Author Topic: Awkward Sexual Experiences  (Read 462858 times)

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Bobbito

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #90 on: February 25, 2010, 11:55:26 PM »
The second time I got beejed up also coincides with the first & only time I've ever sharted. I was hanging around Brigham Circle in Mission Hill one night with a bunch of my friends. Some wasted asian chick is yelling for her friend and we start talking to her. I couldn't tell she was drunk, she seemed pretty aware of everything & walking alright, and I thought she was pretty cute. She tags along with us for a half hour or so, and then everyone plans on running away from her because she was annoying the piss out of them; I still thought she was cute so I stuck around. My friends yelled back "Mack harder!" & I proceeded as such.

I ended up walking her back to her dorm in Northeastern, she signed me in and we sat on her bed listening to music. We end up making out and that's when I first realized how wasted she was--her vodka breath made my stomach uneasy. She takes off her top & she's got a good going on. About 5'2", B cup, soft skin, first asian--I was into it. Then she started giving me a HJ & I think she was under the impression that if she didn't keep her speed above 55MPH that my penis would explode. It hurt so much but I suffered through it. She wanted to bone, but this was when I was still a virgin and under the hallucination that I wanted to at least lose it to someone I loved--so I turned her down.

She then went down on me for about 30 seconds and it was a glorious spectacle. Little asian girl with a small mouth with plump lips and tiny hands--it was beautiful. But then she stopped and kept asking to bone. I convinced her finally that because she was way too drunk & I wasn't, it'd be a bad choice. I left about an hour later, and she wrote down her number & email. On the walk back I realize my ass is really chaffed. Unbearably chaffed. I check it out once I get back to my friend's, and I see a shit stain on my underwear. Then a flashback reel played back to me--I had chinese food that night, I remember letting off a wet fart before going to that girl's dorm, and I also remember her pulling down my pants while I laid on her white sheets. I laughed at my misfortune, but I wasn't planning on calling her anyway. Now sometimes I wonder if she stopped going down on me because it smelled rank or because she was fluffing me.

YOU SHOULDA DONE IT DUDE! ASIAN CHICKS ARE THE BEST AND CUTEST CHICKS EVER!

-Situation

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #91 on: February 26, 2010, 12:04:35 AM »
I know meng, I look back and sigh. How was salvy, are you a millionaire now?

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #92 on: February 26, 2010, 05:25:16 AM »
haha

Bobbito

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #93 on: February 26, 2010, 08:32:55 AM »
I know meng, I look back and sigh. How was salvy, are you a millionaire now?
Nah, never went but I might today. I got a story though....

When I was a senior, I brought my sleazy side out and tried to get any and all the pussy possible before graduating high school and one of these hookups ended up being with this chick I had just met in my gym class. That time was somewhat awkward because one of my friends was driving my car and my other friend was in the backseat passed out. Long story short, both friends leave and I start fingering the chick and whip it out being like "let me get some head" and her saying "No, I don't do that" and then finding out the following Monday in school that two dudes had just fucked her in the hours prior to me getting with her.

Part two happens this past November after not really talking to her for like 3 years. I'd usually drunk chat with her on facebook and say stupid shit just for kicks but one night I actually end up calling her. I bring her to some party and we're just kickin it so I'm like "come with me to my car, I wanna grab some beers". So she comes with and we start smooching and getting all touchy feely. We stayed at this party for a little longer and then she pretty much pulled me out of the party so I figure alright this bitch is down. No holds barred, I bring her straight to my house and into my bed and we start making out. I take her shirt off, start sucking titties, kissing all over. As I'm about to unzip her jeans, she takes my hands and brings them back up and is like "Listen I don't do this anymore"....I was like you don't do what? She says "this. I don't just randomly hook up like that anymore". Long story short, we didn't smush but she still spent the night cuddled up with me in my bed topless and with her jeans on....I was so furious and confused by what chick in their right mind would go home with a dude, get in bed, start smooching and then some, and then be like actually wait I forgot I stopped being a slut. She coulda easily not wasted my time and said I wanna go home or some shit. Never talk to her now and if I see her she gives me weird ass looks. Sluts......

Guile

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #94 on: February 26, 2010, 11:49:04 AM »
this morning i woke up with a chick in my bed, we made out and fooled around for about half an hour then she tells me shes 3 months into a promise not to have sex for a year. needless to say, i snapped one off on her stomach. now shes beside me and i havent said a word for about an hour.
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Bobbito

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #95 on: February 26, 2010, 01:47:09 PM »
^^^ Bitches get stitches man.
preach it man. I had blue balls for like 3 hours til I dropped her off and rushed home to rub one out. I wasn't even pissed really I was just so confused about what single chick in their right mind would chill with a dude, go home and let him suck her titties, and then when going for the g spot tells the guy she doesn't "do this" anymore.

Laban Fetus

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #96 on: February 26, 2010, 02:12:47 PM »
^^^ Bitches get stitches man.
heh yeah dude. chestbump

Mackattack

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #97 on: February 26, 2010, 02:28:24 PM »
One time i was hanging out with two friends just driving around and one of them calls this girl he fucks and we meet up with her. Shes already drunk somehow and we pick up some more beer and just park it and hang out. Somehow bukkake jumps into the conversation and we begin to joke about performing bukkake on this girl, much to her bewilderment. She has no fucking clue what bukkake is so we tell her that we cant explain it, we can only show her. We go out into this field and she takes her top off. She had the biggest most glorious boobs id ever seen in person and thats really as far as my friend that wasnt fucking her and i wanted to go, but she insists that we all pull out our cocks and triple team her in the middle of this soccer field or something. She pulls out my friends cock and comes to take out the rest of our peckers but we denied her and my friend is just standing there saying " Soo.... my dick is out guys... my dick is out. Nobody elses dick is out.... cool." And this girl goes into a vengeful rage so we duck out and wait for them while they do whatever it is they did. Kind of wonder if we should have just nutted up and done it to this day... Would have made for a better story at least.

raul

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #98 on: February 26, 2010, 03:05:16 PM »
" Soo.... my dick is out guys... my dick is out. Nobody elses dick is out.... cool."

Ahahahahahah I envisioned this so well. I have a friend who would've said the same exact thing in that circumstance.

ProjectBluebeam

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #99 on: February 26, 2010, 04:45:27 PM »
well i most definitely wouldnt be walking away from bukakke field fridays featuring "glorious boobs"

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #100 on: February 26, 2010, 05:48:06 PM »
Ahahah great story Raul!

what single chick in their right mind would chill with a dude, go home and let him suck her titties, and then when going for the g spot tells the guy she doesn't "do this" anymore.

The kind that's asking to get raped. BIM BOM! (Kidding).

(I think.)

Dude, Macklin, you fucking blew it figuratively when you and your buddies should have blown it literally.

jeremyrandall

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #101 on: February 26, 2010, 06:53:36 PM »
Post 999 guys :D

So many awkward moments in this story.  It's pretty long but pretty funny.  Read if you want.

I was in Byron Bay and this one Australian friend of mine invited me to come up to Surfer's Paradise with him for a couple days.  He was going to stay with some friends of his that he grew up with.  So we get up there...and three of his friends all live in the same apartment complex.  One upstairs with his girlfriend, the other two downstairs.  Just after we got there, and whole bunch of their friends showed up and basically the night turned into this kinda mini high school reunion for all these Australian dudes that all grew up together.  There was like 10 of them and I was the odd guy out.  Already kind of a socially awkward situation.

They were pretty rad guys though, and we all started getting drunk so it was alright.  One last dude shows up with this girl.  She was like the only girl there, and the way she was standing with the dude, I just assumed she was his girlfriend.  She's pretty good looking but I figure she's taken...no chance.

So we're all pretty drunk at this point...and we decide to go out.  It was a looooooong hilarious pretty rad night (Australians party fucking hard) so basically we went a bunch of places and caused a ruckus all night long.  The bars all closed at 4 am and we all start walking home.  At this point I've said no more than like 3 sentences to this girl.  But as we're walking back, she stays right beside me, letting the dude she came with get in front of us a bit.  Turns out she's his SISTER not girlfriend.  So better chances, but we're still hanging out with her older brother and all his friends.

We get back to the apartment, and everyone decides they're gonna go visit their neighbor a few blocks away and smoke some weed.  I don't really smoke weed so I'm like, "I'll just stay here."  She's like, "Yeah...I'm staying here too."  So everyone leaves but me and her.  The door was shut for less than 5 seconds and she has me on the floor making out with me.  She starts rubbing my dick and shit.  At this point, I'd only fucked 2 girls in my life and my mind was blown that this all happened with virtually no work on my part.  So I start reaching into her pants...when all the sudden we hear a different chick's voice coming from the bedroom. 

"WHO THE FUCK IS OUT THERE?  I CAN HEAR YOU!  I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING!  WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY APARTMENT??"

It's the that other dude's girlfriend (who turned out to be a huuuuge bitch and was not hanging out with us at all that night).  AWWWWWKWAAAARD!!  We get up as fast and quiet as we can and get the fuck out of there.  So we go downstairs to other friend's apartment. No one there.  There's an air mattress in the main room, and we got right down to business.  Except she was wearing this fucking corset thing with a million buttons.  I tried for like 3 minutes to take it off, and she's basically just laughing at me.  She finally takes off her own clothes...I throw on a condom...and boom...GETTING LAID!!  I was stoked.  A little too stoked actually.  This was my first time in so long and lets just say I put up a disappointing performance.  More awkwardness.

I tossed the condom in the garbage and just pulled on my pants when the door swings open and in piles 10 more dudes...including her older brother.  I CANNOT FIND THE DAMN CONDOM WRAPPER!!  Everyone is drunk though and passes out shortly, including me.

I wake up to a hand job...surrounded by a bunch of large Australian guys...one of whom is her older brother.  I'm stressin, but no one seems to notice.  Everyone wakes up and we're all just hanging out talking about the night before.  Then someone finds the missing condom wrapper.  I think I'm dead.  But everyone starts bugging the dude who lives there, thinking it must be a left over from some other time.  I'm safe.  Until my only friend there, the guy who invited me, is like "Hey...let me see that."  They pass him the wrapper.  He takes a look at it, smiles at me, and says, "Hmmmm...we don't have this brand of condoms in Australia."

I made it out alive.  In fact, all the dudes (minus her brother) were fucking stoked on me and a few of them became good friends.  But it was a VERY AWKWARD afternoon hanging out with her AND her brother all day long.

mcpeepants

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #102 on: February 26, 2010, 07:02:07 PM »
I was 16, and my current girlfriend and I told her dad we were gonna look for some old movies in her basement. He was watching tv in the room literally 5 steps/stairs up from the basement (it was a townhouse). We got down there and just started fucking like horny teenagers. I guess we were bumping into stuff and making noise and we heard her dad get up and yell "what's all that racket!?" Then he starts running towards the stairs and we both freak. She pulls up her pajama pants, and I pull my shorts up real quick, squat down and pretend to be looking through some boxes right when he gets down to the basement. He had to have known something was up, because we were both red in the face and kinda sweaty. Needless to say, after he went back upstairs we finished like the careless, horny teenagers that we were.
you some closet dick-in-da-booty ass nigga.


DevinSB

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #103 on: February 26, 2010, 09:19:16 PM »
Expand Quote
I know meng, I look back and sigh. How was salvy, are you a millionaire now?
[close]
Nah, never went but I might today. I got a story though....

When I was a senior, I brought my sleazy side out and tried to get any and all the pussy possible before graduating high school and one of these hookups ended up being with this chick I had just met in my gym class. That time was somewhat awkward because one of my friends was driving my car and my other friend was in the backseat passed out. Long story short, both friends leave and I start fingering the chick and whip it out being like "let me get some head" and her saying "No, I don't do that" and then finding out the following Monday in school that two dudes had just fucked her in the hours prior to me getting with her.

Part two happens this past November after not really talking to her for like 3 years. I'd usually drunk chat with her on facebook and say stupid shit just for kicks but one night I actually end up calling her. I bring her to some party and we're just kickin it so I'm like "come with me to my car, I wanna grab some beers". So she comes with and we start smooching and getting all touchy feely. We stayed at this party for a little longer and then she pretty much pulled me out of the party so I figure alright this bitch is down. No holds barred, I bring her straight to my house and into my bed and we start making out. I take her shirt off, start sucking titties, kissing all over. As I'm about to unzip her jeans, she takes my hands and brings them back up and is like "Listen I don't do this anymore"....I was like you don't do what? She says "this. I don't just randomly hook up like that anymore". Long story short, we didn't smush but she still spent the night cuddled up with me in my bed topless and with her jeans on....I was so furious and confused by what chick in their right mind would go home with a dude, get in bed, start smooching and then some, and then be like actually wait I forgot I stopped being a slut. She coulda easily not wasted my time and said I wanna go home or some shit. Never talk to her now and if I see her she gives me weird ass looks. Sluts......
in my experience, girls do that kinda shit when they want the guy to think they're a nice girl so that you will date them.

well i most definitely wouldnt be walking away from bukakke field fridays featuring "glorious boobs"
seriously man what the fuck were you thinking?!

jack burton

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #104 on: February 26, 2010, 11:05:20 PM »
one time my mom walked in on me and my ex boning while under the covers. we basically just had our pants pulled down a little but talking to my mom with my dick inside a girl is pretty fuckin awkward.


Bobbito

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #105 on: February 26, 2010, 11:59:27 PM »
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Expand Quote
I know meng, I look back and sigh. How was salvy, are you a millionaire now?
[close]
Nah, never went but I might today. I got a story though....

When I was a senior, I brought my sleazy side out and tried to get any and all the pussy possible before graduating high school and one of these hookups ended up being with this chick I had just met in my gym class. That time was somewhat awkward because one of my friends was driving my car and my other friend was in the backseat passed out. Long story short, both friends leave and I start fingering the chick and whip it out being like "let me get some head" and her saying "No, I don't do that" and then finding out the following Monday in school that two dudes had just fucked her in the hours prior to me getting with her.

Part two happens this past November after not really talking to her for like 3 years. I'd usually drunk chat with her on facebook and say stupid shit just for kicks but one night I actually end up calling her. I bring her to some party and we're just kickin it so I'm like "come with me to my car, I wanna grab some beers". So she comes with and we start smooching and getting all touchy feely. We stayed at this party for a little longer and then she pretty much pulled me out of the party so I figure alright this bitch is down. No holds barred, I bring her straight to my house and into my bed and we start making out. I take her shirt off, start sucking titties, kissing all over. As I'm about to unzip her jeans, she takes my hands and brings them back up and is like "Listen I don't do this anymore"....I was like you don't do what? She says "this. I don't just randomly hook up like that anymore". Long story short, we didn't smush but she still spent the night cuddled up with me in my bed topless and with her jeans on....I was so furious and confused by what chick in their right mind would go home with a dude, get in bed, start smooching and then some, and then be like actually wait I forgot I stopped being a slut. She coulda easily not wasted my time and said I wanna go home or some shit. Never talk to her now and if I see her she gives me weird ass looks. Sluts......
[close]
in my experience, girls do that kinda shit when they want the guy to think they're a nice girl so that you will date them.
See that's what I thought too and I hung with her later on the following week and was like listen sorry about the other night if that was awkward I'd like to take you out and she was down. Then I call her the following weekend and she completely wiffs and even after that if I see her she acts all weird. The female is a wonder.

Mackattack

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #106 on: February 27, 2010, 08:41:26 AM »
Ahahah great story Raul!

Expand Quote
what single chick in their right mind would chill with a dude, go home and let him suck her titties, and then when going for the g spot tells the guy she doesn't "do this" anymore.
[close]

The kind that's asking to get raped. BIM BOM! (Kidding).

(I think.)

Dude, Macklin, you fucking blew it figuratively when you and your buddies should have blown it literally.

Just wasn't in that gangbang mood, guys. To even double team (mind you this would have been a triple team, 3 poles, 3 holes) a girl she would have to be insanely attractive and this girl was kind of busted aside from the breasteses. Also i was only 6 beers deep and holding back an immense dump. All excuses aside, it would have made for a great story to inappropriately tell my grandchildren one day.

krewkruxklan

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #107 on: February 27, 2010, 05:58:03 PM »
Antwuan Dixon.

HAHAHA

i read waterloo shantell and awkward sexual experiences and i was not disapointed.

cats is nice but I aint seen god since hova spit that navy blue to me
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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #108 on: February 27, 2010, 08:33:23 PM »
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
No holds barred, til labias say "free us"
then its straight to your kids' school, wine coolers in the Prius

Beer Keg Peg Leg

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #109 on: February 27, 2010, 10:24:52 PM »
BOOM BABY

lamfordie

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #110 on: February 27, 2010, 10:36:08 PM »
One time in junior high, i was sitting outside by the parking lot with this one chick, and she wanted to give me a hand job but we couldnt do it cuz her parents were coming.

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #111 on: February 28, 2010, 03:04:47 PM »
back when i was doing a lot of dating i actually managed to get a girl to come home with me from a bar one-night-stand style.  that's not to say it's never happened, but in my experience not a lot of girls want to go to a stranger's house and have sex the first time they meet them. 

in any case, things were going well and we get to my place and commence doing the deed.  then mid way through she starts crying

that was awkward

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SFblah

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #112 on: February 28, 2010, 03:20:20 PM »
back when i was doing a lot of dating i actually managed to get a girl to come home with me from a bar one-night-stand style.  that's not to say it's never happened, but in my experience not a lot of girls want to go to a stranger's house and have sex the first time they meet them. 

in any case, things were going well and we get to my place and commence doing the deed.  then mid way through she starts crying

that was awkward



You gotta watch that shit. 

Went out with some friends one night and a girl I know showed up after breaking up with her boyfriend and she was on a mission to get wasted.  So her and one of my friends are both very drunk and all touchy.  Everyone goes back to his place for an after party and she's all over his drunk ass and passes up a ride home to stay there.  Next day they wake up and met us for breakfast, after obviously bumpin' uglies all night, and neither of them seemed uncomfortable.

The friend comes home about 2 weeks later to his apt ransacked.......by the police.  She turned around and pressed rape charges on him so they confiscated his computer, photos, etc.  He spent $12k in lawyer fees to finally have her not pursue it after he passed multiple lie detector tests.  The investigator said she never returned their calls.  She put him through hell because she didn't wanna have her boyfriend find out she hooked up with someone after they got in a fight.

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #113 on: February 28, 2010, 03:30:27 PM »
Expand Quote
back when i was doing a lot of dating i actually managed to get a girl to come home with me from a bar one-night-stand style.  that's not to say it's never happened, but in my experience not a lot of girls want to go to a stranger's house and have sex the first time they meet them. 

in any case, things were going well and we get to my place and commence doing the deed.  then mid way through she starts crying

that was awkward


[close]


You gotta watch that shit. 

Went out with some friends one night and a girl I know showed up after breaking up with her boyfriend and she was on a mission to get wasted.  So her and one of my friends are both very drunk and all touchy.  Everyone goes back to his place for an after party and she's all over his drunk ass and passes up a ride home to stay there.  Next day they wake up and met us for breakfast, after obviously bumpin' uglies all night, and neither of them seemed uncomfortable.

The friend comes home about 2 weeks later to his apt ransacked.......by the police.  She turned around and pressed rape charges on him so they confiscated his computer, photos, etc.  He spent $12k in lawyer fees to finally have her not pursue it after he passed multiple lie detector tests.  The investigator said she never returned their calls.  She put him through hell because she didn't wanna have her boyfriend find out she hooked up with someone after they got in a fight.
dude fuck that is so terrible
You either die a hero or live long enough to watch yourself become the Berra.

oyolar

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #114 on: February 28, 2010, 04:21:07 PM »
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Expand Quote
back when i was doing a lot of dating i actually managed to get a girl to come home with me from a bar one-night-stand style.  that's not to say it's never happened, but in my experience not a lot of girls want to go to a stranger's house and have sex the first time they meet them. 

in any case, things were going well and we get to my place and commence doing the deed.  then mid way through she starts crying

that was awkward


[close]


You gotta watch that shit. 

Went out with some friends one night and a girl I know showed up after breaking up with her boyfriend and she was on a mission to get wasted.  So her and one of my friends are both very drunk and all touchy.  Everyone goes back to his place for an after party and she's all over his drunk ass and passes up a ride home to stay there.  Next day they wake up and met us for breakfast, after obviously bumpin' uglies all night, and neither of them seemed uncomfortable.

The friend comes home about 2 weeks later to his apt ransacked.......by the police.  She turned around and pressed rape charges on him so they confiscated his computer, photos, etc.  He spent $12k in lawyer fees to finally have her not pursue it after he passed multiple lie detector tests.  The investigator said she never returned their calls.  She put him through hell because she didn't wanna have her boyfriend find out she hooked up with someone after they got in a fight.
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dude fuck that is so terrible

I've never had a one night stand, but that's probably the main reason I'm not sure whether or not I'd be down for one.

Bobbito

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #115 on: February 28, 2010, 05:00:53 PM »
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back when i was doing a lot of dating i actually managed to get a girl to come home with me from a bar one-night-stand style.  that's not to say it's never happened, but in my experience not a lot of girls want to go to a stranger's house and have sex the first time they meet them. 

in any case, things were going well and we get to my place and commence doing the deed.  then mid way through she starts crying

that was awkward


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You gotta watch that shit. 

Went out with some friends one night and a girl I know showed up after breaking up with her boyfriend and she was on a mission to get wasted.  So her and one of my friends are both very drunk and all touchy.  Everyone goes back to his place for an after party and she's all over his drunk ass and passes up a ride home to stay there.  Next day they wake up and met us for breakfast, after obviously bumpin' uglies all night, and neither of them seemed uncomfortable.

The friend comes home about 2 weeks later to his apt ransacked.......by the police.  She turned around and pressed rape charges on him so they confiscated his computer, photos, etc.  He spent $12k in lawyer fees to finally have her not pursue it after he passed multiple lie detector tests.  The investigator said she never returned their calls.  She put him through hell because she didn't wanna have her boyfriend find out she hooked up with someone after they got in a fight.
exactly why it's better to fuck a chick at her house and just bounce before anything further happens. Also, if you live at your parents house which is the situation I'm in, it just sucks because you have to be quiet and shit and it's not as fun.

raul

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #116 on: March 01, 2010, 02:28:53 PM »
Me and this girl had been hooking up for about a week, I was stoked because my roommate and I dubbed her as the cutest chick in the hall, and we finally have a night to ourselves. Before I get into the main story: this girl was a biter. After the first night we hooked up, I had blood blisters on my lip, she had sucked on my tongue so hard that the part connected to my bottom jaw was sore--I had to walk around slack-jawed all day. And she gave me about 3 hickeys, I fucking hate hickeys. This isn't middle school. I told her not to do that again, and then I ended up with two more. Fuck.

So I bought some shitty wine one night, we ate in her room and chatted. I hadn't had too much & my stomach wasn't up for it that night, but she weighs 90 pounds so 2 glasses in, she's trainwrecked. We start making out, clothes come off, and it's obvious we're about to bone. We hadn't done it by that point so I was all excited. We fluff each other up--great head by the way. Another small girl with tiny hands and great lips, going up and down putting in some good work. She was also the one who took my balls in her mouth and pulled on them, which I found out I'm hesitant about--sorry Wilson, I can't man up to your level.

Either way, she lays back, I get the condom on and sectachrome's dead fish scenario happens--This girl looked like she got a large, sudden dose of tranquilizer in her. Her head was tilted to the side, her arms were slack, her voice went all monotone and & slurred, "Iwantyoutofuckme." She really looked dead. I've never gone limp so fast in my life. It was a devastation. I tried to banish it from my mind & just go for it, but she had a jungle growing down there and by the time I found the friendly little rabbit hole I was beyond help. She certainly didn't look like the cutest chick in the hall anymore. I told her I was tired and I left. The next day I told her we should quit while we're ahead because we're going to see each other a lot & both don't want relationships, so let's not let it get weird. Luckily haven't felt tempted to go back.

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #117 on: March 01, 2010, 02:37:31 PM »
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back when i was doing a lot of dating i actually managed to get a girl to come home with me from a bar one-night-stand style.  that's not to say it's never happened, but in my experience not a lot of girls want to go to a stranger's house and have sex the first time they meet them. 

in any case, things were going well and we get to my place and commence doing the deed.  then mid way through she starts crying

that was awkward


[close]

You gotta watch that shit. 

Went out with some friends one night and a girl I know showed up after breaking up with her boyfriend and she was on a mission to get wasted.  So her and one of my friends are both very drunk and all touchy.  Everyone goes back to his place for an after party and she's all over his drunk ass and passes up a ride home to stay there.  Next day they wake up and met us for breakfast, after obviously bumpin' uglies all night, and neither of them seemed uncomfortable.

The friend comes home about 2 weeks later to his apt ransacked.......by the police.  She turned around and pressed rape charges on him so they confiscated his computer, photos, etc.  He spent $12k in lawyer fees to finally have her not pursue it after he passed multiple lie detector tests.  The investigator said she never returned their calls.  She put him through hell because she didn't wanna have her boyfriend find out she hooked up with someone after they got in a fight.

that is fucking awful
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sage

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #118 on: March 01, 2010, 03:09:08 PM »
Expand Quote
back when i was doing a lot of dating i actually managed to get a girl to come home with me from a bar one-night-stand style.  that's not to say it's never happened, but in my experience not a lot of girls want to go to a stranger's house and have sex the first time they meet them. 

in any case, things were going well and we get to my place and commence doing the deed.  then mid way through she starts crying

that was awkward


[close]

You gotta watch that shit. 

Went out with some friends one night and a girl I know showed up after breaking up with her boyfriend and she was on a mission to get wasted.  So her and one of my friends are both very drunk and all touchy.  Everyone goes back to his place for an after party and she's all over his drunk ass and passes up a ride home to stay there.  Next day they wake up and met us for breakfast, after obviously bumpin' uglies all night, and neither of them seemed uncomfortable.

The friend comes home about 2 weeks later to his apt ransacked.......by the police.  She turned around and pressed rape charges on him so they confiscated his computer, photos, etc.  He spent $12k in lawyer fees to finally have her not pursue it after he passed multiple lie detector tests.  The investigator said she never returned their calls.  She put him through hell because she didn't wanna have her boyfriend find out she hooked up with someone after they got in a fight.

Something similar happened to someone in my family. This bitch claimed she was raped, then after my family member has to go through the bullshit of being arrested and charged and having his name in the papers, she doesn't even show up to trial and the case is dismissed. It's such bullshit that girls and throw out the rape card whenever they want and nothing happens, there's gotta be a law about pressing false charges.

jrock

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Re: Awkward Sexual Experiences
« Reply #119 on: March 01, 2010, 05:33:02 PM »
i was fucking this girl doggystyle on a rickety old futon.  it was bouncing all over the place, and we started to get a little out of rhythm.  somehow my dick slipped out of her pussy and went all the way up her ass without me realizing it.  she let out this death yodel and ran and locked herself in the bathroom for hours.  she was freaking out because the sudden shock caused her asshole to stay dialated open.  anyway, this chick just about fucking killed me.  she thought i did it on purpose, and it took months to finally convince her otherwise.  i did think it was pretty funny though.