Author Topic: Skateboarding conspiracies thread (Read 176828 times)

sizzle_chest · « **Reply #630 on:** March 17, 2019, 12:59:44 PM »

Quote from: sizzle_chest on December 07, 2018, 05:20:41 AM

Phelps died last year after that slam on the hill bomb. He is now a programmable tool of the skateboard industry.

High Speed had him on life support for a few months after he slammed on his head and slipped into a coma. They were ready to pull the plug but then Koston and Berra stepped in and proposed an already outlined plan they had for themselves to keep the Berrics alive after they died.

High Speed sold Phelps' decrepit shell for an undisclosed amount. Since he already looked half-dead before, most people never noticed Phelps was now a fully dead Berrics programmed robot.

Reynolds and Greco were leaked the project details and they wanted in. They invested heavily, signed the NDA and voila: Foy became SOTY.

On September 23rd of this year Dill and AVE, via their own mole, Mulder (Richard), obtained blueprints of Phelpsbot's infrastructure, hacked the OS and took control of him remotely, hence TJ is now SOTY.

Berra is super pissed.

This fight over Phelpsbot will continue for the end of time.

Saw this coming a while back. Obviously Berra is making his powermoves right after Transworld goes down, coincidentally.

redwine · « **Reply #631 on:** March 17, 2019, 02:17:26 PM »

Slap will disappear. Olympics. A new masonic skateboarding era will be instituted. They should have listened.

Shifty Flip · « **Reply #632 on:** March 17, 2019, 05:15:50 PM »

Jake Phelps was the one person keeping high speed from cancelling Slap . The "new server" is just preparation for the impending closer.
I've seen the future. Seymour will set up a Shalom shrine at Jake's grave, and with TK as our messiah, will lead us all to the promised land of Dirty Jersey to live with our God Fred Gall. There will also be monks saved.

Shalom

georgethecat · « **Reply #633 on:** March 17, 2019, 05:29:32 PM »

Quote from: superslopp on March 12, 2019, 11:47:24 AM

not exactly a conspiracy, but:

i've heard from several sources that the former mayor of the smallish city i live in blocked any and all attempts at building an inner-city skatepark purely out of spite. the rumor is that mike carroll 'broke his daughter's heart' and mr. (ex)mayor has held a grudge against skateboarders ever since. i do know that the city started confiscating boards and handing out trespassing tickets like candy during his run, but i don't know how much of that was his doing.

yo mike, what'd you do man?

Hurricane Helen? Katie? Who?!

conqueso · « **Reply #634 on:** March 18, 2019, 10:19:42 AM »

Neen is the catalyst for Jim greco's next transition into a latte drinking Lululemon crossfit yuppie

SneakySecrets · « **Reply #635 on:** March 18, 2019, 11:38:55 AM »

In middle school a kid on my bus told me that the Adidas logo was actually a pot leaf.

Dustwardprez · « **Reply #636 on:** March 18, 2019, 06:07:29 PM »

Is Mike Carrol costarring in “Hook” reboot?

Soft Boiled · « **Reply #637 on:** March 18, 2019, 06:43:42 PM »

Bam’s new wife was just a huge Bam/CKY/Jackass superfan that got lucky and married her hero, only to have his baby, get called a “street ho” on social media, and help create a ton of mud.

Now she has the privilege of getting finger blasted by Bam’s fat dirty digits, leaving all
those sweet rings he wears covered in goo.
WHOOP WHOOP!

Allen. · « **Reply #638 on:** March 18, 2019, 06:49:15 PM »

Quote from: Soft Boiled on March 18, 2019, 06:43:42 PM

finger blasted by Bam’s fat dirty digits

This was the most disgusting thing on slap in a minute.

Soft Boiled · « **Reply #639 on:** March 18, 2019, 06:54:04 PM »

I know, I’m sorry. I thought twice before hitting that Post button, but went ahead and did it anyway. #mudlife

Francis Xavier · « **Reply #640 on:** March 18, 2019, 07:21:36 PM »

Fat dirty mud digits

Dustwardprez · « **Reply #641 on:** March 23, 2019, 11:23:11 AM »

The feds are reading this message board.

paraquat · « **Reply #642 on:** March 23, 2019, 11:49:30 AM »

Muddy UTIs

NegativeCreep · « **Reply #643 on:** March 23, 2019, 09:06:13 PM »

doublesteveburger · « **Reply #644 on:** March 23, 2019, 09:15:24 PM »

Not really a conspiracy but I don’t want to start a new thread. Just came here to say I give it a year before Duffle and Foundation part ways. Dude is clearly bummed on the company and they’re about two boxes of blanks away from awkwardly saying bye.

Personally feel like dude deserves a “legend” spot on the roster but what the hell do I know I’m just a fucking cheeseburger.

Owen · « **Reply #645 on:** March 23, 2019, 11:09:23 PM »

Quote from: Rick Kane on March 18, 2019, 06:56:53 PM

Quote from: Soft Boiled on March 18, 2019, 06:43:42 PM
Expand Quote
Bam’s new wife was just a huge Bam/CKY/Jackass superfan that got lucky and married her hero, only to have his baby, get called a “street ho” on social media, and help create a ton of mud.

Now she has the privilege of getting finger blasted by Bam’s fat dirty digits, leaving all
those sweet rings he wears covered in goo.
WHOOP WHOOP!
[close]

That poor vagina...

Rings and all. God damn savage

Szechuan · « **Reply #646 on:** March 23, 2019, 11:57:29 PM »

Quote from: doublesteveburger on March 23, 2019, 09:15:24 PM

Not really a conspiracy but I don’t want to start a new thread. Just came here to say I give it a year before Duffle and Foundation part ways. Dude is clearly bummed on the company and they’re about two boxes of blanks away from awkwardly saying bye.

Personally feel like dude deserves a “legend” spot on the roster but what the hell do I know I’m just a fucking cheeseburger.

You're more than that. You're a Steveburger ❤

Ayanami · « **Reply #647 on:** March 24, 2019, 01:56:58 AM »

Quote from: Szechuan on March 23, 2019, 11:57:29 PM

Quote from: doublesteveburger on March 23, 2019, 09:15:24 PM
Expand Quote
Not really a conspiracy but I don’t want to start a new thread. Just came here to say I give it a year before Duffle and Foundation part ways. Dude is clearly bummed on the company and they’re about two boxes of blanks away from awkwardly saying bye.

Personally feel like dude deserves a “legend” spot on the roster but what the hell do I know I’m just a fucking cheeseburger.
[close]
You're more than that. You're a doublesteveburger ❤

Szechuan · « **Reply #648 on:** March 24, 2019, 03:20:58 AM »

Quote from: Ayanami on March 24, 2019, 01:56:58 AM

Quote from: Szechuan on March 23, 2019, 11:57:29 PM
Expand Quote
Quote from: doublesteveburger on March 23, 2019, 09:15:24 PM
Expand Quote
Not really a conspiracy but I don’t want to start a new thread. Just came here to say I give it a year before Duffle and Foundation part ways. Dude is clearly bummed on the company and they’re about two boxes of blanks away from awkwardly saying bye.

Personally feel like dude deserves a “legend” spot on the roster but what the hell do I know I’m just a fucking cheeseburger.
[close]
You're more than that. You're a doublesteveburger ❤
[close]

Thanks I meant to edit that.

belt · « **Reply #649 on:** March 24, 2019, 07:11:23 AM »

That tyshawn mob grip/hardies ad thread was taken down. Supreme=white supremacy overlords

element4life · « **Reply #650 on:** March 29, 2019, 04:51:37 PM »

phelps was offed in a conspiracy to sell new thrasher merch to make up for lack of hoodie sales in an effort to avoid going under like transworld

SneakySecrets · « **Reply #651 on:** March 29, 2019, 04:57:58 PM »

Officer Dick from the Tony Hawk games looks awfully like an overweight Adolf Hitler.

weon · « **Reply #652 on:** March 30, 2019, 03:08:29 AM »

Quote from: doublesteveburger on March 23, 2019, 09:15:24 PM

Not really a conspiracy but I don’t want to start a new thread. Just came here to say I give it a year before Duffle and Foundation part ways. Dude is clearly bummed on the company and they’re about two boxes of blanks away from awkwardly saying bye.

Personally feel like dude deserves a “legend” spot on the roster but what the hell do I know I’m just a fucking cheeseburger.

i heard he's gonna start a brand with his beloved friend daryl angel

riders sponsored by energy drinks have to clock in and out when they put their hat on and take it off, with different incentives for lengths of time and special situations. in the future when #thejah blows his street league money a sex tape of his will be released where he wears his monster hat through the whole thing an he'll suddenly be debt free.

Speakr · « **Reply #653 on:** March 30, 2019, 07:28:10 AM »

Quote from: SneakySecrets on March 29, 2019, 04:57:58 PM

Officer Dick from the Tony Hawk games looks awfully like an overweight Adolf Hitler.

Oh come on, now I feel bad.

augustmoon · « **Reply #654 on:** March 30, 2019, 07:38:31 AM »

Quote from: doublesteveburger on March 23, 2019, 09:15:24 PM

Not really a conspiracy but I don’t want to start a new thread. Just came here to say I give it a year before Duffle and Foundation part ways. Dude is clearly bummed on the company and they’re about two boxes of blanks away from awkwardly saying bye.

Personally feel like dude deserves a “legend” spot on the roster but what the hell do I know I’m just a fucking cheeseburger.

seems like they're just fucking with him at this point to see how far they can push him before he quits. Pathetic really, but doesn't surprise me coming from Foundation. I can't remember a time when Mike Sinclair wasn't a miserable cunt.

Allen. · « **Reply #655 on:** March 30, 2019, 08:07:17 AM »

p-rod has single picnic table tricks spliced together into lines in his Me Myself and I part.

element4life · « **Reply #656 on:** March 30, 2019, 09:15:52 AM »

Mark Appleyards real name is Mike

SHIREFLIP · « **Reply #657 on:** March 30, 2019, 10:24:21 AM »

The orange condom beanie was invented by big helmet just in time for the Olympics.

Comparatively, helmets will not look as stupid as they once did.

SpankerChief · « **Reply #658 on:** March 30, 2019, 08:00:47 PM »

who really controls the skate industry?! we've heard of the #metoo movement and we've heard of that scumbag Neal Hendrix and Julz plus many other sketchy instances.

The power dynamics and getting a leg up in the scene. I think there's a subversive and insidious pedophile conditioning that seems cruel much like an Olympic trainer turned abuser, look at Shecks and Nyjah there's something fucky with kids being groomed in the industry.

One has to be wary of older mentorship dudes hanging with young boys or girls. Unless it's a father or mother helping out it seems just a bit weird.

chris gentryfied · « **Reply #659 on:** March 30, 2019, 08:06:25 PM »

Quote from: SpankerChief on March 30, 2019, 08:00:47 PM

who really controls the skate industry?! we've heard of the #metoo movement and we've heard of that scumbag Neal Hendrix and Julz plus many other sketchy instances.

The power dynamics and getting a leg up in the scene. I think there's a subversive and insidious pedophile conditioning that seems cruel much like an Olympic trainer turned abuser, look at Shecks and Nyjah there's something fucky with kids being groomed in the industry.

One has to be wary of older mentorship dudes hanging with young boys or girls. Unless it's a father or mother helping out it seems just a bit weird.

old white men running this skate shit
corporate forces running this skate shit
tall Israelis running this skate shit
quasi homosexuals running this skate shit

Author Topic: Skateboarding conspiracies thread (Read 176828 times)

conqueso

Dustwardprez

Dustwardprez

NegativeCreep

doublesteveburger

SHIREFLIP