real confessions

[Sizzle]

We were learning adjectives in 9th grade Spanish class and the teacher was kinda testing our vocab by asking us to all look at someone that had something with that adjective. So she'd say - "everyone point at someone with something azul" and we'd all point at a kid wearing a blue shirt or something. Then she tells the class - "everyone point at someone with something poquito" and the class is scanning around and then it starts happening. One set of eyes staring at me and pointing. Two. Three. The whole class stares at points at me for having something small. They all burst into laughter while I just sit there blushing with my poquito self-esteem.

I don’t mean to be insensitive but did everybody just assume you had a small dick?

[BallparkFrank]

My right armpit sweats way more than my left one, especially when I’m driving.

Also secretly love the song Little Bitty by Alan Jackson.

[brucewillis]

Brazil will be this year's winner of the world cup and i am VERY hyped on this.

I was wrong. And now I'm depressed.

[KinkyRailsRailed4u]

Dear Holy father of Gonzales, Reynolds, and Penny;

My heart is filled with sinful chaos and confusion. Lord, I am struggling with something that I know will consume me if I don't figure out how to stop it. Right now, Lord, I am struggling with lust - lust for tricks and brands that exist outside your glory. I have diligently followed you in rejecting varial kickflips, nollie lipslides, and other illegal tricks since I was but 12 years old.

But now, Lord---now, I am having feelings that I just don't know how to handle, but I know you do. I have seen a pair of bright yellow Andy Anderson Etnies shoes with the lace covers. I have spent much time admiring them and thinking about what their board feel is like and how they glow like a brilliant star so alluringly in the soft light of my iPhone screen. My thoughts have not always remained on the pure side of admiration though Lord. I don't always think about just looking at them or touching them. My thoughts turn far more salacious at times - I think of wearing them, of pushing around in them, of pairing them with my Polar Big Boys. Lord I am ashamed to say it but you already know my heart and with my honesty I hope you will give me the power to resist temptation.

Transform my thoughts and let me understand how marvelous you're goodness has made me. I really need the strength and peace that only You can give.

In your name,

Amen

[devils acrobat]

I will include you in my prayers @KinkyRailsRailed4u

[AR abstain]

i watched gringo papi and it wasn't that bad.
"Pico de Gallo!"     

[matt_2993]

I was really eating ass last night

[thanksgiving]

i watched gringo papi and it wasn't that bad.
"Pico de Gallo!"     

worst one here

[Prostate Exam]

I was really eating ass last night

With some fries on the side?

[matt_2993]

Got laid. Cheers felllas.

[Prostate Exam]

Got laid. Cheers felllas.

When was the wedding?

[L33Tg33k]

Got laid. Cheers felllas.

Bastard! Have a gnar.

[Gray Imp Sausage Metal]

Dear Holy father of Gonzales, Reynolds, and Penny;

My heart is filled with sinful chaos and confusion. Lord, I am struggling with something that I know will consume me if I don't figure out how to stop it. Right now, Lord, I am struggling with lust - lust for tricks and brands that exist outside your glory. I have diligently followed you in rejecting varial kickflips, nollie lipslides, and other illegal tricks since I was but 12 years old.

But now, Lord---now, I am having feelings that I just don't know how to handle, but I know you do. I have seen a pair of bright yellow Andy Anderson Etnies shoes with the lace covers. I have spent much time admiring them and thinking about what their board feel is like and how they glow like a brilliant star so alluringly in the soft light of my iPhone screen. My thoughts have not always remained on the pure side of admiration though Lord. I don't always think about just looking at them or touching them. My thoughts turn far more salacious at times - I think of wearing them, of pushing around in them, of pairing them with my Polar Big Boys. Lord I am ashamed to say it but you already know my heart and with my honesty I hope you will give me the power to resist temptation.

Transform my thoughts and let me understand how marvelous you're goodness has made me. I really need the strength and peace that only You can give.

In your name,

Amen

okay I’ve seen some fucked up confessions in my time, but you sir need some serious help

[matty_c]

Those cpap machines sound like white noise my mums got one

Waaay better off using one of them instead of snoring real bad imo

[CrumblingInfrastructure]

Those cpap machines sound like white noise my mums got one

Waaay better off using one of them instead of snoring real bad imo

I was hooking up with this poly “throuple” for almost a year on the regular and all three of them had to sleep with cpaps on. That noise will put me down quicker then ambien to this day. If you throw NPR on top of it im out for the count.

[SneakySecrets]

I would do very very naughty things with Megyn Kelly.

[Coastal Fever]

That’s hardly a confession, dude.  If we’re gonna simp over right wing women let’s at least pick unconventionally sexy ones… MTG or Roseanne or someone.

[SneakySecrets]

That’s hardly a confession, dude.  If we’re gonna simp over right wing women let’s at least pick unconventionally sexy ones… MTG or Roseanne or someone.

Ew.

How about some Kayleigh McEnany.

[lazer69]

I'm sexually attracted to Casey Anthony

[Terminal]

I watched two Aaron Kyro clips last night

[Jewel Runner]

I watched two Aaron Kyro clips last night

The question is "did you enjoy it?"

[tuesday]

[Terminal]

Expand Quote

I watched two Aaron Kyro clips last night

[close]

The question is "did you enjoy it?"

Alright, full confession. I didn't watch all of them, maybe 3-5 mins of each. Did I enjoy? More curious than anything, but no need to go back down that rabbit hole.

[ok boomer]

I'm sexually attracted to Casey Anthony

samesiez

[SneakySecrets]

In any movie more complicated than a romcom, I’m confused at what’s going on like at least 30% of the time.

If it’s some military espionage movie, it could go as high as 90% of the movie I don’t know what the fuck is going on.

[doublesteveburger]

In any movie more complicated than a romcom, I’m confused at what’s going on like at least 30% of the time.

If it’s some military espionage movie, it could go as high as 90% of the movie I don’t know what the fuck is going on.

dude, same


but i'd say it's more related to i just don't give a fuck about what i'm watching and just need to distract my brain from forming any sense of cohesion for the next two hours

[Madam, I'm Adam]

Expand Quote

That’s hardly a confession, dude.  If we’re gonna simp over right wing women let’s at least pick unconventionally sexy ones… MTG or Roseanne or someone.

[close]

Ew.

How about some Kayleigh McEnany.

Lauren Boebert for me.