real confessions

[Easy Slider]

Coming up 3 years sober from alcohol.
Tbh I’m inching closer everyday to a severe relapse.

Don't. I know the feeling, but really bro, it would be a shame. Stay strong.

[fineslime]

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So... I've been hooking up with this girl who has commitment issues. She came from a toxic relationship that ended 4 months ago. She says she likes me and the sentiment is true, but we both hook up with other people (i admit i do it just to inflate my ego). When we're together it's great and I can see that what she feels is true. I'll be moving to another apartment and I'm having family issues, I feel like I'm in a transitional period. With that in mind, I decided to limit the relationship until the end of the year, but i'm so anxious. I really like her and I want her to work, but I don't know what to do for this thing work out... What do you guys have to say to me?

[close]

Yeah it didn't worked out

@brucewillis - what ended up happening, if you don't mind me asking? I related a lot to your post. I've been in a transitional period this past year and it's kept me from trying to date or get into a relationship. I hope you're okay with how everything went down!

[Baglady]

Thank you
@jewelrunner and @Easyslider
Much love. I hear you. I have those days and sometimes quickly justify falling off the wagon but some affirmations always help. And kind words like I read here.

[brucewillis]

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So... I've been hooking up with this girl who has commitment issues. She came from a toxic relationship that ended 4 months ago. She says she likes me and the sentiment is true, but we both hook up with other people (i admit i do it just to inflate my ego). When we're together it's great and I can see that what she feels is true. I'll be moving to another apartment and I'm having family issues, I feel like I'm in a transitional period. With that in mind, I decided to limit the relationship until the end of the year, but i'm so anxious. I really like her and I want her to work, but I don't know what to do for this thing work out... What do you guys have to say to me?

[close]

Yeah it didn't worked out

[close]

@brucewillis - what ended up happening, if you don't mind me asking? I related a lot to your post. I've been in a transitional period this past year and it's kept me from trying to date or get into a relationship. I hope you're okay with how everything went down!

@fineslime Well... It lasted just over three months. She reconnected with her ex, it turns out they both had unfinished business. To be honest I don't know if they are back together. She blocked me right after she "broke up" with me, our relastionship didn't have a label (which really bothered me). Soon after, I ended up going out with my high school crush and we continued to see each other. We've been dating for a month now and it's been wonderful, I see reciprocity and now I know what it's like to not be the only one trying to make the relationship work. Looking back I think I had an unhealthy obsession with making things work with the other girl, now i can also see all her toxic and manipulative traits. I'm very glad with your concern my friend, makes me feel hugged! Everything is great here, I'm in love with someone who also truly loves me! Feel free to DM me if you want to talk about your situation and i also hope everything turn out the best for you, much love homie!

[Creachteach]

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I havent been sober for longer than a day in months. I started smoking weed and fucking fell in love. I cannot go a day without smoking or drinking. On top of that I just started my studies and cuz im a youngbuck living by myself is a challenge too. Being fucked up everyday does not help getting trough school, work and life, but i still cant see myself being sober.

Also I really cant talk about this shit with anyone, I only got a handfull of friends most of them couldnt give a fuck and my relationship with my parrents is fucked.

Running out of funds is gonna happen at some point too. Weed and beer is hella expencive in finland.

[close]

Check out the Sobriety thread, other pals are struggling with these issues or can give advice and support.

[close]

Reading it actually helped a lot now im a week sober and going on strong feeling a lot better also going to therapy helped a lot too

Is that you mr. Seppänen?

[DOOMSDAY]

My fiancee of a year and girlfriend of 3 years prior (4 years total) left me about a month and a half ago, and I'm completely fucked from it. I've been through break-ups and shit before, I've been suffering from clinical depression since I was a teenager, became addicted to Adderall and nearly overdosed twice, shit I attempted to take my own life at 18, but I'd honestly rather be dead than feel the way I have from this.

I started skating more again, and getting back on my mountain bike, but it all feels so empty. I know that I need to be. doing things I love for myself, I've been spending as much time as possible with friends and family, and allowing myself to feel and process the emotions I've been feeling; all the stuff you're supposed to do.

But to be honest, I'm just fucking tired of it. I've nearly relapsed several times, I'm smoking copious amounts of weed, nothing brings me any joy anymore, and I feel like the things I am doing are just a form of passive suicidal ideation. Because I don't want to take my own life and cause the people I love pain and suffering, but I want someone to take the pain and suffering away from me.

[EAT PUSSY!]

My fiancee of a year and girlfriend of 3 years prior (4 years total) left me about a month and a half ago, and I'm completely fucked from it. I've been through break-ups and shit before, I've been suffering from clinical depression since I was a teenager, became addicted to Adderall and nearly overdosed twice, shit I attempted to take my own life at 18, but I'd honestly rather be dead than feel the way I have from this.

I started skating more again, and getting back on my mountain bike, but it all feels so empty. I know that I need to be. doing things I love for myself, I've been spending as much time as possible with friends and family, and allowing myself to feel and process the emotions I've been feeling; all the stuff you're supposed to do.

But to be honest, I'm just fucking tired of it. I've nearly relapsed several times, I'm smoking copious amounts of weed, nothing brings me any joy anymore, and I feel like the things I am doing are just a form of passive suicidal ideation. Because I don't want to take my own life and cause the people I love pain and suffering, but I want someone to take the pain and suffering away from me.

been to break up recently also, these stoic videos are the best things i found so far

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhYVdeXvLYg

specially this part: https://youtu.be/YhYVdeXvLYg?si=RIHYtCiiRHesSuxM&t=620

[DOOMSDAY]

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My fiancee of a year and girlfriend of 3 years prior (4 years total) left me about a month and a half ago, and I'm completely fucked from it. I've been through break-ups and shit before, I've been suffering from clinical depression since I was a teenager, became addicted to Adderall and nearly overdosed twice, shit I attempted to take my own life at 18, but I'd honestly rather be dead than feel the way I have from this.

I started skating more again, and getting back on my mountain bike, but it all feels so empty. I know that I need to be. doing things I love for myself, I've been spending as much time as possible with friends and family, and allowing myself to feel and process the emotions I've been feeling; all the stuff you're supposed to do.

But to be honest, I'm just fucking tired of it. I've nearly relapsed several times, I'm smoking copious amounts of weed, nothing brings me any joy anymore, and I feel like the things I am doing are just a form of passive suicidal ideation. Because I don't want to take my own life and cause the people I love pain and suffering, but I want someone to take the pain and suffering away from me.

[close]

been to break up recently also, these stoic videos are the best things i found so far

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhYVdeXvLYg

specially this part: https://youtu.be/YhYVdeXvLYg?si=RIHYtCiiRHesSuxM&t=620

Thank you so much for this, it’s so fucking tough to avoid being self-destructive. I’ll be giving this a listen throughout my day

[Allen.]

Coming up 3 years sober from alcohol.
Tbh I’m inching closer everyday to a severe relapse.

The fact that you’re aware of it is better than nothing. Just please, think about all of the clarity and what not sobriety has (presumably) brought you. I believe in you.

[Kumiko]

Sometimes I wish the people I'm closest with would do something horrible to me so I could cut contact with everyone and move some place where no one knows me. I wouldn't even want to "start over" or anything like that. I'd just want to eke out a quiet lil life free of responsibility and obligation. But I also kinda did that once already and was horribly depressed and lonely. I guess I just miss having so much time to myself and interests sometimes.

[Skibb]

Sometimes I wish the people I'm closest with would do something horrible to me so I could cut contact with everyone and move some place where no one knows me. I wouldn't even want to "start over" or anything like that. I'd just want to eke out a quiet lil life free of responsibility and obligation. But I also kinda did that once already and was horribly depressed and lonely. I guess I just miss having so much time to myself and interests sometimes.

Why do you feel your close ones stop you from having time to yourself? We talking kids here? Friends/family?

[Blind Fisherman]

I've come to realize I only really post on here when I'm in the midst of a depressive episode. I feel like I have an easier time voicing my opinions here when I'm in that way because, in my mind while spiraling, none of this shit really matters and I see the futility in it all. I can let my guard down for once, but what is it worth if it's only while I'm on a downswing?

[Kumiko]

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Sometimes I wish the people I'm closest with would do something horrible to me so I could cut contact with everyone and move some place where no one knows me. I wouldn't even want to "start over" or anything like that. I'd just want to eke out a quiet lil life free of responsibility and obligation. But I also kinda did that once already and was horribly depressed and lonely. I guess I just miss having so much time to myself and interests sometimes.

[close]

Why do you feel your close ones stop you from having time to yourself? We talking kids here? Friends/family?

I wouldn't say they stop me from having time to myself, just that I don't have as much time as when I was single and friendless and there's a small part of me that misses being totally free and unknown. I certainly don't prefer it to what I've got going now - I just get caught up in "grass is greener" kind of thinking even though I've been on both sides of the fence now.

[xandeo]

Just go traveling by yourself for a week or two (if you can get away). I'm busy as hell with small kids, friends and general social life (kids and their program fill up the weekends pretty fast), but I also travel 50% of my work time and after a day or two I actually start missing (and appreciate) the craziness/busy life back home. It's nice to belong. 

[Garbage Collector]

ive been skating for 13 years, put out footy and got sorta flow, moved cities and picked up a trade, but still… all i can think about is skateboarding and i still feel like the biggest poser, getting vibed out by 16 year olds in baggy pants.

its probably self esteem related but i dont feel like a “skateboarder” and dont think i get to call myself one. i feel identity-less still , like when i had first started.

[T4T]

One time I took my car to the garage because my headlights were dim, had put in brand new ultra-bright bulbs and it barely helped. The young guy I was explaining the issue to said "let me have a look" then wiped both the headlights with a microfibre cloth. He then said "T4T, mate, they're filthy. Nothing wrong with them"

I've never felt more stupid in all my life.

[fineslime]

ive been skating for 13 years, put out footy and got sorta flow, moved cities and picked up a trade, but still… all i can think about is skateboarding and i still feel like the biggest poser, getting vibed out by 16 year olds in baggy pants.

its probably self esteem related but i dont feel like a “skateboarder” and dont think i get to call myself one. i feel identity-less still , like when i had first started.

much like Groove, skateboarding is in the heart. I don't skate much at all these days because of a knee injury, but I'm 20+ years deep and I am a skateboarder above all else.

try not to overthink it <3

[turdtastic]

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ive been skating for 13 years, put out footy and got sorta flow, moved cities and picked up a trade, but still… all i can think about is skateboarding and i still feel like the biggest poser, getting vibed out by 16 year olds in baggy pants.

its probably self esteem related but i dont feel like a “skateboarder” and dont think i get to call myself one. i feel identity-less still , like when i had first started.

[close]

much like Groove, skateboarding is in the heart. I don't skate much at all these days because of a knee injury, but I'm 20+ years deep and I am a skateboarder above all else.

try not to overthink it <3

I feel this, hawrd.
75% of my life I’ve been loving skateboarding, even though I’ve always been shit at it and unfortunately do it less and less these days.
It’s informed so much of my tastes/perspective in life, I don’t know how else to identify; other than as a big turd…

[Garbage Collector]

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ive been skating for 13 years, put out footy and got sorta flow, moved cities and picked up a trade, but still… all i can think about is skateboarding and i still feel like the biggest poser, getting vibed out by 16 year olds in baggy pants.

its probably self esteem related but i dont feel like a “skateboarder” and dont think i get to call myself one. i feel identity-less still , like when i had first started.

[close]

much like Groove, skateboarding is in the heart. I don't skate much at all these days because of a knee injury, but I'm 20+ years deep and I am a skateboarder above all else.

try not to overthink it <3

[close]

I feel this, hawrd.
75% of my life I’ve been loving skateboarding, even though I’ve always been shit at it and unfortunately do it less and less these days.
It’s informed so much of my tastes/perspective in life, I don’t know how else to identify; other than as a big turd…

turdberder

[SneakySecrets]

Whenever I tell a barber/hair stylist how I’d like my hair, I always just tell them “whatever you want” and just see what happens. 

[mynameisnotjeff]

Whenever I tell a barber/hair stylist how I’d like my hair, I always just tell them “whatever you want” and just see what happens.

I've been burned by this and it's rough.

Now to add on to the topic:
I get a comb over and have dabbled with fades.

I have hot dog neck and it's the only thing stopping me from getting them again.

[Madam, I'm Adam]

ive been skating for 13 years, put out footy and got sorta flow, moved cities and picked up a trade, but still… all i can think about is skateboarding and i still feel like the biggest poser, getting vibed out by 16 year olds in baggy pants.

its probably self esteem related but i dont feel like a “skateboarder” and dont think i get to call myself one. i feel identity-less still , like when i had first started.

Dude, 13 years deep, footage, flow, still skating - anybody who doesn't think you skate or vibes you out is a complete moron.

I get how as you get older you may feel less attuned to whatever cultural elements of skating are in place at the moment, which can in turn influence your identity, but I would say just the fact that you're skating and enjoying it is the important thing.

[mrselfdestruct]

my balls itch

[Garbage Collector]

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ive been skating for 13 years, put out footy and got sorta flow, moved cities and picked up a trade, but still… all i can think about is skateboarding and i still feel like the biggest poser, getting vibed out by 16 year olds in baggy pants.

its probably self esteem related but i dont feel like a “skateboarder” and dont think i get to call myself one. i feel identity-less still , like when i had first started.

[close]

Dude, 13 years deep, footage, flow, still skating - anybody who doesn't think you skate or vibes you out is a complete moron.

I get how as you get older you may feel less attuned to whatever cultural elements of skating are in place at the moment, which can in turn influence your identity, but I would say just the fact that you're skating and enjoying it is the important thing.

yeah you hit the nail on the head. im in a “career” trade job now, and even though ive always worked 5 day a week, i feel so unsynced from skating sometimes cuz i still see homies chasing the bag when i go on social media and im in a completely diff world now. im 26, and im tired of check to check. maybe thats just becoming an adult.


i dont understand why sometimes skaters seeing setting yourself up for a good future as a bad thing or giving up. maybe its not just skating and this happens to a lot of friend groups tho.  i wish i met more like minded people that just wanna do the thing and have their shit together lol. at some age it stops being cool to be a burnout. im not on some A Tate shit but its annoying to hear a friend that works 2 days a week complain about money

[Easy Slider]

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ive been skating for 13 years, put out footy and got sorta flow, moved cities and picked up a trade, but still… all i can think about is skateboarding and i still feel like the biggest poser, getting vibed out by 16 year olds in baggy pants.

its probably self esteem related but i dont feel like a “skateboarder” and dont think i get to call myself one. i feel identity-less still , like when i had first started.

[close]

Dude, 13 years deep, footage, flow, still skating - anybody who doesn't think you skate or vibes you out is a complete moron.

I get how as you get older you may feel less attuned to whatever cultural elements of skating are in place at the moment, which can in turn influence your identity, but I would say just the fact that you're skating and enjoying it is the important thing.

[close]

yeah you hit the nail on the head. im in a “career” trade job now, and even though ive always worked 5 day a week, i feel so unsynced from skating sometimes cuz i still see homies chasing the bag when i go on social media and im in a completely diff world now. im 26, and im tired of check to check. maybe thats just becoming an adult.


i dont understand why sometimes skaters seeing setting yourself up for a good future as a bad thing or giving up. maybe its not just skating and this happens to a lot of friend groups tho.  i wish i met more like minded people that just wanna do the thing and have their shit together lol. at some age it stops being cool to be a burnout. im not on some A Tate shit but its annoying to hear a friend that works 2 days a week complain about money

What are you doing in the old dude thread, young buck? Don‘t waste your time with social media or dudes vibing you. Go to work, get paid, skate in the evening or morning and on the weekends. You are doing good bro.

[Garbage Collector]

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ive been skating for 13 years, put out footy and got sorta flow, moved cities and picked up a trade, but still… all i can think about is skateboarding and i still feel like the biggest poser, getting vibed out by 16 year olds in baggy pants.

its probably self esteem related but i dont feel like a “skateboarder” and dont think i get to call myself one. i feel identity-less still , like when i had first started.

[close]

Dude, 13 years deep, footage, flow, still skating - anybody who doesn't think you skate or vibes you out is a complete moron.

I get how as you get older you may feel less attuned to whatever cultural elements of skating are in place at the moment, which can in turn influence your identity, but I would say just the fact that you're skating and enjoying it is the important thing.

[close]

yeah you hit the nail on the head. im in a “career” trade job now, and even though ive always worked 5 day a week, i feel so unsynced from skating sometimes cuz i still see homies chasing the bag when i go on social media and im in a completely diff world now. im 26, and im tired of check to check. maybe thats just becoming an adult.


i dont understand why sometimes skaters seeing setting yourself up for a good future as a bad thing or giving up. maybe its not just skating and this happens to a lot of friend groups tho.  i wish i met more like minded people that just wanna do the thing and have their shit together lol. at some age it stops being cool to be a burnout. im not on some A Tate shit but its annoying to hear a friend that works 2 days a week complain about money

[close]

What are you doing in the old dude thread, young buck? Don‘t waste your time with social media or dudes vibing you. Go to work, get paid, skate in the evening or morning and on the weekends. You are doing good bro.

well i relate more to you “old dudes” who wanna do their thing and dont have time for the bullshit and imo youre not old till you quit skating lol! but thanks guys appreciate you all on here

[somethingmustbreaknow]

after skateboarding for nearly 24 years, i don't know anything about wheelbase. and i don't want this to change, ever.

[Prostate Exam]

Today I had to help out one of my coworkers with some software stuff. His office is wall to wall with the toilets and turns out, you can hear pretty much everything that happens in those toilets from where he sits. He basically sits back to back with whoever is taking a shit. So if I heard a guy just quietly coughing in there I wonder what else he could hear whenever I was taking a shit there.

I usually unleash total anal assault on these toilets whenever I raided the All-You-Can-Eat Indian buffet the day before.

Now I can barely look the guy in the eye

[hmmoookay]

after skateboarding for nearly 24 years, i don't know anything about wheelbase. and i don't want this to change, ever.

if it ain't broke

[fakie nollie]

after skateboarding for nearly 24 years, i don't know anything about wheelbase. and i don't want this to change, ever.

It’s the biggest burden once you go down the rabbit hole. Ignorance is bliss