tricks ‘n’ tips on how to fart

[artless]

Wonder if Dave Carnieknows a good recipe as he wrote that article on the poocano back in the day.

[Andmoreagain]

Wow so many good fart descriptions! I am going to remember this and pass them off as my own jokes in front of my friends. Thanks guys!

[TheBoognish]

The anti-inflammatory pills I’ve been taking for my back have my stomach feeling weird and have turned my asshole into a high-performance trombone. I am making sounds I have never made before and it’s hilarious.

I’ve been sending voice messages of my farts to my best friend on Messenger all morning, and yes, even at almost 33 that shit will always remain funny to me.

Think I’m ready to join a jazz quartet.

[Esquivel]

https://www.mygreekdish.com/recipe/beef-stifado-mosharaki-stifado/

My mom cooked this dish for a family dinner when i was still in primary school and my farts made my mate (who had to share the desk with me the next day) literally sick. He had to go puke and he said he also had the fever because of the smell. A couple of days later, when all the farting was over, i had to take a shower and have my clothes washed because i stank. Never experienced anything like this. Even my sweat smelled of fart, but of the really sick kind that resembles actual shit. When i met some family members who also attended the same dinner, they kept complaining about how that dish made everyone fart like crazy.

I hope this post helps people find the holy grail.

[Sick_McCrank_]

Garlic on all the things.

Pasta with Tomato sauce with insane amounts of onions (and garlic obviously).

[Freelancevagrant]

Due to my line of work, I say tread lightly if you follow this advice. I’ve had to clean up the remnants, and it’s not pretty.

Go to 7-11, get yourself a monster, some hot Cheetos and a milk, and slam all that shit and smoke a few Marlboro lights. After your balanced breakfast, make sure you do an insane amount of hard work in the sun and don’t drink any water. Then, around 1030-1100 hit the roach coach, at this point it doesn’t matter what you eat because you’re guts are going to be a fucking warzone. But unlike Ray Beez, you can forget all about the warzone women, because you’re on a collision course with a hot portapotty and no toilet paper. BUT, you will not forget the struggle or the streaks.

Hell, just last week I was cleaning portapotties in a subdivision and I saw a dude joking around with his pals when he tried to push out a fart, this man had clearly followed the directions to a T. He sprinted across the street to a toilet I was about to clean, because shit had exploded up his back and down his jeans. He stood in there and cleaned himself up while waiting for his buddy to bring him a set of coveralls to change into. Dude put the coveralls on and went back to work in Texas heat, but left his shit covered clothing inside the toilet bowl, which he had also fucking demolished and managed to miss.