Strange Childhood Beliefs.

[backagain]

What are some weird/funny things you believed when you were a kid? What are some weird/funny things you still believe even though you know they couldn't possibly be true?

My top three were:
Babies come out of a woman's ass
The Spice Girls were awesome
That the Easter bunny watched me while I slept

I currently believe none of these things.

Mine are boring. I'm sure the Slap world has some great ones. Lets hear them. 

[ROCKxADIO420]

i thought babe ruth was black till i was probably 13

[BraveUlysses]

I've got more but these are the ones I can think of right now.

If I "planted" a fruit loop in the ground a fruit loop tree would grow.
Everyone's mom and my dad were brother and sister.
Powerpuff girls were sexy.

[4LOM]

Spade a dog by filling its pussy with sawdust

[Fairy Boy]

Definitely though shit was stored in my ass cheeks. Mom tried to freak me out while I was at the doctor's, saying i might have to get a shot in my butt. I couldn't understand why they would inject something into the otherwise useless shit-pockets i was sitting on.  

[SUPERNAUT]

I used to believe there was a being who created the universe who both loved and judged me. He also granted wishes. Pretty wacky, huh?

[Paper Crane]

always put on and tied my left shoe first. if i tied the right first i believed i'd get dizzy and fall.  

[Mooley]

I assumed that every traffic light was manned by a person who would decide when to change colours, and that when traffic was piling up it was down to one of them sucking at their job.

[duffmanshredder]

i thought babe ruth was black till i was probably 13

The same with me except instead of Babe Ruth it was Stevie Ray Vaughan.

[papasmurfsdog]

Used to think green goblins (that looked like mini-blankas from street fighter) lived in the little bump in the bottom of urinals.

[oyolar]

I assumed that every traffic light was manned by a person who would decide when to change colours, and that when traffic was piling up it was down to one of them sucking at their job.

Same here. I also thought that laws were inscribed inside curbs so if you cracked them open you could read the laws. No idea why I thought this. Especially because I used to see busted open curbs and not see anything.

[Facehead]

Denim Jackets were cool.
Jamaica, Queens, and Jamaica, the island, were the same place.
Gator wasn't guilty.

I met a girl in college who thought maggots turned into ladybugs.

[kilgore.]

i thought babe ruth was black till i was probably 13

amazing

[HyperBeam]

I used to think new york city was geographically situated in southwest nevada. i had no idea what nevada was when i held this belief, i just thought that was where NYC stood in relation to the bay area.

[DJSoftspot]

Expand Quote

I assumed that every traffic light was manned by a person who would decide when to change colours, and that when traffic was piling up it was down to one of them sucking at their job.

[close]

Same here. I also thought that laws were inscribed inside curbs so if you cracked them open you could read the laws. No idea why I thought this. Especially because I used to see busted open curbs and not see anything.

Damn I thought the same thing for a while. Probably too long.

If I was in a car and it rained, I used to think I could control the water dripping off the back window with my finger.

[Ronald Wilson Reagan]

I expected my action figures to be able to move by themselves and was disappointed over and over.

[smellyfart]

i thought that north was always in front of me no matter the direction i was facing in up until i was about 13 or 14.

[The Human Condom]

My older sister told me a story about "Water Babies" when I was a kid.  Basically, she said that a bunch of aborted fetuses would try to drown me in the local lake.

Also, I used to think there was a creature that lived in the bath tub drain.  I would feed him by pouring shampoo and soap down the drain and also peeing into his mouth.  I don't know why I thought he would enjoy my urine.

[busey]

i used to think wrestling was real.

actually, i still do

[jimi420]

Babies were conceived through kisses
Girls peed out of their asses
I believed until I was 19 that I'd get my ass kicked if I said Nigga, despite the fact that I'm black.

[brycickle]

Girls peed out of their asses

Sometimes they do. Sometimes we all do.

[Random Matt]

When I was 5 y/o my folks moved from Louisville to Pennsylvania, I thought we were moving to the place where pencils were made.  Also I was confused when I saw Kentucky Fried Chicken in PA, I had assumed it was a regional restaurant.

[wallieD]

everything on tv was live until i saw an actor in 2 different movies playing at the same time. i was 17.

[ROCKxADIO420]

Expand Quote

i thought babe ruth was black till i was probably 13

[close]

The same with me except instead of Babe Ruth it was Stevie Ray Vaughan.

okay i thought stevie ray vaughan was black till about 15 seconds ago

[Cadillac Ranch Dressing]

I thought turn signals were a very basic form of GPS. "Hmm, it's blinking -> and my dad's turning right..."
I was under the impression that several meant seven until I was like 14.
I also believed putting a slice of American cheese on my oatmeal cookie was tasty.

[The Human Condom]

I thought turn signals were a very basic form of GPS. "Hmm, it's blinking -> and my dad's turning right..."
I was under the impression that several meant seven until I was like 14.
I also believed putting a slice of American cheese on my oatmeal cookie was tasty.

For some reason, I thought saying there were "a couple" of some thing was the same as saying a few or some.  I didn't associate it with two or a pair until I was probably a teenager.  I just thought it was a subjective and vague numerical term.

[GarglesCmen]

Believed the "Ghastly Grinner" was always around/behind me so I would run everywhere as a kid. I didn't turn behind me when I was in the shower so I wouldn't stare at him. Scared the shit out of me as a kid.

[SUPERNAUT]

Believed the "Ghastly Grinner" was always around/behind me so I would run everywhere as a kid. I didn't turn behind me when I was in the shower so I wouldn't stare at him. Scared the shit out of me as a kid.

I'm amazed something from that show actually scared someone.

[The Human Condom]

Believed the "Ghastly Grinner" was always around/behind me so I would run everywhere as a kid. I didn't turn behind me when I was in the shower so I wouldn't stare at him. Scared the shit out of me as a kid.

That screencap looks like punker Hilliary Clinton.

[Will Easley]

Babies were conceived through kisses
Girls peed out of their asses
I believed until I was 19 that I'd get my ass kicked if I said Nigga, despite the fact that I'm black.

This. I was super salty when I mention it at the lunch table and niggas clowned the fuck out of me.


I also used to shit standing up for a short period of time out of fear of a tarantula crawling out of the toilet and biting me. Highly unlikely, but once I had the thought I didnt want to take any chances.