Shecks about to get his fuck on

[slapcurbsnotwomen]

Can’t wait for the next episode of the life of ryan

[Uncle Jeffrey]

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How do two people date and live together for a long time without at some point getting horny enough to just do it? I don't really believe that. Do they like sleep in separate beds? Also kinda awkward how you know that everyone in the wedding will be thinking about how that first time is going while you're doing it

[close]

I was raised in what I would categorize as fundamentalist christianity and I'll tell you straight that almost everyone just lies about it. Everyone jerks off and everyone has sex of some kind with the person they marry.

That being said if your shit is/was more culty than mine, I have no idea... do the cult members on compounds do it? No clue.

[close]

Yeah, no one really goes through with that from what I've seen. In fact those types of girls are the craziest ones in bed.

My highschool bud did. I was in his first wedding at like 20 years old. He used to bang but got a sports scholarship to some crazy fundy college and literally stopped having sex with her because of it. So instead he proposed, got married too young, had kids because the love was faltering, then finally got divorced after years of anger

Oh and another youth group guy I was almost friends with, also married his highschool sweetheart (still married though) but he swears to this day he never jerked the gerkin or anything. They'd literally make out in his car for hours and he said it never got sexual, and he never released afterwards lol.

[versacekid420]

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Etnies are an aphrodisiac to OC chicks

[close]

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[close]

if etnies brought the rap vulcs back i’ll go back to my prepubescent malto phase

[livin on a speyer]

Imagine being proposed to by a guy in etnies.

Way better than in Nikes.

[backside_reacharound]

do you think shecks will try to hit the ass pipe on the first go-round or will he save that?

[Matze]

Poophole loophole

I'm not too old to learn new expressions.

[OldSkater]

That's nice, no more bachelor life for Shecks. No more leaving the toilet bowl dirty, eating Unico beans out of a can for dinner, burping and farting out loud, pinup girl calendars, puttering around in his tattered underclothes, playing Leisure Suit Larry for hours on end. He's gonna miss it.

i havent thought about leisure suit larry in decades

[behavioralguide]

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Poophole loophole

[close]

I'm not too old to learn new expressions.

[stevedave]

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That's nice, no more bachelor life for Shecks. No more leaving the toilet bowl dirty, eating Unico beans out of a can for dinner, burping and farting out loud, pinup girl calendars, puttering around in his tattered underclothes, playing Leisure Suit Larry for hours on end. He's gonna miss it.

[close]

i havent thought about leisure suit larry in decades

I do often because my dog's name is Larry and sometimes I introduce him as Leisure Suit Larry

[jerrygurneyscream]

Imagine being proposed to by a guy in etnies.

And volcom chinos, and when he lifts his shirt the ethika waistband peeks out

[DannyDee]

Imagine being proposed to by a guy in etnies.

A famous NHL player who is known as a bit of an enigma is wearing etnies in his girlfriends pregnancy shoot.

[Lowcalcium]

Divorce when she finds out he lied about El Toro bs flip

I wonder since he found God and his eternal soul-mate, and god's on his side now, if he will step to El Toro again

[numagik]

no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

[DannyDee]

no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

Love the guy, just a complete enigma.

[h00man]

is it me, or are millennial wedding/pregnancy photos so cringe?

[Donkey Lips]

no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

Hate the penguins but I acknowledge Phil Kessel shall be protected at all costs.

[Ankle_Lift]

I get that he's excited, but that second photo is like the goofiest shit. Looks like a chimp when a chimp gets excited from smelling farts or something.

Can someone Photoshop is face onto a chimpanzee's body, or like some other goofy shit?

[Rocuronium]

SORRY!!!!!:

Good luck, hope you're both happy forever.

Thanks Shecks for everything he's done for the New Orleans DYI, for example buying everything at the DIY merch. table  at the end of the demo and  product tossing it all away.

Those of us who have weird feet don't have the luxury of choosing what shoes look coolest to wear. We gotta go with whatever doesn't cause cramps, blisters, and overriding toes. If that's you, Etnies makes the widest skate shoes that accommodate for high step-ins.

Watch all of those El Toro bails. He landed bolts on a few, but reached the limits of what his musculoskeleton could absorb. Riding away from one of those would have been much easier than trying again. Going for it all those tries is really sick.

[muntcuscle]

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no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

[close]

Love the guy, just a complete enigma.

Phil the thrill

[Madam, I'm Adam]

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no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

[close]

Love the guy, just a complete enigma.

Why is he an enigma? Genuinely curious. I looked at his wiki page and didn't see anything too weird. I guess he loves poker.

[muntcuscle]

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no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

[close]

Love the guy, just a complete enigma.

[close]

Why is he an enigma? Genuinely curious. I looked at his wiki page and didn't see anything too weird. I guess he loves poker.

[DannyDee]

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no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

[close]

Love the guy, just a complete enigma.

[close]

Why is he an enigma? Genuinely curious. I looked at his wiki page and didn't see anything too weird. I guess he loves poker.

He signed in Toronto (the craziest media market in hockey) despite being somewhat anti-social/weird interview. He pretty much only focused on scoring goals/offence ignoring many other aspects of the game to the extent it would drive coaches and teammates nuts (hence Malkin and Crosby wanting him out of Pitt). It was long rumored he basically lived off hot-dogs (exaggerated) and looked constantly out of shape despite somehow dominating the team athletic testing.

I dunno, I live in Toronto and closely follow the Leafs. The Phil Kessel experience was a weird but always interesting ride.

[Madam, I'm Adam]

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no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

[close]

Love the guy, just a complete enigma.

[close]

Why is he an enigma? Genuinely curious. I looked at his wiki page and didn't see anything too weird. I guess he loves poker.

[close]

He signed in Toronto (the craziest media market in hockey) despite being somewhat anti-social/weird interview. He pretty much only focused on scoring goals/offence ignoring many other aspects of the game to the extent it would drive coaches and teammates nuts (hence Malkin and Crosby wanting him out of Pitt). It was long rumored he basically lived off hot-dogs (exaggerated) and looked constantly out of shape despite somehow dominating the team athletic testing.

I dunno, I live in Toronto and closely follow the Leafs. The Phil Kessel experience was a weird but always interesting ride.

Haha, wow. Thank you. Imagine all those hot dogs...

[pugmaster]

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How can you say “no sex before marriage” when you’ve already had sex before marriage?

[close]

[close]

In the Judaeo-Christian sense, I think it is on a hole to hole basis. Sorry to sound crass. Out of respect to the bride, do NOT reduplicate her face and mirror it so that it creates a perfect half pipe.

[close]

oops

DAGGUMMIT BRAD! What did we talk about in the car?

[DannyDee]

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no one is allowed to talk shit about Phil. he is peak athletic perfection

[close]

Love the guy, just a complete enigma.

[close]

Why is he an enigma? Genuinely curious. I looked at his wiki page and didn't see anything too weird. I guess he loves poker.

[close]

He signed in Toronto (the craziest media market in hockey) despite being somewhat anti-social/weird interview. He pretty much only focused on scoring goals/offence ignoring many other aspects of the game to the extent it would drive coaches and teammates nuts (hence Malkin and Crosby wanting him out of Pitt). It was long rumored he basically lived off hot-dogs (exaggerated) and looked constantly out of shape despite somehow dominating the team athletic testing.

I dunno, I live in Toronto and closely follow the Leafs. The Phil Kessel experience was a weird but always interesting ride.

[close]

Haha, wow. Thank you. Imagine all those hot dogs...

[cucktard]

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Poophole loophole

[close]

I'm not too old to learn new expressions.

[close]

If I may be so bold, but I assert this is a vastly superior take on the same subject matter

[EvenStevieNicks]

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How do two people date and live together for a long time without at some point getting horny enough to just do it? I don't really believe that. Do they like sleep in separate beds? Also kinda awkward how you know that everyone in the wedding will be thinking about how that first time is going while you're doing it

[close]

I was raised in what I would categorize as fundamentalist christianity and I'll tell you straight that almost everyone just lies about it. Everyone jerks off and everyone has sex of some kind with the person they marry.

That being said if your shit is/was more culty than mine, I have no idea... do the cult members on compounds do it? No clue.

[close]

Yeah, no one really goes through with that from what I've seen. In fact those types of girls are the craziest ones in bed.

[close]

My highschool bud did. I was in his first wedding at like 20 years old. He used to bang but got a sports scholarship to some crazy fundy college and literally stopped having sex with her because of it. So instead he proposed, got married too young, had kids because the love was faltering, then finally got divorced after years of anger

Oh and another youth group guy I was almost friends with, also married his highschool sweetheart (still married though) but he swears to this day he never jerked the gerkin or anything. They'd literally make out in his car for hours and he said it never got sexual, and he never released afterwards lol.

Ah, the song of my people! *sighs in religious trauma*

[Shuh]

I imagining that robot chicken sketch about west world haha

[ziggy]

is it me, or are millennial wedding/pregnancy photos so cringe?

it’s not you

[Willie]

Marrying a person you’ve never had sex with is literally the same as playing Russian Roulette - it just takes longer to observe the result.