Awkward Sexual Experiences

[everypennyfedcar]

I think you both molested her brother.

[Schteven]

Yesterday I had a headache....

[Bobbito]

I met this chick in the beginning of the summer who kind of came off as a bitch plus I found out she had a boyfriend so I paid her no mind. We'd always see each other at bars but would never really do more than exchange a few words so I figured it stayed being that she was taken and a shy chick/stuck up bitch. For the past 3 weeks though we've been fucking almost every night into the wee hours to the point where I'm always feeling like a zombie.

Now, this chick's freaky Peruvian punk side really comes out when she's fucking so one morning, trying to take advantage of that freaky side of hers, I told her I wanted to do some dirty shit to her like nut on her ass. So I'm fucking her from behind, slip the rubber off, and start nutting on her ass. Being as that I'm basically blind without my glasses, I aim a little too low and get it all over her asshole (I think) and on her pussy. It actually got funny for a sec because it shot so hard that my cum bounced off her ass and onto my seats. She starts to freak out a little telling me how I'm an idiot and that she's not on the pill (like I'd really get her pregnant by nutting ON her pussy) and so on. I kinda thought it was funny at first but then she looked really pissed so I got a little shook about the situation. I had to give her a sock to wipe down and was getting a bit nervous and paranoid. It's all good now though, been getting my nut with her ever since.

[Schteven]

Is it that freaky to cum over a chick? I usually do it with mah girl, cause I've got a hard time bustin with a condom, it just doesn't feel as good by far as rawdoggin it. I should take a std test or whatever, but here in Ukraine they still have the old school way of testing (meaning; they stick a stick in your dick). I'm totally against sticking things into my dick, so I won't have it.

Actually something like that happened to me a little while ago, I had just come over her back, and thought it'd be nice to give her some extra finger action.....when I realized I still had goo-y stuff on my hands....whoops. But she just had her period so I suppose everythings cool.

[starvingrobot]

I think you both molested her brother.

hahahahahaha

[Bobbito]

Is it that freaky to cum over a chick? I usually do it with mah girl, cause I've got a hard time bustin with a condom, it just doesn't feel as good by far as rawdoggin it. I should take a std test or whatever, but here in Ukraine they still have the old school way of testing (meaning; they stick a stick in your dick). I'm totally against sticking things into my dick, so I won't have it.

Actually something like that happened to me a little while ago, I had just come over her back, and thought it'd be nice to give her some extra finger action.....when I realized I still had goo-y stuff on my hands....whoops. But she just had her period so I suppose everythings cool.

It's not that freaky I guess but I had only been fucking her for a few days and we were parked in a kind of public parking lot and I was fucking her hard from behind pushing her into my seat and door so the nutting everywhere was like an ender ender.

[Omamori]

This was last summer. I always got off late from work. My girlfriend calls around 11 right before I was about to go home. I pull into an empty parking lot and we could talk. She just got out of the shower and told me she was horny. Her mom and sister were home so it wasn’t happening that night. She wanted anal sex which is something I have been fantasizing about since the 7th grade looking at the asses in Italian magazine stands. For a hormones changing kid moving to Italy was the best thing that could happen to me at that time. Anyways I tell her I’ll pick her up so we can buy condoms. This was our first time buying condoms even though we fucked a lot. Early next morning, so fuckin excited, we head off to Wal-Mart and I just grab a random box of Trojan condoms. And it just happened to be I had one of those customers that don’t know how to pay or forgot some shit. So this delayed things. Finally we arrive at her house, no mom or sister there so we had the place to ourselves. I open the box of condoms and find out they are some weird shaped shit. I put it on and I try to stick it in her. I have a hard time getting my head into her pussy so her tight asshole from no anal sex and guinea pig size turds didn’t help. But luckily Trojan supplied me with some lube with the condom. Then the lube goes away, she still wants it and goes to her kitchen and brings back fuckin cooking oil. In my head I was like WTF, then again she shits from there so it has seen worse. Anal sex wasn’t all it was hyped to be, so I just threw the condom on the floor and we just normally.

[LesbianPUNCH]

I was on a vacation with the same girl from above, you know, the brother molesting bitch.  We went with her mother to the worst place in the United States, Dodge City, Kansas, for her mum's 20 year highschool Anniversary.  Anyways, we stay at this bed and breakfast, and while her mom ( and the entire fucking town) is at this rodeo, we decide to fuck in her mom's huge ass bed.  I'm hitting it from the backside when I slip out of vag and into foreign territory (asshole.)  She made a noise of extreme discomfort, but then pulled me in closer.  We tried for a few seconds longer before she decided she didn't like it.

So I pull out, and there is shit in my pubes, on my dick, and I can smell it...It was pretty awful, but I didn't want to make shit awkward, so I wrapped the covers around my cock and cleaned the goods before going back into the comfort zone (vagina.)  I tried to continue, but I went soft when I couldn't shake the smell.  She aksed what was wrong, and I lightheartedly point at a tiny particle of poop in my pubes.  She started balling, ran out of the room, and hid in the bathroom for over an hour, balling. 

After some coaxing, she came out of the bathroom and into my arms.  I held her for an hour... we laughed, we cried, talked about the future.  And then her mom came home from the rodeo, kicked us out of her room, and she slept with shit covered blankets. 

[Omamori]

I was on a vacation with the same girl from above, you know, the brother molesting bitch.?  We went with her mother to the worst place in the United States, Dodge City, Kansas, for her mum's 20 year highschool Anniversary.?  Anyways, we stay at this bed and breakfast, and while her mom ( and the entire fucking town) is at this rodeo, we decide to fuck in her mom's huge ass bed.?  I'm hitting it from the backside when I slip out of vag and into foreign territory (asshole.)?  She made a noise of extreme discomfort, but then pulled me in closer.?  We tried for a few seconds longer before she decided she didn't like it.

So I pull out, and there is shit in my pubes, on my dick, and I can smell it...It was pretty awful, but I didn't want to make shit awkward, so I wrapped the covers around my cock and cleaned the goods before going back into the comfort zone (vagina.)?  I tried to continue, but I went soft when I couldn't shake the smell.?  She aksed what was wrong, and I lightheartedly point at a tiny particle of poop in my pubes.?  She started balling, ran out of the room, and hid in the bathroom for over an hour, balling.? 

After some coaxing, she came out of the bathroom and into my arms.?  I held her for an hour... we laughed, we cried, talked about the future.?  And then her mom came home from the rodeo, kicked us out of her room, and she slept with shit covered blankets.? 

I don't think it was a good idea to fuck her after you had shit on your dick.

[jimi420]

Last weekend my parents left town so I had my girl over so we could get freaky. well she gets drunk and we start to have sex when she just bursts out in tears. i kinda start to slow down to see what's wrong but she says not to stop and she starts to talk about her dead grandma. i mean she was red faced, snot nosed, weird cry mouth, and everything. I kinda felt like i was raping her for a minute. I try to tell her that we can just do it later but she insists that i finish, so i have to finish (which took me another 30 minutes) with her just crying and not putting any effort into it.

[LesbianPUNCH]

Expand Quote

I was on a vacation with the same girl from above, you know, the brother molesting bitch.?  We went with her mother to the worst place in the United States, Dodge City, Kansas, for her mum's 20 year highschool Anniversary.?  Anyways, we stay at this bed and breakfast, and while her mom ( and the entire fucking town) is at this rodeo, we decide to fuck in her mom's huge ass bed.?  I'm hitting it from the backside when I slip out of vag and into foreign territory (asshole.)?  She made a noise of extreme discomfort, but then pulled me in closer.?  We tried for a few seconds longer before she decided she didn't like it.

So I pull out, and there is shit in my pubes, on my dick, and I can smell it...It was pretty awful, but I didn't want to make shit awkward, so I wrapped the covers around my cock and cleaned the goods before going back into the comfort zone (vagina.)?  I tried to continue, but I went soft when I couldn't shake the smell.?  She aksed what was wrong, and I lightheartedly point at a tiny particle of poop in my pubes.?  She started balling, ran out of the room, and hid in the bathroom for over an hour, balling.? 

After some coaxing, she came out of the bathroom and into my arms.?  I held her for an hour... we laughed, we cried, talked about the future.?  And then her mom came home from the rodeo, kicked us out of her room, and she slept with shit covered blankets.? 

[close]

I don't think it was a good idea to fuck her after you had shit on your dick.

I know it wasn't a good idea.  This was years ago.  I was fucking stupid.  What are all of your additional question marks about?

[saucy ragu]

I met this chick in the beginning of the summer who kind of came off as a bitch plus I found out she had a boyfriend so I paid her no mind. We'd always see each other at bars but would never really do more than exchange a few words so I figured it stayed being that she was taken and a shy chick/stuck up bitch. For the past 3 weeks though we've been fucking almost every night into the wee hours to the point where I'm always feeling like a zombie.

Now, this chick's freaky Peruvian punk side really comes out when she's fucking so one morning, trying to take advantage of that freaky side of hers, I told her I wanted to do some dirty shit to her like nut on her ass. So I'm fucking her from behind, slip the rubber off, and start nutting on her ass. Being as that I'm basically blind without my glasses, I aim a little too low and get it all over her asshole (I think) and on her pussy. It actually got funny for a sec because it shot so hard that my cum bounced off her ass and onto my seats. She starts to freak out a little telling me how I'm an idiot and that she's not on the pill (like I'd really get her pregnant by nutting ON her pussy) and so on. I kinda thought it was funny at first but then she looked really pissed so I got a little shook about the situation. I had to give her a sock to wipe down and was getting a bit nervous and paranoid. It's all good now though, been getting my nut with her ever since.

Russian Vov, do I have a story for you... See you tomorrow babe.

[Weegee]

This girl I know down the street came to my house because she was bored. I was the only one at my house (thank god). We were talking about stuff, somehow got horny and she decided to give me a hand job. We were about a minute into it then I look out the window and they were 3 kids about 12 years old looking through the window. Adding insult to injury THEY WERE MY LITTLE BROTHERS FRIENDS. I closed the blinds and we went off into another room. I took me about 2 minutes to forget the whole thing and get my hard back on. I'm 100% positive they told my little bro.

Edit - This was a week ago.

[ChileOrDie]

Ive been fucking this girl for a couple of months and when were doing it. sometimes i get a lil crazy and start thinking of shocking her idk why it always goes through my mind. 

[Omamori]

Ive been fucking this girl for a couple of months and when were doing it. sometimes i get a lil crazy and start thinking of shocking her idk why it always goes through my mind.? 

Maybe you're into some weird shit. I worked with a girl who's ex-boyfriend was into getting his nipples shocked.

[saucy ragu]

Expand Quote

Ive been fucking this girl for a couple of months and when were doing it. sometimes i get a lil crazy and start thinking of shocking her idk why it always goes through my mind.? 

[close]

Maybe you're into some weird shit. I worked with a girl who's ex-boyfriend was into getting his nipples shocked.

I think you two are talking about different things. In which case, Chile, just do it. If she doesn't like it, find a girl who does.

[spool of cord]

Expand Quote

Is it that freaky to cum over a chick? I usually do it with mah girl, cause I've got a hard time bustin with a condom, it just doesn't feel as good by far as rawdoggin it. I should take a std test or whatever, but here in Ukraine they still have the old school way of testing (meaning; they stick a stick in your dick). I'm totally against sticking things into my dick, so I won't have it.

Actually something like that happened to me a little while ago, I had just come over her back, and thought it'd be nice to give her some extra finger action.....when I realized I still had goo-y stuff on my hands....whoops. But she just had her period so I suppose everythings cool.

[close]

It's not that freaky I guess but I had only been fucking her for a few days and we were parked in a kind of public parking lot and I was fucking her hard from behind pushing her into my seat and door so the nutting everywhere was like an ender ender.

hahahaha!

[Matze]

on sunday, my girl and I watched a sasha grey porn, where they did the same stuff that we usually do ... slapping her fce, buttfucking in different positions, fucking her in the mouth like it's her pussy and so on. we came to the point, that we can even do it better, so I started to put her finger in the butt and we had some awesome sex in the shower afterwards ... a couple of orgasms later we watched the shot by kern episode with sasha grey and discussed if she had a bleached pussy. either way there is something totally wrong with us/her or I'm lucky.

[nice weather]

Maybe its the countrymenship, but whenever I read about Matzes sexual exploits I picture a real sweaty dude with a red head yelling nasty german words for genitalia and it's kind of a turn off. Like when you just found a decent looking porn in hd and start to work your way through to lotions number 2 and 3 and all of a sudden, minute 31 or so, a new dude enters who's all red and sweaty and the rest of the porn is close ups of his balls and asshole and you can't rewind the video and your internet just disconnected and you know it's gonna take an our for it to be running again.

[ChileOrDie]

Expand Quote

I met this chick in the beginning of the summer who kind of came off as a bitch plus I found out she had a boyfriend so I paid her no mind. We'd always see each other at bars but would never really do more than exchange a few words so I figured it stayed being that she was taken and a shy chick/stuck up bitch. For the past 3 weeks though we've been fucking almost every night into the wee hours to the point where I'm always feeling like a zombie.

Now, this chick's freaky Peruvian punk side really comes out when she's fucking so one morning, trying to take advantage of that freaky side of hers, I told her I wanted to do some dirty shit to her like nut on her ass. So I'm fucking her from behind, slip the rubber off, and start nutting on her ass. Being as that I'm basically blind without my glasses, I aim a little too low and get it all over her asshole (I think) and on her pussy. It actually got funny for a sec because it shot so hard that my cum bounced off her ass and onto my seats. She starts to freak out a little telling me how I'm an idiot and that she's not on the pill (like I'd really get her pregnant by nutting ON her pussy) and so on. I kinda thought it was funny at first but then she looked really pissed so I got a little shook about the situation. I had to give her a sock to wipe down and was getting a bit nervous and paranoid. It's all good now though, been getting my nut with her ever since.

[close]

Russian Vov, do I have a story for you... See you tomorrow babe.

Thank you saaaucy Ragu next time i will go with my instincts , i dont know i feel like i should do it to satesfy that fantasy.

[Bobbito]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Ive been fucking this girl for a couple of months and when were doing it. sometimes i get a lil crazy and start thinking of shocking her idk why it always goes through my mind.? 

[close]

Maybe you're into some weird shit. I worked with a girl who's ex-boyfriend was into getting his nipples shocked.

[close]

I think you two are talking about different things. In which case, Chile, just do it. If she doesn't like it, find a girl who does.

I did that one time.....right before I did it, I straight up took a deep breath and asked her to confirm that she hadn't shit at any recent time prior. Also, one time, this same chick began her period as we were switching positions (her going on top) so that's when she decided she wanted anal. Luckily, no poop but it just felt weird so I let her knob me off til I nutted.

[Omamori]

I was fuckin my girlfriend and she didn't turn the radio off. She like country music (which consist of drinking, break ups, and Jesus). Then this song about Jesus is my savior and God is my life came on. She didn't notice but I did. I felt like I was being watched...I had to turn it off.

[bentmode]

thats not so bad.

ceeymar got his fist hand job at 15, then dudes congratulated him. which do you think is more awkward?

[Chiguy]

A friend told me I could come over to his room and buy some weed, but I guess he forgot to mention the fact that his girl was in there.

Went over to his room in the dorm and knock... No answer... Knock again... No answer

Then the door slowly creeps open, but I see nobody standing in his room. I look behind the door and there's his girlfriend butt ass naked. I promptly did a 180 while she screamed "OH MY GOD" at the top of her lungs. Then my friend asks me did I like his girlfriend's rack.

[Skwisgaar Skwigelf]

Maybe its the countrymenship, but whenever I read about Matzes sexual exploits I picture a real sweaty dude with a red head yelling nasty german words for genitalia and it's kind of a turn off. Like when you just found a decent looking porn in hd and start to work your way through to lotions number 2 and 3 and all of a sudden, minute 31 or so, a new dude enters who's all red and sweaty and the rest of the porn is close ups of his balls and asshole and you can't rewind the video and your internet just disconnected and you know it's gonna take an our for it to be running again.

This actually happened to you, didn't it... hahaha

[Smell Good]

I'm laughing at the "+1 Hidden" guy lurking this thread.

[Matze]

Expand Quote

Maybe its the countrymenship, but whenever I read about Matzes sexual exploits I picture a real sweaty dude with a red head yelling nasty german words for genitalia and it's kind of a turn off. Like when you just found a decent looking porn in hd and start to work your way through to lotions number 2 and 3 and all of a sudden, minute 31 or so, a new dude enters who's all red and sweaty and the rest of the porn is close ups of his balls and asshole and you can't rewind the video and your internet just disconnected and you know it's gonna take an our for it to be running again.

[close]

This actually happened to you, didn't it... hahaha

you fucking irish!

[Schteven]

This one's not as bad as a lot that have been posted, but still....

So I'm helping my gf watch the house of her grandma, (how many dudes hope it'll be a granny fuck story?) cause he grandma is out of town for a couple of days (sorry bros). Apearrently the neighbourhood is kinda sketchy, neighbours might steal shiot and whatever.

In the evening we're starting some nice touchy/feely/getting hot foreplay. At a certain moment my girl starts to get down on me, sucking my dick. I love it when she takes initiative. But after a few minutes she gets a phone call. Her grandma. She has to awnser, cause else grandma will get worried. So after a few things said (i don't know what, they speak russian) my girl goes into sucking my dick and talking on the phone, like making the "hmhm uhu"  sound to grandma. It was kinda akward, but at the same time pretty fucking awesome.

[saucy ragu]

All of my experiences lately have been more casual and straightforward than awkward lately, so this is the closest I got. Going at it doggy style last night, and just as the men abandon ship I slip out. My mind's completely focused on enjoying their rush to freedom, so when I exited her, my left leg collapsed from it's previously held position, and the ecstasy quickly turned into a charlie horse. She was a doll about it though, but falling apart on the second "date" was a bit embarrassing.

[macgruber]

This one's not as bad as a lot that have been posted, but still....

So I'm helping my gf watch the house of her grandma, (how many dudes hope it'll be a granny fuck story?) cause he grandma is out of town for a couple of days (sorry bros). Apearrently the neighbourhood is kinda sketchy, neighbours might steal shiot and whatever.

In the evening we're starting some nice touchy/feely/getting hot foreplay. At a certain moment my girl starts to get down on me, sucking my dick. I love it when she takes initiative. But after a few minutes she gets a phone call. Her grandma. She has to awnser, cause else grandma will get worried. So after a few things said (i don't know what, they speak russian) my girl goes into sucking my dick and talking on the phone, like making the "hmhm uhu"  sound to grandma. It was kinda akward, but at the same time pretty fucking awesome.

marriage material