Credit Card Advice

[wompwomp]

warning: the following has nothing to do with credit cards, rather, getting credit carded. Some of the descriptions contain details unsutable to sensitive minds.

Hi,

ahem, so, two weeks ago while messing around on a long board at work (i know i know) I was trying a kickflip and the board popped up vertically and I landed on the nose with my nutsack. The following day my nuts where completely black and there was a long black bruise leading to my ass. Again, sorry about the details here, but they're necessary. Anyways, that wasn't the worst of it. After two weeks of healing the bruises are gone, but a worse problem remains, an inability to get boners ( feel free to let out your laughter and thank god you're not me). The problem isn't my balls, but whatever tendon etc that got speared with the board.

Has this ever happened to anyone here? If so, what did you do? Did it heal after time? did you do some sort of stretches or excercise or go to a doctor? Any (tasteful) advice would be much appreciated.

[EricLogan]

Sounds like you may have severed something, and may never get boners ever again.

Go to a doctor's and get it checked.

I woulda been in the ER within 3 hours of the incident if I'd yet to get a boner.

[Edward Penishands]

GO TO A DOCTOR ASAP!

[skate_bored]

yikes, im scared for you. go get that checked.

[HoovUCDC]

dude. go to the doctor.

my best friend got credit carded with a razor tailed deck.  it cut his sac open pretty bad.  at the ER his nut fell out onto the bed and all the doctor said was "well, i guess we'll have to put that back in" all casual like.  but all on all, getting credit carded is not very posi.

[gravel pitch]

I don't think boners really work that way. Your dick gets hard because your body pumps blood into it, and there are one-way valves that keep the blood from flowing back out. There are no tendons involved... and if you'd severed a vein, you would have definitely known it, because you'd have a huge bruise from all the internal bleeding, not just a small line.

Also, what the FUCK are you doing asking about this sort of advice on SLAP message boards?

[neko]

GO TO A DOCTOR ASAP!

[ice nine]

ignored

[EricLogan]

If you're insured, get it checked. Unless you don't value hard-on's as much as every other man, of course.

[grimcity]

Dude, when your balzak went black you should have been sitting in an emergency room. Get that shit checked out, man. You don't want to run the risk of compounding the injury because of a lack of treatment.

[cool dude]

this is hilarious.  I am trying my best not to bust out in laughter at work.

[ahlee]

if need be..

[H8R part 4]

this is hilarious.  I am trying my best not to bust out in laughter at work.

 

[skate_bored]

hilarious indeed

haha perfect

[aleksander]

let's just say some of the boner works and some of it doesn't.

what the hell does that mean? you got a floppy tip or one side is jello-y or what? ahh you made me imagine dicks too much you asshole!

[Dr Newton]

I HAVE A MEDICAL PROBLEM. WHAT DO I DO INTERNET?