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I don’t like to be confrontational but I have to ask this straight because there’s no other way to address it.
I’ve been here reading the board, clicking around different topics, while trying to decide in the back of my mind how much of a donation I could make to you. I am an orphan and I was almost homeless once so I get it.
Meanwhile, you’ve been on here talking about your upcoming tattoo appointment and guitar accessories you plan to buy.
Am I missing something?
I bought the tattoo before Covid I waited over 18 months before hitting the chair. I’m supporting skater owned business too that supported all of skateboarding.
It needed to happen. I was not going to move forward with that tattoo. I saved like crazy and put like 100 bucks a month into that for 6 months.
The guitar was definitely a mistake. When I got the news I had it too many days to return to pawn. Definitely was like damn. Especially now my car is an issue.
Good thing school is remote.
Things were not supposed to happen quickly like this. I definitely put myself in it and I’m on my way out of it because of pals and amazing counselors and my drive to get there.
Yo It’s ok if you don’t wanna donate pal. I didn’t think anyone was going to really do It’s no big deal. I asked for help I got help. It’s a rare thing and a beautiful thing.
I thought about hitting the return button on the cash.
I don’t feel like I deserve it.
I feel like I don’t deserve housing sometimes.
It’s going to be a positive thing for more than myself.
I’m going to pass it forward when its my turn to step up like always and keep it moving in a positive space.
I understand where you’re coming from for sure.
I was going to PM this to you but it might be better for everyone to see it.
I was in a similar spot a decade ago. Was strung out, had just gotten out of jail so my car was impounded, and I had nowhere to go so I was sitting in parking garage stairwell (to get out of the cold, it was late November) reading a newspaper. The world had utterly kicked my ass after I got out of the military. This older lady walked past, stopped, turned around, and then walked back and handed me a $50 bill. She didn't say anything... I was so shocked I think I mumbled "ya sure?!" and then she was gone.
Normally I would have gone straight to a dealer and probably been back in that stairwell nodding off an hour later, but this time I went across the street to subway and got a hot sandwich, a pack of smokes, and then gave the rest to my friend who let me crash with him. I wish I could say that I stopped then and there but I didn't... It took a few more months and a lot more misery before I actually went to rehab, but that moment was one of the first times I can remember actually moving in the right direction after years of free fall. There was some intangible change in me and it started a wave of better decision making that started slow but gained momentum and eventually took me to shore. Sometimes it just takes someone giving you a helping hand and a little hope to get that wave started.
So don't feel guilty about this. I am super lucky that I had the VA to provide me with resources when I needed them, but not everyone has something like that to catch them when they fall. Every single person whos donating is doing it out of love and because they know you got this homie. You do what you need to do, and do it how you need to do it. As long as you're moving in the right direction that's all that matters.
Thanks pal. I’m glad we’re ok today. I enjoy your company on slap.
This is my moment to finish turning everything around. Slap made that possible. I’m glad I stopped being against charity type help. There was no way out of this situation but you all provided one.
Idk what else to say except I appreciate all of you and I hope I can bring something to the table when any of you need help.
The direction things are going I will be able to back up pals in the future.
I’m pretty sure I’ll have some news very soon.
I’m trying to settle all this before Tuesday.
I just gotta cash in all these deposit recipes.
All my denials are because of credit scores. I’ve never attempted to build credit. Idk how to even find out what my score is. I tried credit karma but I’m invisible.
That’s going to be my next project after I finish school and get my new job.
Everyone corrects me and career.
I’m just going to part time it. Take it easy and continue schooling.
I want to be a real all the way Drug Counselor.
I would like to be Skateboarding’s own Dr Drew?
I think that’s the guy who used to help save the lives of celebrities around la.
I wanna help our people. From our Patron Saints here at slap to the Olympians on the tv. Most important I wanna help the regular lifer skateboard enthusiast who is suffering as I do.
Imagine you’re having a tough time and you call your TM and they give you Dr Flea’s number. They say he’s the real deal. Don’t worry about money he will get you started towards recovery.
The skater’s thinking to themselves I can’t stand counseling I don’t need his help everyone’s against me and no one understands what I’m going through. I’m going to lose my place in skateboarding. I can fix it later I need to press onward.
I definitely felt like this. I went from being the kid who ripped that everyone asked who do you ride for to being the junky who blew it
to the old ex con homeless guy who’s just happy that he can still skate.
They call and I pick up the phone and I say hey I’m at the spot practicing my backside flip fakie manny. why don’t you come on down we can start to work this out? I’ll wait for you.
They come down we get a coffee and figure out how to do this before they lose sight of their hopes and dreams.
This would be the greatest contribution to skateboarding I can possibly think of.
There’s thousands of people who are just like me and I can help them. I know this to be true.
I can help everyone I just need to stay focused and keep an open mind. Now that I have housing coming it’s one last obstacle in my way.
I’m so glad that this worked out. I’m eternally grateful. I love all of you and nothing can ever come between that.
I’m going to pass it forward like I’m going to die if I don’t do so.
I frickin got to. I owe the world especially the skateboarding world my life.
My skateboard became my higher power officially in 1997 at my first program. They tried to deny me that but I stuck with it and I’m alive today because of it. I need to bring that to others who desire it too.
Anyway I don’t have time to edit or anything I gotta get all the stuff handled.
I’m going to go back and individually tank everyone who donated via computer. My phone doesn’t like the gfm thank individual box.
It types one letter per 5 or 6 seconds. They should fix that if it happens to others. I feel like Thanking everyone at once is not good enough for what I received from my community from my people.