Skateboarding conspiracies thread

[CoMpLeMeNts4U]

Not only has no one ever purchased a pair of Diamond shoes, they never actually existed at all.

I believe this. Same with ammo skateboards, never really existed. Theres a Felix connection there. Dudes in deep on slap though so I can't go any further.

[shripshrapper]

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Not only has no one ever purchased a pair of Diamond shoes, they never actually existed at all.

[close]

I believe this. Same with ammo skateboards, never really existed. Theres a Felix connection there. Dudes in deep on slap though so I can't go any further.

I also don't believe manny santiago is a real person. Crisis actor all the way.

[DadBod]

I try to get Bronze hardware if I can but it doesn't really matter. Would be down to support Bender or something too if it throws them a couple bucks.  I grabbed some Indy hardware a while ago not really thinking about it and looking at the little iron crosses drove me crazy. Indy is corny as hell and I'm AWAKE.  Had to switch them out after a couple sessions.

 Benders got the best fuvkin boltz

[cloudy]

stella reynolds is a mole placed at element by andrew reynolds as part of an elaborate industrial espionage ploy. all as payback for them backing up the brinks truck to tk and thereby catalyzing his downward spiral into lunacy. and because they stole miner from emerica. and because johnny schillereff is a kook.

reynolds found out that someone turned down this year's soty. was it meant to go to evan smith, good friend of tyson peterson? speaking of tyson, isn't he rumored to be of element and heading to baker?

[ihatejulio]

Companies leak their own videos onto Pornhub to capitalize on the hype involved in viewing a video that could potentially be pulled within a day or two. The sense of urgency to watch it before it gets pulled gets strong initial viewership and more eyes on the brand.

[LostBearings]

stella reynolds is a mole placed at element by andrew reynolds as part of an elaborate industrial espionage ploy. all as payback for them backing up the brinks truck to tk and thereby catalyzing his downward spiral into lunacy. and because they stole miner from emerica. and because johnny schillereff is a kook.

reynolds found out that someone turned down this year's soty. was it meant to go to evan smith, good friend of tyson peterson? speaking of tyson, isn't he rumored to be of element and heading to baker?

Wouldn't be surprised. Baker picked up Jacopo Carozzi from element.

[planman]

Pretty sure Quasi was actually behind the PH leak of Mother

[heckler]

I don't think they were but I'm pretty sure Baker leaked Baker Has A Deathwish like, ten years back this April. It was on a Filefront server and the one uploaded is different than the final version of the video on the DVD.

[jakeumms]

Pretty sure Quasi was actually behind the PH leak of Mother

That was what was claimed on Skateline at the time.

[Francis Xavier]

I don't think they were but I'm pretty sure Baker leaked Baker Has A Deathwish like, ten years back this April. It was on a Filefront server and the one uploaded is different than the final version of the video on the DVD.

I had a homie that got his hands on a burned copy of that version well before it was even a thing. Only watched it once and I barely remember the differences

[Atiba Applebum]

Pretty sure Quasi was actually behind the PH leak of Mother

I think Justin Henry said something to that effect because they wanted it to be seen before a song got pulled

[yapple dapple]

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stella reynolds is a mole placed at element by andrew reynolds as part of an elaborate industrial espionage ploy. all as payback for them backing up the brinks truck to tk and thereby catalyzing his downward spiral into lunacy. and because they stole miner from emerica. and because johnny schillereff is a kook.

reynolds found out that someone turned down this year's soty. was it meant to go to evan smith, good friend of tyson peterson? speaking of tyson, isn't he rumored to be of element and heading to baker?

[close]

Wouldn't be surprised. Baker picked up Jacopo Carozzi from element.

My 1st and last element board was the one that said "Stone". I'm developing mine own style I call "stone core".
I only wear colors that are in rock form, as I carry black tourmaline in my pocket every day. Is there something to this?
I don't know.

[sizzle_chest]

Phelps died last year after that slam on the hill bomb. He is now a programmable tool of the skateboard industry.

High Speed had him on life support for a few months after he slammed on his head and slipped into a coma. They were ready to pull the plug but then Koston and Berra stepped in and proposed an already outlined plan they had for themselves to keep the Berrics alive after they died.

High Speed sold Phelps' decrepit shell for an undisclosed amount. Since he already looked half-dead before, most people never noticed Phelps was now a fully dead Berrics programmed robot.

Reynolds and Greco were leaked the project details and they wanted in. They invested heavily, signed the NDA and voila: Foy became SOTY.

On September 23rd of this year Dill and AVE, via their own mole, Mulder (Richard), obtained blueprints of Phelpsbot's infrastructure, hacked the OS and took control of him remotely, hence TJ is now SOTY.

Berra is super pissed.

This fight over Phelpsbot will continue for the end of time.

[Matthew_James]

Phelps died last year after that slam on the hill bomb. He is now a programmable tool of the skateboard industry.

High Speed had him on life support for a few months after he slammed on his head and slipped into a coma. They were ready to pull the plug but then Koston and Berra stepped in and proposed an already outlined plan they had for themselves to keep the Berrics alive after they died.

High Speed sold Phelps' decrepit shell for an undisclosed amount. Since he already looked half-dead before, most people never noticed Phelps was now a fully dead Berrics programmed robot.

Reynolds and Greco were leaked the project details and they wanted in. They invested heavily, signed the NDA and voila: Foy became SOTY.

On September 23rd of this year Dill and AVE, via their own mole, Mulder (Richard), obtained blueprints of Phelpsbot's infrastructure, hacked the OS and took control of him remotely, hence TJ is now SOTY.

Berra is super pissed.

This fight over Phelpsbot will continue for the end of time.

I knew the Scientology angle that Dill always took up with Borra was a cover for his true intentions...

[shitdick22]

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Pretty sure Quasi was actually behind the PH leak of Mother

[close]

I think Justin Henry said something to that effect because they wanted it to be seen before a song got pulled

Pretty sure Paul Young posted it up there after it got copyright blocked on youtube.

[Shifty Flip]

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stella reynolds is a mole placed at element by andrew reynolds as part of an elaborate industrial espionage ploy. all as payback for them backing up the brinks truck to tk and thereby catalyzing his downward spiral into lunacy. and because they stole miner from emerica. and because johnny schillereff is a kook.

reynolds found out that someone turned down this year's soty. was it meant to go to evan smith, good friend of tyson peterson? speaking of tyson, isn't he rumored to be of element and heading to baker?

[close]

Wouldn't be surprised. Baker picked up Jacopo Carozzi from element.

[close]

My 1st and last element board was the one that said "Stone". I'm developing mine own style I call "stone core".
I only wear colors that are in rock form, as I carry black tourmaline in my pocket every day. Is there something to this?
I don't know.

Black in my pocket, watermelon on my neck. Fully flexin on the cosmos kid.

[pdknox]

red bull gives you male pattern baldness.  think about it you guys

[Krooked antihero]

red bull gives you male pattern baldness.  think about it you guys

Don’t worry mate, I’m sure atleast half of Slap is there already(me included) 😄

[whorific]

I have a theory that Shawn Powers must have some serious blackmail dirt on the owner of Palace, because he is seriously the corniest dude out there. Why a company like that would fuck with such a kook is beyond me. I would pay to watch a video of him getting hoe slapped.

his lines are automatic he don't give a fuck , lofi in the streets fo realz yo

[Allen.]

The WKND dudes (mainly via Grant) are able to skate all those houses because they’re actually empty and friend of WKND Danny Montoya is a real estate agent.

Also I think Grant edited in audio of a dog barking in ‘Who’s to Say’.

[MOE SYZLAK]

The WKND dudes (mainly via Grant) are able to skate all those houses because they’re actually empty and friend of WKND Danny Montoya is a real estate agent.

Also I think Grant edited in audio of a dog barking in ‘Who’s to Say’.

I know he did in Taylor 'Big Dahg" Caruso's welcome part

[Pigeon]

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red bull gives you male pattern baldness.  think about it you guys

[close]

Don’t worry mate, I’m sure atleast half of Slap is there already(me included) 😄

It’s probably caused from drinking/dehydration and lack of nutrients. I’m surprised no skateboarder has come out with hair gel/pomade since skateboarders selling non-skateboarding related items have more marketability these days. It’s probably a conspiracy to sell hats, though.

[Murge]

stella reynolds is a mole placed at element by andrew reynolds as part of an elaborate industrial espionage ploy. all as payback for them backing up the brinks truck to tk and thereby catalyzing his downward spiral into lunacy. and because they stole miner from emerica. and because johnny schillereff is a kook.

reynolds found out that someone turned down this year's soty. was it meant to go to evan smith, good friend of tyson peterson? speaking of tyson, isn't he rumored to be of element and heading to baker?

I believe.

Even if Stella is not intentionally spying she may just run her mouth to Reynolds and he’s like hell yeah thanks for the tip here’s some ice cream.

[C. R. E. A. M]

Tom Penny taking some bad drugs having a lasting effect around  97ish.. Then he disappeared for a few years to get his head straight

[Ducky Fucky]

The Earth is flat, dinosaurs are fake, satellite's are also fake. We didn't land on the moon.

[JamesFardy]

Braydon szarfranski was the ENTIRE emerica teams drug dealer but instead of paying him they let him be part of their crew and he got good enough to be on.

[pdknox]

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red bull gives you male pattern baldness.  think about it you guys

[close]

Don’t worry mate, I’m sure atleast half of Slap is there already(me included) 😄

[close]

It’s probably caused from drinking/dehydration and lack of nutrients. I’m surprised no skateboarder has come out with hair gel/pomade since skateboarders selling non-skateboarding related items have more marketability these days. It’s probably a conspiracy to sell hats, though.

which is why redbull requires contractually that their riders wear the hats

[E]

There's a conspiracy theory if you wear a hat a lot you go bald, I think the original joke is that red bull riders wear the hat all the time therefore they go bald...

[Luddite]

Reynolds and Ellington encouraged TK and Slash to have Instagram meltdowns in order to try to stir up some relevancy for them. TK’s backfired and he left to “make billions” and Slash seems to have gotten on Lakai as a result

[Madam, I'm Adam]

Maybe have mentioned this before, but I read an old Lib Tech ad like 15 or so years ago that said (in small lettering) how a lot of major board companies give their riders boards with their best wood while selling inferior wood to the public. The ad went on to say that Lib Tech didn't do that, and gives the best wood, etc.

Don't know if that's true (and here I'm thinking of Elijah Berle solely riding the PS Stix 20th anniversary Girl boards even though it's way later) but it was disheartening at the time, although it didn't make me want to forego my favourite companies and buy a Lib Tech board. I took this thread way too seriously, huh.