Stupid Shit You've Done

[DaSk8D00D]

ive got a ton but there are two that come to mind first. 1str was when my friend dared me to snort pixie dust (the candy fool!) for a blunt.  i actually did it, and ended up lookin like one of those cinnamon challenge niggas. he filmed it on his phone and titled it Scarface 2. 2nd one was when i was about 4 or so and i was too lazy to walk to the bathroom so i literally just pissed in the corner of my bedroom. we lived in tha hood back then so it wasnt like i really ruined anything nice but needless to say momma beat dat ass. ill prolly end up posting more later when my memory isnt shit, tell me some of your own bad ideas!

[codithou]

When I was younger I stepped on a rake to see if it would hit me in the face and it did.

[Gnarwhal]

earlier i sat in a wheelchair in the middle of the street directing traffic

[Beer Keg Peg Leg]

shot a wasp nest with a super soaker filled water and pee

[Strike A Pose]

Tipped strippers

[Perro Mojado]

got 5tacks tattoed in my wrist in high school in tribute to stacks bundles

[mandibleclaw]

tried to eat 100 buffalo wings

[The Donger]

Fucked a fat bitch.

[Ronald Wilson Reagan]

cocaine.

Moving to LA

stuffing a foil gumwrapper into an electric socket during class in school.

On a similar note, making these little things that shorted out and popped electric sockets, I showed this gnarly kid how to do it on his first day, the way he did it resulted in the thing lighting on fire, falling out of the socket and lighting some other kid's backpack on fire. He got suspended on day one, and I got my ass kicked for getting him in trouble.

Dying my entire body pink attempting to dye my hair pink when I was 13.

Trying to make an elevator to get into an abandoned barn some friends and I used as a club house when I was 10. We got a rope and a pulley and hung the pulley from the roof, my friend started at the top and put his foot in a loop on one side and I started at the bottom with my foot in a loop. A friend was holding the rope at the top to make sure it went slowly. The friend with his foot in the loop stepped off the edge and my foot slipped out of the loop instantly, he got tossed to the ground by the rope and the friend spotting literally launched about 15 feet into a tree. It was kind of amazing to see actually.

[apad88]

Shaved my eyebrows 1 week before my freshman picture was taken. I think I might still have the I.d card

[KoRnholio8]

I'm the only one missing from the group photo from the prom - getting a drink at the bar and the teacher getting sloppy at head counting. Makes me look like such a drunk.

[Bronson]

I'm the only one missing from the group photo from the prom - getting a drink at the bar and the teacher getting sloppy at head counting. Makes me look like such a drunk.

[jimi420]

my entire life.

this.

When I was 16 I decided to strip buttnaked in broad daylight by a casino and jump a 20 foot tall by 10 foot wide gap into the Missouri River. That river is filthy. Then I had to climb back up the wall while boats were driving by. Oh and I took a shit at the base of it.

airduster. nuff said.

came in a girl who wasn't on birth control.

[happenstance]

Jumping my friends car on what was literally a dirt road mega ramp. Had to have made it at least 10 feet in the air. Landed in a nose manual for about 15 feet, the front chassis snapped, the dash popped out and the floorboard popped up. Was literally squished into a little ball happy to be alive.

Bombing hills without looking at what was at the bottom or how long they are. I have told this story on here before but long story short I went about 50 mph (maybe faster. The speeding ticket I have says 45 but where I was clocked wasn't even at the bottom of the hill), slammed into a traffic circle, flew about 30 feet, left a foot deep impression in the grass, slid on my side for about 30 feet in the grass, tumbled in the street and almost got hit by a car.

Skating on injuries over and over and over... Trust me on this - let your body heal.

Took 3 bad trips on mushrooms in a row to realize I should never do hallucinogens again. Each bad trip was exactly the same. Lets just throw in trying any drug (except the mary-ju-ana)

Staying with my ex for 3 years.

Used to get in trouble for blowing things up/burning stuff in elementary and middle school. Got caught blowing up a mailbox and was caught trying to blow up a window at my elementary school (ended up being a strong window!). The worst we didn't get caught for - lit some dry brush in a creek on fire and seriously almost started a forrest fire.

Drove drunk in high school way too much.

Unprotected sex.

Took me 26 years to finally realize that when you are interested in a woman it is better to act uninterested. Crazy.

Edit: removed a couple that were bad decisions in theory that had good outcomes.

[cringe.]

turning down a offer to study at Oxford university, probably kinda stupid but i don't regret it (...yet?)

[Beer Keg Peg Leg]

haha if i got a speeding ticket for bombing a hill i would frame that shit and put it above my mantle

[happenstance]

^I am one step ahead of you. Seriously though, it was a gnarly near death experience. I re-lived it in my head sporadically for the next 2 or 3 months and it would give me anxiety and sometimes panic attacks.

[Beer Keg Peg Leg]

i bombed the fastest hill of my life drunk on christmas eve 2010. i almost made it to the bottom but the speed wobbles literally made me look like i was slaloming between cones or something. i got tossed from the board and slid on my front for about 5 or 6 meters. put a huge gaping hole in my knee that they couldnt' stitch because there was no skin to suture, so i was left with this oozing pus-hole for months. the swelling in my knee didn't go down for about 6 weeks either so i could barely move it. hillbomb slammaz 4 lyfe.

edit: would't say mine was near-death though haha, yours sounds scary as fuck

[Hercules Rockefeller]

shit, that story left me cringing... my left knee kept on tickling.

[happenstance]

Beer Keg - I walked away with mild whiplash, a bloody nose and what looked like a few hundred razor blade cuts on my arm. Turns out grass can fuck you up when you are sliding across it at 50 mph. Your story is worse considering you fell on concrete. Pretty sure I would have died or be a vegetable if I didn't make it to the grass. Happy we are both in one piece!

Lets also add bombing hills in the rain/when the ground is wet. That one has turned out bad for me on a few occasions. One time I was bombing a hill going to my friends house in SF. I was at least a mile and a half away. It had just rained. I am bombing a hill that curves, slide out and tear my hands up bad. Literally blood pouring from my hands. I walk the rest of the way with my arms covered in blood and people are looking at me half worried for me and half thinking I am insane or something.

[DaSk8D00D]

i have a crazy hill bombing story as well. a few years ago i was out at my dads house in this fancy ass subdivision & i would fuck around with my younger siblings riding bikes down this kinked hill that stretched about 3-4 blocks. looong blocks cuz the front yards were huge. its pretty steep and ona bike it was damn fun to ride down. at the end is one of those long uphill driveways so itd absorb all your momentum when youd ride up it. i was feeling ballsy and tried to bomb it ona board. keep in mind i was like 12 and this hill was not some pretty shit, it was definitely a big boy hill bomb. anyways i get halfway down it and im fucking FLYING down this thing, after i get past the flatter part in the middle i get about half way down and decide to go off to the side and land in the grass. i hop off my board and i must flown like 12 feet into the grass. i tried to land flat on my feet but i just got flung forward after my leg hit the ground. ended up tearing my meniscus and had super sore knees for at least 2 years. whats crazy is that that next summer i was dunking on a lowered rim and after i did some basic ass dunk i blake griffined myself. as soon as i landed i felt something in my OTHER knee give out. it looked like i landed perfect fine too, but i immediatly knew that i tore my meniscus yet again, and i had another sore knee to go along with my other one. i was limping every for about a month or 2 and when i finally was able to skate again i always had to extensively stretch beforehand. i wasnt even in high school yet and i literally had old man knees. if i stopped skating for 10 minutes id have to restretch them all overagain cuz theyd tighten up. didnt truly get over that shit for YEARS. i think i stopped noticing it after my freshman year in high school but i got both injuries in 6th-7th grade. even now i have a very tender area on my knee that hurts with even the slightest force

[Ronald Wilson Reagan]

Used to get in trouble for blowing things up/burning stuff in elementary and middle school. Got caught blowing up a mailbox and was caught trying to blow up a window at my elementary school (ended up being a strong window!). The worst we didn't get caught for - lit some dry brush in a creek on fire and seriously almost started a forrest fire.

We had similar youths. I got sent home early in 4th grade for starting a little bonfire out of woodchips in the playground, some kleenex, and matches. I got kicked off the bus for the year in 8th grade for lighting one of the seats on fire while trying to make lighter smiley faces, and also suspended for flicking lit matches into lockers in the gym locker room in 7th grade. I still am a pyro, I just am better at controlling it now.

[ivegotlevitation]

Sprayed water in my neighbor's mailbox every day for a month, completely ruining his mail when I was 7.
Stole my baseball coach's cell phone when I was 12.
Took acid with some friends last year and tried to walk a few miles to the closest Wal-Mart. A cop pulled over and ran all our ID's wondering what the fuck we were doing out walking at 3 in the morning.
Slashed kids bicycle tires in my neighborhood when I was 12.
Stole Pokemon Ruby for GBA from a friend's birthday party when I was little. I got caught.

[get gnarly]

Forrest fire.

Puking/pissing on peoples doors at 3am and ringing the doorbell.

Destroying people's shit/mailboxes.

Calling girls I don't know cunts.

Blowing an internship.

Ruining my mind with drugs and alcohol. Not that I'm fried, but I'd be insanely smart otherwise.

Definitely more shit

[Joe Pesci]

bombed a pretty gnarly hill where i used to live that was like an upside down T ... there was no where to go at the bottom except left or right but i didnt really realize it until i was down there trying to turn away. ended up running fast as fuck jumped up a curb and tripped over one of those little tarp fences used on construction sites

[Amish Rifle]

This girl I was into was home alone, parents on their way home from a vacation, boyfriend at work. I had time to get it and get out but out of no where her boyfriend dropped by so I had to hide in the parents room while he hung out. It was a close call.

[Clayton]

Right after I graduated high school I had a shit load of grad-money in my wallet. A van pulls up at a gas station with three dudes and the back is filled with stereo surround sounds for TVs. One of them walks up to me and starts his sales pitch. Shows me the catalog they are featured in where they retail for $2500. He tells me he'll sell me one for $300. In my head I thought, "hmmm VX2000s retail for that much and sell on ebay for $1300. I can make a profit!" I give him $300 that under any other circumstance I wouldn't have had. Immediately go home and log on ebay. I find numerous versions of the same models starting at $70 with zero bids. I couldn't even use the surround sound myself because it was the fancy kind you needed an amp for. After holding onto it for 7 years out of spite I finally threw that shit out.

Also driving home blackout drunk, waking up the next morning finding puke residue I didn't remember creating, the keys still in the front door, and my car parked crooked as hell with the blinker still on after starting it the next morning.

[ontheswarm]

These are some pretty good stories.

Staying with my ex for 3 years.

Skating my fractured ankle not letting it heal properly.

Quitting my $14 hour job in vegas to move to la. Love the skating in la though.

So I was about 13 or 14 going out with this girl. Her mom and my mom decided to go out to eat somewhere because they were close. My girl and I decided it would be a good idea for me to go to her house real quick so I could smash. I think I was putting it in as her mom walks in the door. We both trip out and she has me hide in the closet. I'm thinking I will just stay there till she goes to sleep no big deal. I was younger and it was getting late so moms is blowing up my phone. I just tell her the truth and tell her to not say anything I will be fine and make it home. Well it was about 1 in the morning and her mom finally decided to go to sleep. I'm sneaking down the stairs and have to dip out with no shoes because she hid them in the garage and it would be too loud to open the door. I make it out and I'm thinking im home free and I'll just call my mom and she'll come get me. As I am pulling out my phone walking down her street I see my moms car. I walk over to her car and get in. She literally called her mom two seconds before I got in the car to tell her the whole situation. She drove me back to her house and we all sat down and had a talk.

[happenstance]

I thought of more:

My friend was at the chalk board with the teacher in Junior year of high school. I threw a pencil at my friend, missed and it came within a centimeter of my teachers head. They both turn around and my jaw is just dropped in shock. No way to cover up I did it, she just knew. She of course has me stay after class and was thinking of what to do. I somehow talked her out of doing anything.

In 7th grade I sprayed my friend's cologne on this girl I had a crush on (because you bully the girls you like at that age, ha!). She broke out in a rash and pretty much hated me until Sophomore year. Blew it with her.

Ran from a cop at gun point while smoking weed Junior year. He let everyone off and I was the subject of a city-wide manhunt in Irvine (the cops are pretty bored there). I was chased at least 6 different times during the day. Jumped through so many backyards to hide, got chased by dogs and people. Actually made it home but the cops were already there when I showed up. Turns out all my friends played dumb as to who I was but one said "I don't know him but that is his car". Moron!

Used to smoke weed on my high school campus all the time.

Again, high school, took 4 vicadin one time and forgot. Smoked a bunch of weed (with Krystal Steal before she began her porn career ) after and pretty much felt like I was going to die. Turned ghost white, had some mild tremors and saw colors. It was scary.

I mentioned I drove drunk but one time was especially bad... In high school again... I drank 6 pitchers of beer. My house was 6 blocks away. I get in my car, close the door, immediately open the door and puke a pile of beer foam 2 feet across on the pavement. Close the door and proceed to projectile vomit, exorcist style, more vomit than I have ever seen in my life in my car. Had to be over a gallon.

I was such a fuck-up until college. Made a lot of sense though because my home life was about as fucked up as it can get. Besides all the brain-cells I lost in the process, I think it worked to my benefit. I got all the partying out of my system and when I went to college I was super focused. Got straight A's at Berkeley. I feel like I could go on forever in this thread.

[woodsman]

I threw a brick at some guys head in the middle of some stupid brawl. Thank god the kid ducked it. Had I smashed his face in like I planned I would probably still be in prison