Author Topic: Skateboard Standup Jokes  (Read 2368 times)

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chris

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #30 on: October 11, 2021, 08:01:29 PM »

RoaryMcTwang

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #31 on: October 11, 2021, 09:19:30 PM »
Why did Ben Nordberg say yes when Mikey Taylor asked him to ride for SOVRN?

He didnít want to look a gift horse in the mouth.


Lou Strux

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #32 on: October 11, 2021, 10:08:47 PM »
Why did Ben Nordberg say yes when Mikey Taylor asked him to ride for SOVRN?

He didnít want to look a gift horse in the mouth.
True enough; you NEVER inspect the present ponyís hay hole.

Joey Tershay is a Nigerian prince (and Ace loves him!)

RoaryMcTwang

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #33 on: October 11, 2021, 11:04:01 PM »
Expand Quote
Why did Ben Nordberg say yes when Mikey Taylor asked him to ride for SOVRN?

He didnít want to look a gift horse in the mouth.
[close]
True enough; you NEVER inspect the present ponyís hay hole.

The routine then continues like this:

Still, Ben has second thoughts and asks, Mikey, are you sure you know how to run a board company?
Mikey answers: Donít you worry. This isnít my first rodeo!
« Last Edit: October 11, 2021, 11:54:17 PM by RoaryMcTwang »

SharkJohnson

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #34 on: October 11, 2021, 11:52:46 PM »
dude 1- have you seen Dan Mancina's new video part?
guy 2- no
dude 1- neither has he. kaboom

SharkJohnson

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #35 on: October 12, 2021, 12:15:13 AM »
when did Jason Jesse start feeling Independent as a child? When he IronCrossed the street by himself

Pho King Hung Lo Mein

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #36 on: October 12, 2021, 12:20:04 AM »
Naked blonde walks into a bar with a skateboard under one arm and a 2 foot salami under the other.

Leaves the board on the table. 

Bartender says, "I suppose you won't be needing a drink".

Naked lady says...
"Now go home and get your fucking Shinebox"

JohnBolton

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #37 on: October 12, 2021, 12:20:50 AM »
How many skaters does it take to change a lightning? three one to do it, one to film it and one to spot and high five the one that did it.

SharkJohnson

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #38 on: October 12, 2021, 12:31:36 AM »
which skater has the thinnest penis? Dan Pensyldick

Lucky_Basek

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #39 on: October 12, 2021, 01:43:00 AM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Why did Ben Nordberg say yes when Mikey Taylor asked him to ride for SOVRN?

He didnít want to look a gift horse in the mouth.
[close]
True enough; you NEVER inspect the present ponyís hay hole.
[close]

The routine then continues like this:

Still, Ben has second thoughts and asks, Mikey, are you sure you know how to run a board company?
Mikey answers: Donít you worry. This isnít my first rodeo!

Mikey Taylor walks into a bar.

Bartender: "why the long face?"

Lucky_Basek

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #40 on: October 12, 2021, 01:49:44 AM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
Why did Ben Nordberg say yes when Mikey Taylor asked him to ride for SOVRN?

He didnít want to look a gift horse in the mouth.
[close]
True enough; you NEVER inspect the present ponyís hay hole.
[close]

The routine then continues like this:

Still, Ben has second thoughts and asks, Mikey, are you sure you know how to run a board company?
Mikey answers: Donít you worry. This isnít my first rodeo!
[close]

Mikey Taylor walks into a bar.

Bartender: "why the long face?"

The next night.

Mikey Taylor walks into a bar.

Bartender: "You're back. Still with the long face?'

Taylor glares at him over his pint of St Archer.

Mikey: "Alex Midler just quit".

Bartender: "Holy crap! A talking horse!"

Letsfilmavideo

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #41 on: October 12, 2021, 04:46:31 AM »
So I sees this kid I says to him I says that I sees him so I told em to tell tell him that I says I sees hims I says he says to tell him he says he sees me I sees him and Iím like come on bro I tells him I sees him and ha whatdayaknow I tell I sees
I always got one of my boys holdin a jar of leak and a fat blunt, so as soon as i land the trick we gettin wet you know?

arthurspooner

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #42 on: October 12, 2021, 05:25:01 AM »

SneakySecrets

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #43 on: October 12, 2021, 10:50:57 AM »
According to inside sources, Jamie Foy is apparently looking for a new primary care physician.

When asked for comment, Foy stated that the final straw was when the doctor grabbed his stethoscope and asked for Foy to ďopen wide and say oink.Ē
Shoe size: 6.5
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donkey

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #44 on: October 12, 2021, 10:59:54 AM »
i laughed so hard my asshole exploded. then i went online and bought a pair of glassy brand gamer eyeglasses. thank you Mike Mo and thank you sneaky secrets
Hahaha

layzieyez

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #45 on: October 12, 2021, 11:02:56 AM »
I made a limerick instead

There once was a skater named Weck
Who would spout only internet dreck
He made slurs about trans
though Weck's a hormone made man
probably lurking in a windowless van.
I take everything I said back. The board hit me in the nuts for the first time ever today, because i was wearing these shits.

TastyBurrito

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #46 on: October 12, 2021, 11:24:39 AM »
Naked blonde walks into a bar with a skateboard under one arm and a 2 foot salami under the other.

Leaves the board on the table. 

Bartender says, "I suppose you won't be needing a drink".

Naked lady says...


TastyBurrito

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #47 on: October 12, 2021, 11:27:43 AM »
Did you know that Nyjah and David Loy are romantics?

They put the "sensual" back into "consensual sex."

IpathCats

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #48 on: October 12, 2021, 11:33:24 AM »
Camp woodward something something, neverland ranch... idk.
.....Nah

mj23

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #49 on: October 12, 2021, 12:21:05 PM »
I made a limerick instead

There once was a skater named Weck
Who would spout only internet dreck
He made slurs about trans
though Weck's a hormone made man
probably lurking in a windowless van.
the syllable count is off but this is still gold, a+

TheLurper

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #50 on: October 12, 2021, 12:28:04 PM »
How many skaters does it take to change a lightning? three one to do it, one to film it and one to spot and high five the one that did it.

Ah, I came here to post the N. American version of this.

SLAP came up with a few versions of this that were pretty good. My fav was:

...1, but it takes 50 tries.

Quote from: ChuckRamone
I love when people bring up world hunger. It makes everything meaningless.
"that guy is double parked."
"Who cares? there are people starving to death! besides, how does that affect you? does it lessen the joy of parking?

straight

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #51 on: October 12, 2021, 01:26:30 PM »
Camp woodward something something, neverland ranch... idk.

what time is curfew at woodward?

when the big hand touches the little hand

cucktard

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #52 on: October 12, 2021, 05:40:48 PM »
Garyís dig at Koston was the first time Iíve laughed hard at his schtick in a while

https://youtu.be/Yiv2CLZZsSk
Iím trying to be every momís favorite skaterí-&&

&& is no stranger to the female species. Hes always got some travel pussy with him in his slambulance. -Hateboard


IpathCats

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #53 on: October 13, 2021, 04:51:37 AM »
Expand Quote
Camp woodward something something, neverland ranch... idk.
[close]

what time is curfew at woodward?

when the big hand touches the little hand



Lol
.....Nah

SneakySecrets

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #54 on: October 13, 2021, 03:34:24 PM »
Pizza?  Glue?   Bacon?  Heroin?

Are these skateboard companies or my in-lawís breakfast menu!?
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coldbrew

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #55 on: October 13, 2021, 05:30:17 PM »
I made a limerick instead

There once was a skater named Weck
Who would spout only internet dreck
He made slurs about trans
though Weck's a hormone made man
probably lurking in a windowless van.

Sang this in dollins drunk baker2g intro voice.

sus

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #56 on: October 13, 2021, 05:39:20 PM »
on a scale from 1-10 .. how old is fetty potters girlfriend

'insert crying face emoji x3'

american.worm

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #57 on: October 13, 2021, 05:44:07 PM »
what if you ran an AI on this thread thats trying to learn humor

matty_c

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #58 on: October 14, 2021, 03:32:05 AM »
Whatís up with Castillo like how heís perpetually twelve years old
Oh yeah he hasnít got a dad

Itís a joke I ainít got one either ahaha
listen to cosmic psychos

IpathCats

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Re: Skateboard Standup Jokes
« Reply #59 on: October 14, 2021, 05:44:36 AM »
Why did berra wait to cross the road?

Because Xenu better than to cross before traffic stopped.
.....Nah