Author Topic: EPIC TEXT FAIL (Read 2118 times)

rawbertson. · « **on:** July 13, 2009, 03:27:33 PM »

ok so i was at work and i decided to text my "friend" who is really mad at me (we are enemies now) because "i told everyone he was doing coke"

the truth is, we were making fun of him because he lies so much. he said he did coke every day for 3 months and didnt pay for it once. come one, what kind of coke head gives away free coke? unless ur suckin his d, aint happenin,

the other thing you need to know is he told us this lie about how he met mark appleyard or how he talked to him on the phone in cuba or something really stupid. its a lie thats all you really need to know about that it was very obvious from the beginning it was a lie. anyway here she goes, epic text message fail

j0rdan · « **Reply #1 on:** July 13, 2009, 03:33:01 PM »

one time chet thomas was skating at a demo, and I pretended to squeeze his ass/hump him while he was signing autographs

Prison Wallet · « **Reply #2 on:** July 13, 2009, 03:35:50 PM »

Hold on, what about the texting part?

Bugs · « **Reply #3 on:** July 13, 2009, 03:36:22 PM »

I had this epic text fail on Saturday. Went out on Friday, met this petite 21 year old Puerto Rican with bleached blond hair and a tongue ring, got her number, she gave me a ride home and made out a little, it was a nice rebound after the last drama queen. So anyways I had invited her to this soccer match the next day and she was down. Thus I did not push to hard for the one night stand cuz date tomorrow.

Call her in the morning, no answer, then I text. She texted me back 2 long ass texts of how her gf had her keys, couldn't find her gf, had to drive hella deep to get the spare, and didn't go to sleep till 4am. Combine the lack of sleep and her bro's b-day party she had to say no to the 1 pm soccer match.

I thought oh well, so my friends later that night were like, text her. So I did, "wanna hang tonight"

she texts back

"who is this"

Cookie Monster · « **Reply #4 on:** July 13, 2009, 03:41:25 PM »

I'm sure everyones accidentally sent the wrong message to the wrong person, I do that all the time.

j0rdan · « **Reply #5 on:** July 13, 2009, 03:45:30 PM »

Quote from: Bugs on July 13, 2009, 03:36:22 PM

I had this epic text fail on Saturday. Went out on Friday, met this petite 21 year old Puerto Rican with bleached blond hair and a tongue ring, got her number, she gave me a ride home and made out a little, it was a nice rebound after the last drama queen. So anyways I had invited her to this soccer match the next day and she was down. Thus I did not push to hard for the one night stand cuz date tomorrow.

Call her in the morning, no answer, then I text. She texted me back 2 long ass texts of how her gf had her keys, couldn't find her gf, had to drive hella deep to get the spare, and didn't go to sleep till 4am. Combine the lack of sleep and her bro's b-day party she had to say no to the 1 pm soccer match.

I thought oh well, so my friends later that night were like, text her. So I did, "wanna hang tonight"

she texts back

"who is this"

that's such a fucking bummer man. what happened with her after that?

something simillar happened to me like a year or two ago. me and some friends were all coked out and were driving, and there was this girl who was walking on some dirt road, so we picked her up. blah blah blah, she got ditched and was sad, but was happy we picked her up. she gave me her number. I thought I was so cool getting her number, but then again I was pretty fucked up on coke. two days later, I texted her "hey whats up" she says "whos this?" fucking rad.

this one is funny too, but it's not a text. on msn I was talking to some girl and a friend at the same time, and he sent me these miley cyrus pics, and we started talking about her. I said "who cares if she's like 14, I'd still fuck her" except I sent it to the girl by accident. it was pretty rofl/awkward

SFblah · « **Reply #6 on:** July 13, 2009, 03:55:56 PM »

My friend was hooking up with this Jewish girl for a bit and one morning he woke up after sleeping with her and decided to text me saying, "I just killed that Jew ass like Anne Frank", as a joke. About 5 seconds later he realized he sent it to her phone and not mine. He jumped out of her bed, ran downstairs into the living room, and jumped over the couch as she was about to grab her vibrating phone. He ran in the kitchen and deleted it. He just says, "That wasn't meant for you", and left it at that.

Bugs · « **Reply #7 on:** July 13, 2009, 03:56:31 PM »

j0rdan, I texted her back, and she texted me back:

"haha sorry i cant tho its my lil brothers birthday"

So no biggie, if I don't hear from her, I'll try again on Friday. Gotta keep up the momentum with picking up chicks though, shit has been going pretty well this summer.

SFblah · « **Reply #8 on:** July 13, 2009, 03:59:36 PM »

Quote from: My penis is on my forehead on July 13, 2009, 03:46:07 PM

me:because you dont have any. that is just another lie. you will never have "real" friends because you are a compulsive liar and anyone can see that. there are so many awesome lies you have told us though so we will cherish those amazing, but untrue stories forever.

Man, there are some friends that have given us a few of these too. When they tell everyone a different version of a crazy lie it's almost too awesome to call them out.

skate_bored · « **Reply #9 on:** July 13, 2009, 05:05:19 PM »

what about when you wake up from a night of drinking(every night) and look at your outbox. that shit is pure entertainment and i will begin to post mine in here.

heckler · « **Reply #10 on:** July 13, 2009, 05:12:05 PM »

www.textsfromlastnight.com

jack burton · « **Reply #11 on:** July 13, 2009, 05:25:23 PM »

Quote from: skate_bored on July 13, 2009, 05:05:19 PM

what about when you wake up from a night of drinking(every night) and look at your outbox. that shit is pure entertainment and i will begin to post mine in here.

i am excited for these.

Lumpy Oatmeal · « **Reply #12 on:** July 13, 2009, 05:35:56 PM »

Quote from: frank gerwer's nose on July 13, 2009, 05:12:05 PM

www.textsfromlastnight.com

"(410): It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force. "

FROST YOUR TIPS · « **Reply #13 on:** July 13, 2009, 07:53:24 PM »

Quote from: SFblah on July 13, 2009, 03:55:56 PM

My friend was hooking up with this Jewish girl for a bit and one morning he woke up after sleeping with her and decided to text me saying, "I just killed that Jew ass like Anne Frank", as a joke. About 5 seconds later he realized he sent it to her phone and not mine. He jumped out of her bed, ran downstairs into the living room, and jumped over the couch as she was about to grab her vibrating phone. He ran in the kitchen and deleted it. He just says, "That wasn't meant for you", and left it at that.

hahah holy fuck

sven thorkel · « **Reply #14 on:** July 13, 2009, 08:43:34 PM »

come one though, bro could have sharpened up his wits a bit. anne frank wasn't doing any jewish killing. he could have said something like "yo i just mengeled that pussah"

MexicanSpaniard · « **Reply #15 on:** July 13, 2009, 09:01:45 PM »

Did you just rat someone for the same thing again or this your shitty reminiscing of ratting?

sven thorkel · « **Reply #16 on:** July 13, 2009, 09:17:37 PM »

ohh damn man, rawbs just brought out the heavy artillery for that one. loaded up that cannon with some homosexual synonyms and fired away

Bipsmound · « **Reply #17 on:** July 13, 2009, 09:22:41 PM »

The only cannon Rawb has is one of those t-shirt launchers to fire gully nightgowns at the windows of the old folks home.

SFblah · « **Reply #18 on:** July 13, 2009, 10:18:35 PM »

Quote from: sven thorkel on July 13, 2009, 08:43:34 PM

come one though, bro could have sharpened up his wits a bit. anne frank wasn't doing any jewish killing. he could have said something like "yo i just mengeled that pussah"

HAHAHA! Yea, that would have been a win

skate_bored · « **Reply #19 on:** July 13, 2009, 10:25:35 PM »

just found this. apparently i sent it to somebody while i was losing at poker.

"thats a heart. and i love love. so that is tight."

killing time · « **Reply #20 on:** July 13, 2009, 11:08:44 PM »

taken from texts from last night

"(402): I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over."

EXTRA SPICY · « **Reply #21 on:** July 14, 2009, 02:04:26 AM »

"your gf has been suckin my dick like a little 2 timing slut"

camel filters · « **Reply #22 on:** July 14, 2009, 07:17:51 AM »

i txted a good friend that ive been thinking about her as more than a friend lately. still havent gotten a response...

camel filters · « **Reply #23 on:** July 14, 2009, 08:40:51 AM »

no kidding o well i have a ton of shit about myself to worry over (school, career, skating, general direction in life) to set time aside for a chick. but she is awesome.

McCly · « **Reply #24 on:** July 14, 2009, 01:05:25 PM »

Quote from: camel filters on July 14, 2009, 08:40:51 AM

no kidding o well i have a ton of shit about myself to worry over (school, career, skating, general direction in life) to set time aside for a chick. but she is awesome.

fucking blew it, son.

Author Topic: EPIC TEXT FAIL (Read 2118 times)

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