's probably the most interesting thing about her.

Up next is Hardy boyz vs the PeteDunner and the Blade in an elimination table match. Solid stuff.. Hardyz are nuts, Someone please tell Jeff he doesn't need to do the huge ladder swanton every week. Not just because I don't want him to die but it's also losing its impact a little.

Julia Hart vs Hikaru Shida. Interesting combo. Shida is really good, Julia is really hot. Pretty good match, I don't know if Hart is getting better or Shida just carried her but that was solid.

Swerve with another boring promo to start a segment that existed solely so Keith Lee could pounce someone through a wall (that definitely wasn't built that day for that exact reason).

OK bucks vs FTR 2. FTR has such a bangin theme. Really cool to see the ROH belts being defended on AEW. Nick Jackson has such good timing. That actually mostly lived up to the hype. I like the bucks best when they're working against someone they actually have to wrestle and it's not just a series of flips and dives one after the other. 1-1 now, looking forward to the rubber match..

Apparently sammy and Tay got booed out of the building in Boston when they came out for the sign gimmick and cheered when they left. They have to be leaning into this to get heat, there's no way he's actually this big of a douche right?

Also watched most of ROH supercard of honor. Didn't watch the FTR match because I hate the Briscoes. Minoru Suzuki having a North American title is fucking hilarious, I want him to be on TV every week but I'm honestly not sure if western audiences would "get" him at this point in his career. He just kinda looks like an old Japanese guy making funny faces if you don't know how legit he is.

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #126 on: April 09, 2022, 10:12:00 AM »
Haha just watched Rampage and Sammy and Tay got shit on by the crowd then diced up on the mic by Dan Lambert. It has to be intentional, there's no way they could be this oblivious.

Ricky Starks looks like the rock if he never took steroids.

Just heard they are actually doing Suzuki on TV and it's against Samoa Joe? I'm kinda worried it's going to be disappointing since they're both old but I'm gonna watch.

Main event was pretty good even though Yuta is a nerd. I have to say this though... they need to stop bleeding on every single show. This coming from a guy who binge watches ECW and the territories. Not necessarily here here because Mox is a notorious deathmatch brawler and they wanted to show Yuta being able to hang with him in that style but overall it just feels like that weird period in 97-98 where the WWF was trying to court the ECW fanbase by having blood and chair shots on every show. And as much as I hate to say it, it's kind of wasted on a rampage match. Not a lot of people watch it. Save it for PPV guys.

SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #127 on: April 11, 2022, 08:03:41 AM »
Sorry Buttfart, been on vacation since Mania. Mostly agree with your Mania reviews, Stone Cold was awesome. Was that McAfee's first win in WWE? He's only had the matches with Adam Cole, right? I wish Smackdown was better because I like him on commentary.

Lashley. Man. What terrible booking. They just put in months of work on Omos to have him lose at Mania? Squashing tag teams to lose to Lashley? Unless Bobby taking the belt from Roman, this is pointless.

This may be a hot take, but the star/surprise of the weekend for me was Logan Paul. The kid is a natural heel and looked like he loved the hate. He moved real good in the ring as well. Kid can wrestle. Here's a quote from my wife, "Baby, am I high or was logan Paul's frog splash better than both Mysterio's?" Miz v Paul at Summer Slam could be great, but not sure how Paul would work as a babyface after Miz turned on him.

I actually was entertained by Knoxville, I thought it was great. Not surprised he got the W just because people are loving watching Sami lose. Feeds into the conspiracy gimmick. Props to Knoxville for thinking quick when that final rat trap didn't pop off when he hit the button. He had to spring it manually and almost got caught up in it.

Hope no one actually expected a good match between Brock and Roman.

IMO, the biggest Mania matches of all time are Hogan/Warrior and Hogan/Rock, but my favorite actual Mania match has to be Savage/Flair.

AEW has been real solid. Max Castor spits hard. Bucks v FTR was real sick. HOOK no selling the curse is funny. Agree with you on the blood and Hardy high spots. We don't need to see that every week.

Finally saw a Skye Blue match and holy shit you are right about that ass. She needs to join up with Tay-Jay. She had a decent match too. Still working on some good nicknames for her, right now all I got is "Thigh Blue"

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #128 on: April 12, 2022, 06:47:36 PM »
Sorry Buttfart, been on vacation since Mania. Mostly agree with your Mania reviews, Stone Cold was awesome. Was that McAfee's first win in WWE? He's only had the matches with Adam Cole, right? I wish Smackdown was better because I like him on commentary.

Lashley. Man. What terrible booking. They just put in months of work on Omos to have him lose at Mania? Squashing tag teams to lose to Lashley? Unless Bobby taking the belt from Roman, this is pointless.

This may be a hot take, but the star/surprise of the weekend for me was Logan Paul. The kid is a natural heel and looked like he loved the hate. He moved real good in the ring as well. Kid can wrestle. Here's a quote from my wife, "Baby, am I high or was logan Paul's frog splash better than both Mysterio's?" Miz v Paul at Summer Slam could be great, but not sure how Paul would work as a babyface after Miz turned on him.

I actually was entertained by Knoxville, I thought it was great. Not surprised he got the W just because people are loving watching Sami lose. Feeds into the conspiracy gimmick. Props to Knoxville for thinking quick when that final rat trap didn't pop off when he hit the button. He had to spring it manually and almost got caught up in it.

Hope no one actually expected a good match between Brock and Roman.

IMO, the biggest Mania matches of all time are Hogan/Warrior and Hogan/Rock, but my favorite actual Mania match has to be Savage/Flair.

AEW has been real solid. Max Castor spits hard. Bucks v FTR was real sick. HOOK no selling the curse is funny. Agree with you on the blood and Hardy high spots. We don't need to see that every week.

Finally saw a Skye Blue match and holy shit you are right about that ass. She needs to join up with Tay-Jay. She had a decent match too. Still working on some good nicknames for her, right now all I got is "Thigh Blue"

All good, I hope you had a good vacay and that's a shoot brother. I've been busier with real life stuff so I've only been watching the main shows as well.

I think I heard on one of the podcasts that McAfee had 3 matches in his life going into that one, not sure if he won any though. You're for sure right about Logan Paul too. He's a natural douchebag heel and his whole Eddie impersonation was awesome. Definitely a better frogger than Dom and Rey too, he got tons of hang time and landed it perfectly. The jackass match was great, I know most people wanted Sami to lose and I don't think it was the worst decision but I'm a grouchy old mark who wants it to be somewhat believable and I think it would have been so fucking cool if he just pinned wee man after kicking the fuck out of him like that haha.

Lashley is kinda in the same boat as Jack Swagger for me. Big, athletic, legit, experienced, not great on the mic but can talk enough, looks great, but just boring for whatever reason. No charisma.

Savage/Flair might be the pick dude. I wouldn't have thought of it but now that I did I can't really argue with it haha.

AEW is for sure doing well right now. They've been hitting a lot more than missing. Really the only thing that irritates me is Sammy and Tay but like I said I have a suspicion they're aware and playing it up. I think I mentioned I'm already slightly sick of danhausen haha. Hook looks good in the ring but everything I've seen was pretty short and squashy.

And dude I'm telling you she has like my perfect, ideal ass. She's on dark and elevation all the time and every time I hear her music I'm like "fuck I better pause this and jerk off so I can actually watch the match". She's pretty good in the ring but when she's rolling around doing mat work there's zero chance I can think about anything except how badly I want to be her shorts.



Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #129 on: April 12, 2022, 09:48:28 PM »
CM Punk vs Penta Oscuro on Dynamite. Yes please. Tony playing fantasy match with his real life wrestler toys is always fun and if these two click its going to be amazing.

Edit: Holy shit they're also doing Samoa Joe vs Minoru fuckin Suzuki.
« Last Edit: April 13, 2022, 01:26:05 AM by Buttfart Rapedick »

SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #130 on: April 13, 2022, 05:32:04 AM »
Yeah I gotta remember not to smoke so much later so I can get through Dynamite tonight! HA!

I really like how these random awesome matches are happening with no build and no storyline reason other than to just showcase some amazing wrestling. Sometimes that can naturally create a great fued or storyline that nobody could ever write. Something organic happens in the ring and all of the sudden two guys that have never crossed paths now have a reason to hate each other. That's the shit you build on.

WWE is trying so hard to force these "moments" it just comes off as trash.

Also, they had Lashley beat Omos so now MVP has to turn on Lashley to help Omos get a W? THAT MAN SHOULD NOT NEED  HELP!!!!!

Also a side note, I live in Tampa and Omos played basketball at University of South Florida. My friend runs a tattoo shop in that area and has tattoo'd him a couple times and said he is a real nice guy.

SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #131 on: April 13, 2022, 07:55:56 AM »
Also, not sure if you saw, but Thigh Blue is wrestling Marina Shaffir tonight on Dynamite so get the tissues ready!!!!

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #132 on: April 13, 2022, 07:01:52 PM »
Also, not sure if you saw, but Thigh Blue is wrestling Marina Shaffir tonight on Dynamite so get the tissues ready!!!!

Hahahaha fuck dude, I did see that but didn't get a chance to properly prepare. I'm going to take the opposite approach and smoke so much I'm too lazy to move my arm. I have some
motor breath that tested over 30% so it should be possible.

Punk vs Penta kicking off the show almost feels like a statement... Like our shit is so good we can use this as a kickoff match. Damn that's a hot crowd... Penta is so fucking good. Dude would be a PPV main eventer here too if he could speak English. The match wasn't amazing but it was good for weekly TV. You knew Punk was going to win but they told a good simple story and the finish was nicely done.

ReDragon vs Lucha Express now? This is like a PPV card haha. These 4 could put on a great match in their sleep so unsurprisingly I'm enjoying this haha. That falcon arrow/pin breakup was beautiful and jungle boy is a star even if he's a twink.

I think I'm going to make FTR's theme my ringtone. That shit is bangin.

As much as I make fun of people who signed up for Toni Storm's only fans, if Thigh Blue made one I'd whip my credit card out so fast I'd probably cut myself.

That MJF/Wardlow shit is gold. Wardlow just murdering a line of jobbers is beautiful but I want Max to go over in the end. I feel like that gives them more options.

Trios match should be good too. I feel like I haven't seen Hager wrestle in forever. The cameras finding the JR lookalike singing Judas and JR saying "wait a minute..." cracked me up. I'm going to be so sad when he's gone. Jericho is starting to get that Flair body where he simultaneously looks great and super weird.

Dude. MJF might legitimately be one of the best promos I've ever seen.

What the fuck, they didn't give my girl her entrance. That's bullshit, I actually like her song haha. OK we're not even 30 seconds in and I'm at half mast. Thank God that was a squash, I don't think I'd have made it through a full match.

Not even my hatred of Sammy and Tay can make me want to cheer for Scorpio Sky.

Cool moment there with Ricky Starks getting emotional at the response he got. He's really grown on me, I thought he belonged on dark but he's been really good on rampage. He's still too small and generic to be a main eventer but mid card heel is perfect for him.

I vote we change Keith Lee's leapfrog to the bullfrog. I thought Starks was actually going to get the pin there, it would have been cool to see the crowd explode. I get why they stuck to the script but if someone had called an audible there I don't think anyone would have been pissed.

I was feeling kind of tired until Suzuki walked through the curtain. Murder Grandpa and Joe working a strong style chop fest as the main event on TBS is giving me serious 90's wcw/njpw talent trade vibes. I hope someone goes back and counts the chops when this is all said and done. Good match even if it was obvious what would happen.

Oh cool AEW got a great Khali. As soon as I see a big guy do the head squeeze or the claw I instantly assume they suck and I have a feeling I'm right. What a terrible way to end a great show.





« Last Edit: April 13, 2022, 07:08:40 PM by Buttfart Rapedick »

SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #133 on: April 15, 2022, 05:35:59 AM »
i read yesterday that AEW Khali came out because AEW is doing a big push in India with it's TV partner Eurosport. This is happening after Warner Media merged with Discovery(who owns Eurosport). Satnam Singh and that other guy Sonjay Dutt(guy with Jay Lethal) will be doing a lot of promotion work on the channel in India so they wanted those dudes immediately in a storyline with a known star.

Kinda whack but business is business and if they wanna keep signing these big dudes, they gotta get the money from somewhere. Our darling little indy project is finally succumbing to media deals and corporate pressure.

Oh well, as long as we have Thigh Blue and a pack of tissues we'll be OK.

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #134 on: April 15, 2022, 01:13:32 PM »
i read yesterday that AEW Khali came out because AEW is doing a big push in India with it's TV partner Eurosport. This is happening after Warner Media merged with Discovery(who owns Eurosport). Satnam Singh and that other guy Sonjay Dutt(guy with Jay Lethal) will be doing a lot of promotion work on the channel in India so they wanted those dudes immediately in a storyline with a known star.

Kinda whack but business is business and if they wanna keep signing these big dudes, they gotta get the money from somewhere. Our darling little indy project is finally succumbing to media deals and corporate pressure.

Oh well, as long as we have Thigh Blue and a pack of tissues we'll be OK.

That makes sense, I think every major wrestling company in the last 2 decades has tried to break into India at some point (WWE with Khali and Kinder, TNA with all sorts of wacky shit like ring ka King, didn't ROH have a big tv deal over there too? ) but they all fail somehow. Every time they do this they try to make some bland Indian guy who can't wrestle into the star of the show but my theory is that Indians don't really want to watch Indian wrestlers. A lot of us watch wrestling for something outrageous and exotic, not to see some dude who looks like your neighbor (shout out to the Gargano lookalike down the hall though). I think I mentioned this before but I used to have an irrational hatred of Sonjay Dutt and it doesn't seem to have faded much with time. He just pisses me off for no good reason at all haha.

It does feel like AEW is getting so big so fast that it's lost some of that indy charm, but I guess the idea is that dark and ROH will feature the up and comers, elevation will be for squashes and record padding, and then Dynamite will obviously be the flagship show with rampage as Tony's fantasy match night. I'd much rather they do it this way than go to a 3 hour Dynamite, that would probably be really good sometimes (like when they have a card like they had Wednesday where some of the matches would have benefitted from going longer) but I could see it wearing me down fast. I don't even know if I could do 3 hours of classic ECW in one sitting regularly and that's my favorite wrestling ever.

Speaking of amazing wrestling asses, I wonder what ivelisse is up to these days.


Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #135 on: April 17, 2022, 04:02:58 PM »
Holy fucking shit CM Punk vs Dustin Rhodes in Pittsburgh! I assume this is opening the show and both guys called it a dream match so I'm hoping Tony let's them have like 20 minutes. So stoked I get to see Dustin, he doesn't wrestle all that often anymore but when he does it's usually really good.

SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #136 on: April 18, 2022, 05:20:05 AM »
I absolutely 100% DO NOT want a 3 hour dynamite. I usually don't make it to 10pm as it is, and I like it now because every minute on that show counts.

I forgot Rampage started early on Friday so I missed that, but Battle of the Belts on Saturday was pretty sick, even though I know you are pissed that Sammy G got the belt back. Gresham and Castle was pretty sick.

IvelASSe is the current champion in Shine Wrestling.

It's amazing how good in the ring Dustin still is at 53.

I heard a rumor that AEW is planning a big crossover show with NJPW coming up.

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #137 on: April 18, 2022, 11:51:54 AM »
I absolutely 100% DO NOT want a 3 hour dynamite. I usually don't make it to 10pm as it is, and I like it now because every minute on that show counts.

I forgot Rampage started early on Friday so I missed that, but Battle of the Belts on Saturday was pretty sick, even though I know you are pissed that Sammy G got the belt back. Gresham and Castle was pretty sick.

IvelASSe is the current champion in Shine Wrestling.

It's amazing how good in the ring Dustin still is at 53.

I heard a rumor that AEW is planning a big crossover show with NJPW coming up.

Yeah Tony is teasing one of his "huge announcements" for Wednesday and that seems to be the rumor that makes the most sense. I would love for it to be like Shaq vs Big Show or something that no one expects haha.

I missed rampage and BOTB but I downloaded and watched them yesterday instead. I actually don't mind them putting the belt on Sammy because I still don't think Scorpio is good enough to be champ and it looks like they're leaning into the "everyone hates sammy" thing pretty heavily. I don't really mind it as long as everyone keeps booing him. It would be really nice to have Keith Lee squash him like a bug for the belt next ppv though. I would suggest pouncing him out of the ring through a table but Sammy would just sell it for 10 seconds then pop up and do some flippy shit.

Dude words can't describe how excited I am for Dustin. The guy I was going to go with is probably going to have to work so I was thinking about giving my tickets away and just watching on tv but once they announced Punk vs Dustin there was no way Im missing it. I know he's going to lose but I don't care as long as I get to see the best powerslam in the business.


SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #138 on: April 19, 2022, 05:39:18 AM »
Anybody listen to Talk is Jericho podcast? It's really good.

PatrickSkateman

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #139 on: April 19, 2022, 08:44:43 AM »
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPwS9MNlhEP/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPovS9_FquL/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPjUxzglb28/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPRIJHkl5rc/

Check out these wrestling collages that I make. Holla at me for the Slap Pals discount. If you have a certain wrestler you would like immortalized in collage form, let me know and I can see what I can do.

Can you do random WCW jobbers?
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SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #140 on: April 19, 2022, 09:29:46 AM »
Expand Quote
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPwS9MNlhEP/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPovS9_FquL/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPjUxzglb28/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPRIJHkl5rc/

Check out these wrestling collages that I make. Holla at me for the Slap Pals discount. If you have a certain wrestler you would like immortalized in collage form, let me know and I can see what I can do.
[close]

Can you do random WCW jobbers?

Damn that would be tough because I only have WWF/WWE magazines. And there probably aren't good printed photos of those dudes. I'll look through my supplies and see if I can come up with anything. Great idea!

PatrickSkateman

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #141 on: April 19, 2022, 10:54:32 AM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPwS9MNlhEP/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPovS9_FquL/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPjUxzglb28/
https://www.instagram.com/p/CPRIJHkl5rc/

Check out these wrestling collages that I make. Holla at me for the Slap Pals discount. If you have a certain wrestler you would like immortalized in collage form, let me know and I can see what I can do.
[close]

Can you do random WCW jobbers?
[close]

Damn that would be tough because I only have WWF/WWE magazines. And there probably aren't good printed photos of those dudes. I'll look through my supplies and see if I can come up with anything. Great idea!

When I went to the last Dime Glory Challenge, we hit up this bar on Saint Laurent that had collages from PWI in the early 90’s as bathroom wallpaper. It was dope.
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SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #142 on: April 19, 2022, 12:00:32 PM »
OH shit i do think I have some old PWI or other ones but damn they so old I would feel bad cutting them up.

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #143 on: April 20, 2022, 01:38:41 PM »
Tonight's the big night. They just released a batch of tickets on ticket master this morning, so I was actually able to sell the pair of seats i had for what I paid, then upgrade to a floor seat. I'm not sure which side the hard cam is on so I don't know if I'll be on camera much but keep an eye out for a generic white guy who looks like he hasn't gotten laid in a long time, I'm sure I'll be easy to spot.

I was thinking about making a shalom sign just to get a pop from SHAQUEEFA and any other pals that watch but I don't feel like explaining to strangers that it has nothing to do with MJF or the tree of life. Also really don't want to make myself any kind of target for MJF haha.

Looking forward to seeing how different Dynamite is in person, I haven't been to a major wrestling show in decades. Matches I'm most excited for in order

Darby vs Andrade coffin match - sk8r Boi wrestler vs one of the best but most underrated wrestlers in the company

Jungle boy vs Kyle O'Reilly - Jungle Boy is the future. KOR has an annoying doucheface but he can go. This is my dark horse for highlight of the night.

And obviously Punk vs Dustin is the reason I'm going. Childhood favorite vs the modern Randy Savage. I don't even care if it sucks but I'm pretty confident it won't.



Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #144 on: April 21, 2022, 12:26:12 AM »
What a night. Dustin vs Punk did NOT disappoint me at all. Wild shit though, did not think we were going to get a fucking balcony dive from the 63 year old stinger! I'm going to watch the broadcast and see what I missed. I took some notes but I was higher than I've been in a long time so everything is kind of a blur.

All I have right now is Britt talking about how great she is on the mic and then stumbling over her words is the most Pittsburgh thing I can think of. And Najee Harris is fucking THICK.

Edit - I didn't show up until Dynamite so I missed the surprise match. I don't want to spoil anything but if you're a smarky IWC  type like myself then it's worth watching Elevation this week.

« Last Edit: April 21, 2022, 04:59:59 AM by Buttfart Rapedick »

SHAQUEEFA

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #145 on: April 21, 2022, 08:25:58 AM »
I missed the Punk match I was driving home. My friend texted me and said "Where the fuck is Dustin's blood?" He said it was short and kinda sloppy and Dustin hurt his knee early on and Punk had trouble lifting him up for the GTS.

Rest of the show was kinda ehhhhhh except for the coffin match.

Britt Baker fumbling her lines after she praised herself for mic work had me laughing. Her insults weren't very good either.

Having Adam Cole make the announcement was a miss. this huge announcement to partner with New Japan and its announced by a white dude. Then another white dude comes out (Jay White.) Like damn, let the Japanese guy make the announcement. They could have had him try to interrupt and then Ishii could have come out and knocked him out, setting up the match for Friday. But man, this PPV will be awesome as I'm not super familiar with the New Japan roster. I love Suzuki and one of his nicknames is Murder Grandpa. That Suzuki v. Samoa Joe match was fucking awesome.

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #146 on: April 22, 2022, 06:00:08 AM »
I missed the Punk match I was driving home. My friend texted me and said "Where the fuck is Dustin's blood?" He said it was short and kinda sloppy and Dustin hurt his knee early on and Punk had trouble lifting him up for the GTS.

Rest of the show was kinda ehhhhhh except for the coffin match.

Britt Baker fumbling her lines after she praised herself for mic work had me laughing. Her insults weren't very good either.

Having Adam Cole make the announcement was a miss. this huge announcement to partner with New Japan and its announced by a white dude. Then another white dude comes out (Jay White.) Like damn, let the Japanese guy make the announcement. They could have had him try to interrupt and then Ishii could have come out and knocked him out, setting up the match for Friday. But man, this PPV will be awesome as I'm not super familiar with the New Japan roster. I love Suzuki and one of his nicknames is Murder Grandpa. That Suzuki v. Samoa Joe match was fucking awesome.

Yeah you have no idea how pissed I was that I missed seeing a live Suzuki match. I was walking down the hill from where I smoked/stashed my board and heard Kaze Ni Nare but it was at the end so obviously everything was done by the time I got in.

Dustin vs Punk was great in my opinion, even removing as much bias as I can. It was old school storytelling and limb work, so that may be what turned your friend off. They worked both of the injuries into the story and the finish and did it well enough people in the crowd got worked and thought he was actually hurt. It actually went longer than I thought it would (I'm pretty sure they went over their slot) I would guess 12-15 minutes or so of actual wrestling and they did slow down and get a little sloppy at  the end but I felt like it worked really well with the finish. You should def watch it, I think you'll dig it. Also thought it was cool that Dustin came out last

I was fucking pissed KOR won but I guess they needed to give him some credibility. He was like no-selling stuff to transition into submissions and it kinda took me out of it. Jungle Boy was great as usual but I think their styles just don't work that well together in a singles match.

The NJPW announcement seemed like a bit of a cluster fuck, I'm wondering if they cut part of it because they were behind on time or something. Adam Cole doing his little "ah-ah" stutter before every other thing he says drives me crazy.

Here's some of my stoned notes from the night -

Incredible how much Eddie Kingston sounds like Bender from Futurama when you're in the bathroom.

Jake looks like shit. Holy fuck.

Hook is pretty fucking skinny. Danhausen is potentially skinnier.

Wardlow is fucking gigantic. His legs are legit the size of my waist.

Brock Anderson's spine buster was cringeworthy, Moxley kinda sucks in the ring, and Wheeler Yuta is apparently very popular with the leathery wannabe cougars chain-smoking misty menthols by the garbage can. Maybe he's like Thigh Blue for dirty old women?

I need to rewatch it because there's honestly a lot I don't remember/missed. I was on the other side from where most of the crowd stuff happened so I didn't see a lot of the coffin match.

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #147 on: April 28, 2022, 07:28:00 AM »
What did everyone think of Dynamite?

I wasn't paying good enough attention during the FTR singles match, I was still cooking dinner.

Poor Lance Archer. Dude is supposed to be this monster and they keep having him lose. Decent enough match and Wardlow is definitely improving, but damn. I thought it would be a DQ because the premise was MJF stating he did not care if Lance lost, as long as he decimated Wardlow. Figured that would be the story instead of the powerbomb symphony. Now Big Cass is coming to handle biz? It would be hilarious if just Enzo comes out and tries to fuck up Wardlow. At least I have a reason to wear my "You SAWFT" shirt now. HA!

So Hikaru Shida wants to be sexy now? I'm with it. But a "Philly Street Fight" should have made it outside the general ring area. There should have actually been a street involved.

Undisputed Elite is about the wackest shit I've ever heard. It sucks the Bucks are so good and I can't stand them just because of their association to Cole/KOR/Fish. 10 man was meh and I know Dante Martin is real good, but I want to punch is stupid looking face every time he tries to make a crazy facial expression.

So you telling me two dudes fell on that barbwire ladder and neither broke skin? I know we have said they bleed too much on Dynamite, but if you busting out the barb, you better make it worth it. Otherwise, it makes me think its plastic. Like how TF did Sammy not get cut? Bareback big drop right to the wire and nothing? And dude, I been paying attention to his selling, and Buttfart you are absolutely right. He takes the biggest bumps and no sells them and is immediately up and jumping and sticking that nasty tongue down a throat he does not deserve.

Glad Scorpio got a little pop when he won, but I think it was more of an anti-Sammy pop than a pro-Scorpio one.

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #148 on: April 29, 2022, 08:53:17 PM »
I haven't watched wrestling since the mid 90s but Mick Foley is gonna be at the local comedy club this weekend. Might go check him out and hear wrestling stories. Motherfuckin Mankind...
If you plant ice, you’re gonna harvest wind

Sativa Lung

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Re: The Official Professional Wrestling Thread
« Reply #149 on: April 30, 2022, 06:04:21 PM »
I haven't watched wrestling since the mid 90s but Mick Foley is gonna be at the local comedy club this weekend. Might go check him out and hear wrestling stories. Motherfuckin Mankind...


If you haven't read his first book it's one of the best autobiographies I've ever read and one of my favorite books ever. You don't even have to be a wrestling fan, it's just a really charming dude telling his story.

That being said I've been told his standup is pretty awful, but that's from smarky wrestling fans so it might be different for human beings.