Father of two here. Kids are now 5 and 7. A few things come to mind:
- Agree with the guy above - it might feel like making a bond is hard, but don't give up. Spending time with your little one is a gift and time really passes way too fast. I used to go for long walks with my son every weekend (obviously, he was in the stroller, and his mom was catching up on sleep) from the beginning and these are memories that I cherish dearly.
- Talk to the baby. Yes, it will take years before they answer anything back, but my oldest said "dad" when he was 8 months old (that's very early, in case you didn't know
) and from then on I knew he was listening to what I told him. I used to talk about what I saw, about the weather, explain what I was doing... it feels strange at first, but after a while you'll actually like it. And believe me, they do pay attention - one day you'll notice.
- If you're a normal Joe with a normal 9-5 job, think of this: ideally, you'll sleep 8 hours a night, and spend 8 hours at work - the remaining 8 hours you'll be busy commuting, cleaning, doing groceries, helping out at home - so how do you want to spend your time that you're not sleeping or working? I personally narrowed down both hobbies and "friendships" with people that I realized were not that important (I still have good close friends), in order to spend more time with the kids - and still today have 0 regrets. Be selective as to where you'll spend time for the next years, because one day the kid(s) will be out of the nest and then you can't turn back time - but you'll have time again for other stuff. (It's important though, for both parents, to have their own activities away from home as well, don't overdo it)
- Remember to maintain the special relationship to your partner. Life is not only diapers and milk bottles - try to make her feel special, help her out whenever possible, and if only possible - go on dinner dates etc together.
Good luck, you've got this!