Jason Ellis will fuck him up I reckon.
This is Bo Turner from Chromeball..
What about the Big Brother boxing beef with Simon Woodstock? How’d all that go down? He just started testing you out of nowhere!
Fuck him. Simon Woodstock is a fucking idiot. That guy should’ve just quit and moved on a long time ago. I understand what he was trying to do but he looked like a fucking asshole doing it. Being the goofy fucking guy with trucks on a skim board. I’m going to skate the contest in a wetsuit. That’s how I’m going to hold on to my career and make more money off of this shit and sell more boards. Just by being a fucking idiot. Whatever.
Now let me say that I’ve never claimed to be some hardass. I grew up the way I did and people hear these stories and think its funny. It’s like a fucking movie to people. A fucking bad movie. I know at times, I can’t even believe some of the shit that’s gone down.
But when I heard that Simon Woodstock was trying to box different guys for Big Brother, I knew that it was only a matter of time until they’d try getting me involved. I could see it coming and sure enough, one of the guys from Big Brother calls up me on a three-way call with Simon on the other end.
“Oh, I’ll fight Simon. I have no problem fighting anybody. But it has to be on my terms.”
“What do you mean?”
“Fly down to Florida and we’ll go downtown St. Petersburg into an alleyway. No gloves. No cameras. No nothing. If it takes 10 minutes or it takes an hour, we’ll go at it. After that, you can come in and interview us and take pictures. I don’t give a fuck. But it’s on my terms.”
Simon got scared. Simon got really fucking scared.
“I’ll tell you something, motherfucker. You think this is a joke? You’re gonna call me up at my house and fucking say this shit to me? You think fighting is something I just do for fun? That I’m just this fucking tough guy? You think you’re going to make light of this? You don’t understand what we had to go through down here. You’re gonna come down here and we’re going to do it my way and I promise you, you’re going to be carried off. I promise you that. If it fucking kills me, you will be maimed and you will have shit broken. I will rip your fucking ears off and bite your fucking nose off your fucking head. I don’t give a fuck what anybody says. Fighting is fighting. It’s not a fucking joke with your friends. If you want to come at me on that level and fuck with me, I will fuck you up. I will hurt you and you will scarred for life, motherfucker.”
Then I had to tell the Big Brother guys a little something.
“Tremaine, after I fucking maim him, I’m coming after you, motherfucker. For doing this shit and thinking it’s funny. When I’m done with him, you guys are next.
“Dude, it’s cool, man. It’s cool. We’re sorry! We were just…”
“I know what the fuck you were doing. You’re trying to make fun and embarrass me. I’m going to hurt you and hurt you real fucking bad. I don’t want to be involved in any of this shit. Don’t make light of this. It’s not funny.”
Needless to say, after that, I never heard from Simon again. The guys from Big Brother called 3 or 4 times after that to apologize. I understood what they were doing, just don’t do it again.