Losing interest in skateboarding/feeling left out

[Doodily]

Not having close friends to skate with seems to be my skating downfall. I have "friends" at the skate park... but really acquaintances. So, when I get hurt or busy and take time off, I usually end up going months without skating because I'm not getting those calls or text "let's go skate". Especially as I've gotten older, a rolled ankle takes 4-6 weeks to heal instead of 4-6 days and I end up in the same mundane daily routine - kids, work, family, etc.  It's hard to add skating back into that once it's out. I basically need a skateboard sponsor (like an AA sponsor) that checks in to make sure I've been skating that week.

Speaking of which - I'm Doodily and I'm a kook-a-holic. I haven't skated in 3 months because I hurt my ankle again and then I got busy, the weather got really cold, so I made up 1,000 excuses why I couldn't go skate.  I just bought a new deck yesterday and plan on skating this week.

[PolkaV]

One of the life lessons I learned early on from skateboarding is that you always want to surround yourself with people that are better than you.  I found that to be true of a lot things, including guitar, woodworking, machining, and most other things that have interested me in life.  You can learn a lot on your own, however I find that I hit plateaus when I'm not exposed to other people and learning new things. 

However, if I look at the hours I've spent on a skateboard, I'd say 70% of it was spent alone.  At 45, I don't have any friends that skate and my ability to do wacky shit is gone.  Any buddies that I skated with in the 80s and 90s are either long gone or dead.  I do talk to people at the skatepark, young and old, but I actually prefer to be there alone.  Skating and surfing are the only physical activities I've ever done where I can zone out and get a natural high alone.  I never considered either one to be a "team sport" or even a "sport" for that matter; that was part of the appeal to me.

[corey websturd]

I get you.Been through that too because I'm old plus my skating friend are far away since I moved into a shit hole a decade ago...Well, I would recommend to give yourself some challenges whaever your level is.And filming yourself can sometimes be a way to get pumped.
Keep the faith;)

[chris.]

I was totally out of it for a few months recently but I got out the other day and now I’m all in again.  Can’t skate today but gonna tinker with my gear.

[dallou]

Got to the park in the morning and put a nice album and have some fun. I am not super comfortable around large clique of skaters as I don’t really have a crew. I skate with 2 people mostly, I obviously know everyone and say hi but I feel awkward as fuck next to a close group of people.

[JM]

I’m going to have to take some of this advice.

Skated today for about an hour and had a solid, clear thought about 50 minutes in: “what the fuck am I doing here?”

I’m 42 about to turn 43 next month, and I just feel like I should be out on the golf course instead of at the skatepark sucking.

I don’t feel embarrassed, it’s more of a “why am I here doing my stupid slow and low tricks” existential crisis kind of question.

Everything hurts and I feel like I can’t take risks like I used to because getting hurt is the absolute worst now.

Also, I gained 25 pounds in the last six months… which really makes skating harder and nothing I can do is making the weight go away (healthy eating, more active throughout day with at least one walk of 15 minutes, and 2-5 hours of skating a week on two separate days)

I don’t know, I think if I quit skating for a few months to do something else, it’ll be really difficult to get back into it again.

Too scared to quit, if that makes sense. But too much in pain to really skate like is necessary to get the most out of it.

I don’t know… maybe trying a different park would be good. There’s a new one opening soon about 30 minutes away with some low looking stuff. There’s a 3’ quarter I could try to build up confidence to roll into (or really just do the damn thing without thinking… not thinking about it usually led to better skating)

Or go skate the mostly transition park/pump track and just get some killer aerobic exercise and fly outs.

[behavioralguide]

@Ninj2

[Ninj2]

I
Kinda always fell left out of this whole other world of soon you just busted me into my dawgs. And I am happy to find this thread thank you homies
But I always make it part of my life.
I skate to the corner store ever day
Like. A ritual thing. Different routes to different corner store  depending on my need but mostly it’s just a ritual to skate slightly down hill to the store and buy two sparkling waters in glass bottles and walk home. Maybe buy some scratchers too. But also I am not gonna hold the line up buying scratchers cuz I enjoy the flow.

[JM]

Hey took y’alls advice. I just did no pop anything 30 minute sesh (cept nocomply 180’s, a nollie here and there and exactly ONE Ollie) and just skated transition and dinky low tricks on stuff with no pop needed. Learned to roll switch up a waterfall.

It was all around super fun. 

Great to do something different. Thanks

Oh and started doing a little jump rope.

[IUTSM]

Getting bored? skate street. Not driving, parking, and skating a spot, but skating in a street, ollie onto and off of sidewalks, partial pivot over sewer caps, manual between cracks in the road or sidewalk blocks, doing 180s riding switch for a few pushes and 180ing or power sliding back to regs again and again and again. Carve the street.  Skate jazz

If you need a format or container, even pick point A to B to C and skate between them all. Just go from one place to another and find shit to skate like when parks didnt exist and you weren’t afraid of looking too whatever to be skating in the street.

Watch Gonz video days and skate around like that.

If you’re still bored after skating around like that, maybe all is lost. But i bet you won’t be bored

[JM]

Getting bored? skate street. Not driving, parking, and skating a spot, but skating in a street, ollie onto and off of sidewalks, partial pivot over sewer caps, manual between cracks in the road or sidewalk blocks, doing 180s riding switch for a few pushes and 180ing or power sliding back to regs again and again and again. Carve the street.  Skate jazz

If you need a format or container, even pick point A to B to C and skate between them all. Just go from one place to another and find shit to skate like when parks didnt exist and you weren’t afraid of looking too whatever to be skating in the street.

Watch Gonz video days and skate around like that.

If you’re still bored after skating around like that, maybe all is lost. But i bet you won’t be bored

That looooong front board was amazing. 

[in love w/ fs shuvs]

Skated today for about an hour and had a solid, clear thought about 50 minutes in: “what the fuck am I doing here?”

I’m 42 about to turn 43 next month, and I just feel like I should be out on the golf course instead of at the skatepark sucking.

I don’t feel embarrassed, it’s more of a “why am I here doing my stupid slow and low tricks” existential crisis kind of question.

Everything hurts and I feel like I can’t take risks like I used to because getting hurt is the absolute worst now.

Also, I gained 25 pounds in the last six months… which really makes skating harder and nothing I can do is making the weight go away (healthy eating, more active throughout day with at least one walk of 15 minutes, and 2-5 hours of skating a week on two separate days)

Real asf. I just broke my shit and I always asked myself the same questions but now it's just louder than before. Injuries r risky asf financially, career wise, and just make survival a whole lot harder. They also r not super fun either.

[Heshrat]

What helps me when I lose motivation skating.. is looking at it as a great opportunity to get out in the sun and be active. Maybe see some friends at the spot. Sometimes when we’re learning tricks it starts to feel like a job or chore and when you break out of that cruise under the sun you’re freed

[JM]

What helps me when I lose motivation skating.. is looking at it as a great opportunity to get out in the sun and be active. Maybe see some friends at the spot. Sometimes when we’re learning tricks it starts to feel like a job or chore and when you break out of that cruise under the sun you’re freed

Sometimes I feel like going to the skatepark just to get out the house and maybe see some homies at the park.

I think I might have even just gone to roll around and do nothing except watch good skaters do stuff, and socialize with anyone I might know.

[Frank and Fred]

Getting those trucks to axle. Make it a mission. grind grind grind....

[mfweeno]

What helps me when I lose motivation skating.. is looking at it as a great opportunity to get out in the sun and be active. Maybe see some friends at the spot. Sometimes when we’re learning tricks it starts to feel like a job or chore and when you break out of that cruise under the sun you’re freed

This mindset shift helps me a lot whenever I'm getting too tunnel visioned on "progressing" on my board. Sometimes you just need some nice weather and simple tricks to get the stoke back.

[Dad Board]

Just read through this whole thread and wanted to add my perspective for people who are having trouble staying motivated while juggling adult life, especially when it’s basically just you and your board and no one else. If you’re used to primarily skating with friends and use skateboarding as a means to socialize, do yourself a favor and forget about that entirely. That shit is out now, unless you’re one of the lucky people with an old head scene that meets up regularly in which case treasure that shit and don’t take it for granted, but for the rest us:

It’s hard to stay hyped when everything hurts, you can’t do some basic shit you did first try when you were younger or maybe you feel excluded when you see groups of people skating around you etc. you really have to learn little ways to trick yourself into not spiraling into self doubt or pity. It’s an ongoing process and it will creep up sometimes like JM said when he was like “wtf am I doing here” at the skatepark when he was struggling to live up to his expectations. Let all that shit go. Don’t have any expectations on those days. Just tell yourself you’re out here in the world with the ability to do what some people even in their physical prime aren’t capable of, which is simply riding on a skateboard.

You have to trick your own mind into not being pessimistic about your experience while you’re experiencing it sometimes. So much of it is mental and when you begin to doubt yourself and look around like “I’m too old/unskilled for this” ask yourself what you’d tell a friend if they said that. We’re too fuckin hard on ourselves and skateboarding is legitimately a privilege that we’ve earned over years of trial and error only to arrive at a place where we feel like we don’t deserve to enjoy it anymore because of all these made up factors that leak in through our experiences in the “real world” outsider friends and family or societies expectations that we should settle down and find a hobby for people our age. Fuck em. Let that shit come into your head and then boot it the fuck out. If you’re legitimately not having fun anymore it’s a great idea to take a break too. Go do some other shit for a week or two and come back to it. Don’t obsess over not having fun either, that can become its own weird self inflicted punishment.

skateboarding to me at this stage in my life is a form of personal meditation and a way for me to set challenges only for me to see how long it takes to overcome them. I will spend 2 hours trying to film a trick I’ve never done before and treat it like a boss in a video game that I can’t beat but only because I haven’t mastered the timing and movement yet. Your motivation will be your own but I promise you if it matters to you then don’t listen to the negative voices in your head. You fuckin got it, dudes. Keep pushing.

[Bongwater Mojito]

Just read through this whole thread and wanted to add my perspective for people who are having trouble staying motivated while juggling adult life, especially when it’s basically just you and your board and no one else. If you’re used to primarily skating with friends and use skateboarding as a means to socialize, do yourself a favor and forget about that entirely. That shit is out now, unless you’re one of the lucky people with an old head scene that meets up regularly in which case treasure that shit and don’t take it for granted, but for the rest us:

It’s hard to stay hyped when everything hurts, you can’t do some basic shit you did first try when you were younger or maybe you feel excluded when you see groups of people skating around you etc. you really have to learn little ways to trick yourself into not spiraling into self doubt or pity. It’s an ongoing process and it will creep up sometimes like JM said when he was like “wtf am I doing here” at the skatepark when he was struggling to live up to his expectations. Let all that shit go. Don’t have any expectations on those days. Just tell yourself you’re out here in the world with the ability to do what some people even in their physical prime aren’t capable of, which is simply riding on a skateboard.

You have to trick your own mind into not being pessimistic about your experience while you’re experiencing it sometimes. So much of it is mental and when you begin to doubt yourself and look around like “I’m too old/unskilled for this” ask yourself what you’d tell a friend if they said that. We’re too fuckin hard on ourselves and skateboarding is legitimately a privilege that we’ve earned over years of trial and error only to arrive at a place where we feel like we don’t deserve to enjoy it anymore because of all these made up factors that leak in through our experiences in the “real world” outsider friends and family or societies expectations that we should settle down and find a hobby for people our age. Fuck em. Let that shit come into your head and then boot it the fuck out. If you’re legitimately not having fun anymore it’s a great idea to take a break too. Go do some other shit for a week or two and come back to it. Don’t obsess over not having fun either, that can become its own weird self inflicted punishment.

skateboarding to me at this stage in my life is a form of personal meditation and a way for me to set challenges only for me to see how long it takes to overcome them. I will spend 2 hours trying to film a trick I’ve never done before and treat it like a boss in a video game that I can’t beat but only because I haven’t mastered the timing and movement yet. Your motivation will be your own but I promise you if it matters to you then don’t listen to the negative voices in your head. You fuckin got it, dudes. Keep pushing.

Wise words. For me the COVID-19 times improved this, as I started skating by myself again. Prepped some new slappy curbs (rub brick, concrete sealer, wax) for me and skated them. Nowadays I have a group of old heads, but because of work and family, also end up having quick solo sessions. The old prime time expectations hit me every now and then, but I have realized those times and tricks are gone. It's just a blessing to be on board at 46 years of age, aiming to get to the big five-o...

One thing I did was to delete my Instagram account. I can follow some selection of Youtube channels and new skate vids to get hyped (Vans EU anyone?), but it felt like the fast-paced clip firehose of Insta was mainly causing me anxiety and raising expectations unnecessary. It's not about what others do at this point.

I have an old homie in another town, and I film some clips for him, send them over via phone. That feels like a good balance of commitment and challenge, and as we go way back, it can be very simple stuff, just to keep the connection alive.

As I've written before, each second on the board is a blessing, and any session could be the last, so let's enjoy the moment.

[Chavo]

Having no other goals or aspirations and generally nothing else noteworthy happening in my life helps keep interest in skateboarding. I suppose you could call yourself lucky if you've found other things in life that can replace the joy of skateboarding. By 21, likely you're on a 3rd or 4th set of friends or otherwise consolidated other skate friends from a wider geographic radius. Skating alone should be second nature by now.

[oak leaf]

the thing that helps me the most is consciously remembering that even though its still a skateboard, my relationship to it is different now than when I was a kid.  then it was something to do with my friends, now its something to do for myself.  i probably didnt have the clarity of mind for that as a kid

[JM]

@Bongwater Mojito @Dad Board

Here here!

Have a gnar-bar, each of you.

Can confirm, solid advice: I went skating after like a two or maybe even three week break because of family events, or pain, or both.

Anyways, went skating tonight for 30 minutes and was really surprised at how easily I picked it back up, and it was a real joy to do just basic stuff skillfully and gracefully. (Remember kids: style matters)

That is of course until my back trucks clipped on the euro gap and I did a Heath Kirchart slide. Laid on the ground for a 10-20 seconds whining “fuuuuuck” “that hurt”.

The teenage girl felt bad for the poor old man that likely broke his hip, asking me “are you alright?”. And the nice teen dude, came over and helped me up.

The pain, camaraderie, and reminder that even falling can be done gracefully was fun

[Dr-Feelgood]

The last few years ive gone in and out of phases where im super passionate about skating again and just loving it for a few months, then life gets in the way and before i know it i havent skated in months....currently on that phase but going to go out for a roll this weekend if weather permits, find the love again.